


Despite everything, it's still you...

by AsraElenavra



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Abusive Relationship, Angst, Chara Protection Squad, Depression, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Major character death - Freeform, Mute Frisk, Other, Past Rape/Non-con, Post Pacifist-Route, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Sans, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader has a name... And Personality... I guess it's more of 2nd POV, Readers Boyfriend is a Dick, Self-Harm, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, Suicide Attempt, babies first fanfic, lots of puns, please don't hit me, puns, reader is female
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-05-12 07:48:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 41
Words: 135,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5658364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsraElenavra/pseuds/AsraElenavra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stuck. You were stuck in this never ending cycle of emptiness, slowly suffocating you, but unwilling to let you end this.<br/>But who knew, that the long awaited silver lining would finally appear? And even more surprising, in the form of a group of Monsters, especially that one skeleton in a blue hoodie.  </p><p>But will you be able to keep this feeling, or will you lose it all over again?</p><p> </p><p>-Part one: Elaine- Chapter 1-37<br/>-Part two: Asra- Chapter 38-?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. All thanks to that stupid phone

**Author's Note:**

> So, this thing's been stuck in my head since forever.... Hope you'll like it  
> And please be gentle, it's my first ff in a loooooooong time, and I am pretty nervous <3  
> Oh, the things Undertale does to me...

Your mother once told you, that there was good in everything, even if it didn't look like it. You figured she was right. If you didn’t drop your phone this morning, breaking it, you would have been able to call your friends, so they would pick you up, instead of walking home right now. If your phone would have worked, you’d be blasting music, completely blocking out the rest of the world. And if you wouldn’t have walked home without your music, you would not have heard the strange sounds from one of the small alleyways that you were passing.  
Heh, funny, how one little thing can change someone’s life that fast.

Blue. The ceiling was blue. It was the first thing you noticed upon waking up and it confused you. The walls you knew never were blue, much less the ceiling. Hugh would never do such a thing; it would be outrageous, scandalous even. So, why were the ones you were looking at right now blue? Admittedly, it was a pretty colour, indeed, but so gosh darn confusing. How did you even get here? The last thing you remembered, was that alley and…  
With a loud gasp you jolted upwards, your messy, black locks covering most of your face.  
“The kid…” It could barely be considered a whisper, more like a soundless attempt to force the words out of you. Before you could even grasp another thought, pain was raging through your head, a very familiar kind of pain. Someone must have hit you pretty hard.  
Groaning, you pressed your hands against your temples and squeezed your eyes shut. It was just too much. It was always worse upon waking up. Already used to the feeling of your stomach rising, you were able to forcefully calm yourself down.  
“Oh dear… She’s awake.” you’ve heard someone say. The voice sounded very kind and soothing and reminded you of your grandmother.  
You managed to choke out a small “Where am I?”, yet barely audible. “And what time is it?” Your head was still pounding, but you lowered your hands anyway. You could feel your fingers brush over something soft, a blanked maybe? It would at least explain the sensation of weight on your legs.  
“It’s about 10pm, dear. And don’t worry, you are safe.” 10pm? Like at night? You let out an involuntary gasp and your eyes flew open, even though you could barely see anything due to the bright light shining directly in your eyes. Everything was just a blurry mess of colours.  
“Oh no! I am… I am late! He will be so mad!” Hastily, you pulled way the covers and swung your legs over the edge of the bed. You could feel a warm hand on your shoulder that felt almost… fluffy? Whoever it was must be wearing gloves or so.  
“Everything is alright, my child. You are hurt, please stay in bed!” You could hear the kind voice tell you again. Oh, they just did not understand!  
“I’m fine, really…” You mumbled. “I-… I just need to go, I’m sorry.”  
“Well, they seem a bit in a rush, Toriel!” Another unfamiliar voice. Definitely female and very enthusiastic. Great. "I'll go check up on the tweep, okay?"  
In order to get your head clear, you almost violently shook it, with the only outcome that your hair was now an even bigger mess and a light dizziness was added to your headache. Well done, really well done! Despite everything, you jumped to your feed, fiddling to get a hold of your phone that was still in your pocket. As you pulled it out, you vision finally grew clear again, just in time so you could remember that the useless thing was broken. Even better. Shaking it in the hope, that this might fix it, you started walking forward blindly, which is never a good idea when you might have a concussion. You should know that by now, but for now, you don’t really seem to ‘ve learned from past experiences.  
The next thing you knew, was that you were lying on the floor, your face pressed the soft, off-white carpet and a whole bunch of voices, shouting and talking, interrupting each other.  
“Ow, ow, ow…” Your voice was terribly quiet, the words pressed out between your clenched teeth. “I take it back, I’m not fine… Where am I?”  
“TORIEL, I THINK THE HUMAN BROKE!” The loud shouting made your ears ring and squeeze your eyes again.  
“I am sure we can fix them, Papyrus. Just give them their space, everybody, yes?” the kind voice said again and you could see someone, kneeling just in front of you. Was that… White fur? No, impossible! “Are you alright, young one? You’ve passed out for a few seconds after standing up so quickly.” Carefully, you pushed yourself off the floor, head’s down, until you awkwardly shuffled into a sitting position. Only now you allowed yourself to get annoyed by the hair in your face and brushing it back with one hand while also hoping to flatten out the bumps at the same time. The immediate silence in the room was almost visible. On the one hand because you darted around the room, well, not shocked by what you were seeing, but rather fairly surprised. The person in front of you, indeed, had fur. However, only because you were sitting on the opposite of a Goat Monster, and a very beautiful one nonetheless. They had a very kind face and womanly figure. And they were tall. Not only for you, but in general, very tall, at least 7ft tall. In fact, everyone in the room appeared to be a monster. Not that it bothered you, not at all. Ever since they came to the surface four years ago, each and every monster you’ve met seemed to be very nice and friendly. It was just surprising.  
And they were silenced by, well, you, you guessed. The Goat Monster, did someone call her Toriel or did you just imagine the loud, enthusiastic voice saying that?, slowly blinked before giving you a big, almost motherly smile, that made you blush.  
“Well, that certainly is surprising…” she sighed and you could not stop yourself from returning a tiny, shy smile.  
“WHY DOES THE HUMAN HAVE RED EYES, SANS?” you could hear the loud voice again and turned your head towards the direction it was coming from. It seemed to belong to a tall… well… a tall skeleton, as crazy as that sounded. He was wearing something like armour or so, as well as a red cape and scarf and fitting boots and gloves.  
"How hard did I hit my head again?" you muttered under your breath.  
“Heh, dunno, bro, maybe they are a special kind of hue-man?” The one answering was a skeleton as well, but much shorter than his brother, with a big smile plastered onto his skull and cladded into a blue hoodie with grey fur lining as well as black shorts. When you saw his pinkish house slippers you could not stop yourself from thinking, that this was a wise man.  
“SANS!”, the tall one shrieked at his brother pun while you couldn’t stop yourself from letting out a small laugh. Oh boy, that was so bad, that it was funny again.  
“I’m sorry I startled you…” you whispered. “It’s… weird, I know.” Again, you couldn’t help yourself but smile at them. Toriel sighed and reached out her hand, so you could take it.  
“Don’t worry, my child. It is alright, yes? Why don’t you sit down at the table for a while? Would you like a cup of tea?” Hesitantly, you took her hand and let her guide you to the kitchen, where you sat down, continuously kneading your own hands. The two skeletons followed you.  
“HUMAN, WOULD YOU LIKE SOME SPAGHETTI, TO HELP YOU GET WELL AGAIN?” the tall one exclaimed and you just shook your head.  
“No, no thank you. I, uhm, I don’t think I can eat right now. I still feel a little dizzy…” You hated yourself for how weak your voice was.  
“Don’t sweat it, kid. I don’t have the stomach for it either right now” The stupid pun made you giggle again while the tall skeleton let out a loud groan. But then it hit you like a bus and you slammed your hands on the table, barely able to breathe, while the three monsters looked at you surprised and a little bit concerned.  
“The kid…” you whispered.  
“HUMAN? ARE YOU ALRIGHT?”  
“There was a kid… in the alley… Oh god.” You started shaking. “What happened? Are they okay?” You knew that there was panic in your eyes, when you looked at Toriel, yet she just continued to smile and put a cup of tea in front of you and patted your hand.  
“Frisk is alright, dear. Thanks to you. They are sleeping right now, so don’t worry! Undyne is with them.” You let out a sigh of relief and closed your eyes for a second.  
“Thank goodness!”  
“Yeah, Thanks a bunch for that, kiddo.” You gave the small skeleton a weak smile and took a sip of the drink. It was pretty good.  
“Don’t mention it. I… I just couldn’t let a bunch of tweeps beat up a little child. Wait, did you say Frisk? Like, in “The Monster Ambassador Frisk”-Frisk?”  
“Yup, the one and only…”  
“That explains so much. No wonder those idiots were…” You didn’t finish your sentence, couldn’t. Even thinking about it, made your brains hurt. Not as much as the punch that probably knocked you out but still pretty bad.  
“I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAS TO THANK YOU, HUMAN, FOR SAVING MY DEAR FRIEND!”  
“It’s okay, really.”  
“HUMAN, PLEASE, TELL ME YOUR NAME, SO WE CAN BE FRIENDS TOO!”  
“Wha..?” You could feel yourself blushing and bit your lips. Friends? “I’m… I’m… My Name’s…” You swallowed hard, twirling a strand of your hair around your finger. “Elaine, name’s Elaine”  
“Well, nice to meet ya, Elaine!” The small skeleton stated with a wink. “I’m Sans, Sans the Skeleton. And that’s my brother Papyrus.”  
“And I am Toriel. Papyrus is right, we are very thankful, that you protected Frisk.” You let out a insecure smile again, before taking another sip of tea.  
“No, no. I am the one to say thank you. You brought me here, after I got knocked out, right?”  
“Yes, indeed.”  
“I-I hope, this doesn’t sound rude, but I should really go now. My… boyfriend… I’m sure he’s already very worried because I did not come home yet.” Well, more like furious, but they don’t need to now. Or ever. “I am glad, that Frisk is alright, could you tell them that?”  
“But, why, of course!” Toriel seemed like such a sweet and kind person, it really warmed your heart and you asked yourself if they were somewhat of Frisk’s mom. They sure had that motherly aura.  
“You sure, you’ll be alright? You got hit on the head pretty badly there?” Sans eyes, or rather the little white lights in his sockets were scouting you, but you just nodded.  
“Yeah, yeah, I’m ‘ait. I got worse already, don’t worry!” This time, your smile was just a tad bit sad, but you managed to hide it. The three monsters accompanied you too the door and you thanked all of them again, before walking into the darkness.  
  
                                                                                _____________________

The house was dark when you arrived, and you shivered, but not because it was cold. Your hoodie actually did a pretty good job at keeping you warm. Yet, you still felt an already well known coldness creeping up your spine. The last time you came across a clock, it was almost 1am. Your fingers were playing with the edge of your hood that was covering most of your long, black locks, as well as your eyes. You hated your eyes.  
The front door of the house made a loud creaking sound upon swinging open and you shivered again. As silent as possible, you entered and crept inside. Just as you were passing the study a light went on and you swallowed hard, turning towards it.  
“H-Hugh…” If you thought, that your voice was quiet and shaky before, that was nothing compared to this. He was sitting in one of the big chairs, his face hard and stern.  
“Elaine… You’re late!”


	2. What a bloody mess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got awfully long and awfully dark I am sorry.

Your body would probably hurt for the next few days, but you were expecting such a thing after what happened. With a deep sigh and shaky hands you took your concealer from the make up stash and started applying it with feather light touches to cover up your bruised face. It still ached a lot but you were so used to it by now, that you didn’t even bother to move a muscle in your face to show your discomfort. Just a few minutes later all of the blue and purple spots were gone, flawlessly blended into your skin. The practise really paid off, as well as the lessons you took when you were younger and still wanted to become a make up artist. This dream, of course, would later dissolve into nothingness, but it’s still a skill you could and would put to good use.  
Just as you were brushing through your wavy hair, trying to untangle all of the little knots that you would get every night, you heard someone nocking at the front door.  
“Curious… Very curious…” you mumbled to yourself, getting up from your chair. As you walked to the door, you braided your hair into a very loose skeleton braid, laying over your shoulder. “Who is it?”  
“Elaaaaaaine! Open up! It’s me!” a shrill voice pierced your ears, even through the sturdy door.  
“Oh no…” you mumbled, your hand trembling over the handle, forcing your brightest smile onto your face, the one where you would show off your dimples before opening up. “Rebecca, I did not expect you to see you. What brings me the honour of you paying a visit?” The woman on the other side of the door let out a lout laugh that has always reminded you of a 90’s comic book villain laugh; the goofy and ridiculous kind of course; before she pushed past you into the house.  
“Since when does a girl need an excuse to visit her best friend, huh?” she chirped whilst making herself home by raiding your coffee machine and fridge. Yeah, ‘best friend’, why not? “What, no cake?”  
“Yeah, I kinda need to watch my weight…”  
“That is bullshit, and you know that, Dearie! You are as thin as a rake! You are already so tiny and fragile, there is no need to starve yourself!” You rolled your eyes behind her back, while she poured herself some milk for her coffee. Like you didn’t know that.  
“Hugh thinks I should lose some weight. He says I gained a little bit, doesn’t like it much.” You could see exactly that Rebecca was flinching from the corner of your eyes and bit your tongue.  
“I-I mean… you did gain a few ponds over the last couple weeks. He probably just wants you to be healthy and lose the extra weight.” she stuttered while flashing a bright smile. Bullshit!, you thought all by yourself. You didn’t gain even a single gram, to be honest, it was the exact opposite, you even lost some. “He is a very considerate boyfriend after all.” The blonde sat down next to you, her green eyes seemingly gazing off the distance, almost longing. “I would do everything to get someone like him. You are so lucky…” Her sweet and innocent words made a bitter feeling rise up and burn inside you. How can a person be so blunt and naïve? It was just…  
Quickly, you shook your head, smiling bright again.  
“Yeah…. Aren’t I just the… luckiest girl in the world?” It was hard to contain your sarcasm but you still managed.  
“Yeah, totally…. So, anyways, why didn’t you pick up your phone earlier? I tried to call you before coming over.”  
“I.. uh… It broke.” you explained absentmindedly, your voice barely a mumble. “Got robbed yesterday…”  
“What, robbed?” Rebecca looked genuinely worried and shocked, hence why your smile was genuine this time.  
“Yeah, uhm… There were some stupid hooligans tryin’ to beat up that child and, ya know, I can’t stand violence at all, so I stepped in. The kid got away safely, but I got knocked out pretty badly.” She grabbed your hand from over the table, lips trembling.  
“Are you okay? Did they do anything?”  
“No, no, don’t worry. The kid got their family and they picked me up. It was pretty nice of them, since I was unconscious for quite a while. So yeah, that’s why I did not pick up.”  
“Oh my god, how scary! Hugh must have been so worried, when you didn’t come home” You involuntarily frowned upon those words and rolled your eyes.  
“Yeah, he was pretty… _beat up_ about it…”     
“I can imagine, what a horrible thing!”  
“Yeah…” you mumbled, not really in the mood to talk. This kind of conversation went on for a while, Rebecca-or Becca, as she insisted, since you were such _good_ friends-chirping about worthless nonsense until you could hear keys rustle in the key hole and instinctively stiffened.  
“Elaine? I am home!” Hugh’s voice echoed through the hallway into the dining room where you sat at the moment. You stood up with a barely noticeable sigh and a fake, happy smile plastered to your face. Your steps were feather-light as you walked to the door, greeting the newcomer. He was a lot taller than you, which wasn’t very surprising, giving your tiny statuesque of just 5’1” and almost frail appearance. I would be so easy to just… break or crush you, snap you in half.  
Brown eyes were scanning you from that deceivingly handsome face and made you shiver.  
“Hello, dear. We are having a visitor over.”  
“Oh we do?” he purred with a raised eyebrow. Oh, how you hated, when he did that.  
“Y-yes. Rebecca-“  
“Becca, dear!” She shouted from the dining room while closing in.  
“-Becca made a surprise visit. Isn’t that absolutely delightful?”  
“Yes it is, babe.” He put an arm around your waist and you instinctively flinched, as he brushed over an especially painful bruise. For just a second, he had this displeased look in his eyes, before pulling you closer for a kiss.  
“Aaaaaw, you two are just the perfect couple!” Rebecca squeed, as you pulled away, seemingly embarrassed.  
“W-We have guest!” you stuttered and shuffled to escape the slightly too rough grip.  
“I know, but since when does that exclude greeting my little wifey?”  
“Oh, aren’t you just the cutest! I should be going anyways, so don’t worry, I won’t keep you up any time longer” When she laughed and winked at you, you had a hard time not to blush right there. “We-he-heeell then, Toodles, you love birds!” You couldn’t even finds words fast enough before she was out the door, almost skipping with glee.  
“You flinched.” Hugh suddenly growled and you swallowed hard, as you could feel him towering behind you.  
“You surprised me. I am sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He just made a snarly remark which you chose to ignore.  
“We are having guests over for dinner. I expect you to make something nice, okay?”  
“Y-Yes, of course. I wanted to pay mother a visit today and head to the grocery store after that. Would that be alright? Do you have any special wishes?”  
“Yeah, guess I’ll be coming with you. I don’t want you to _get hurt again_ after all...”  
His voice filled you with dread again.  
  
  
You gave your mother a little kiss on the forehead and flashed a little smile.  
“I love you Mom. I’ll be back soon. I really miss you.” Your voice was quiet, even though your mother could not be awoken by it. The steady beeping of the monitors and clinical smell neither. There was barely any hope left, that she would ever wake up again, but you clinged to what little there was, still wishing for her to wake up from her coma. A single tear slipped from your eye as you got up from the chair to leave the sterile looking hospital room, Hugh waiting outside. He hated this so called sappy shit, no matter how important it was to you.  
“You done already?”  
“Y-Yeah, we can go…” you whispered. The visits at the hospital always left you so worn out. Heads down, you started to walk towards the entrance, your boyfriend right behind you.  
“Why do you even come here? It’s not like she would notice…”  
“Dunno. It helps, I guess…”  
“Hmmmh, that’s stupid. But a deal’s a deal.”  
“’Ait…” None of you spoke until you arrived at the super market, where he immediately left you alone to get whatever the hell he needed.  
While you were browsing the aisles, you had to think back to the monsters. Their kindness stuck to you, crept into your mind and just wouldn't leave. I confused and intrigued you at the same time.  
Ever since the barrier broke four years ago, and a small human child, that went missing came back from that mountain accompanied by a pack of monsters, you've heard stories about.  
A lot of stories.  
Mother had always told you about them. Kind creatures, made out of magic and compassion. It amused you as a child, you always loved the stories. But that was it. Stories. Nothing more. So one could have imagined the general surprise and confusion when it turned out, that they were, in fact, true. Monsters were very real and people took it.. Differently. Most people were excited or just didn’t care at all. But a lot of them… didn’t apply to it so kindly. There were a lot of news about monsters getting attacked and by now it seemed to be a natural part of them, just like the weather. And people cared about just the same. Which was, well, aggravating. But why would you act so surprised anyways? Humans never gave a shit about anything, even their own kind. They just pretended to be happy and all goodie-shoes. It really shouldn’t surprise you, but it still broke your heart. You felt bad for each and every kind soul that got attacked and wished just so badly, that you could help them.  
Heh, you thought to yourself, they must really hate humans. No wonder, how we treat them. And yet...  
And yet they took you in, when you were hurt. Admittedly, you got hurt because you tried to stop a bunch of hooligans of beating up a little child, but there were more than enough humans out there, who would have just left you there on the ground, all on your own.  
After all, you were used to it. And so it stuck to you.    
Another thing, that stuck to you were the happy, childish giggle that echoed through the store and made your heart jump. There was nothing that sounded more beautiful to you than the happy laugh of a child. You hummed happily yet stopped immediately when you felt someone bumping into you, pulling you down on the floor with them.  
“Uff… Careful there” Confused you looked around until you met with a familiar face.  You couldn’t help yourself but starting to grin. “Well, if it isn’t… Frisk, was it, ait?” The round face of the child you saved just mere days ago lit up in recognition and they nodded excited. “Welp, you just keep knocking me off my feet, kid.” Frisk started to giggle, which made you smile again. Groaning, you started to get back on your feet and started to pick up your stuff from the floor. Tiny hands helped you, so you got everything back in no time. You realized that Frisk wasn’t much smaller than you, which made you frown for a second. This was a child, for fucks sake and you are an adult. Being tiny sucked, but you wouldn’t complain. “Thanks a bunch dearie. Now, how come we keep bumping into each other? No scary men I need to scare away this time, I hope!” Again, they shook their head, sending brown strands of hair flying everywhere.  
_No, I’m shopping with Mom and my Uncles!_  
For a second, you just stood there in complete shock, slowly blinking, before you felt yourself smiling immensely. You haven’t seen anyone use sign language in quite a while and you had to think for a moment before you started to move your hands.  
_Oh, that sounds nice! Did you run off though?_  
The utter surprise and glee on Frisk’s face made you happy and you had a really hard time following the little flaps and movements of their hands, no matter how hard you tried.  
“Who-whoa there, little buddy, not so fast… I’m not that good, okay?” Your laugh seemed to be sincere, you could not help yourself but being happy around the little fella.  
_Wait here!_  
Your eyebrows raised up at the odd request but you smiled anyways. Frisk shot away faster than you could look and you asked yourself how someone could be that energetic. Oh well, they still were a small kid, they tended to be full of energy. A mere seconds later, you heard more voices nearing, yet chose to ignore it, yet again preoccupied with the right kind of ingredients for your dinner later.  
“WHERE ARE WE GOING, TINY HUMAN? WHAT DO YOU WANT TO SHOW US?”  
“Yeah, no need to rush, buddy.” That’s odd, the voices seemed very familiar to you.  
And then it hit you. They belonged to the monsters that picked you up. Of course, frisks uncles. You were just about to turn around as you could feel the soft tap at your shoulder. Frisk beamed up to you, the two skeletons just a few feet behind them. In fact, they were still holding the hand of the taller one. Seems like they’ve been dragged here.  
_TA-DA!_  
The kid seemed to be very proud with themselves that you let out a small giggle.  
“OH, SLIGHLY LESS TINY HUMAN!” the tall skeleton shouted excited and pulled you into a close hug that was practically rib crushing, even without a bruised body. What was his name again, though? “I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM OVERJOYED TO SEE YOU AGAIN! YOU LEFT IN SUCH A RUSH, WE WERE WORRIED IF YOU CAME HOME ALRIGHT!”  
“Y-yeah, I am just fine. Don’t worry! I am very thankful for your help, still!” This time, your smile was a little bit less genuine.  
“Heh, don’t sweat it, kid. You helped our little sprout here..” he said, while ruffling Frisk’s hair “so it’s just natural to return the favour.”  
The kid started pulling on your sleeve so you smiled down at them.  
_Yeah, what is it, dearie?_  
_Wanna join us for dinner?_  
You looked them a little set back, starting to bite your lip, your eyes darting around the store, getting worried by the second.  
_I’d love to, hun, but I can’t…_  
Your signing appeared to be kind of stiffened, not being used to it for now. Frisk pouted at you but you just couldn’t possibly do it.  
“Heh, most people don’t know how to deal with Frisk when they’re signing. How come?” Sans. You remembered his name just fine.  
“My mom was born deaf-mute, so I grew up with ASL, otherwise I would have been pretty boned, ya know, trying to communicate and stuff” Papyrus next to you started groaning, but you didn’t know why-yet.  
“OH GOD, HERE WE GO. SANS, DON’T U DARE!”  
“Can’t bro, they started it. Can’t a guy just be humerus? I mean, they are really rattling my bones here.” The big smile plastered on Sans face seemed to widen a bit as both you and Frisk started to giggle a little bit.  
“OH MY GOD, SANS!” It was hard to not enjoy yourself around these people, so it was just natural that your giggle grew into a laugh after a while. However, it froze immediately in place, when you felt the familiar sensation of an arm, sneaking around your waist.  
“Hey babe. Who’s that?” the low voice of your so called boyfriend rumbled next to you. It sent shivers down your spine. “They bothering you?”  
“N-no, not at all…” you welped, your eyes glued to the floor. Hugh hated monsters, there was no beating around the bush. If it was up to him, he’d sent them straight back under the mountain.  
“ARE YOU A FRIEND OF THE SLIGHLY LESS TINY HUMAN? I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, AM PLEASED TO MEET YOU!” How could Papyrus be so cheery? Did he not feel the pre threat that was oozing out if every pore of the men next to you, his fingers digging almost painful into your waist.  
“Why do you hang around folk like that, babe? You know they don’t mean well…” You had to try so hard to not start shaking and just ignore Hugh’s flat out rudeness.  
“Th-They are nice… I am sorry…” Your voice was barely there, his grip tightening a little bit. You could see Sans frowning and asked yourself how a skeleton can possibly have facial expressions.  
“What?”  
“N-Nothing. I’ll just grab a few things and we can leave, if you want to.”  
“Yeah...” You gave the very confused Skele-bros and Frisk a tiny wave as well mustering up the strength for a little smile. You gulped and tried to brace yourself for later.  
You did not notice them watching you, as you left the story, visibly uncomfortable, as your boyfriend touched you and even slapped your ass at the register.

The next morning was rough for Sans, as he got greeted by a slightly concerned Papyrus. A quick glance at the clock showed him that it wasn’t even 7am.  
“What’s up Papyrus? I’m sleeping…”  
“I-I KNOW BUT… I MUST TELL YOU SOMETHING, THAT IS WORRING ME A LOT!” Rather confused, Sans sat up, rubbing his eyesockets.  
“W-what’s up?”  
“THE…HUMAN… IS AT OUR DOOR!” Poor Papyrus looks so rattled, kneading his hands and everything.  
“What? Nah, Frisk’s at the living room. They fell asleep together with Undyne and Tor…”  
“NO, NOT THAT HUMAN! THE… OTHER… HUMAN!”  
“Other human? What are you..?” Suddenly, he seemed to realise and hurled out of bed. “What? What do they want?”  
“I DON’T KNOW…. THEY SEEM TO BE… NAPPING. I DON’T THINK THEY ARE WELL!” He didn’t need to say more before his brother went to the door and outside. His eyes were scanning the area, without finding anyone until the little lights in his eye sockets were glancing down. And there you were.  
Leaning at the wall in front of the apartment, hurled up into a ball, the hood of your sweater covering your face.  
“Oh, that human…” he mumbled before crouching next to you, slightly tapping your shoulder.  “Hey kiddo. Time to wake up. Whatcha doin’ here?” You started to shift, probably waking up and the smaller skeleton of the two froze up instantly, when he saw your face. “Shit!”  
“SANS? WHAT IS WRONG?” Papyrus exclaimed and tried to squeeze past his brother, but Sans did not react, he was to startled. From under the hood a pale face, covered in fresh bruises and bleeding gashes, looked up at him.  
“I’m Sorry…”

 


	3. Cruising for a Bruising

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or in which Elaine might be just a little tiny bit gay for a fish and Frisk is a nosey little child

  “I’m sorry…” 

  
You haven’t spoken since then. You didn’t know how much time has passed since then, but it must have been at least a few hours since everyone in the small apartment was wide awake by now. You however, didn’t really care about that. The two skeletons had brought you in without asking many questions, one look at you seemed to have shut them up completely. So you were sitting at their dining table-that seemed to have some burn marks as well as scratches of unknown nature-hunched over, your upper body practically draped onto the plate, your face buried in your arms and your hood hiding the rest of it fairly well. Your feet touched the floor just about a few notches, as the table seemed to be made for taller people. No wonder, considering that most of the monsters in the room were frikking titans compared to you! Even their voices were huge and impossible to be overheard. The second, they woke up and spotted you with the two brothers and their obvious concerned aura, all hell broke loose. You felt bad for disturbing them. They seemed to have had a sleepover of some sort, since a whole brigade of people were loitered around the flat. Heck, you didn’t even knew why you came here in the first place, you just knew that you were running and ended up here somewhere, when…  
No!  
No, you would not think about it. Not now. Later, a lot later.  
“…what do you mean, they were sleeping in front of your door, Papyrus?” a women hissed.  
“EXACTLY WHAT I TOLD YOU, UNDYNE!” He obviously _tried_ to whisper but failed miserably.  
“That doesn’t explain anything, Nerd!”  
“Heh, what did you expect us to do, show them the cold shoulder?”  
“This is not a time for puns Sans! And no, I don’t, it’s just… Are they even moving?”  
“Think so. They seem to be breathing…” The woman, called Undyne let out a small sigh.  
“And you are telling me they didn’t say a thing or moved an inch since you brought them in?”  
“MAYBE THEY ARE NAPPING AGAIN?”  
“Heh, I don’t think anyone can nap in that condition, bro. Not even this old lazybones here”  
“HNNNG, YOU SEEM TO BE RIGHT SANS, THEY DID LOOK KIND OF ODD.”  
“My, my, maybe we should try talking to the human, instead of whispering two feet behind their back, yes?” Oh, that voice belonged to that fuzzy goatmonster, you’ve met earlier, you remembered! Victoria? No, that’s not it… Something with Tori as shortening. Ugh, whatever.  
You could just about make out some affirmative mumbles before a soft hand-paw?-came to rest on your shoulder. You flinched as a reaction, barely holding in the pained hiss that tried to escape your throat. “I am sorry, my child, I did not mean to startle you. Are you alright? You gave everyone quite the scare when you appeared at the doorstep this morning.”  
“Uuuuuuh, Tori…” Sans interrupted here, his voice a little awkward. “I-I might… We might have forgotten to tell you something…” You let out a tiny sigh and turned just far enough so you could peak through your hair that still covered your face. Probably for the better.  
“I’m-I’m…” your voice cracked, your throat still sore from the night before. What were you even about to tell them?  “…fine?” _Well-fucking-done, Elaine, that totally sounded believable._  
“Fine looks different to me, kid” Sans muttered under his breath and you could see his brother nudging him with his elbow.  
“SANS!”  
“What, it’s true…” Well, he did have a point there, admittedly…  
“Yeah! No one just appears in front of someone’s house just like that!”  
“WEREN’T YOU DOING THIS JUST LAST WEEK AT FRISK’S, UNDYNE?”  
“Yeah, but we are BESTIES!”  
“Don’t listen to them, you don’t have to tell us, if you don’t want to or feel comfortable with, dear.” Tori’s-or whatever her name was-words were so inviting and kind, as if they were filling you with a warm fuzzy feeling. “We are just worried.”  
“No…” you mumbled, still kind of raspy. “They are right…” You picked up your torso from the table, head down, before you griped the seams of your hood with trembling hands, brushing it back. A big portion of your face was still covered by your now short, sloppily cut hair so you ran your fingers through them, forcing a tiny smile out of yourself. For a second it was dead-quiet in the room. You could see both Papyrus and Sans looking away in discomfort out of the corner of your eye. Tori let out a little gasp and covered her mouth. You couldn’t see this Undyne, everyone was talking to, as she stood right behind you and you’d have to turn around completely in order to, but hey, she couldn’t see your face either.  
The goatmonster in front of you was the first one to break the silence, her voice shaking with what you can only describe as a mixture of anger, sadness and disgust.  
“Would any of you be a doll and bring me some fresh band aids and painkillers from the bathroom? The little pink ones? And a disinfect? I know you have some at home.” You were surprised that she didn’t immediately try to force any details out of you but rather decided that it would be more important to patch you up. This action alone made you wince, which turned out to be a bad idea, as your aching body did not respond well to it.  
“I’ll go grab it!” You could hear Undyne opening and closing a door. Her steps seemed so determinded and harsh, almost like a solder would march. You imagined her as a very, very buff woman, with a nose that would have been broken multiple times ad a face that could only be loved by a mother. Or maybe you just watched too many action movies lately.  
“N-no, this wouldn’t be necessary, really!” You croaked and Tori sighed, before getting up.  
“Yes it is. Would you like a cup of coffee or tea, until Undyne returns? Your voice sounds like it could need something warm.” Just as you were about to decline you thought to yourself that that idea actually sounded lovely.  
“Tea please…” She flashed a kind smile and prepared a cup for both you and herself before putting it in front of you.  
“Be careful, it is very hot, young one.”  
“Thank you” you whisper, pulling the sleeves of your hoodie over your hands to protect them from the heat, as you grabbed the cup. “Not just for the tea.” A while no one said anything as you heard a lot of noise coming from one of the rooms and took a sip of your tea. You could see your reflection in the liquid and you had to admit, you looked worse than ever. Usually he spared your face, so it wouldn’t draw to much attention, but this time, he just went completely overboard. Your lip was split open and stained red, your left cheekbone was completely bruised and you could make out a cut, just above the bone where the skin would be thinnest. Another fresh bruise mangled with an older one on your temple on the other side, creeping up next to your eye. Another little bruise surrounded the gash on your nose, but it didn’t feel broken.  
You were used to looking like that-just not in that extend. What you were not used to, was your hair. The once beautiful, deep black curls that were reaching down to your waist were gone, cut off with a single swipe just a little above the shoulder. It wasn’t a clean cut and looked rather sloppy and ragged. But the worst part was that you did it yourself. For once, you were the one responsible for it. You could still feel it, scrambling to get away, when you were yanked back by your hair and getting dragged along the kitchen floor, kicking and screaming. For once you actually tried to fight back. You did not know, how you got a hold of the large trenchier-knife, but it felt cold in your hand as you sliced off your hair and starting to running. Of course you didn’t get far. You never got far. You shivered as you remembered the consequences of your actions. “I’m sorry I am barging in on you like that. Hell, you don’t even know me! It’s just…” you shrugged. “I had nowhere else to go when…” You would not be able to finish your sentence, since you could hear the kitchen door behind you crashing open, startling you, so the cup would slip out of your hand, shattering on the floor and spilling Tea everywhere.  
“TORIEL! I’ve found the things you wanted me to get for the human!” Undyne exclaimed. “Well, I couldn’t find the exact painkillers you wanted, so I just took ALL OF THEM!”  
You, however couldn’t concentrate on what they were saying, the sound of breaking glass filled your head and quickly you slid of the chair, hastily starting to pick up the pieces, ignoring the pain of the hot liquid and little cuts you got on your finger from the sharp glass.  
“Oh god, I am so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I… I just…” You couldn’t recall starting to shake as much as you did and only when a bony hand grabbed your wrist you stopped. In a total state of pure terror and shock you locked up at Sans, kneeling besides you.  
“Hey there buddy, easy! No need to hurt yourself more than you already are…”  
“Please, don’t…” The words slipped out of you so easily, that you couldn’t stop yourself from saying them. Seeing the facial-or rather skeletal-structures of the skull in front of you shifting into something both worried and… disbelieving, was rather interesting, almost intriguing. Bones couldn’t move, but both Skeleton brothers seemed to be just fine expressing their emotions. Yes, the shorter one always had a permanent grin on his face, but you could already make out some differences, like when it would become wider or strained.  
“Geee, kid, what did he do to you?” The pure shock and awe you experienced this exact moment could not be described, only one thing was on your mind.  
He knew.  
He knew exactly what was going on, and you couldn’t hide it from him. A shiver ran down your spine as you looked into his eye sockets that were illuminated by two small, white pinpricks of light.  
“Too much…” you whispered back and swallowed hard, unable to lie. His eyes seemed to flicker for just a second, before he helped you up again and placed you back on the chair. “Don’t worry. Tori will patch you up just fine. And we’ll worry about the... mess later, yes?”  
“Okay…”  
“He is right, my child. First we need to worry about you.” Toriel smiled at you gently as you heard Papyrus and the titanous Undyne whisper to each other again. “Are you… hurt.. somewhere else?” A red blush crept up your face as you nodded slowly. You considered declining, to not worry them further but everything just hurt so badly. She looked at you with anticipation before you started to pull down the zipper of your hoodie and shrugging it off, the stained material landing on the floor with a small thud.  
“WHAT THE F…”  
“Undyne, language. Paps is in here!” Sans growled at her. “Even though she’s right, that looks pretty nasty, kiddo.” Undyne was still holding in the swear as you could hear her still hissing a sharp FFFFF… Shame crept up your neck and face in form of a blush. That was the exact reason, why you never wore any short sleeved shirts. Your whole arms were covered with gashes and bruises, some of them resembling large hands like someone was grabbing you way too rough.  
“Uhm… There’s… There’s more though…” you squeaked.  
“MORE?” It was the first time that Papyrus spoke up, since you pulled off your hood and his voice was just filled with something that you could not identify. Quickly, you nodded. Toriel swallowed hard, her eyes a little watery.  
“I need you to show me, so I can help you.” She whispered and squeezed your hand. You only blushed harder.  
“Uhm…” The goatmonster scanned your face for a second, before it seemed to dawn upon her.  
“oh. OH. I see. Undyne, boys… Could you… give us a moment?”  
“WHY?” both Papyrus and Undyne shouted as you tried to disappear into your chair.  
“I’ll keep ‘em busy, don’t worry, Tori. Frisk and Alphys should be awake by now anyways.” Toriel thanked him and looked at you with a soft expression, before you turned around and took off your shirt. Your legs were bruised up as well, but that was just it. Bruises, which you were used to by now. Your back was, where the real party was.  
Suddenly you felt yourself being pulled into a warm hug, a single tear dropping down on your shoulder. Surprised you looked up at Toriel and blinked.  
“I am sorry, my child. You had to suffer so much, I just….” You gave her a tiny smile before patting her hand.  
“It’s alright…. I’m used to it…”

A mere hour later you found yourself at the kitchen table once again. You watched Toriel quietly, as she put away the medical equipment as you put your shirt back on. Your whole body still tingled, but in a good way. You’ve never experienced the magic monsters possessed first hand, only heard the stories, but admittedly, it felt pretty nice. Most of the smaller bruises were gone, just like the tiny cuts. The bigger ones were looking better, but just wouldn’t disappear. White bandages were covering your arms and a little patch was placed on your nose and cheekbone. Luckily, those were the only big bruises left on your face. And a tiny rest of the cut on your lip, it didn’t heal completely, but now it just looked like you were biting your lip a little bit too vigorously. Heh, this wasn’t half bad, you decided. The only things that were concerning you by now were the bruises around your neck, your thighs. Everything else would be fine. Your back was already covered in scars, so you didn’t mind a few more, damage was already done, so why care at this point.  
As you tried to pick up your sweater again, Toriel clicked her tongue disapprovingly and took it away from you.  
“Excuse me, dear, but I did not patch you up, so you could bring dirt and germs back into your disinfected wounds. Say here please, I will go and see, if one of the boys has something that will fit you.” She gently placed a hand on your head and smiled.  
“Wait, the boys? This isn’t your apartment?”  
“But why, no! Frisk and I live just a few minutes away. This is the house of Sans and Papyrus. It was a mere-though very lucky-coincidence that everyone was here last night.” You could feel a blush creep back up your face.  
“Oh… I see…” you mumbled and ran your fingers through your hair. It would need some time to get used to the new length. Toriel laughed again, as you pulled your legs up the chair to gently fold the under yourself before taking a careful sip of tea.  
“I will be right back, is this alright with you, my child?” You gave her a small nod, before she slipped through the door. Gee, you really didn’t think, that this wasn’t Toriel’s but now that you knew this, you noticed small missing details, like the absence of any female touches or the obviously scratched and burned table. The goatmonster did not look like she would appreciate something like that. Another thing that should have tipped you off, were the obvious paintings of bones you saw at the hallway. Of course the skeletonbrothers would have _a framed picture of a bone_. It was ridiculous enough.  
You were so caught up in your own thoughts that you almost missed the tiny creek of a door that was opened up carefully, like someone wanted to sneak in. You turned around and were greeted by a rather sleepy looking Frisk, their back pressed against the door. You gave them a small wave with your better looking hand and they returned it before dashing towards you, climbing on your lap without hesitation, like this was the most normal thing in the entire world. You let out a kind smile and ruffled their hair.  
“Hey there, Frisk. Guess I took that dinner invitation” Your voice was quiet yet warm. The child inspected your face closely with a pout before they started signing.  
_Undyne told me, you were here and that I need to be careful…. And then Papyrus asked me, to not disturb you, because you had got hurt. And Sans made a bad joke, but he looked worried too._  
You blinked surprised, considering your options for a few seconds before you answered.  
_Yeah, I’m sorry I ruined your party, Dear. I just.._  
You couldn’t sign fast enough before a tiny hand poked your good cheek.  
_Don’t be sorry. Did Mom heal you?_  
_Yeah, she tried_., you shrugged, _did what she could. Her tea’s pretty good as well._  
Frisk giggled a tiny bit and it was the most adorable sound you have ever heard in your life.  
_You should try her buttspie! It’s the best. Just… pass over the snails pie. That’s a weird one.  
I’ll remember it, yes? And, do I wanna know what buttspie is?  
It’s cinnamon-butterscotchpie. I love it, it’s so good. I could eat it for days but Mom won’t let me, she said humans need healthy food. But then she made cookies like 5 seconds later so I don’t know if I can trust her with that._  
You didn’t know how they did it, but this kid actually made you laugh, like, honest and genuinely laugh! Yet you stiffened instinctively, as you felt their fingers run along your neck, right were the big bruise was, before hugging you closely.  
_It’s going to be okay…  They’ll protect you from now on.  
_ Your breath was shaking as you exhaled and nodded barely noticeable. Frisk was still hugging you and you felt so comfortable, something you haven’t experienced in a long time. You stood up as careful as possible, picking up the small child in your arms on the way. They were so tiny and light as a feather. Frisk quickly wrapped their arms and legs around you, to hold on a little better as you smiled at them, your bare arms forgotten for the moment, as you walked towards the door they came in through. You pushed it open with your hip, all eyes turning to you as you carried in Frisk with a smile.  
“Uhm… I’m sorry, but I found Frisk. Or rather, they found me.” Papyrus flashed a big smile, as he walked towards you, taking the child from you.  
“THERE YOU ARE, TINY HUMAN! I SEE YOU MADE FRIENDS WITH THE NOT AS TINY HUMAN!” Frisk giggled and started signing, way too quickly for you to follow. “OH IS THAT SO? PLEASE TELL ME MORE!” You thought that the two of them looked adorable, almost like siblings. The extrovert personality of the taller skeleton made him extremely charming and he seemed to be very good with children.  
“Hey guys, I couldn’t find the Punk anywhere, maybe they are in the kitchen with… oh…” You jumped a little bit, as Undynes voice appeared right behind you. You guessed that she must have come out of one of the nearby rooms. A shriek exited your voice as you span around, tripping over your own feet and landing hard on your butt. Your eyes darted to Frisk and they giggled a tiny bit.  
_That’s Undyne. She’s cool, we are besties!  
_ THAT was Undyne? Yeah, of course, the voice was familiar but the picture in your head and real life did not match up. _Not. A. Bit._  
Sure, they were ridiculously tall-like almost everyone-and buff as hell but you did not expect her to be so… pretty. Or blue. Or a fish.  
And yet, here you were, on the floor and starring up at one of the most beautiful woman you have ever seen, as they flashed a toothy smile at you, showing of their fangs.  
“Oh. There you are! Sorry for scaring you, Nerd!”  
“Heh, seems like they are falling for you, Undyne…” Sans let out casually.  
“OH MY GOD SANS!” his brother shouted nut you couldn’t help yourself but starting to laugh.


	4. The price of bravery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which shit will start do just go down the drain....

Though it was cold, you felt oddly calm.

Frisk sat between your legs, eyes glued to the TV, as you were watching some stupid cartoons. The kid loved watching them and since everyone else seemed to be busy at the moment, you had to look out for them. To be honest, you were quite happy for the distraction though. Two days have passed since you quite literally fled from your home and came to the house of the skeleton brothers. They were kind enough to let you stay for now, as they clearly seemed worried. No one knew what happened to you-well, at least explicitly, Toriel has seen your broken and mangled body and surely put one and one together and Frisk, well, Frisk was special-and you weren’t really ready to tell anyone yet, but they surely knew that bad things have occurred to you.  
And they were so nice to you. Toriel and Frisk came by every day thus far, the child usually right after school and their Mom-which still confused you a little bit, since Frisk was human and Toriel… not, but that was none of your business-later, when it was time for dinner. Undyne dropped by once too, together with her girlfriend, an adorable yet very shy lizard, that seemed to be some sort of scientist. Sadly, you couldn’t remember her name, which was odd, since Undyne just wouldn’t _stop_ gushing over her. It was weird for you to see someone in a relationship that wasn’t… entirely wrong, where both seemed to just… adore each other!  
You loved the two of them, loved seeing them together, interact with each other, and stare at each other with this… look of pure and utter joy, to have each other. It warmed your heart, quite literally.  And lastly, the bone boys themselves. Papyrus was just such a dearie, constantly happy and excited, even though very loud, and always ready to cook you his “FAMOUS SPAGHETTI!” as he liked to call it. Sure, it did not taste very well, but it looked very pretty with all of that glitter on top and he just seemed so happy that you could not muster up the cruelty to burst his little bubble. Sans was very nice as well, more relaxed and laid back than his brother but he seemed to love making bad puns and you couldn’t help yourself but laugh at almost all of them. You adored bad humour like that so much.  
Yeah, you liked staying with the monsters, sure, but deep down you were scared. Scared that you would be found by…

A slight pat on your knee ripped you out of your thoughts and you blinked down at Frisk, who put their head back, to look at you. Your lips curled into a tiny smile as you wrapped your arms around the small body.  
“Sorry, I wasn’t looking. What did you say?”  
_Are you okay? Your eyes went blank…_ _Don’t you like the show?_ the child said and you frowned.  
“Nah, it’s alright, I just… got lost, don’t worry…”  
_Wanna watch something else?_ You shook your head slightly.  
“Nah, don’t bother...” Your chin came to rest on top of Frisks head, as they continued to watch their show and you felt your phone vibrate in your backpocket. A tiny sigh escaped your lips, as you pulled it out without looking. The number displayed on it was familiar to you and had called you trice already today, starting to annoy you, hence why you just pressed the mute button and threw it in between some pillows at the end of the couch, not having to look at it anymore. You just got it back from the service, luckily it just needed a new battery pack, as the fall damaged the old one. It was barely used for anything else than listening to music, so having it constantly buzzing threw you kinda off. You knew exactly, why it was buzzing and did not enjoy this, so you decided to just ignore it for as long as you could.

Bad mistake as it would turn out.

Not even two episodes later, a faint knock at the door caught your attention. You stretched yourself with a guttural sound escaping you as Frisk nuzzled closer.  
“Well, guess that’s your Mom picking you up… Shall we let her in?” The kid flashed a big grin and jumped off the couch faster than you could watch. A smile crept onto your face as you followed them out of the living room. As you crossed the kitchen, you heard the by now very familiar sound of shattering. Deciding to make a little detour until Toriel and her child would come back, you swung open the door, watching Papyrus cheerily stirring a pot of spaghetti-said noodles still in the box.  
“OH, HELLO SLIGHTLY LESS TINY HUMAN! ARE YOU AND FRISK DONE WITH YOUR SHOWS? WOULD YOU LIKE TO COOK WITH ME?” he exclaimed as enthusiastic as always. You simply nodded, stepping next to him, carefully freeing the noodles from their soaked prison and placing them back into the hot water. “I HEARED THE DOORBELL RING, WHO WAS IT?”  
“I think it was Toriel, she wanted to pick up Frisk and join us for dinner, remember?”  
“AH YES, SHE DID SAY THAT. IT IS AWEFULLY SOON THOUGH AND... YES TINY HUMAN; WHAT IS IT?” You turned around, your eyebrows knitting together as you watched Frisk gently patting the tall skeletons’ leg.  
_There’s a woman at the door. I don’t know her but_ she demanded _to see Laney!_  
Laney… No one has called you that in a very, very long time.  
“A… Woman…?”  
_Yeah…_  
You wiped your hands at your pants with a small sigh.  
“I’ll be back in a bit, I’m sure it’s nothing…”  
“ARE YOU SURE, HUMAN?”  
“Yeah, don’t worry… Besides, no one knows that…” You cleared your throat, to avoid saying more, yet your gaze flickered down, as you left the kitchen. An unknown uneasiness befell you, growing with every step you took until your chest felt heavy and gravel filled your stomach. One hand hovering over the handle, you swallowed one last time before slowly opening the front door.  
How?  
How did she find you?  
Nobody knew, nobody saw…  
And yet she stood right in front of you, as every last bit of colour left your face.  
“Rebecca…?” Her green eyes were glancing over you, appraisingly and clearly disapproving.  
“So, it is true… I didn’t want to believe it, but here I am, seeing it with my own eyes.”  
“what do you want here?” You were surprised by the sheer amount of coldness in your voice, but your opposite wouldn’t even flinch. She just shoved the strap of her Purse back up her shoulder before she proceeded to roughly grabbing your wrist, making you suck in a hissed breath, as fiery pain shot up your arm.  
“I am taking you home! I couldn’t believe my own ears when Hugh told me you ran off with some… some… monsters!” she spewed out the word with disgust, resulting in you experiencing a somewhat unknown faint hue of… rage? in your chest. “You are clearly out of your mind! I will take you back home to your boyfriend! So he can knock some sense back into you! Why would you give up such a perfect life of yours?” Her voice was barely more than a huff, as she stomped down the little gateway of the apartment, dragging you with her, just a few steps behind. You started struggling, but she ignored you.  
“Rebecca, let go of me!” Suddenly, she turned around, forcing your arm up, as pure shock and fear must have filled your face, quickly glancing back to the open door. “Or aren’t you here by your own will after all? Did they… Did they kidnap you? I’ve heard so many stories and…” She stopped in horror, as she felt the hot liquid moisten the palm of her hand, thick, dark red blood seeping through the sleeve of your Hoodie. Quickly she grabbed the fabric and pulled it up roughly. A silent scream escaped her full, lipstick-decorated lips. “Oh my God, Ellie! What did they do to you! Are you a hostage? Oh god, oh god, Oh god! I am calling the police right now!” There was it again, that tight grip around your chest, as you watched her pull out her phone in horror. An unknown impulse following, you grabbed her hand, effectively stopping her.  
“They didn’t do shit to me, Becca!” you hissed. “You claim to be my best friend-no, but sorry, that’s total bullshit right there!-and yet proceeded to overlook what was right before your very eyes! I am not coming with you! In fact, I am never going back to that place, not if I can prevent it!” You quickly rolled up both sleeves stretching out both arms, still wrapped in bandages. One of them was stained red, where she touched you to roughly, resulting in one of the very deep cuts to break open again. “You see what your precious, perfect little Hugh did to me? And now let go of me, so I can go back to my monsters! Because they have showed me more humanity that any of! Maybe you should think about, who’s the real monster here!”

The sound of skin meeting skin echoed through the complex. Your cheek was burning and you touched it perplex.  
“Listen here! I am taking you with me now, you are going home to your loving boyfriend and then I will call the police to lock these…things in there up for good, do you hear me!”  
“No! Let go of me!”  
“Don’t be stupid, Ellie! These are _monsters_! They are…”  
“Please…”  
“Now, what seems to be the problem here?” Never in your life have you felt as much relieve as in the exact second, Sans’ voice splashed over you. You shot him a helpless glance, as one of his bony hands grabbed the one still clenched around your wrist, drenched in blood.  
“Get your hands off me, you… _thing_!” Rebecca screeched, scooting away. A pained moan escaped you, as the sudden tug burned like SHIT! Her green eyes looked at you in terror, as the Skeleton sneaked one arm around your shoulder, almost protective. Usually, you hated it, when someone touched you but this gesture felt so… safe, so genuine and kind, that you leaned into it. “Ellie, come here!” she hissed and you couldn’t stop yourself from shaking. She was right. What were you trying to pull off here? You would never be able to escape.  
Just as you took one step, his words hit you like a train at full speed.  
“No…!” For the first time in a long time, you felt brave, like you could do something. There was a certain strength in you now, as you proceeded to walk, stopping right in front of the blonde. Your blood dripped to the floor with a small plop, every time a drop of blood busted on the concrete. “You are dead to me, _Becca_!” The barely audible hiss of her nickname, seemed to work like the crack of a whip, as she flinched heavily. “And I swear to god, if you tell _him_ , where I am…”  
“Oh honey… he already knows…” She chuckled. “How do you think I’ve found you?” And with that sentence, she managed to wipe away every last bit of sass you had inside of you. All out of a sudden, you felt so small again, compared to everyone. Of course he knew…  
You’d never be able to escape.  
Rebecca huffed out angrily, glaring at both you and Sans, before she disappeared without saying another word. The only sound you could hear was your own blood dribbling down your fingers.

 

Your mind has been empty ever since Rebecca left you. You couldn’t feel anything, neither the obvious pain you should experience from your throbbing wounds nor the gut-wrenching fear that took you over. You stood inside the living room, your fingers clutching your phone, just so you could hold onto something. Hugh knew where you are, he knew where you went to after you fled from your prison. How he did it, you had no idea. But this meant nothing good. And of course, the only nice people you knew were monsters, one of the things he hated most.  
As you started to think about, what consequences would have for these people, these wonderful, nice people, you couldn’t help yourself but starting to shake violently. You didn’t care about yourself anymore, not a bit, but there were some persons you just needed to keep safe.  
Your thoughts were racing, as you considered your options. Maybe your boyfriend-well, you wished that you could say ex, but at this point, you just weren’t sure-wouldn’t be so hard on you, if you’d return now. Maybe he would spare Toriel and Papyrus and Undyne and….everyone else if you’d just made peace with him and let him have his way with you again.  
_Mother…_ you thought. But you couldn’t. You couldn’t do that, you were too scared.  Well, not scared, you were _terrified_! There was no possible way, you could get out of this. You were so desperate, so alone…  
No, not entirely…  
One of your hand shifted up, to where your heart was positioned and you could feel it beating just under your skin.  
“Are you still there?” Your barely audible question echoed unusually loud in the small room, only to realise, that it actually resonated through your head. A tiny smile tugged at the corners of your mouth, as you felt the light _Plip_ , a small nudge against your hand, that felt like it would come directly from your heart. You calmed down in an instance, still smiling and with hope and determination returning to you.  
When the door behind you opened, you were still smiling, hand above your heart. Sans and Papyrus were peeking in and your smile grew a little bit.  
“Heya. Just… Checking up on you. You, uh… had a pretty rough evening there…”  
“ARE YOU ALRIGHT, SHORT HUMAN?”  
“Yes, don’t worry, boys, I am just fine.” You glanced down at your freshly bandaged wrist and chuckled. “Nothing that won’t heal over time. But thank you for looking after me…” Your eyes locked with Sans’ when you said that, as you still felt unable to express your feelings for him stepping in.  
“Ah, forgeddaboud it, kiddo!” The shorter skeleton gave you a wink and you chuckled.  
“WILL YOU BE OKAY FOR THE NIGHT, HUMAN?” Oh, Papyrus was just such a sweetheart always worried and seemingly on a quest to make everyone happy. How did he not get swallowed by this world yet? Well, looking at his brother, you could only guess that he kept him safe…. Like he did with you today. In a flash, you remembered the words he said to you, as Rebecca and you had your little… well, conversation and found yourself thinking _Yes, Yes, he definitely kept his brother away from all the evil and bad things in the wold!_  
“Yes, everything is okay, Papyrus. I am sorry that I am taking up your couch like that.”  
“OH, DON’T WORRY! YOU SAVED FRISK, SO YOU MUST BE A NICE PERSON AND OUR FRIEND! THIS IS JUST LIKE A BIG SLEEPOVER AND I AM GLAD TO HAVE A FRIEND OVER!”  
“Yeah, you are right. This really is fun, hanging out with you guys! If you want to, we can…” You couldn’t tell him what you were about to say, as your phone in your pocket started to buzz violently. A quick glance at the display made your heart sink to the stomach.  
“I’m sorry, it’s important….” You mumbled as you turned around to accept the call. “H-Hello?”  
_No, no, no, no…. Not now! Please, no.. Everything but this!_  
Your phone met the ground with an almost ridiculously lout sound, your hand still raised to your ear.  
You couldn’t even shake, couldn’t hear the concerned voices of the skeletons, couldn’t feel the tight grip of bony hands on your shoulder, it was just too much, pushing you over the edge. Whoever’s grip it was, should have hurt or at least made you flinch but you couldn’t even feel that one.  
Everything felt empty inside of you.  
Empty and cold.  
“Excuse me…. I have something to do….” Your voice couldn’t even be considered a mumble, as you just walked to the hallway, your hollow eyes glued to the floor but not really processing anything. You tried to ignore the overly worried voices as well as the silent scream inside of you.  
This was your fault, everything was your fault.  
It should have been ridiculous to think about something like that in such a moment, but your mind wandered back to Sans’s Words again. You really wanted to believe him, you wanted to believe him so much, but it was just so fucking hard to believe anything at this point.   
You felt like falling down....

_“Don’t worry… I promise to keep you safe!”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, yeah, the next chapter WILL BE very hard to read as well as very hard to write for me. It's also going to be very long, since a lot of shit's going on, promise! We will also find out something about Elaine (well, A LOT tbh) Just... Be prepared, okay? I'll try my best to get it out to you as fast as possible!


	5. Darker, yet darker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very long, very hard chapter about shit just going down  
> And the first glance of hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \---W A R N I N G---  
> Added some new tags  
> This chapter is really really hard to read, and it was kinda hard to write as well (some of that stuff happened to me as well, so yeah, maybe I'm just tryin to deal with it here, so please forgive me.)  
> So, just a fair warning, but I promise, it will get better! A lot better!

Coldness. Coldness and Emptiness.  
That was all you could feel right now. Nothing more, nothing less. The whole world appeared muted down, your gaze blank and cloudy. You couldn’t even feel your own heartbeat. It was just… gone… In a matter of seconds.  
You should be used to this but right now, it hit you twice as hard, mixed with guilt and the pure state of shock you found yourself in. It was such a familiar feeling, but instead of getting easier it just gets harder every repeat, as if you were set back in time. Only that you had no more tears left this time, no heart that could break. There was only darkness inside of you now, held together by what little light was left, even if it wasn’t yours. And then everything happened way to fast. And at the same time…

Not fast enough.

Your eyes were locked to the front door, you had to get out of here, as soon as possible. Weird, how heavy your usually light steps felt but how unable you saw yourself at the same time to even feel the usually fuzzy and warm carpet under your feet.  
“HUMAN? WHERE ARE YOU GOING?” Oh no… Papyrus’ voice seemed so far away right now, you couldn’t even listen to him.  “HUMAN? IS EVERYTHING ALRIGHT?” Was he coming closer? He must be…  
“Don’t worry, Papyrus….” It would be borderline miracle if he could hear you, but you had no control of the words that were leaving your mouth anymore. A surprisingly large hand grabbed your biceps gently but stern enough to make you stop, just before you could reach the door. Surprised, your eyes gazed up to the tall skeleton, a mellow smile on your lips.  
“H-HUMAN?”  
“It’s alright Papy… I am _fine_. I’ll be back soon…” You should have been surprised that a skull could have so many facial expressions, but your brain wasn’t exactly working right now, hence why you only patted the gloved hand on your arm, as he knitted his brow….bone?... together. His eyes darted over your significantly smaller body.  
“NO…..YOU WON’T…” His words were kind and surprisingly calm, but this hit you more that if he would have been screaming, making you flinch and blink in surprise.  
“W-What…?”  
“YOU WON’T BE BACK. I HAVE SEEN THIS LOOK IN YOUR EYES BEFORE. MY BROTHER HAD THE SAME ONE FOR A VERY LONG TIME BACK UNDERGROUND. AND FOR QUITE A WHILE WHEN WE CAME ABOVE GROUND. HE THINKS I NEVER NOTICED BUT I DID, I DID NOTICE THE ANXCIETY AND THE CONCERNES BEFALLING HIM, THE MANY TIMES HE WOKE UP FROM HIS NIGHTMARES. THAT IS WHY I TRIED TO BE THE BEST BROTHER I CAN BE. BECAUSE I LOVE SANS VERY MUCH, HE DESERVES NOTHING BUT THE BEST. AND NOW I RECOGNISE THIS EXACT SAME EXPRESSION IN YOUR EYES! I WORRY GRAVELY ABOUT YOU, SMALL HUMAN!”  
You tried. You really did, very hard even. But it was just so damn impossible to close your mouth after what he said. He… You never thought, that he could just… look right through you. No one before was able to do such a thing. Without noticing you raised your hand, touching your collarbone, almost like you were looking for something, a necklace or collar that could give you security.  
A golden heartshaped locket….. Best friends forever sloppily engraved on the inside with pictures of…. Pictures of what? But that was just ridiculous, you’ve never worn a necklace, didn’t like them. Like they didn’t belong there.  
You smiled at him gently once again, before taking a step back, clearly catching him off-guard.  
“Thank you for your worries. But I promise… Everything will be fine… I’ll set things right, I promise!”  
And before he could protest again, you were out of the door, leaving behind a truly rattled skeleton. For a second, he considered following you, before the door behind him opened, showing a really, really disturbed looking Sans, his phalange still clutching your phone.  
“Elaine… Where is she…?”  
“SHE UHM… SHE JUST LEFT! I TRIED VERY HARD TO STOP HER, BUT I COULDN’T DO IT. I AM SORRY!” The shorter brother sighed deeply.  
“No, you did fine, Paps… We’ll just need to find her.” Sans raised her telephone a bit. “T’was the hospital. Her mother… Something happened to her…”  
“SOMETHING BAD?”  
“Yeah, pretty bad…” The smaller skeleton avoided his eyes, pulling out his own phone. “I’m calling the others, hopefully they can help us.”  
“YES, THAT IS A VERY GOOD IDEA, SANS! LET’S GO THEN!” Sans only nodded, as his brother ran out the door, starting to call everybody. He looked down at the phone and considered leaving it behind for a second but for some reason, he still let it slip inside of his pocket with a deep sigh before following Papyrus.  
“Wait  Paps, don’t run up ahead!”

“Have you found her yet?” Undynes voice sounded husk and a little out of breath, as if she was running.  
“Nah, I left Papyrus with Tori and the kid, I can cover more ground on my own…” Sans said while stepping through one of his shortcuts. The fishlady on the other line groaned frustrated, as she could hear the screeching sound of the telephone, trying to adapt to the sudden change.  
“Damn it Sans, you know that I hate it when you do shit like that!”  
“Sorry, it’s just faster…”  
“I know, just gimme a warning, Punk!” She fell silent for a second, before she spoke up again, a lot quieter this time. “This is bad, right? Like… REALLY bad?”  
“Yeah… Man, you shoudda seen it, Undyne, her face went… I’ve never seen eyes that were so blank and empty like that before. She was still smiling though. And I could swear, that her soul….”  
“Yeah, Nerd’s got a pretty weird soul, let’s be honest here. Maybe Alphy should look at it later, once we find her…”  
“Might be a good idea. But first we’ll need to find her!”  
“Yeah, yeah, I know! It’s just a matter of time.” He wasn’t so sure about that one, yet just as he was about to say anything, he felt a slight vibration in his pocket.  
“Hold up, Undyne, got another call.”  
“Alright, Sans. Gimme a ring if something’s changing.” He didn’t answer her, but pulled out Elaines phone, that was still ringing. It was an unknown number, but he pressed the accept call button anyways.  
“Hello…?” It was silent on the other side, except for the faint sound of breathing and a train rattling by. “Who’s there?”  
“I’m sorry. Please don’t look for me anymore. I know you are right now.”  
“Elaine? Where are you?”  
“It’s alright, Sans…” Never has he heard a voice that sounded so calm, yet so desperate. It sent shivers down his spine, and not the good kind of shivers.  
“Hey, talk to me kiddo, what’s going on? I.. I talked to the hospital, everyone’s looking for you.” It was quiet again for a second.  
“Just give up. I did”  
And his world froze for just a second as he heard the words he himself spoke not too long ago. He knew exactly what this meant.  
“Elaine. Stay exactly where you are. I am coming to pick you up right now!” But he didn’t get an answer, just the faint background sounds and a train rattling by. It felt like something griped his heart, squeezing it just a little too tight. Her silence hit him harder than… a train.  
Within the matter of seconds he took another shortcut, holding onto a loose thread of hope.  
“Elaine?” His words echoed through the night and back at him through the cell phone, as he looked at the abandoned telephone booth, the receiver calmly swinging back and forth, back and forth. Back. And forth.  
She couldn’t be far now.  
His pace sped up a little bit, as he ran towards the end of the bridge, just ahead of where he was standing.  
He could see you now, standing at the edge and looking down into the abys below, the wind ruffling your short, messy black hair. Another train drove by.  
“You shouldn’t have come Sans…” It drove him mad. You still had that smile on your face and it made him so mad, without even knowing why.  
“Oh, I came just at the right moment. Step away from the ledge, kiddo!” You didn’t answer him, had no more words left, just a cool serenity. “Everyone is really worried. Especially Frisk. Kid almost started crying when we started looking for you. They like you a lot.” Slowly, he inched closer, not trying to startle you or pushing you over the edge-quite literally. “Kid’s always been very special, they have a pretty good sense when it comes to people. They must see something in you, that’s worth S A V I N G” His words seemed to stir something inside of you, as one of the fragile hands jolted up, right where a human soul would usually lie.  
“That’s impossible…”  
“Yeah, I thought about that too, when I first met them. But ya know, kid’s special. Not everyone can do what they did. So I trust their judgment. So why won’t you come down from up there and we’ll try to fix this?”

_Do it… You can just tell him everything… They want to help you, they want to help US…._

The small voice inside you grew louder and louder by the second, just like before when they got you to pick up the phone. God, you were so scared, so, so scared. Where you doomed to fail at everything? You couldn’t even end it properly. It would just take a single step forward, just… a slip, and you could escape everything. There was no one left to grieve you. Yes, there would be some people, not a few and you could count them on one hand, that would be a little bit sad, but they would get over it in…. what? T-5 minutes? There was only one reason to keep fighting now and it was your fault, that this reason was trapped. So why not setting everything right?  
Was it so wrong to just asking for peace? Finally?

 **_Someone_ ** _would grieve you…_

God, it felt so dark, so heavy, your lungs refused to work, just like your mind. The uneasy, constricting feeling around your heart returned. You didn’t want to leave them, you were just so scared. Your red eyes darted to Sans, holding out one skeletal hand.  
You didn’t want to take his hand, you really didn’t. But at this moment right here, you weren’t the one in control, so you did it. You were pulled into a tight hug, keeping you from refusing the help you just allowed yourself to get.  
“It’s alright, kiddo. Said, I’d keep you safe, right? Nothings gonna hurt you anymore.”  
And then you broke down. Just… complete meltdown. You dropped on your knees, the bony arms still wrapped around you and for the first time since… since the accident, your eyes started watering, until it spilled over. Years of pain and sadness were coming back now, as you cried in the arms of a skeleton, you just met a few days ago and already saved you more times than he should.  
“Hey, it’s alright, pal, I got you. I got you…”  
“I was so scared. I still am. I don’t know what to do, I am at such a dark place. Mom… She.. He.. She’s gone, isn’t she? She is gone and it’s my fault!”  
“I am so sorry. Elaine. They… Her heart just stopped. It’s not your fault!” His hands rubbed your back as you looked up to him with glossy eyes.  
“You can’t say that… “ He took a deep sigh, as he pulled out his phone dialling. “What are you doing?”  
“Calling the others… And then I’ll take you somewhere nicer so we can continue this conversation. If you wanna talk of course…”  
“No, I really don’t wanna…”

_TELL! HIM!_

The voice inside of you was stronger now, almost screaming at you. Why are you resisting, what were you so afraid of? You knew very well, what was scaring you so much.  
The truth.

 

You carefully plopped your head onto your knees, starring at the calm nightsky above you. Hours must have went by, Sans sitting next to you, just watching and waiting for you to open up a little. He wouldn’t admit it openly, but you gave him a real scare back there, when he found you. Life must have been really harsh on you, to push you this far. Your fingers gripped the edges of his coat, he had put around your shoulders some time ago, harshly, still not speaking up. Luckily, both of your phones had stopped buzzing some time ago, thanks to Sans explaining, that he in fact, had found you, but would come home with you later as you seemed to need some time.  
“I’m gonna miss her…” Your voice was so quiet, so small. If he weren’t for him listening so closely, he’d surely missed it. “I haven’t spoken to her, since… since then, but I still hoped, that she would one day wake up…”  
“What happened?” You bit your lip so hard, you could actually hear your skin pop.  
“I… My family… We were in an accident.” Slowly, your fingers started tracing around the ground. “I just graduated and we wanted to..” Your brows knitted together, as you tried to unearth memories that were hidden so deep inside of you. “I can’t remember, everything is so blurry… but we wanted to drive somewhere, all four of us…”  
“Four?” Sans seemed surprised and a gentle smile tugged on your lips.  
“Yes, four. Mom, Dad, me and my sister, Elizabeth… Damn, I loved them so much. Especially my sister. She was two years younger than me, almost three, and I was…” A faint laugh escaped you. “I was such an overprotective big sister. I remember, that there was this boy that dared to break her little heart so I went to teach him a lesion. Stared at him until he started crying in front of the whole school. T’was pretty funny. No one would mess with my little muffin, I would protect her. I’ve always been a freak thanks to…them” you vaguely gestured to your eyes. “But I put it to good use when it came to stuff like that. Everybody loved her. So, when she died, everyone was devastated.”  
“How did it happen?” The skeletons voice sounded bleak and rough, avoiding your look.  
“I don’t know. I just remember that there was this drunk driver. He crashed into our car. Next thing I know is that I woke up at the hospital. The nurses told me, that my dad died right there and the rest of us... I shouldn’t be alive, I was pretty fucked up. Beth was still fighting, but Mom was stable. So I went to see my sister…. And watched her die right in front of me. It was just too much for her, she’s always been such a feeble and fragile child. I couldn’t protect her. There isn’t a single day, where I don’t think about it, how it should have been me. That I should have died back there and not she. Not my precious, beautiful, little flower.” A single drop landed on the back of your hand, and you watched it with great interest as you continued forth. “I was devastated. Like… I still remember it so well, the feeling of my.. heart, actually breaking and shattering into little pieces right there. Must have passed out or so, because the next second, all there was, was…. Darkness. An eternal void with nothing but an empty darkness. It’s burned into my brain.That’s where…”  
  
_Please. Don’t._

You blinked surprised, as your heart made little jump. You’d never get used to that.  
“Uuuuh, yeah, that’s where I… got stuck, for a long time. I was so alone and scared, didn’t knew what was going on. So I started running, until my legs couldn’t carry me anymore, Screamed, until my screams shouted back at me. It was like… I was melting right there and getting pieced together again, may mind showing me my sister, and what happened and how it could have ended, how it should, what could have been and never was and how it was right now. Over. And over. And over, until I couldn’t tell what’s real and what wasn’t. I don’t know how I escaped this… this void of emptiness…”

_Liar._

“…but I did. I did and woke up again. Almost three months later. Oh god, you can’t even imagine, how confused I was. I couldn’t tell, which reality was the one I was in right now, after… getting stuck. I swear, I would not have made it, if I were alone. So, bit by it, I pieced everything back together. Took me quite a while. My sister and Father were dead, I was supposed to be, they really thought I’d be a gonner… Hell, I thought, that I was a gonner, doomed to stay at the void or purgatory or whatever the fuck that was forever. Mom was still fighting tho. She’s always been the strongest. And that’s where the really bad shit started to happen…” A shiver ran down your spine. Oh yes, bad memories ahead. “Hugh got a hold of the fact that I had woken up. We went to school together. I never liked him, he was always that stuck up grease ball, you know? That rich kid of some really important politician mommy and daddy. He always tried to hook up with me, told me, he just _loved_ people, which are special. I was never interested. Heck, I hated his stupid stuck up personality. Heck, it’s not really hard to make me like someone, I am not very demanding. Crack up a few jokes, get me chocolate and let me watch some stupid movies on your couch and you can be my best friend. Not Hugh though, he drove me… crazy. Maybe because he was a pretentious little prick, hooking up with almost every girl he could lay his eyes upon, bribing teachers so he’d pass as an A student and some shit like that. Okay, there was one time, I went out with him, but just because he tried to get into Beths pants. Well, it wasn’t a long date, I left after 15 minutes, when he preferred to start making out with the girl next to us at the cinema.” You frowned at the memory of it, quickly shaking your head, determined to continue your rambling. “However, he came to visit me at the hospital. I think he paid a nurse so he can see me. It had to be like that, they would nobody get to me, not even my best friend. He scared me. He hadn’t even said anything, just stood there. I can remember that one so vividly. After all, that was the day I signed a contract with the devil. He would just sit there for the longest time, watching me. I just begged for him to say anything at all, so he would stop looking at me in that way. Well, once he did, I wanted him to stop. He started to tell me all the details about how Dad and Lizzy-well, Beth, sorry-died, how everyone thought, that I was on the brink of death as well. It’s funny, I didn’t cry at all. Almost like I had lost all of my tears. Then he told me about Mom. That she was in a coma, still alive but… sleeping.” A strained smile appeared on your face as you gripped the fabric of your pants harshly.  
“She had fallen down…” Sans muttered and you looked at him.  
“What?” Surprised, he jolted a bit, flashing an apologetic smile.  
“That’s uh… What we call it. When a monster gets hurt, they fall down. It’s like you said, they appear to be sleeping but they are about to die. It rarely happens that they wake up again. There are some cases, when we get hurt really badly, that we will turn into dust right away. But that only happens if the death isn’t natural….” Before you’ve met the skeleton and his friends, you had never thought much about monsters. Why? This was really interesting, they were so different from humans, yet so similar.  
“Well, yes, I guess, you could compare it to that. Anyways… Hugh started to tell me, how much it would cost me to cover all of the medical bills. Mine, Moms, the ones for Dad and Lizzy…. I was just some 18 year old girl, about to start college, without a job, a home, family. How in the heavens was I supposed to do this? It was almost impossible. And if I couldn’t pay the bills, they would turn off the machines, which kept Mom alive. I wanted to scream so badly. I couldn’t just let her die, but I couldn’t afford it. Not even if I sold all of my organs-which I actually thought about at that moment!-or whatever… And that’s when he offered me a deal.”  
“A… Deal?”  
“Yeah.” You hugged your knees a bit harsher, looking away. “Hugh told me, that he would pay for all of my expenses, keeping mom alive, paying for college et cetera, et cetera… If I’d agree to become his girlfriend. He’s always been a collector of the rare and he liked to be praised as a hero. So, why not take in your girlfriend, dramatically rescuing her, saving her beloved mother and caring for her…” A harsh, short laugh crawled its way out of your throat. “And oh boy, what a collector’s piece I was. A girl with red eyes, that literally died and came back to life. I’d be the perfect pretend-to-be-wife. I hated him, I hated him so much… But I wanted my Mom to have a chance. So I accepted. At the beginning, everything started out okay… His parents liked me a lot, he introduced me to his friends, I moved in… But soon, he’d grow bored with the _act_. I wouldn’t kiss him, let him touch me, even sleep in the same room with him-if I slept. And then… just a mere month later… Shit went down the drain.”  
“You don’t have to talk about it…” Sans voice was so calm and caring, empathy lingered within. Absentmindedly, you started to rub your hands.  
“I have pretty weird hands, you know?” A glance towards Sans showed you, how he knitted his browbone together in confusion.  
“You… do?”  
“Yes! Just look at them. There are so many faded scars that I have gained through different sections of my life…” The skeleton next to you shuffled a little bit, scooting closer. One of his boney fingers swept over a small, white line on your right hand. He figured, that this was your special kind of way, to tell him your story.  
“Where did you get that?” A gentle smile appeared on your face.  
“I was a child, and played to rough. Fell down and scraped my knuckles…” His hand gripped yours a little bit firmer as he continued gliding over the sensitive skin.  
“And that one?”  
“Paper cut.” And continued further.  
“That one?”  
“Needles. Scratched myself…” And further. “Knife, sister dropped one and I caught it.” And further… “My teacher burned me with an iron, she almost started crying. I didn’t mind.” And further… “Slipped whit the scissors while wrapping gifts.” Just a bit further… “Friends cat got a bit frisky…”

Too far!

His hands reached your wrist, where the ugly scars started. Some were older than others.  
 “What happened here?” Sans voice was husky and rough. You couldn’t even look him in the face.  
“Got that one, when he first hit me, because I came home late” He touched another one. “When he decided that I could neither major nor minor what I wanted but should take up quantum physics instead, because the fine arts are for stupid people.” The bony digits rolled up a bit of your sleeve, revealing more scars. “When he stopped me from eating because I was getting too fat, with my astonishing 99lbs.” He didn’t even ask anymore, just gently caressing the scars you gave yourself. “When he forbid me to see my best friend, because wasn’t a good influence. She could smell the bullshit 50 miles against the wind and he didn’t like that” Another one “When he threatened to stop paying for moms meds, effectively getting her machines turned off and killing her” He stopped at an especially deep one. “Got that one after the first time he raped me…” Your voice was barely audible but he must have heard it, as his head snapped up in surprise, the hollows of his eyes completely empty and black.  
“What?”  
“I wouldn’t let him touch me. He got fed up with it, so he just took what he wanted. I was too weak, to fight back, too scared. I tried telling someone what he did. They would just laugh and congratulate me, as this seemed to be something, couples should do. And so he did it again. And again. And again. Until I stopped fighting, just hoping for it to finally stop, begging quietly, that he would accidently kill me one day, in one of his rage attacks. But he never did. He was very careful. And I was his plaything, unable to do anything.” You felt the warm embrace at your heart and around your shoulders, almost like someone was hugging you close from behind. The voice inside of you didn’t say anything, but oh, did she want to. There were so many things the voice wanted to tell you but couldn’t. She was just as powerless as you were. “Then… I met you guys. He got so angry, that I even dared to talk to monsters. I think this time, he would have killed me. The scenario I hoped for so long finally came, and… something happened. I started fighting again. And ran. I ran until I ended up with you. But he found me again and now I need to pay…” The warm embrace grew stronger and to your surprise, another one was added, as Sans pulled you into a tight hug. It should have been uncomfortable, as you were so scared of being touched, but it wasn’t. It was comforting and you felt…  
safe? Yes, safe, that was it! Painfully slowly, you reached out to snake your arms around his body, reciprocating the kind gesture, almost clinging to the skeletal body, as an unexpected sob escaped you again.  
“I am usually not the one to make promises, but I will promise you something now. I’ll never _ever_ let this man get near you again, I will never let him hurt you again! I promise, okay?” You couldn’t answer him, so you just nodded, as more sobs and cries were falling from your lips, just like the tears streaming down your face.

_I told you that night, I would get you somewhere safe…._

You nodded again, unable to do something. Sans leaned away from you, gently smiling, as he wiped away the tears with his thumb.  
“Now, let’s get home and let everyone know that you are okay, yes?” You tried to answer him, but your throat was too dry to get anything out so you just let him pull you too your feet. “I’d recommend holding on tight, don’t want you to get lost on the way back”  
“What…” You couldn’t even finish forming the question, as you felt the earth underneath you being pulled away, your vision effectively blurring. You did the only thing you could, getting dizzy as fuck and holding on tight to Sans. And then it was over, just like that. Confused, you looked around. “What?” Okay, you must have blacked out, there was no other explanation _how_ else you ended up in the living room of Sans’ and Papyrus’ home that fast. “What?” you asked again, and suddenly, you were pulled into the tight-yet very familiar-embrace of The Great Papyrus.  
“TINY HUMAN! I AM GLAD THAT YOU ARE BACK, EVERYONE WAS SO WORRIED! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?”  
“Air, Papy, gotta breathe…” you gasped and he put you back on the floor. “Yeah, I’m…” not fine, not again, don’t you dare say fine again, Elaine! “fine…” God damn it, you stupid Fuck! “Well, okay, I’m okay! Sans found me, so please don’t worry. I have to admit though, I am glad to be back!”  
“OF COURSE YOU ARE! IT IS ALWAYS NICE TO BE WITH FRIENDS! NOW, WOULD YOU LIKE A PLATE OF WELCOME-HOME-SPAGHETTI?”  
“No, thank you very much Papyrus, maybe a bit later.” You yawned quietly, rubbing your eyes before you resumed talking. “I am very tired right now.”  
“SURELY YOU ARE, SMALL HUMAN, IT HAS BEEN A LONG DAY!” You watched the brothers leaving the room and fear started building inside of you. No, no, no, please don’t go. Stay! Your hand shot forward and gripped Sans wrist. Surprised he stared at you.  
“You okay, pal?”  
“I don’t wanna be alone… I’m scared.” It was borderline miracle that they could hear the words you squeezed out, your cheeks burning in embarrassment.  
“THEN WE SHALL HAVE A SLEEPOVER, HUMAN, SO YOU WON’T BE SCARED ANYMORE! THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND HIS BROTHER WILL KEEP YOU SAFE!” His words made you smile a bit, as you followed the boys, still not letting go. Everyone changed into their sleeping attire, before going to bed. Sans pulled you into a tight hug, your face buried at his chest and Papyrus hugged you from behind. “GOOD NIGHT SANS; GOOD NIGHT TINY HUMAN!”  
“Night Bro!” You could feel the vibrations of Sans voice at his ribs while he spoke and you found yourself fascinated again.  
“Sleep well, Papy.” And a bit quieter. “I am not tiny…” the shorter skeleton started chuckling in his deep baritone, that made you blush again.  
“Yes, you are.” You looked up at him grinning down, effectively pouting and playfully slapping his arm before nestling back to your comfortable position. You felt so safe nestled between the brothers, so warm and loved. Suddenly, you remembered this feeling, it wasn’t something you felt in a long time.  
It was the feeling of home, and a family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry ._. Poor Laney, lets get her some nice, fluffy stuff in the next chapters 
> 
> Just realised that yesterday I genuinely smiled again for the first time in forever. Guess things are getting better. If anything’s troubling you, just know that everything’s going to be alright and people care about you. I care about you and I'm here if you need someone to talk <3


	6. Pieces falling into place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit starts to go...well, okay-ish?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the song later on tho, I recommend listening to it, while reading, but its not a must.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oM-NCBZMZms  
> Have fun, little fluffnuggets

_He will be mad!_

I know

_He will hurt you again_

I know

_I hate it when he hurts you_

….

_He is back_

….

_And angry_

….

_He is tearing you apart!_

….

_You are scared_

….

_You are marred_

….

_I hate him_

….

_I hate him so much_

….

_He is hurting you_

….

_Again. And again. And again…._

….

_I won’t let him do this anymore!_

I know

 

Your eyes flew open and for just a second, you felt panic boiling inside of you as you stared at the ceiling with empty eyes. These weren’t your walls, this wasn’t your bed, and this wasn’t your bedroom.  
What? What was going on? Why could you feel someone hug you closely? Hugh never hugged you? He only took what he wanted, never more? Who…?  
It took you a few seconds, to realise, that your boyfriend-well, former boyfriend-wasn’t anywhere near, as far as you knew. This was the Apartment of Sans and Papyrus, two skeleton monsters, you just met but showed you more kindness than any other living creature in the past few years. You were safe, it was just a bad dream. Nothing could harm you anymore.  
It was almost like a mantra. You couldn’t remember how many times you had said something like that, the past few days, every time, you could feel it slip, just to pull it back.  
You were with Sans and Papyrus.  
You were safe  
Hugh would never hurt you again  
_He_ was not here  
_They_ were.  
And that made all the difference now.  
You still were in the exact same position, that you fell asleep in after last night, when you… After last night. Papyrus hugging you from behind, Sans nuzzling closely against your front, your legs entangled with theirs. The taller brother snored into your ear while the smaller one drooled a little bit. Dang, they were so adorable. It felt good, warm, but a good warm. There were your… Friends? Could you call them friends?  
You could try.  
A shiver ran down your spine as you remembered the nightmare you were having last night. Oblivion, you wished for nothing more, than to forget. But since you didn’t have one of those lightning-thingies from Man in Black, that just erases your memory, you had to deal with it.  
You wriggled out of the tight embrace of the brothers as carefully as you could, to not wake them up. Luckily enough, you were small and thin, so slipping out of bed wasn’t the hardest thing to do. Your skin felt like bugs were crawling underneath it as you rubbed your arms. Tiptoeing out of the room and into the living room, you started to scratch at your wrist nervously. It was a bad habit of yours that only got worse as time went by. Your nails still du into the skin of your left hand, as you sat down on the couch, watching the sun rise. Your phone was carefully placed at the table, Sans must have put it there. You really needed to thank him and his brother later. They did so much for you, even though they did not know you very well. Hell, you could be some kind of Axe Murderer for all they knew. Monsters were weird, but a good weird. Humans were just weird. They-

_Stop it!_

 

 

When Sans woke up, he had a somewhat similar experience than you, just for different reasons.

Panic.

Because you were gone. He jolted up, the white pinpricks in his eyesockets darting around the room, looking for a trace of your fragile appearance. Papyrus was still fast asleep, clutching the pillow and snoring. Any other time, the sight would have warmed his very soul, but right now, it didn’t.  
Darn it, you promised him to not run off again. How did you even manage to slip off? He should have noticed the sudden disappearance of your human soul. Grumbling a bit, the skeleton got out of Papyrus’ bedroom, careful to not wake him. Rubbing the base of his skull, he thought about where you could have gone. Maybe you left a note this time or called again.  
Man, this was bad.  
Sans suddenly came to a halt, when he got to the hallway that connected the living room with the bedrooms. He might not have a nose but he could still smell the familiar scent of food coming from the kitchen. If he had brows, they would have knitted together, as he followed the smell and the quiet sounds of the radio that appeared to be turned on.  
“What the…?” His fuzzy slippers barely made a sound as he scouted closer through the living room. An empty cup was placed on the table in front of the TV, the cushions visibly disturbed. The door to the kitchen was just about opened, so he would stop and lean to the doorframe, a tiny smile creeping onto his features. Okay, he really did not expect that one.  
He expected you to be gone or worse, but sure as heck not, to see you standing at the oven, back to the door, and flipping a pancake as you sang along to the song on the radio.  
The sight completely rattled him as it appeared so loving and domicile, like this was _how it’s supposed to be_ , but he couldn’t say _why_. It just felt right.  
I couldn’t be due to the resets, he would have definitely remembered this.  
‘nother thing he would have remembered and that felt right, was the fact the you were wearing his clothes, well, partially. His hoodie to be exact. It was at least 20 sizes too big for the delicate body it was wrapped around and definitely way to long, reaching down to the middle of your thighs, even a bit more. Made it really hard to tell if you were wearing pants as well or nah.  
Your voice stirred something inside of him as well, as if all of the emotions it was filled with were hitting his S O U L right at its core. What a weird feeling….  
“You’re up early, kiddo…” You jolted a bit, almost dropping the spatula in the process, whipping around to stare at him.  
“Jesus fucking Christ on a bike, Sans, don’t scare me like that when I am at the oven!” The skeleton only giggled as you glared at him.  
“Sorry, didn’t want to rattle your bones!” he winked and you mad a sassy glancing face, Toriel would be so proud of. “Though you gave me quite the scare too. Thought you were gone ‘gain” Your eyes darted away for a second, unfocused, before you curled your lips into a warm smile, that would show off your dimples. They were something about yourself that you really liked. Those and your freckles, as faint as they were.  
“Oh, I’m sorry! You guys were sound asleep, so I thought that I could make breakfast. Didn’t want to wake you” For a second he wondered how you could smile so bright already, after all that has happened, before he realised, that you didn’t. It wasn’t real. He should have known, after all, wasn’t he the same with his never faltering grin plastered onto his skull?  
“Eh, don’t worry. ‘s fine, kiddo!”  
“Yeah, whatever…” Your voice was just about a whisper, as you turned around again, concentrating on the oven.  
“But say, why are you wearing one of my hoodies?”  
“Found it in the living room, my clothes are in the washing machine. They weren’t really… ugh… nice anymore… Hope it’s not a problem. Miss Toriel promised me, she’d stop by to bring me a few things. I… uh… I’m sorry? I hope you are not mad!” You were glad that you had your back turned on him, so the skeleton couldn’t see the blush that was creeping up your face. “This was rude, wasn’t it? I shouldn’t have it just taken it, I am sorry…”  
“Nah, it’s fine, don’t worry, I’ve got a couple of ‘em!”  
“That explains, why you are always wearing one… Well, not the exact same one, there are always slight differences…”  
“Got a keen eye” You didn’t answer him but resumed your activity, slightly humming along to the song that was still playing. “Welp, you know what, I’mma get you something to wear until Tori-“ He chuckled a bit at the thought that you called the Goatmonster “Miss Toriel”, before he spoke up again, as you shot him a bewildered glance. “-until Tori gets here with the new stuff” This time, the smile you gave Sans seemed a bit more sincere, though still not quite there.  
“Really? That’d be really nice!” She pushed away from the counter and shrugged.  
“Eh, forgetaboutit, sure thing!”  
He quickly left the room, to grab a pair of clean shorts and a plain white shirt, that was a bit too small for him, after Papyrus washed it a too hot that one time. It would still be a bit too big for you, but it was better than walking around in Paps clothes. He chuckled at the thought, you’d probably be able to wear his stuff as a tent or dress.

Returning to the kitchen, Sans really had to contain his laughter now, but God damn it, the sight that unfolded before him was just too cute.  
You frantically tried to reach the package of powdered sugar, his brother kept on the top shelf of one of the drawers, even jumping up with your arms stretched out, but you could only brush it with your fingertips, actually shoving it back a bit instead of grabbing it. Once again you were swearing like a tiny little adorable sailor before you started climbing on the counter, stretching as far as you could.

Jup definitely no pants to cover up your undies. And those really were some nice, complimenting panties, he gotta admit that.

You let out a little victorious “yes!” as you got a hold of the sugar, grinning widely. Sans just leaned at the doorframe, enjoying the show, as you now had to face the difficulties of getting on the ground again. Carefully, the package pressed to your chest lightly, you took a wobbly step forward, and-just as you expected it-slipped.  
“Ah, fuck me sideways!” you murmured, as one of your legs, strummed over the edge, taking your balance with it, as the floor seemed to approach. You didn’t even scream, because what else would you expect to come out of your little stunt. You should have just used a chair or stool or ladder. Well fucking done, Elaine, you moron! Gosh, Sans would probably get a heart attack, when he’d come back, finding you on the kitchen floor with a cracked skull.  
But you would never meet with the kitchen tiles, as you suddenly experienced a weird sensation, almost as if someone pulled you back from your chest. Confused, you opened your eyes, your brow furrowing in confusion, as you could see a faint blue glow.  
“What the fuck..?” Your voice was quiet but not any less bewildered. Okay, that was a new one. You could just about make out the deep baritone of Sans’ voice, as he started cackling next to you. Your eyes darted towards him, and if you were able to move you knew, that you would have flinched, but you could not tell _why_.  
His right eyesocket went completely black whilst the other one seemed to be _burning_ in a bright, deep blue, a faint tint of yellow around the… iris? Yeah, iris. The same blue light you’ve already noticed surrounded his outstretched hand. He came closer, placing a pile of clothes on the kitchen table, before he reached out with his other hand. You couldn’t do anything else but watch in confusion. Suddenly the weird pulling sensation around your chest was gone and you dropped a few more inches, before you landed in Sans arm. Sneaky bastard, that’s why!  
“Heh, well, kiddo, you could have just said that you were falling for me.” He winked and you snorted, trying to hide your laughter.  
“Seriously Sans? You already pulled that one with Undyne. Step up your pun game, bonehead!” He made a dramatic, offended face, that made you laugh again, because he still grinned, but at the same time, he reminded you of one of those TV divas like MTT.  
“Oh, first Undyne and now me, don’t try to conceal it, _sugar_ ” He dropped off the powdered sugar right into your hands and you burst out laughing again.  
“Pfft, that was just a Freudian slip!” For a few seconds the skeleton looked at you while your slight smile stretched into a fully-fledged grin. “And now put me down, breakfast is ready, numbskull.”  
“Oh, yeah sure… Sorry, kinda forgot the gravity of the situation!” Your shoulders were shaking as you put the pancakes onto two plates, finishing them off with chocolate syrup and your hard earned powdered sugar. Just like Moms….

The thought alone put a little damper on your giggly mood, but you decided to ignore it and just took a bite out of your food. It was good, lifting your spirits ever so slightly. Sans sat across you, a bony hand placed on his jawline, quietly watching you for a while. You could feel yourself blushing a bit under his stare.  
“Heya buddy. Can I ask you a question?” You swallowed hard and turned your head a bit to the side, suddenly feeling uneasy.  
“S-sure?”  
“I know, this must be kin da hard but… When you had that accident of yours, you said you got stuck inside of that… void?” Your mouth went completely dry, and you bit your lip, as you nodded. “Say, you don’t happened to have… met someone there, right?” Oh boy. You could feel your heart sink to your stomach the exact instance the words left his mouth. It was like someone gripped it, or like it was turned into stone. You shook your head as fast as possible, strands of your jagged hair hanging into your face, before you brushed it aside.  
“Nope. Nothing! Why? Should I” Why was a good question. For example, why was your voice so high right now?

_Liar._

Shuddup!

“No, no, probably not.” Sans just shrugged, eyes ever so slightly closed. “Thought that maybe you’ve met someone, I might have known in there.”

_He’s talking about…_

I said, shuddup!

“Sorry, I don’t remember. Just me and my demons” Sans chuckled.  
“Yeah, sorry for bringing it up. Probably not a very pleasant topic.”  
“Nah, it’s fine, really!” You smiled at him gently, shoving another bite into your face.  
“You gonna tell me what happened to your hand?” God damn it! Eating and inhaling in surprise are not a good match, as you desperately grasped for air now, covering your hand at the same time. The sound of your fork hitting the plate as you dropped it echoed unnaturally loud.   
Of course he noticed. It was hard not to notice, where you had started pulling off little pieces of your skin in an anxiety attack, leaving behind the pink and red marks of your scratches and the light bruising that already started to develop. If you didn’t stop, it would have ended much worse. Last time you got this anxious, you got distracted during cooking and cut deep into your index finger. The wound was still healing.  
“Dunno. Had a nightmare…”

_Liar_

I know. 


	7. The literal equivalent of a pink, sparkly butterfly, stuck on a marshmallow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some domestic antics with Elaine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's 4am when uploading this and I am asking myself: Why? Why you stupid fuck?  
> And then I remember that I just really love fluff! <3

You were leaning to a grey concrete wall next to the school Frisk was enrolled in, slightly tapping your foot to the beat of the music that was blasting through your headphones as you were waiting for the bell to ring. Your index finger kept tapping the screen repeatedly as you tried to crack our personal high score on your favourite game. You just loved the challenge and how it managed to completely engulf you, preventing you from concentrating on anything else. You’ve grown to love it over a year ago and using it to try to forget your day to day problems. It worked pretty well and considering how often you needed it to calm you down, you were pretty frikking good at it as well. Right now, however, you just wanted to dawdle away, until school was out. Once again, you got way too into it, only realising that you slacked off for a bit too long as the first bunch of children were passing you. Quickly, you shoved your phone inside your back pocket, your headphones lazily draped around your neck before you started to walk towards the entrance paced, where you hoped to find Frisk, carefully avoiding to bump into the children. They were so tall for their age, or you were just tiny as fuck. Probably the latter.  
When you didn't see them, you started frowning, the lines on your forehead only deepening as you noticed the ruckus going on nearby.

Oh fuck me…

Picking up the pace, you inched closer, shoving people to the side, as they formed a ball. In the middle of the gathering, you could see two people, a boy and… Oh no.  
“Frisk…” The boy was pushing them so they would fall to the ground, seemingly unwilling to fight.  
“Come on, you scared, weirdo? Too afraid to say anything? Come on, call for your weirdo monster friends! You’re just stuck with them because no one else would want someone broken!” You could feel an immense heat rushing through you, as you watched Frisk tearing up slightly. Anger balled up inside your stomach and you pushed away the last few people in your way.  
“Hey!”  
“Watch it, lady!”  
“No pushing!” You chose to ignore the angry voices of the bystanders. How come that even some parents were just watching, not doing anything while this _godfucking bully decided to pick on Frisk?_

_Not on my watch!_

Faster than the kid could kick Frisk again, you squeezed between them, pushing him away from the child.  
“Back the fuck off, boy, if you don’t wanna be in a world of trouble right now!” His mouth just hung open in shock, as he looked at you. You might look like a tiny little, fragile flower, but something in your eyes, something about you, was intimidating as hell. You weren’t much taller than him, which made staring down at him quite hard, but you managed. “Frisk get up!” The kid shuffled up and hugged you from the side, hiding their face at your chest. “Hey it’s okay pal… As for you.” The boy went completely white as your red eyes were fixating him. “You better stop picking on them, do you understand me?”  
“Y-Yes, Ma’a…”  
“BILLY! What are you doing!?” A shrill voice pierced your ears and Frisk’s grip became just a bit tighter.  
Fan-Fucking-Tastic!  
A tall woman with bleached hair pulled the boy-Billy as it seemed-in a tight embrace. Her face scrunched up like she’d just bitten into a lemon.  
“What happened to you, my sweet pumpkin?”  
“Nuffin, Mom…” He seemed to be embarrassed by his mother, which made your lips curl just the tiniest bit.  
“You are all dirty!”  
“Excuse me, you must be that kids mother, right?” She scanned you pejorative, scrunching up her nose.  
“Yes, I happen to be.”  
“Good, saves me a lot of trouble. See, I happened to stumble upon finding you hellspawn bullying Frisk. I’m sure, you had no idea, he was doing it, because you would have prevented it otherwise. I’d appreciate if you told him to mind his own god damn business, ait?”  
“And you are…?”  
“Name’s Elaine, I live with their… uncles.”  
“So you are with… _them_ …” The way she said that word, oh boy, did that pissed you off majorly. Monsters were so kind and friendly, you would not let some stupid suburban Mom badmouth them and push an innocent kid around like that.  
“The monsters? Yeah, I am. You got problem with that?”  
“Ugh, freak…” she muttered and you glared at her. “Tell your… niece or whatever she is, to stay away from my son!” Niece. Nice, well fucking done. Frisks tiny arms started shaking after flinching at the term. You scanned her for a moment, before freeing yourself from the tight embrace, strutting right up to the woman, pushing a finger to her chest.  
“Listen here, Linda…”  
“My names not…”  
“I don’t give half a _shit_ about your name, but if you say crap like that again, I have absolutely no problem with punching you square in you beauty doctored, face lifted grimace. And you better tell your stupid ass goblin that crawled out of that hole there to behave himself or you and me are not going to be friends. And you want me to be your friend, don’t you? _You_ _don’t want to have a bad time_ , _do you_?” What’s-her-face stared at you in complete and utter shock, not even able to blink, before her jaw snapped shut with a clearly audible clank as her teeth crushed together. She huffed angrily and turned away, grabbing Billy, who looked up at you in sheer amazement, like he never witnessed someone sticking up to his mother, by the hand and stomping away with an almost theatrical _HMPF_ you've ever seen in your life!    
You however felt a shit eating grin spread across your face, as Frisk hugged you tightly again

_Thank you, thank you, thank you! That was awesome! No one ever dared to sass Helen!_

“Don’t mention it, kiddo! Your mom would have kicked my butt if I let that prick terrorise you.”

_Thank you, Laney!_

It was just so adorable to see the childish face lighten up this much. You wiped away a bit of dirt on their face, smiling at them.

_But… what are you doing here? Where’s mom?_

“She’s fine, Frisk, don’t worry. But there was something wrong with your… sink or some stuff and she wanted to ask Sans or Papy if they could pick you up. Sans hat to work though and Paps was already with Undyne, so I offered to collect ya. That a problem for you? Don’t wanna get seen with the weird human?” you teased and they quickly shook their head, grinning up at you.

_Nuuuu, you are not weird. You were so badass!_

“If you say so, kiddo. Now let’s get you home, looks like its about to start raining. Don’t want you to get wet and sick. Toriel will hand me my own ass, if that happens!” Frisk just giggled and took your hand as you started walking. “Oh, and…. Maybe don’t tell her, that I was swearing, okay?” This would have been nice, if it weren’t for the tiny voice inside of your head.

_You sounded just like him back there…. Starting to pick up the memories?_

Just as you predicted, rain was pouring down on you, thunder rolling through the empty streets and lightning illuminating the surroundings from time to time. Toriel almost didn’t want to let you go after Frisk told her the story of the brave, tiny woman that saved her from the evil Helen and her son. Kid had a talent for exaggerating.  
But it was fine, you loved walking through the rain, feeling the droplets burst against your skin. Rain always felt special to you, almost like it could wash away anything, taking all of the dirt with it.  
It also made your tears invisible.  
Yes, you liked rain, thunderstorms even more so. In college, you had to sit there for hours and listen to the professors ramble on about all kinds of physical stuff you weren’t really interested at all. But electricity, the lectures about lightning and tesla coils-how you could produce music with the vibrations in the air that would arise from the leftover volt in the air… Now that fascinated you.  
Thunderstorms were music to you, quite literally. If you closed your eyes and just listened, one could make out the melody, the tune that was hiding, like a story that needed to be told. It was basically magic to you, absolute and utterly beautiful.  
When you came home, you were completely drenched and your head was buzzing with unused energy. You could hear the vertebros murmur in the living room and quickly slipped into the bathroom, drying off and changing to something, that wasn’t soaked. Too lazy to blowdry your hair, you just rubbed it a bit with a towel before you put said cloth and your wet clothes into the dryer. Humming a little tune that seemed to be stuck in your head, you walked into the living room, zipping up the front of the hoodie. Admittedly, it was one of Sans’ but you hoped, that he wouldn’t mind you borrowing one. It was way too big and too long, but very fuzzy and warm. No wonder he liked wearing them so much.  
“Hey, I’m back. Tori asked me to-is everything alright?” Payrus was curled up on the couch, his hands pressed to the side of his skull and shivering. His brother was kneeling in front of him, a distressed look on his face. Quickly, his eyes darted to you, and he got up.  
“It’s the thunderstorm. They scare Paps, it’s like that every time. I couldn’t figure out how to calm him down yet. He even refuses spaghetti!” The small skeleton looked so distressed, real worry in his voice.  
“Why does it scare him? It’s just a bit of electrostatic energy lingering in the atmosphere and the rapid expansion of air surrounding a lightning bolt?” For about two or three seconds Sans was at a loss of words, almost impressed, before he caught himself.  
“We… Back when we were still living underground, we never had something like that. It just seems so dangerous if you don’t understand it-and lightning isn’t really harmless either. Lots of monsters are scared of it. It’s so much energy, bundled up in one tiny moment, it could turn any of us into dust with no problem whatsoever.” Your expression softened up a bit, as you smiled gently at him.  
“Let me try, okay? I’ll see what I can do…”  
“What? Elaine, what are you…?” You just ignored him completely, taking a deep breath, before you started to take a few wobbly steps towards the couch, until you were right in front of Payprus’ line of sight. As his eyes glanced towards you, you started sniffing and actually tearing up before you let yourself drop to the floor, letting out a very convincing, distressed sob and covering your face with your hands. Within a matter of seconds both Papyrus and Sans where by your side, confused and concerned what just happened.  
“HUMAN, ARE YOU ALRIGHT?”  
“Y-Yes, Papy…” You squeaked out weakly. “I-Its just… I am so frightened because of the storm, and I don’t know what to do. You-You a-are so brave and I-I am…” You let out another sob, wiping away a crocodile tear, before Papyrus took your shaking hand and leading you to the couch.  
“FEAR NOT, TINY HUMAN!” Really? Again with the tiny? “FOR I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS SHALL PROTECT YOU! AFTER ALL I AM VERY GREAT AND BRAVE!”  
“T-Thank you, Papy…” you whispered and wrapped your hands around him, rather than the other way around. You could feel him slightly shaking and flinching every time, the room got ignited by lightning, but it got better as you held him so close, your legs neatly folded in front of you and one of your hands carefully stroking Papyrus’ skull to calm him down, still humming an appeasing tune. Sans sat down next to you, watching in awe as his brother seemed to get calmer by the second, nuzzled closely against you, until he finally fell asleep. You still continued to stroke his head with a tiny smile watching him sleep.  
“How’d you know that would work?” Sans voice was quiet, to not wake his brother and your smile grew a bit.  
“My sister’s always been afraid of thunderstorms. But she was also very proud. So I started to pretend to be scared so she could “protect” me, when in reality, she just needed an excuse to get a big hug. It’s a pride thing. An old friend of my mother once told me-they were an emergency doctor, driving around with ambulances and stuff that most of the time when they were picking up old people, women were much more open to the idea of being helped to the car. Men however had a lot of pride to swallow, so it would make things easier if the paramedic pretended to be weak and that the old man would help them to the ambulance, even though it was the exact opposite. This tactic seemed to have worked with my sister, and I thought that maybe it could work with the Great Papyrus as well….” Once again, Sans looked at you in complete awe and if you’d pay a bit more attention to him instead of his sleeping brother, that was still hugging your waist in his sleep, you would have noticed this expression.  
“It’s nice to see how gentle you act around everyone, kid, considering what has happened in the past…” You let out a barely audible chuckle.  
“Someone once told me, that I was the literal human equivalent of a pink, sparkly butterfly stuck on a marshmallow.. Guess they were right” The skeleton started laughing with you and you leaned into him, slowly closing your eyes.  
“Yeah, you definitely are!” He wrapped an arm around your shoulder to steady you, as you smiled, still humming and hugging his brother. “You gonna tell me why you were crying though? I can still see the stains”  
“I just really like thunderstorms and their music…”  
“Music?”  
“Yes…. _There’s music in everything_ ….”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact of the day: The story with the paramedics, yeah, my bro is a doctor and tells me a lot of stuff like that all the time. So I have a bunch of random knowledge stuck in my brain AND I WILL USE IT!


	8. FITE ME!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SOME ANGST! AND FLUFF! AND ELAINE WANTS TO FITE EVERYONE!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be fluff but then anxiety happened AND NOW ITS ANGST; MUHAHAHAH!  
> But you'll get your fluff next chapter, I promise!  
> AND I WISH THAT I COULD USE WING DINGS IN HERE; BUT IM A STUPID; SO YALL NEED TO DEAL WITH THIS FUCKER INSTEAD! "____________"  
> -warning-  
> This has some mild puking in it, as well as teasing the smol!

_It was dark when you opened your eyes for the first time. Pitch black, the air thick and stale and no wind was blowing, creating a sensation of absolute… stagnation. It was so hard to breathe, too hard and your lungs just wouldn’t work, refused to get the air you needed so badly. Everything hurt so much and you could feel tears prickle at the corners of your eyes as a memory flashed in front of your eyes, effectively making you squeeze them shut as tight as you could, borderline painful. Not as painful as the thing you saw though.  
Lizzy’s face was burned into your brain, the image of her bloody and pale face, looking at you in total shock, as their heart fluttered and eventually stopped, your name on their lips. You felt so guilty, like you had her with your own hands. Funny, but you can still feel the strong hands of the hospital security, dragging you outside the room as you struggled, wanting to get to your sister and just making sure they would be alright, even though you knew, that they were gone. Your sister, sweet innocent, precious cinnamon roll Elizabeth was gone and you couldn’t stop blaming yourself. So you embraced the darkness as it greeted you with open arms, as you were forced to relive it over and over and over again, unable to forget any second of it.  
Now you were regretting taking up the offer, as it was just… nothing. It was so empty and cold in here, like you would never be able to escape. So you do the only thing you wanted to do: Run away from yourself, from everything you felt and the images that just wouldn’t go away. You ran and ran and ran and ran, until you couldn’t do it anymore, collapsing to the floor as your knees buckled under you. But the images were still there and you started screaming, as loud as you could until the void screamed back at you and you were starting to spit blood.  
How was this even possible? On the other hand, did you really wanna know?  
“Excuse me, are you alright…?” a strangely familiar voice greeted you. Too tired to continue your screaming, your tired, empty eyes darted to the figures that had appeared, simply shaking your head. “Golly… You must be so confused… Shall we bring them somewhere safe and take care of them?”_  
_"----------------?"_  
_the second voice confused you at first, it didn’t seem to be quite real, and you had a really hard time comprehending._  
_“Who…. Are you?” you whispered with a strained voice, a bit of blood dribbling down from the corner of your mouth and your fists still pressed against your skull._  
_“Oh my, looks like you took quite the beating…. But let me introduce myself first. Greetings, I am……………………….” The voice faded out as did your vision. You couldn’t remember this moment very well and it scared you shitless!_  
_“I’m… I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that?” The warm, embracing voice started giggling a menacing laugh that wasn’t very warm and embracing anymore. “Excuse me?”_  
_“But Elaine! You should know who I am by now?” The voice got deeper, different and oh so familiar, sending unnerving shivers down your spine. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no oh please no, not that, not this voice._  
_The small fragile body leapt forward pinning your small and broke frame effectively down by the throat, totally not the body you were seeing in front of you just a few minutes ago. The now familiar figure leaned forward, hands still clutching your throat and strangling you. If only you had the power to fight back. “Won’t you remember me, Darlin? The love of our life?” His voice got deeper and deeper. “You are mine, you stupid slut accept it!” Tears started streaming down your cheeks and a silent scream tried to escape you, as Hughs face stared at you in a twisted, maniac expression. “You are mine, H O N E Y!” He leaned forward and whispered in your ear, making you scream as hard as you could._  
_“And you’ll never escape me!”_

Sans watched you for a long time, even after you fell asleep, Papyrus still hugging you and mumbling sleepy Nye-Heh-Heh’s. Your head was nestled comfortably on his shoulder and gentle breaths met his vertebrae from time to time. You two had been talking for hours or at least it felt that way, until you dozed off. He couldn’t help himself but think how cute and beautiful you looked in your sleep. Your face would be clear from all signs of worry or fear. No bones about it, you were _very_ good at hiding it, always smiling at everyone, always kind and energetic, like a human ray of sunlight. But the smile never quite reached your eyes, and there was still something in your expression, a splinter of pain that just wouldn’t go away, as hard as you tried. In your sleep however, your face resembled pure bliss, almost like a blank slate. Your full, rosy lips were slightly opened, a slight blush covering your cheeks and the adorable freckles on your nose and cheekbones. Long lashes were casting a slight shadow underneath them, still a little bit damp. One of your hands still rested on top of Papyrus head the other one gripped the fabric of Sans Hoodie around his ulna slightly. He still had his arm sneaked around you, to steady your small and fragile body. But oh boy, you were everything _but_ fragile.  
Suddenly you started to shift and your face scrunched up a bit. A heavy shiver made your body shake so hard, that he could basically feel it. Though it wasn’t the only thing he could feel. Strangely enough, it almost felt like your soul was in huge distress, like it was being threatened or hurt. Papyrus seemed to have taken notice as well, as his eyes sprung up in confusion.  
“S-sans, what… what happened? Is the human alright?” His brother sat up on the other side of her, concern crossing his features as Elaine let out a tiny whimper, desperately holding on to San’s arm. Damn, her hands were shaking, even though, she appeared to be fast asleep.  
Suddenly, terrified, glossy red eyes were glancing towards the skeleton, locking eye contact with him for just about a second, before she basically jumped off the couch, crawling away backwards. A strangled scream was stuck inside her throat.    
“H-Human? IS EVERYTHING ALLRIGHT”  
"__________!” she whimpered, bringing her arms up, almost as if she wanted to protect her face. Both skeletons froze up this exact instance, Papyrus rather confused, almost as if he had forgotten something very important but couldn’t really gather up why. Sans on the other hand could remember very well.  
_P-Please don’t hurt me!  
_ He couldn’t really tell, what shocked him more. Your words or how you said them.  
“H-Hey, kiddo. ‘s fine! ‘t was only a nightmare. No one’s gonna hurt you here. ‘s just me and Paps.” Elaine blinked a few times, the harsh red eyes getting softer again, the shaking slowly fading away.  
“S-Sans…?” Carefully, he slipped of the couch and sat down beside the human, careful not to touch her, his brother still watching in confusion.  
Before he could start to speak however, Elaine threw one hand over her mouth and started scrambling of the floor, jolting to the bathroom. He could hear the noises of her constricting as she appeared to be… vomiting? Oh, how he would have loved to swear now, but not in front of his sweet and innocent baby brother.  
Said baby brother was already at the door, before Sans could even react.  
“HUMAN? ARE YOU NOT FEELING WELL?”  
“-‘m fine, Papy…” Her voice was so fragile and hurt, it almost broke his heart.  
“Y-YOU DON’T SOUND FINE?” He got his answer in the form of another puking attack. You clung to the toilet in desperation, leaning your forehead against the cool tiles of the wall casually wiping your mouth and ignoring the voices outside the door. Your chest felt so heavy, like it was pulling you down, until you felt the familiar _tweng_ , which would soothe you quite a bit.

_It’s alright…. He’s not here. He can’t find us. I won’t let him do this anymore. I promised._

As always the voice inside your head would ease your pain as best as they could but…

_It’s been such a long time since the last nightmare._

“I only have nightmares…” you mumbled, lightly closing your eyes and trying to contain whatever’s left inside your stomach.

_You know what I mean…_

“Yeah, thought we’d been done with that…”

_….You spoke…_

“I know! I… I know… Just happened… ‘s fine though, no one will know, its just gibberish for them.”

_…._

“….Won’t let it happen again…” You touched your chest right above your heart with a sad smile, as you felt a protective warmth filling you. “Thanks…”

Where Papyrus was very considerate to not just barge in on you while you were a messy mess on the bathroom floor, Sans was a whole different chapter. He just blatantly opened the door and come in _and then_ knocked on the frame. You would just throw him a slightly amused glare, before pressing your head back against the wall. The skeleton sat down across from you, the toilet inbetween the two of you.  
“Hey kiddo. You don’t really look that good…”  
“Charming… Also, no puns? I’m surprised. This was the perfect opportunity to _spew_ a few of them.” He just chuckled.  
“Figured you’d be _hurling_ them out enough right now” You snickered quietly and put on a tired, lazy smile.  
“That one was terrible….”  
“Sorry, that was a bit of _a long shot_.” A groan left your throat but you were still smiling.  
“You are terrible, you know that?”  
“Yes, but you love me for it!”  
“I do but you’re still a dork…” Laughing really strained your voice, but you couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. Silence lingered between you for a few moments, before Sans started to scrape at his skull in discomfort.  
“Was the nightmare that bad?”  
“’t was pretty obvious?”  
“Yeah… Wanna talk about it?” You just shrugged your hanging shoulders and let the corners of your mouth twitch.  
“Nothing special, the usual… Death, Hugh and… the void?” The skeleton nodded and grew silent again for a few second. “’s your soul alright?”  
“My what? Wait, wait, wait? Soul?” Confusion crossed your face and Sans sighed a bit.  
“Yes, your soul. It is your very being, what makes you…well, you. Usually, you cant feel them and draw them out only when you either fight, heal or… well…” A slight blue blush formed across his cheek bones and you bit your lip to not start laughing. “Sans, are you… are you blushing!”  
“H-Hey! I-I never had to give someone the talk before! Papy is too pure and innocent for it and well… This is awkward, isn’t it?”  
“A bit, but save yourself, I know everything about the birds and the bees. I am old enough for this kind of conversation. Geee, Sans, I am almost 23, it would be pretty weird if I didn’t… Wait, how old are you anyways?  
“You are distracting me, Elaine!” His blush grew even bigger and so did your grin. “Man, this was supposed to be a serious talk, kiddo…”  
“Are you _sure_ , you want to call me kiddo, while talking about doing the dirty?”  
“I swear to Asgore, you are going to be the death of me one day!”    
“Okay, okay, _spit it out_ , I’m sorry” Your voice was barely audible, as you had to laugh so hard, that it started hurting your throat again.  
“Alright. Your soul seemed in a lot of pain when you were asleep. I’d like to check on it, if you wouldn’t mind.”  
“I-is it safe? T have it out, I mean..?”  
“Uuuh yeah, as long as I wont draw it out in a malicious intent, you’re alright…”  
“Well, okay, then… I guess…” Sans nodded and pointed towards your chest, making a fist.

 _Don’t_ _!_

You were filled with panic this instance, was this a bad thing, oh god..?

“W-wait, Sans I changed my…”

Too late.

_Pull._

_Twang._

_Snap._

_Puke._

The second, Sans seemed to pull out your soul, you could feel a sharp pain inside of you and leapt forward to say goodbye to the last bits of your lunch. Groaning you leaned back, wiping your mouth and glaring at Sans, who was panting heavily.

“Ooooookay… let’s not try that one again!” A part of you despised how weak you were sounding and another part how weak you were feeling.  
“Agreed. That… certainly never happened before…”  
“What even _did_ happen?”  
“Tried to pull out your soul, to have a look at it… But it refused.”  
“Why? Why is my soul being a bitch?”  
“Guess it’s too scared to come out and play nice?” You whipped your tired face and groaned.  
“Twat” Slowly you pulled yourself up and went to the sink with wobbly legs to wash out your mouth. “Okay, that was certainly something. And now that I lost my lunch and didn’t get dinner, I think I should change that.”

 

Walking back into the living room after a good two rounds of brushing your teeth, you saw Papyrus back on the couch, tapping away on what appeared to be..  
“Hey Paps, why are you on my phone?” you grinned at him.  
“OH! HUMAN! I AM GLAD TO SEE YOU ALRIGHT AGAIN! DID MY BROTHER FIX YOU?”  
“uuuuuh, sure… It was a very… heart-warming experience… Anyways, what’cha doin there?”  
“OH, I AM SORRY! I SAW YOU PLAYING YOUR PUZZLES EARLIER AND WANTED TO TRY THEM AS WELL, AS I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAS GREAT PUZZLE SOLVING SKILLS!”  
“Puzzle? Oh, you mean my game? It’s kinda hard, I’ve been stuck on that one level for ages now. Why don’t you try one of the earlier lev…”  
“OH, YOU CAN HAVE IT BACK! I JUST FINNISHED IT!”  
“A level?”  
“NO, THE GAME! IT WAS VERY INTRUIGING AND I ENJOYED THE VARIOUS PUZZLES VERY MUCH!” You didn’t answer immediately and once you gained the ability to speak again, you turned towards a shit eating grinning Sans.  
“How long have we’ve been in there?”  
“Dunno, ‘bout 15 minutes?” Cackling laughter filled your head before you could manage to ignore it. “Isn’t my brother the coolest?”  
“I feel dumb now. HOWEVER, I’m getting’ hungry again, and I really craved Chinese Take-out lately, are you guys on board with this?”  
“OH, IS THIS THE AMAZING FOOD; UNYDE AND ALPHYS WANTED TO TRY FOR SO LONG?”  
“Dunno, bro.”  
“Woah, Woah, Woah, Guys, you never had Asian food?”  
“Nope. Never got around it.” Nothing could describe the utter shock and disturbance you felt at this exact moment.  
“Okay, we need to change that, and we need to change that _now_! How did you survive?”  
“Spaghetti, mainly?”  
“YES, INDEED! CHEF PAPYRUS MAKES THE BEST SPAGHETTI, BUT I WANT TO TASTE THIS SO CALLED TAKE-OUT AS WELL, TINY HUMAN!”  
“Oh, you will! Wait, lemme ring Undyne real quick, this is a national catastrophe.”  
“I don’t think it’s that…”  
“Sssssssht, I’m calling Undyne now!” you hushed him, as you held the phone to your ear.

_-Yo, PUNK! What’s up? You okay?_

“Yeah, hey to you as well. Say, me and the boys are ordering Chinese food because, they never had it, and I wanted to ask if you and Alphys would like to come over as well. Just to make sure, that you get some as well, because seriously, how can anyone survive without that?”

_-I dunno, Spaghetti?_

“Am I missing something with this spaghetti trend here, Jesus Christ on a bike, I know Italian’s good, but you guys are something else!” You could hear Undyne heckling loud enough, that you needed to hold the phone away from your head in order to not go deaf.

_-ALRIGHT, SMOL NERD! Alphy and me will be there in a flash, don’t order without us, or I WILL POMMEL YOU!_

“Yeah, I love you too, Honey. Hurry up, I’m hungry.” She hung up, before she could say anything else and you chuckled to yourself.  
“WHAT DID SHE SAY, TINY HUMAN?”  
“Okay, seriously, if you guys wont stop with that tiny thing, I will fite you!” you muttered under your breath before you grinned up at the tall skeleton. “They’ll be here in a few minutes!”  
“WOWIE! I’LL GO GRAB THE BLANKETS FOR THE SLEEPOVER! SHALL I ASK TORIEL AND THE TINIER HUMAN, IF THEY WANT TO JOIN US AS WELL?” Of course it would turn into a  giant sleepover.  
“Sure, why not, Paps?” Sans shrugged and watched his overly excited brother run out of the room. Just as he wanted to join him, you grabbed his wrist, a light blush covering your cheeks. “Hey, you alright there?”  
“I-I need to call someone… But I’m scared of doing it alone…” you mumbled in embarrassment and he just chuckled at you.  
“Oh? Who is it?”  
“Sh-she used to be my best friend… But when things were going sour, I lost contact with her. I want to change that. B-but I might be scared… Don''t tell Undyne I'm scared, she'd tease me so much!” Sans just laughed louder, the grin spreading ever so slightly.  
“Alright shorty, let’s ring her up then.”  
“Fite me!” You glared as he pat your head.  
“Nah. You should know, that _I would never hurt you!_ ” You could feel an icy splinter inside of your heart at his words. No, not your heart.

Your soul.


	9. A sleepy baby koala

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PTA shenanigans, a visit and Undyne and Laney are gosh darn adorable!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BOI, LOOK AT THAT; I GOT FANART AND IT'S GOSHDARN AMAZING, THANKS HANNAH!!! <3 <3 <3 
> 
> http://taraneedragon.tumblr.com/post/141367380170/queenundertrash-s-oc-elaine-in-gsans-jacket
> 
> FANART MAKES ME HAPPY AF!!
> 
> Also, this chapter got RIDICULOUSLY long, so Imma cut it up into two and will update the 2nd half of it later, buttercups <3

“No Barbara, that’s a stupid idea, and you know that! Wha-, No we are not starting to forcef… Excuse me? Do you even lis… Barb, could you shut up for a second? Yes, I know, Yes, that one too! Oh my god, it is Saturday morning, I swear to god, if you call me again at that hour or time, I will make you eat all of Helens shitty lemon bars at once! Yes, I meant that! We can discuss all of that at the next meeting! Yes, I know that Helen is there. Do I look like I give a shit? Yes…Yes… No, Kay, bye, Barb!” You hung up your phone and let out a deep groan as you put your head back against the table. Sans chuckled and put a cup of coffee in front of you.  
“Rough morning?”  
“Remember me to slap Miss Toriel later!”  
“I still can’t believe that she made you join the PTA at Frisk’s school” You shot a short glare at the grinning skeleton and took a sip of the coffee. You usually really disliked it but today, you needed it.  
“I still can’t believe that I said yes!” Sans only chuckled and you let out a desperate groaning, throwing your arms into the air. “And I’m not even allowed to call ‘em out on their shit, seriously, some of them are so stupid. How can anyone be that stupid, I don’t understand!” Your opposite couldn’t stop looking at you as you just stared at your coffee in desperation like it had all the answers you wanted. “Last week, Greg asked why Lisa from 3 rd grade refused to eat his nut bars and complained how rude it was and when I tried to explain him that she is highly allergic, he just stared at me and straight up told me that I shouldn’t encourage her to be so picky! And when she ate them and got an allergic shock he was all like, I didn’t know that allergies are a real thing, I just thought she didn’t like it and was a picky eater, Like OH MY FUCKING GOD; how stupid can someone be?”  
“Wasn’t that the guy you almost punched square in the face?” You just moaned as an answer.  
“I am not even allowed to sass them, this is pure hell!” The skeleton grabbed your hand from across the table and rubbed his thumb across the back soothingly. Your lips curled into a thankful smile, four face still planted on the table. “Thanks Sans, I’m sorry that you have to listen to me ranting and whining.”  
“Eh, s’ okay, kiddo. No bones about it, I would have gone crazy already, you’re doin’ great! And Frisk loves ya, I’m sure they are happy to have you there.”  
“I hope so…”  
“I’m sure you are doing just fine. And if this suburban hell Tori put you in could need one thing, it’s a sassy tiny fireball like you.” You still didn’t know he pulled it off, but he winked at you. At this point you just dismissed it as magic.  
“Okay, this tiny thing is getting out of hand, Sans!” you whined and he just squeezed your hand a bit tighter, his thumb still running across the sensible skin.  
“You know that I’m just pulling your leg here kiddo” Giggling, you made a small kick in his direction and he started laughing as well. “Didn’t hit your funny bone?”  
“You are terrible, you know?”  
“Oh, come on, Laney, you love me for it.” A slight blush spread across your face, and you turned your head away from him.  
“Yeah, and you know it, Dork!” You could already hear him suck in air to make another bad pun, as your phone started vibrating again. “Jesus Fucking Christ on a Wheelie Bin, I swear to everything I know, if that’s some PTA shit again, I will punch a fucking hole into the wall, are those idiots serious, it’s not even 10am!” The skeleton just laughed at you as you hesitantly answered the call. “I really hope that something is burning right now, I didn’t even have my first coffee yet…” Sans watched you as you shuffled into the living room, the phone pressed to your head and a pained expression on your face and he couldn’t stop smiling. The past few weeks, you started to bloom again, always cheery and joking around, playing with his brother or Frisk, hanging on the phone with Undyne and Alphys for hours sometimes and even your fake smile seemed a bit more sincere lately. He liked being around you, enjoyed your company and the long talks you were having late at night sometimes, when the nightmares would plague either of you. You weren’t pressuring each other to explain or tell but rather gave the other person comfort and a sense of relaxation, soothing the fear and pain that would linger inside the two of you. Sometimes you didn’t even talk but sat next to each other in silence, just enjoying the others company or watching a movie. He didn’t know how she did it, but it helped. She got along with his brother very well too, it was almost scary. Just like when she was helping him back then at the thunderstorm, she seemed to know exactly how to deal with Papyrus’ shenanigans and make him feel great about himself, effectively boosting his self-esteem while handling the situation expertly. And Papyrus seemed to like her just as much, which made Sans happy as well. He enjoyed nothing more, than seeing his baby brother happy and loved, in his eyes, Paps deserved nothing but the best.  
Lost in his own thoughts, he almost didn’t hear the doorbell ringing and jolted a bit in surprise. You, still on the phone, turned your head, muffling the whining that was coming out of the speaker with one hand.  
“Sansy, could you please answer the door, I’m a bit stuck here right now? I’ll be right there!”  
“S-Sure thing!” The skeleton flushed bright blue for a second, before calming down a bit. You loved your nicknames, calling him Sansy and his brother Paps or Papy whenever you could, same with the others, but it still caught him off-guard sometimes.  
Burring his hands deep inside the pockets of his hoodie, he shuffled to the door, opening it without really looking. In front of the apartment a tall woman towered before him, perfectly styled and well dressed, the makeup accentuating her almost radiating caramel coloured skin and the deep red ringlet curls that were bouncing all over the place could almost be called a mane. She looked at a piece of paper in her hand, back at Sans, back and the paper and then slowly took off her sunglasses and placed them inside of her bag carefully.  
“Excuse me, my name is Carmen Cantabella, I am here to look for someone, but I think I might have the wrong address. Elaine Winters?”  
“Oh yeah, Laney’s inside, she’ll be here in a flash, just has to finish a call...”  
“Ah, I see…” The woman hat a strong accent and intelligent, hazel eyes were scanning him cautiously. He already braced himself for a hate fueled comment. Many humans weren’t especially keen on monsters. Her reaction however surprised him, as a sheepish smile started to tug at the corners of her mouth. “Say, are you aware, that you are, in fact, a skeleton?”

Oh, he tried. He tried so hard. Sans really did, but he just couldn’t stop himself from making a dumb comment.

His hands started shaking and he stared at them in total shock like it was the first time he’d ever seen them.  
“Oh my god! No… How could I never realise that I am, in fact, a skeleton?”  
“Hey, ignore him, he’s just being a sarcastic twat!” You said, as you approached the door a crocked grin on your face.  
“Oh, you break my heart, shorty!”  
“You know that I am right!”  
“And you love it!”  
“Never said I didn’t” You winked at him and smiled shyly at the woman, your hands buried deep inside the pockets of the hoodie you got from Sans. “Heya Curly…. L-Long time no see!”

It was an awkward twenty seconds of silence, before Carmen dropped her purse in a loud sobbing noise, pushed Sans out of the way and tackled you. The skeleton was instantly ready to pull the woman away from you, since he didn’t know her and she could be just like that other girl back then. He instantly dropped his defensive stance however, as he saw, the woman hugging you tightly, the face buried in your hair and violent sobs shaking her body. “H-Hey, it’s alright, Curls, I’m fine, it’s fine…”  
“I thought, I lost you! I thought he took you away for good. I was so scared when you called, scared that it might be the last time, I am sorry, so sorry, please forgive me…”  
“’s okay, really… You can let go of me now. I’m-I’m alright, really!” She slowly peeled away, her mascara slightly smudged as you carefully wiped it away with your thumb. The woman you called Curly but introduced herself as Carmen nodded quickly and turned around to Sans, her hand outstretched.  
“I am sorry, that was probably very rude.”  
“S fine. I’m Sans. Sans, the skeleton, but you already figured that part out” He winked at her and you nudged him with your elbow.  
“Be nice, okay?” The skeleton just grinned at you and you rolled your eyes.  
“Sans, like the font Sans?”  
“Yeah, like the font Sans, just like his brother Papyrus.” You answered absentmindedly. “They also speak in their respectively fonts”  
“What?”  
“What?”  
“ _Nothing_!” you chirped and practically pranced into the living room, Sans and your guest following you. The skeleton frowned for a second, as he followed you. “Why don’t you sit down, hmm?” Both women sat down on the couch so Sans settled for the only place left, which was right beside you.  
“Okay, care to explain, Laney?” he mumbled and you smiled at him.  
“Uuuh, that’s Curly, I mean Carmen Cantabella, the friend I told you about…”  
“The one you were scared of calling?” A bright red blush coloured your face and you looked away in embarrassment.  
“She… wasn’t supposed to know that, Sans…” Awkward silence filled the room, as your friend watched you for a few seconds, before flashing a radiant smile.  
“Excuse me, but were you the one who get her away from that man?” Sans shot a glance at you, but you only stared at the floor with a stern expression, hugging your knees.  
“Uuuuh, you could say so, I guess?” She smiled a bit more shaken up, and took one of your hands to knead them.  
“Thank you.”  
“Curls, please…”  
“No, I mean it! I tried really hard to get him away from her, but he… has his methods of…”  
“Geeee, you really suck at small talk, you know that!”  
“I am sorry, Dear, I just…” You just hugged your knees a bit tighter.  
“s fine… Just don’t wanna talk about it.”  
“Alright. What do you wanna talk about?”  
“Dunno. How are you, how was life anything new?” The look your former best friend gave you was warm and kind, almost filled with love.  
“Of course. I’ve been fine the past years. I’m a doctor now, Pediatrician and Interspecies research to be exact. And I am engaged, since autumn. You really need to attend the wedding.”  
“That’s really nice. Never thought you’d become a doctor though, especially for children!” She just laughed a loud, clear laugh.  
“Neither did I! But you know, you never know what’ll happen? But how about you, how’s your job going?”  
“I uuuh… I don’t have one! After graduating quantum physics, I became a house wife and well…. That’s it!”  
“You always sucked at physics, why did you….” She noticed the look on your face and her cheery tone instantly muted. “oh…”  
“Yeah…”  
“What about music, you always loved it?”  
“Eh… I never had a chance in that business!” Sans next to you shuffled a bit.  
“I might know a guy who…”  
“ _No_!” Maybe your voice came off a bit too sharp and harsh, going by the shocked faces of Sans and Curly. “No, it’s alright. I don’t wanna. I’l find something moderate soon, don’t worry.”  
“Elaine, you… You always loved…” Your former best friend started but you interrupted her.  
“You're right. Past tense. Loved. Not anymore, it’s history, so please. Leave it at that.”  
“But…”  
“SANS! TINY HUMAN! I HAVE RETURNED FROM MY TRIP TO THE GROCERY!” You put on a kind smile and turned your head towards the hallway.  
“We’re here, Papy. And I’m having a guest over, do you wanna meet them?”  
“YES, I CERTAINLY WANT TO!” His voice was as enthusiastic and loud as always but he sounded so happy. Curly however threw you a weird glance that made you frown.  
“What?” Her skin reddened, as she looked away, awkwardly scratching her head.  
“Uuuuh, nothing, really…”  
“You are a shh…”  
“Laney! Language! My brother is nearby!” Sans hissed and you poked your tongue towards him.  
“a terrible liar, Curls!”  
“Ooooh, alright. I don’t know, ‘s a bit bewildering, that you called Sans brother that name so openly…”  
“Name? What name?” you and the short skeleton besides you asked in unison. “Papy?”  
“Yes?”  
“What’s wrong with that?” Sans asked while it dawned at you and hid your completely flustered face with your hands.  
“She thinks I’m calling him Daddy…” You mumbled and just wanted to disappear forever.  
“Wait what?”  
“Yes, I just noticed but Papy in Spanish means Daddy, Oh my god, I’ve been calling papyrus Daddy for _weeks_ now without realising it.” Your friend next to you started just heckling away while Sans seemed to be devoid of any emotions, his eyesockets completely black and empty in shock. “Don’t kinkshame me, Curly!”

 

The hours went ticking by, as you caught up with your former best friend, just enjoying the first real talk you had in years, before you started to doze off again, falling asleep in her lap. A dopy smile was on her lips as she gently brushed your uneven, black hair.  
“She looks so peaceful when she sleeps, right?” She whispered towards Sans, who was still sitting on the couch with you and he just nodded, his eyes glued to your tiny statue in the tall woman’s lap. “I missed her so much. You can’t imagine, how hard it was, to see her wit Hugh, unable to do anything.”  
“Why didn’t you?” the skeleton growled. “Why didn’t you help her. Weren’t you her best friend?”  
“I tried. I went to the police station. I got a call from him the same night, telling me that if I’d try something like that ever again, or contacted Laney in any way or form, he’d do terrible, terrible things to her… I knew him, he’d do it. And just look at her. He could break her in half without putting too much effort into it.” Sans shivered as he remembered your mangled body that morning, you appeared on his and Papyrus doorstep. “How did you get her out of there?”  
“I… I don’t know, to be honest. We met her, when some punk tried to mess with Frisk-a friend of ours-and she got knocked out. And suddenly she showed up, completely wrecked. What were we supposed to do? Sent her back, so she’d get killed? Humans might be cruel, but monsters…”  
“Are made out of love and compassion, I know.”  
“Oh?”  
“Yeah, my fiancée is one, and I adore him. Never met a nicer guy!” Her face became softer as she talked. “Say, are you planning to do her any harm, Sans? Any of you?”  
“What? No!” The skeleton frowned at her words and stared into her hard, hazel eyes. “I promised her, to keep her save.”  
“Good, because if you will do anything in that direction, I will personally seek you out and make you pay for it, do you hear me?” There was a certain undertone in her voice that made him shiver. Minutes passed and neither of the two were saying anything, the only sounds were coming from your steady breathing and the clank of metal pots from the kitchen, where Papyrus was cooking something-probably spaghetti. “Her favourite food is chocolate, preferably pudding, still a bit warm and thick enough that a spoon will stand upright on its own when you put it in. If you want to make her really happy, throw some freshly cut straw- or raspberries inside.” she suddenly mumbled. “Never call her something like toots, suggartits, chick and so on. She is a queen and you will treat her with respect. When she’s in a bad mood, put on a superhero-flick, preferably marvel, but any kind is fine. Laney is Team Iron Man but secretly she thinks the Captain America movies are better, her favourite’s the team up one’s though and X-Men, especially the new ones. The more complex the costumes, the more engaged she will be, don’t ask why, she just adores awesome costume designing in movies. Never put on a romcom, they’ll get her to puke, go for psychological horror movies instead. Give her a long hug or headscratch and cuddles when she can’t sleep or had a nightmare. She takes holidays very serious and wants to make people around her happy but never counts on someone remembering her birthday. It’s September 20th, don’t forget it, but also don’t tell her. When she gets comfortable enough to hum or sing in your company don’t interrupt her, cherish the moment. And she loves puns, but also uses them to cover up her true feelings” The skeleton stared at her in total surprise while she couldn’t even muster the strength to look in his direction. “Elaine Winters is a precious little flowerchild with a heart that is bigger than she is, but if you mess with the people she loves, she has no problem fighting for them.”  
“Why are you telling me this?” Carmen turned her head, so he could see her face, a sad smile on her lips and damp eyes.  
“I wasn’t a very good friend, but I still know her very well. She likes you, and your brother and those people she told me about, feels comfortable. But there is also a lot of fear inside her. She tries to hide but… I can still see it in her eyes. She is hiding something and if she doesn’t want to tell, it must be something… huge… I just want to see her happy. She’s always been like that, not taking care of herself but of everyone else, a total Momster. Now that she is staying with you guys, I want you to know, how to treat her right, especially since… nevermind. Just… Take care of her, will you?”  
“Uuuuh, no bones about this?” Her ringlets were bouncing as she giggled a bit and grabbed her purse from her bag to pull out an old picture that already had multiple creases.  
“Thank you. Really…” Smiling, she handed him the picture. “That’s us when we were still children. We took it on my ninth birthday, it’s one of my happiest memories. Wasn’t she just the cutest? I can still remember that…” Slowly, her rambling faded out as Sans clutched the photograph, staring at the picture. Carmen didn’t change much, she still had the same exact mane, smile and dopey smile. At the time he couldn’t care less about her, not when he was looking at nine year old Elaine. You didn’t grow a lot in height, but your body did get a lot more female however. A big, happy grin spread across your flushed face, probably from playing too rough since your clothes seemed a bit dirty and your arms were scraped but you still grinned at the camera with both of our hands forming little piece signs. The blush on your face made the adorable little freckles on your cheekbones and nose stand out even more and your red eyes were almost sparkling. Your hair was different back then. You probably died and cut it. It used to be a light, warm brown, down to your shoulders and bangs, you swept to one side. Yeah, different, but also awfully familiar to him. You even had some yellow flowers and petals stuck to it, without noticing.  
“Sans… Are you alright?” He snapped back after getting nudged to side. Carmen looked at him with a worried expression. “You seem… off…”  
“No. ‘s fine, really. She looks different with black hair… Just surprised me.” The woman chuckled.  
“Yeah, she dyed it black after the accident. I was surprised as well, usually it was Lizzy who’d do crazy stuff to her hair. That girl was something else. I think at one point she had every colour of the rainbow already! Blue, red, purple, pink, orange, green, mixed… One time, she actually dyed her hair 7 different colours! Well, Laney did, Lizzy was never good with that, she always asked her big ol’ sis for help. They were so adorable, the cutest pair of siblings. They adored each other. Lizzy wanted to be exactly like her sister and she almost idolised her! Elaine doesn’t know, but that one time, someone was talking shit about her and Lizzy almost beat him up. She still thinks he was bulling her sister so she stepped in and gave him a really bad time! Laney is a pacifist by heart and would never hurt someone but damn, she is goddamn amazing at sassing people and giving them hell!” Sans still stared at the picture and forced himself to not let his smile drop.  
“SANS? UNDYNE IS HERE!” His brother shouted from the hallway. He didn’t even hear the doorbell ring. Before he could even answer, Papyrus and Undyne barged into the living room.  
“SUP NER….. Aaaaw, look at her sleeping!” Undyne cooed as she saw you. “Who the Heck are you?” Carmen just giggled.  
“Carmen Cantabella, I’m… I’m a good friend of Elaine. You must be this Undyne I’ve heard so much about.”  
“THE ONE AND ONLY, FUFUFU! NICE TO MEET YOU, PUNK!”  
“She has a… unique way of expressing her love…” Sans whispered and she giggled.  
“Wait, lemme get ahold of the smol nerd four you” Undyne said and crouched in front of you, gently poking your cheek. “Wakey wakey, tiny, nap time is over.” You started shifting and turned around to sleepily look at the giant woman. Without even thinking, you outstretched your hands in a grabby motion and she picked you up like a child. “Man, look at her, she’s clinging to me like a koala or so!”    
“m not a koala, Und’ne…” you mumbled halfassed yet wrapped your arms and legs around her a bit tighter. You could hear your friend sniffle and turned your head. “You kay, Curls?”  
“Yes, it’s just…. You guys are adorable, and I am happy to see this…”  
“You’re a Dork….” You grinned at her, still clinging to Undyne, who was talking to Papyrus, as your glance met Sans, who was still holding that picture of you and Curly as children and for just a second your heart stopped.

_Shit!_

Well, for once you and the voice inside your head where on the same fence.


	10. Back to the roots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's called trashCAN, not TrashCAN'T!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah, I've been gone for a while, whoops...  
> I'm really sorry, but life has been a bitch.  
> But I'm back again with a brand new chapter!  
> And next time... Oh boi... Next time will be fun <3

You could feel, how your intestines started to clench and for just a moment, everything seemed to slow down. A faint ringing blocked out every other sound and your heart-or what you thought more accurate, your soul-felt tight and a shiver went down your spine, as you looked at Sans, holding that old picture of you, the lights in his eyesockets flickering for just a second.  
And then it was over.  
To be honest, you were still screaming on the inside but you did a fairy good job of concealing the constant trail of thought that just wouldn’t stop going HOLY-SHIT-HE-KNOS-WE’RE-DEAD-CALM-DOWN-NONOONONO-WHAT-THE-HELL-HOLY-FUCKING-COW-DICK-WE’RE-ARE-SO-FUCKED-RUN-NO-STAY-FUCK-NO-WHAT-SHIT-WHY?! over and over again. The feeling of tiredness was wiped from you and you felt more aware than ever before.  
You didn’t know why it was so bad, that he saw or what or how much exactly he knew but… He did and you were still screaming on the inside, avoiding the skeletons gaze, when Undyne put you back down so you could say goodbye to Curly. Your best friend from back in the days hugged you closely and told you to come by and visit as soon as you could, she just had to introduce you to her fiancé but all you could do was smile and nod. Even your hug was somewhat halfassed, your mind just wasn’t there but rather still busy with screaming and panicking. The clicking of the door as it shut close sounded unnaturally loud in your ears and you lingered for a few more seconds, before you turned around, already knowing, who was awaiting you.  
Sans was leaning against the hallway wall, his never faltering grin stretched across his skull, the picture still in his hand. Your eyes flickered from his face to the photograph just for a second, before you started to smile at him.  
“Thank you for letting me invite her here, Sans. It meant a lot to me.” The skeleton seemed confused by your words, or at least, he didn’t know what to retort for a moment.  
“It’s no problem, really. But say…” You swallowed hard. “That picture of you, the one your friend gave me…”  
“Yeah, what’s up with it?” you said while tugging it out of Sans grip and chuckling at the sight. “Man, can you believe that she kept that old thing? The cameras used to be so bad. Curls can be happy, she had her eyes closed but thanks to the flash, my eyes look even redder than they are already.”  
“Heh, yeah. I’ve gotta say though, you do look rather frisky with that hair of yours back then.”  
“If that’s supposed to be a pun, Sans, I’ve got to admit that it was a rather weak one. Are you losing your edge?” A tiny smile tugged at the corners of your lips but Sans simply laughed. For some reason, it sounded rather sinister.  
He tried to say something but you couldn’t hear, since Undyne literally smashed open the door, laughing manically.  
“FUFUFUFUFUFU, NO ESCAPE FOR YOU NOW, TINY HUMAN!” she croaked as you jumped back in surprise, pressing against the entrance door.  
“I didn’t do it! I don’t know what, but it wasn’t me!” The towering Fishlady just laughed more and crossed her arms in front of her, a big, fat, winning grin almost cutting her face in half.  
“Yeah, DUH! I’M the one who did!”  
“Oh god, what’s burning this time?” You felt colour was draining from your face quickly as you quickly jogged through the hallway, trying to squeeze by. However, you didn’t manage to do so, as she simply grabbed you by the waist.  
“Nothing! I’m kidnapping you!” Confusion must have been so clearly drawn all over you, since she only started to laugh again.  
“We’ll you’re doing a miserable job, since you’re telling me… and I’m still here?”  
“NOT FOR LONG!”  
“Oh lord have mercy…” you whispered just before she hoisted you up again, a screech escaping your throat as she threw you over her shoulder like a wet potato sack. Sans, who was still in the hallway, didn’t even make an effort to conceal his fit of laughter. “UNDYNE, PUT ME DOWN!” She just ignored you and called for Papyrus, who hurried to join the three of you.  
“OH, I SEE THAT WE ARE READY TO LEAVE?” Disbelieve spread over your face and you puffed your cheeks.  
“Papyrus, tell her to put me the f……luff down or god may help you!”  
“FUFUFU, WHAT’CHA GONNA DO? Stab me?” You glared at Undyne and huffed angrily.  
“No, I’ll tell you the ending of that new anime you’re watching!” She just shrugged-hence accidentally hitting you in the stomach with her shoulder-and laughed.  
“Worth it!”  
“I’ll spoiler Alphys!” you growled and she just gasped.  
“You wouldn’t dare!” Sans opened the door and the four of you left the apartment, even if not on own accounts.  
“Try me, bitch…” You muttered under your breath.

 

About a 15 minute walk later Undyne kicked open the door of a small house with a neat little garden in the front and trees in the back. It looked so peacefully and suburban, that you couldn’t help but admire and envy it, even with your now permanent grumpy puffed cheeks and crossed arms, still hanging over the blue, muscular shoulder. Papyrus and Sans were following you, the tall skeleton discussing so called “Spaghetti techniques” with Undyne and the shorter one making mad puns on your behalf like he’s been put on rabbit fire mode. Once the front door was closed, you could hear the small pitter-patter of feet, as two people approached them. Since you couldn’t see what was going on, you had no idea who it could be, but you had some suspicions.  
“U-Undyne!” Oh! You remembered, that was the voice of the rather shy lizard, you’ve seen before, Alphys! “Y-You’re here! We’ve b-been waiting for you g-guys!”  
“Sorry, but I had to persuade the tiny human!” ‘Persuade’, my ass!  
“You know, I still have a name…” you muttered grumpily.  
“A-Are they okay?” Alphys seemed honestly concerned but Undyne just turned around so you could face them. Your grumpy expression did not falter but for once in your life you were taller than someone that wasn’t a 12 year old.  
“I hate everything and I am not here on my own accords!” you growled. Frisk, who was standing next to Alphys, snickered and you stuck out your tongue at them. The kid just did the same, so you ended up making even sillier faces towards each other. Slowly, the smile came back to your face. A third pair of feet came along through a room that smelled suspiciously of cookies. Just a second later Toriel emerged and immediately clasped her hands over her mouth.  
“Oh dear, Undyne!” She gasped. “Release them this instance!” The Blue Beauty jolted in surprise and turned again, effectively bumping your head on a wall. You bit your tongue to not swear in front of the kid or Papyrus, but it seemed worth it, as Undyne put you down, an apologetic grin on her face and an utterly scary look as Toriels.  
“Someone is in trouble now~” you quietly said in a sing-sang voice, and Undyne nudged your side. You only snickered and followed Frisk, who was pulling your sleeve upstairs. As soon as you were gone, you could hear the Goat Monster scolding Undyne and chuckled again.  
Frisk ahead of you always jumped with every step and had such a huge grin plastered on their face that you couldn’t help but smile.  
“Say, where are we going?”  
My room! Mom said, that the others should bring you over for dinner, because it’s about time and she can give you the clothes and stuff she promised you!  
“Oh, that is so sweet of y…”  
And we’ve got a surprise for you! They interrupted you and you staggered for a second.  
“A… surprise?”  
Yep! Me and Undyne thought it up! And Alphys helped! And Sans of course! Mom said it’s okay to do it here, gives her an excuse to fuzz all over you. They started snickering for a second. And Papyrus is just happy, I guess  
“Isn’t Paps always happy?”  
Yeah, but I mean… REALLY happy!  
For a second you considered asking again, but quickly abandoned that thought, as Frisk opened their door and dragged you inside. The room was a bit messy, but nothing you wouldn’t expect from a child.  
Sorry, for not cleaning but I thought, now that you live with Sans, you’ve seen real terror, so why bother.  
You just laughed and sat down on the floor. As you sat down, the photograph of you and Curly slipped out of your pocket but before you could pick it up again, Frisk had snatched it. Their hands trembled, as they looked at it.  
“Hey, what’s up? It’s just an old picture of me and a friend?” you asked, your brows furrowed. “Sans got all weird too, when he saw.”  
You look like…  
“You, I know. I’ve realised that too. Except for the eyes. Oh, and freckles of course.” You laughed and brushed through your jagged hair. “I actually like my freckles to be honest and-hey, where are you going?” Frisk had dropped the picture again and jumped onto their bed, grabbing something from under the pillow. “Frisk?” The child joined you again and thrusted something into your hand. It was surprisingly cool and felt heavy, even though it was so tiny. You shot them a confused glance but they just nodded. Carefully, you opened your hand and stared down at the simple but beautiful heart shaped locked that was lying on the palm of your hand. The exterior was a warm gold with a few scratches, bumps and dark spots on it already. Your heart felt so heavy and even the voice inside your head kept quiet for once. Very carefully, you turned it around, even though you already knew what would be there.  
The sloppily engraved _Best Friends Forever_.  
You could feel an unfamiliar, sharp pain in your heart area and tried to swallow. Why did this mean so much to you?  
“Frisk, I don’t… I can’t… Why…” You were at a loss of words but the child just smiled at you, the tiny hands slowly signing something.  
It’s okay. You need it more than I do. It helped me once before as well…  
Your eyes were burning with tears, as you held onto it but it felt so right. Just where it belonged, you thought. At least you thought it was you. But it did feel right. And made you feel save and protected. Since you didn’t know what to say anymore, you just hugged Frisk for a long time and they reciprocated gladly.  
Still, it was a pretty weird hug. It didn’t feel like it should be you who-oh!  
Suddenly, everything clicked and you couldn’t help but smile as you closed your eyes and hugged Frisk a bit tighter. The quiet “Thank you” certainly wasn’t yours either.  
After the two of you parted, neither of you spoke-as far as you can count sign language as actual speaking and not as a form of communicating, but yeah, you weren’t doing sign as well-because neither knew what to actually say. So you just sat there in comfortable silence for a few minutes before you got up in quiet understanding to join the others downstairs. As you were walking down the stairs, you put the necklace around your neck and fastened the clasp in the back before you shoved it under your shirt. The smooth metal felt cool against your skin but also like it was somewhat pulsing, alive. It felt right that you had it, the small locket fit snuggle right under your collar bone and it was as if it’s always been there.  
Weird.  
Frisk was looking at you from the side but you just smiled at them as sweet as a button, hiding all of our real emotions behind that smile but they didn’t seem to notice but rather gave you an adorable smile themselves. Of course, how would they have noticed? No one ever managed to do so, besides Sans. But Sans was…  
Well… Sans was special. Lost in thought, you started biting your lip, as you followed the small kid ahead. Yeah, Sans was something different. He managed to look right through you but he was still nice to you, something you couldn’t understand. And not understanding why he was still kind and friendly to you confused and scared you. Especially after you saw the look on his face when he got hands on the picture of you as a child. It was so odd that it actually got to you so much. But Frisk reacted weirdly to it as well. Was it because you looked so similar? Or was it because of…  
_Watch out!_  
You blinked as that tiny voice whispered to you again and then you jumped, as the smooth and silky “Oh my~” right next to you startled you. You weren’t exactly swearing but a weird noise left your throat and you were flailing like an octopus with a seizure. Undyne snorted loudly and only now you realised that you were back in the living room. Well, not back, but Frisk lead you there. You shot the blue fish a quick death glare as she was still cackling and then turned back to the owner of the voice that almost made your heart stop.  
And then your heart stopped again.  
Holy shit, was that….?  
“And you, darling, must be Elaine” The tall, gorgeous robot purred, his metal lips curling into a smile as he scanned you. You must be dreaming. This can’t be true. It’s absolutely impossible that your favourite TV star was standing right in front of you, in the flesh!  
Well, not really in the flesh, since he was made out of Metal and Magic but still, either you were dead, probably fell down the stairs, or Undyne knocked you unconscious when she bumped your head before. Yes, that must have been it. Never ever would Mettaton himself just show up here, nonetheless know your name. Or call you darling!  
You must have looked like you suffered from a severe brain damage since Mettatons expression started to shift from delighted to slightly worried. “Is everything alright, Sweetie?”  
“nghwktbehgwl” You could have punched yourself in the face. Not one for the history books, well done you dumbnut. The situation was not improved by Undynes cackling, who, as it appeared to you, seemed to find the whole situation incredibly funny.  
“Oh, I… Excuse me?” The robot seemed even more bewildered now and you quickly shook your head and told yourself to get a grip, even though it’s hard when your idol was right in front of you and probably thought of you as some demented, braindead loaf. Nevertheless you put on a winning smile-or something you though a winning smile must look like-and tried very hard not to drool or faint. Just try to be cool, smooth and not creepy at all! Play it safe and-  
“Can I have your autograph?” What the fuck is wrong with you, you moron? Yeah, totally cool and smooth, he won’t think that you are just some idiotic lunatic now. Well done.  
While you were putting yourself down and wishing for the earth to just open up underneath you, so it could swallow you as a whole, Mettatons face seemed to light up and a delighted expression overtook it, a great, lovely smile stretching across it, just like the one you saw on TV-just…try not to squeal, or at least do it on the inside please!-and he started to laugh as he turned to everyone else sitting on the couch.  
“Ohohohoho~ You didn’t tell me that she was a fan of mine!” Only now you managed to tear you lingering gaze away from Mettaton and look at the others. Everyone except Undyne-who was clearly having the time of her life and wouldn’t stop laughing-seemed relaxed and amused rather than impressed and stunned by the sheer… Mettatonness in the room. Oh, and Sans. The shorter Skeleton somehow had a gloomy expression on his face, as he watched you embarrass yourself more and more. He was also the one, who answered.  
“Didn’t know she was. After all, there are a lot of things we don’t know, right?” Your stomach dropped at this, but you kept smiling at him.  
“Yeah, go figure, it’s not like I’m some kind of complex human being with layers and different interests that I don’t wear around my neck as a list. Who could have thought?” Why was he so grumpy that you were a tad excited?  
You could feel a sleek metal hand running through your hair but to your surprise it didn’t feel icy at all. It rather felt very human like, maybe just a little bit colder but only barely noticeable. Surprised, you looked back at the robot who was examining your roughly cut hair very closely, the lips drawn into a pout.  
“Oh yes, I can clearly see what they were talking about! This certainly is a very spooky hair situation right here.”  
“Yeah, you could even call it a paranormal hairtivity if you want to” you retorted, not thinking who you were speaking too. It still bothered you extremely, that Sans was acting so aloof. He didn’t even laugh at your stupid pun. And he definitely heard it, since papyrus was already complaining about it and how you weren’t a bit better than his brother. Oh, bless his innocent, sweet soul.  
The idol robot was still busy examining your hair while he answered you in an amused tone.  
“I see, you have quite the humour, dear! Let’s home your jokes have a bit more style than… others.” He obviously glared at Sans while saying this who gladly replied in the same way. There was obviously some bad blood going on you didn’t know about. “But oh darling, whatever happened to those gorgeous locks! Who could do such a horrible thing? Your hairstylist must have been a monster! And not one of our kind, if you understand” He certainly did have a knack for drama, dear Mettaton, but the story of your “new haircut” wasn’t an exceptionally fun one.  
“Well, my hairstylist was my instinct of preservation, since I did it myself.” You smiled at the stunned robot. “Tried to run away but got grabbed. And if I have to choose, I would always choose between my hair and my life, the hair clearly wins.” Your voice was sweet as anything but there was a certain harshness in it, only barely audible. Looking at Mettaton, you thought that you went too far but when he scooped you up into an enormous hug you lost all confidence and turned back into the flustered, blushy girl.  
“Oh you brave girl! Don’t worry! You are safe with us now and your hair won’t be any problem either! Short styles are totally in right now anyways!” You looked at Toriel who just shrugged and smiled gently at you.  
“We thought that you might want to get rid of the bad memories tied to it.” She simply explained and Frisk, who was sitting on their mothers lap nodded excitedly.  
No one’s better with that stuff than TonTon! They exclaimed and grinned sheepishly. Trust him, he knows what he’s doing…. I think!  
Sans still didn’t look happy, when Mettaton-or TonTon as Frisk had so adorably called him- dragged you out of the room and it bothered you even more.

Okay, Mettator certainly did know his stuff, as he dragged you upstairs into the bathroom where he already prepared a lot of… stuff. You can’t even specify it, it was just so much! And in the middle of the room he had placed a comfortable looking chair you were now sitting on. You didn’t know what to say, so you just stood there, fiddling with your thumbs as he rummaged around the room, obviously preparing something. After five minutes or so you finally gathered enough courage to speak up again. He was so much more intimidating when you were alone with him. And it had only partially to do with the fact that he was your favourite TV Star.  
“Uuuh, excuse me, Mr Mettaton but… what exactly is going on here?” He didn’t halt to answer you but continued to do… things. Beauty related things. Beauty related things you had no idea off.  
“Oh, I’m doing your hair.”  
“Oh, okay, if it’s just tha-what?”  
“Yes, yes! I think it was Frisks idea? Or Undyne, I am not certain of it! But it definitely is a kind gesture, so you should appreciate it! And a new hairstyle always boosts your confidence and self-esteem! Oh, and it helps with men too, you know.” He winked at you and you blushed.  
“W-what?”  
“Oh, honey. You might be able to fool the others but I can clearly see that you and Sans are very fond of each other!” His voice was suddenly very soft and kind. Your face, on the other side, was burning hot like it’s on fire.  
“H-Hey! No, he’s just… he helped me a lot lately! And kept me safe from… the badness! That’s all!” The robot just chuckled.  
“If you say so darling. But one should never hide their feelings.”  
“If…you say so?” His words confused you, what was he talking about? You had no time whatsoever to ponder furthermore as he started brushing through your hair again.  
“Oh, and what am I gonna do with you now?”  
“I don’t know, style it?”  
“Yes, but the possibilities are endless, love!” He seemed truly invested and you giggled. Then suddenly, his sight fell onto the picture of you as a child that was poking out of your pocket and he snatched it away from you before you could say anything. “Aha! What do we have here?”  
“That’s… That’s nothing! Just an old photograph!”  
“It might be old but you were a very lovely child. And you looked remarkably like dear Frisk, I must say so. If it weren’t for the eyes, you could think that the two of you might be siblings.” A smile lingered on your face as you took back the picture, looking at it yourself.  
“Yeah, we do look very similar. But I have to admit, I loved the hair. Colour, cut, everything… Bummer I had to dye it dark later on. I hated the black ringlets…”  
“They do make you look rather pale, you are right…” Mettaton admitted, something clearly going on in his mind. Suddenly, he beamed at you again. “You know what dear. We should go back to the roots. Quite literally.”


	11. Do you wanna have a bad time? -No thank you!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As someone in the comments stated so accurately:  
> WELP FUCK, HERE COMES THE SHITSTORM. Be prepared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahaha, oups. 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> pleasedontkillme

_He never noticed how loud the steps were echoing through judgment hall as the human approached him. This was not the first time this has happened, and it sure as hell wouldn’t be the last one. Waking up just to see everything reset again, over and over and over had made him tired, oh so tired. He’s seen it countless times, a human would come down here and things… were getting weird. Sometimes they didn’t kill, sometimes they did it to defend themselves, other times it’s just because they get tired of dying over and over again. But there are a few occasions, where they just…_

_Kill._

_Kill everything they see and more often than not, deliberately seek out for their victims until no one is left, except for Sans. They always ended up right here, in judgment hall._

_This time has been especially cruel. Not only, did they kill everyone but they managed to pander to everyone, fool them, and when their victim would be at their weakest, they would strike for a betrayal kill._

_The echo suddenly stopped, as the human stopped right in front of him. It was so weird, seeing Frisk with those red, gleaming eyes, devoid of all emotion._

_“heya. You've been busy, huh?... So, i've got a question for ya. Do you think even the worst person can change...? That everyone can be a good person, if they just try? heh heh heh heh... All right. Well, here's a better question._

_Do you wanna have a bad time?_

_Cause if you take another step forward... you are REALLY not going to like what happens next.”_

_He knew that they’d still walk towards him, eager to just get it over with and sprinkle the floor with the last person that could still put up a fight here._

_“Welp. Sorry, old lady. This is why i never make promises.”_

_They started to do the same dance as they did before, over and over and over, so perfectly practised, without a single flaw. Even his lines, his text, so carefully repeated…  
“it's a beautiful day outside. birds are singing, flowers are blooming... on days like these, kids like you..._

_S h o u l d   b e   b u r n i n g   i n   h e l l .”_

_It would end. Sometime in the future… It would end. Either of them would die for good and they’d just reset. It was just a waiting game, be patient, he told himself. One of them would die and it would be over. He’d see his brother again, Undyne, Alphys, Asgore, Toriel and Frisk, the real Frisk. And maybe, next time, they could have a happy end, where no one had to die and they could get out of this rotten place for good._

_The thought alone gave him enough strength to finally push one of his attacks, a sharpened bone right through the humans’ chest. They fell back over, an insane grin spread across their face and he landed on top of them, straddling the small frame. He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. Maybe it would be over already. Maybe they wouldn’t come back but rather reset immediately._

_“I thought… You’d protect me…” The rattling cough of a way too familiar voice made him snap back into the reality that was going right now and not what could have been. Red eyes were still staring at him from a beaten, bruised face, covered in blood but it wasn’t the human he had fought previously. Your black hair was spread around your head like some kind of reversed halo, your chest barely moving anymore as you took a rattling wheeze. Disbelief crossed his mind, nononono, this couldn’t be real. This couldn’t be you. He was just fighting Frisk, a possessed Frisk, trying to kill everyone. You’d never… He never wanted…  
And yet, here you were, impaled by-what was unmistakably-his bone, the very bone he had sharpened to ram right through the humans soul. But not yours, never yours. He couldn’t, he wouldn’t… Your so fragile soul, not even strong enough to be drawn out without hurting you. _

_He never wanted to hurt you, not when he…_

_Your pale hand slowly reached out for him, touching his cheekbone. He could feel the blood on it, smearing all over his white skull._

_“Sans…. Why…?” Your voice was so pained and with a last final choking pant, the shaking hand fell back to the ground, your eyes now empty and devoid of all life._

_“Elaine..?” he finally managed to whisper, carefully touching your shoulder. When you didn’t react, he tried to shake you a bit more, saying your name louder but you still didn’t stir. His desperation grew by the second, desperately trying to get you to wake you up, clutching your lifeless, dead corpse, frantically sobbing. “Nonono, why are you here, please wake up, please… Elaine!” But you’d never wake up again._

_And it was his fault._

And with a jolt, he woke up, staring at Toriels Ceiling.

 

 

 

Getting used to your new hair would take some time, you thought, looking at the bathroom mirror. You’ve just been getting accustomed to the jagged, black locks and suddenly, everything was different again. Well, not too different though. Mettaton had been inspired by your old picture, even though it wasn’t an exact copy. Your hair was now a warm chocolate brown again that brought out your freckles and blushy cheeks and made your eyes sparkle in a brilliant burgundy colour. The hair was bit longer, just enough so you could tie it in the back or into a small ballerina bun. Right now, you’ve left it open, just getting used to the long side swept bangs. All in all, you really liked what he did with your hair. You looked so much more… alive now, still pale as a sheet or piece of toast but not as zombielike. It was so much more… you. You’ve always hated the black.

A delicate knock at the door made you turn away from the mirror and put down the hairbrush.   
“Yes?”

“It is I, Toriel, my child! May I enter?”

“Yeah, sure.” You smiled widely, as you opened up the door. When the queen looked at you, she winced for a second and averted her eyes. You only laughed at her in a friendly manner. “That bad? And I thought that he’s done quite a fine job.” Toriel, of course, laughed with you and simply shook her head. You thought that she looked exceptionally pretty today.

“No, of course not. It suits you very well. Its just…”

“Unfamiliar, I know.” You smiled a bit wider and a bit kinder as you finished her sentence in understanding. She just nodded. “But say, what did you want?”

“What? Oh, of course!” She laughed again, slightly aloof. “I promised you, my child, to give you knew clothes. I still have a few things that are… your size. If you still want them, of course.”

“Oh my, Toriel, that would be so kind of you!” smiling, she lead the way to her own room, where she opened up a large box full of clothes and things that have obviously belonged to someone else before. Both of you settled down on the floor, as she started to unpack with shaky fingers. “Miss Toriel, are you sure, that it’s alright, that I…”

“Yes, my child! No one has worn these things in years anyways…” A sudden sharp sensation, as if someone has stabbed you right through the heart rippled through your chest and made you gasp. “Are you alright?” The motherly instincts of the goat woman seemed to have kicked in, one of her soft and gentle hands on your back.

“Yes, just…. Choked on my own spit” you laughed but neither of you were convinced.

“If… you say so, my child…. Why don’t you try some of these on, while I go through the rest?” You just nodded and grabbed the first pair of pants and sweater that you could reach. Lucky for you, Toriel hat a huge walk-in-closet, where you could change. Looking at you in the mirror, you had to smile. The brown, ¾ pants were hugging your legs nicely, ending just a few inches above the knee and made your but look really great. On top, you were wearing a bright emerald green turtleneck-sweater with one yellow stripe straight across the chest. You were still wearing your favourite brown ankleboots, the ones with the heel that made you look taller and more feminine and out of the soft suede. Your black stockings ended just under your knees, so there was still skin showing between them and the pants. The whole outfit looked so goshdarn adorable, you couldn’t help yourself but giggle as you turned and twisted your body, looking in the giant mirror. You didn’t take off the locket overnight-mostly since everbody was already fast asleep once you were done with your makeover-so it was glimmering in the warm light of the lamp. The soft gold pranged on your chest and made the whole outfit complete in your eyes. Humming, you left with your old clothes clutched under your arm.

“So, what do you think?” You beamed at Tori, who had turned her back on you. “I think you were pretty right, these things are just my size! Weird, huh? But I think it’s pretty cute on me!” Toriel, however, did not reply to you at all, or at least what you said. Once her eyes fell upon you, she let out a tiny, surprised scream, before she covered her mouth with her hands. “Miss Toriel? Are you alright?” You hurried over to her, worried beyond belief. “If you don’t like it, I can change back, really!”

“Nono, it’s alright, my ch-child!” she stammered and you could see that her eyes were filling up with tears. Following your instinct, you put your arms around her, pulling her into a tight hug.

“Whatever I did, I am sorry. I am sorry, I upset you…” you mumbled, feeling like the scum of the earth, upsetting Toriel, when she showed you nothing but kindness ever since you’ve met her. She let out a shaky breath and returned the long hug, clinging onto you, as if you’d be gone forever if she’d let you go.

“It is not your fault, my dear, I am sorry.” After, what felt like an eternity, she let go of you, but you still sat down next to her, legs crossed. “It is just-where did you get that locket?” Surprised, you touched it.

“Frisk gave it to me, why?” The queen only furrowed her brows and grabbed an old, faded picture from the bottom of the box, handing it to you. It showed Toriel, someone, who you figured would be her husband, Asgoro or something along those lines as well as two children. One of them looked just like his parents, an adorable little white goat monster, smiling into the camera. And the other one was… “Why am I in this picture, Miss Toriel?” you asked carefully.

“That is exactly the reason, I reacted so appalled, my dear.” She explained quietly. Your soul made another throb. “For it isn’t you. It couldn’t…”

“What do you mean?”

“That child in this picture, the one that shares a remarkable resemblance with you, used to be my child, long ago, just like the one next to him.” Tears were glistening in her eyes as she continued to speak. “They died a long time ago, so seeing you right now, gave me a real surprise.”

“How… How did you lose them?” Your voice was full of empathy and your face pained. You couldn’t remember your chest being so heavy in quite a while.

“My youngest, a human child, very much like Frisk, fell down with a severe sickness. It was not a nice way to go, long and painful, but there was nothing we could do, no matter how hard we tried. Chara-that’s what they were called-wouldn’t tell us what was actually wrong with them, so I couldn’t help them. And the doctors weren’t fast enough to find a cure. So they died and I had failed them as mother. Charas brother, Asriel, was so struck by grief, unwilling to let his sibling and best friend go, that he merged with the human soul. He took Charas body and crossed the barrier, trying to find the place of which they’ve talked about so much, so he could bury the body among the flowers. But he got ambushed by humans. When he came back, he fell down, his body turning to dust before it hit the ground. I’ve lost both of my children in one night!” she sobbed, now hugging you again. Why did you feel so guilty, why was there such a vast and deep rooted pain inside your chest.

“Toriel, I…. I don’t know what to say. It must have been so hard…. You are so brave and strong, still standing so upright and acting as a beacon of kindness! I’m sure…” You swallowed hard. “They both loved you, so much, and they didn’t want you to be so upset or throw away your life just because they are gone.” The goat woman just nodded quickly, sniffling loudly.   
_Mom…._

“Of course, you are right… I am so sorry, I burdened you with this kind of story.” You only shook your head, smiling at her.

“Please, don’t apologise for that. I am glad, that you can talk to me this freely. And I am so thankful for everything you’ve done for me, the least I can do is listen to you and try to help.” Toriel gave you another long hug and neither of you spoke as you went through more of the contents of the old box, until a very excited Undyne and Papyrus crashed through the door, asking if they needed anything from the grocery store as well. Toriel just smiled and asked you, if you could have an eye on Frisk, so she could join the two of them. You smiled and waved dismissively.

“Don’t mention it, Miss Toriel. I’ll be glad to watch them!” On the way downstairs, you were informed, that Alphys had already left for work and Sans was still fast asleep on the couch, so you had to be careful to not wake him up. Frisk was up in their room. It took you quite a while to get the three of them out of the house but you managed at last and made your way up to Frisks room. Halfway down you had to halt, as you felt something trickle down your cheek. Surprised you reached up, just to see a teardrop glistening on your finger. Curious, you thought, very curious… You didn’t feel seed and you didn’t even notice that you were…

_Those aren’t your tears…_

Oh.

There was this terrible sting in your soul again.

 

“Oh damn it!” You muttered under your breath, quickly putting the cut finger into your mouth and sucking at it. The now blood-stained knife was still in your other hand and Frisk pulled on the sleeve of your sweater with worry written all over their face.

_Are you okay?_

“Yeah, don’t worry” you mumbled and took the finger out with a pop. It wasn’t bleeding much anymore and the cut wasn’t too deep. After an hour or so of waiting, the child had grown impatient and asked you, if you could cook them up. They just couldn’t wait for their mother to come back, they would surely starve in the meantime. How could you have said no to such a sweet and cute little face?  
Sans was still fast asleep when you came through, determined to not wake him up. He looked so peaceful and rather cute while he was sleeping. Usually, there was a lot of strain on his face, constant worry and something lurking behind. But when he was sleeping, it was as if all of those things were wiped off of the pure, off-white skull. Even his smile seemed more relaxed. The view alone made you smile as well and you could feel your dimples showing.   
You gave your finger a last displeased look, before you noticed the water for the pasta bubble up and started to turn down the heat. Papyrus and the others would be glad to get their hands on some Spaghetti-Papyrus’ and Undynes favourite dish-once they’d be back. A short glance at the ovenclock confirmed your suspicions on how long they’ve been gone and you guessed that they would be back any minute now. Toriel probably used the occasion to go and buy all of her necessities, now that she had two very helpful people with her. Lunch was almost done as well. You grabbed the pot from the stove and poured out the contents into a sieve and holding the noodles under cold water. The sauce was also done already, all that was left for you to do was finishing cutting up some fresh tomatoes and it was ready to be served. Frisk had already busied themselves with preparing the table. You smiled at them and listened to their blabber-well, watched, as the child still communicated through sign language only. You wondered why though. They weren’t completely mute, they could laugh and giggle and yelp after all but they still chose not to. Sometimes, you felt sadness wash over you, thinking about what must have caused their selective muteness. And then even more determination, to keep them save from everything that would harm them, to protect them and never let them get hurt like that again.

“Papyrus?” Sans suddenly called from the living room, and you had to smile. The lazybones had finally woken up.   
Suddenly, they stopped an expression of great shock on the small face.   
“Frisk?” you asked but just as you opened your mouth, you could feel it too. The sensation was similar to being drenched in ice water by surprise and for some reason, you had goosebumps and a chill ran down your spine. Your soul felt tight and contorted, breathing was hard for a second. This felt so dangerous and yet… familiar? A bright flash, a burning hot singeing and the smell of burned flesh crossed your mind and you shivered again. You noticed that you had grabbed the knife, that was still stained with your blood by instinct and shoved Frisks smaller frame behind you, ready to defend them against…. Against what?   
The child whimpered.

“Papyrus..?” Sans voice sounded strained and hurt, barely more than a groan, as he called out for his brother. “Papyrus…!” he shouted again, more desperate now. Something crashed in the living room and you swallowed hard. The weird sensation was coming closer.

_Be careful…_

Yeah, no shit, thank you very much.

“Tori? Undyne?” Frisk was holding on tight to your arm and you swallowed hard. As the weird force closed in more and more you felt like vomiting all of a sudden, more flashes of gruesome sceneries appearing in your head. Sans staggered to the kitchen entrance.

 _He is not himself…_ The voice inside your head whispered cautiously and you swallowed hard.

The skeleton had his face in his hands, the weird blue aura you’ve seen before was back. Looking at him was hard, it felt like there were particles shifting around him, constantly, over and over again. A blue light was shining through his phalanges. You tried to let go of the kitchen knife in your hand but you couldn’t, as if someone was forcibly holding your fist closed with all their might. Confused, you furrowed your brows. He moaned again.   
“Pap… Papyrus… Where is Papyrus… Or the others…?” Gathering all of your courage, and swallowing a bunch of times, you managed to speak up, surprised how calm and collected you sounded. Maybe because you feared that showing your emotions would manage to get you hurt again, just like it was back then with Hugh.

“They are gone already…” Sans skull snapped up, looking straight at you. You’ve never seen something like this, yet it was so familiar to you. The empty, black socket, the other one illuminated by what appeared to be a blue and yellowish flickering fire as an eye. He didn’t even seem to be listening anymore.

“You…?”

“They will be back soon, Sans! Any minute now!” you whispered, and Frisk clung to your arm, tugging at it. Pure disbelief and sheer anger seemed to have taken over Sans face, the broad smile was now frightening you instead of drawing you in.

“What have you done to them?” he snarled and you could feel the colour drain from your face. “What have you done to Frisk?”

“Frisk what is he talking about?” But the child only signed _reset_ over and over again. Sans growled again, the eye was now glowing brighter as you shifted the grip on the knife a little bit.

 _He is confused by the timelines and resets…_ you heard again, this time less than a voice inside your head and more like a whisper from behind your shoulder _. He mistakes you for another he has met before…_

You could hear voices shout from the entrance hall, as the door opened with its usual loud bang. Taking a deep breath, you raised your hands in a somewhat calming demeanour, still unable to let go of the knife that was stained with your own blood from the little accident.

“Sans, everything is alright. Your brother….”

“Don’t talk about him, you…” There was so much hate in his voice and you shut your mouth with an audible snap. You just needed to stall a bit more time; the voices were getting closer and closer. “I can end this now. Once and for all.” Oh shit. Frisk was clearly shivering but you had to stay calm, for their sake. Even if there were just a few… extremely intimidating looking bones hovering around him. A deep serenity overcame you and you closed your eyes.

_You know what we have to do… He’ll attack us, because of…_

Your eyes snapped open and you gave Sans a wide smile. The light in his eye flickered for just a second.

_He doesn’t recognise you.._

‘I know, and that’s exactly what I’m playing at!’ you whispered back. “Sans!” you said, this time louder. “You are right, this needs to end.” He simply growled. You could hear the voices in the hallway hush all of a sudden; they must have noticed something was wrong. “Just you and me, what do you say?” Frisk was tugging at your sleeve, pointing at the kitchen door that opened again. A piercing, yellow eye was peering into the room. You could hear Undyne hiss a muttered swear and hissing to the others. Quietly, she started creeping into the room, hiding behind the counter. Sans was so occupied with you that he didn’t even notice.

“Elaine! What’s going on? What happened to Sans?” She was hissing to you. You were still trying to smile, not moving your lips as you spoke in a quiet demeanour.

“I… He must have had a nightmare about the underground. Thinks I’m one of the evil humans…. Killing everyone…” The blue fish let out a quiet swear.

“Oh god damn it, not again!”

“Again???” you hissed, your mask faltering for a second. Sans seemed to have caught on, that something was wrong; Frisk still seemed terrified. “Nevermind. Most importantly, get the child out of here!” said child looked at you in complete and utter shock and disbelief, clinging onto you. “So! Just you and me, skeleton?” You drawled at Sans, flipping the kitchen knife again, your smile widen.

“You and me!” he confirmed.

“Elaine, are you mad!” Undyne cried out, Sans gaze flickering to her hiding place in suspicion. “You can’t fight him alone, he’ll kill you.” This time, your laugh was real.

“Don’t worry, Undyne… I’m not gonna…” A confident smirk on your face, you did something, you haven’t done in years.

Draw out your own soul.

The almost cartoony shaped heart was hovering just a few inches above the palm of your hand, a brilliant black colour, almost like a gemstone. You’ve only seen it once before, but back then, it still had its colour.

_You ready?_

Frisk next to you had made an audible gasp, letting go of your arm as if it burnt them. You knew what they must be seeing right now; the looming figure behind you, the arms lazily draped over your shoulder, hands around your soul. They seemed so ethereal, not really there, something like a ghost or a mirage but still, so clearly visible, so similar looking to you, as if you’ve had your own mirror image stuck to you.

And then you heard something, you’ve never heard before: Frisks trembling voice.

“Chara….”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I've dropped the bomb. Have Fun with the badness 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> pleasedontkillme


	12. The easiest enemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing really interesting at all is gonna happen. NOTHING AT ALL, YOU HEAR?

The second Frisk had spoken-holy SHIT, THEY TALKED?-Undyne jumped up from their hideout, grabbed the child and broke into a sprint.  
“Wha-Undyne…?” Sans muttered, his eye glowing unnaturally sinister. Just when she was about to reach the door, her path got blocked by his bones. “What are you doing? How are you…” His voice was little more than a nasty growl.  
“Sans you are not yourself. Stop this!”  
“I’m trying! I’m trying to make it stop, all of the resets and…” He seemed so desperate and your soul, the deep black heart in front of you twitched at his words, hard enough for you to actually see it.  
_He just wants it to end…_  
‘Yes, we need to do something…’  
_And what? His magic is overwhelming him? All of the resets must have… gotten to him? And since the option ‘flight’ has been scrapped from the fight or flight method, there is only one way left._  
‘Yeah, fight…’  
_Oh no!_  
‘What?’  
_You are thinking of something stupid again!_  
‘What me? Never! I might have an idea to fix this though…’  
_I don’t like your ideas._  
‘Honestly? Cry me a river!’ you chuckled and cleared your throat. “Hey!” you shouted, shifting the bloody knife in your hand once more, the crooked grin still on your face. Sans focus shifted from Undyne and Frisk back to you, the light in his eye twitching again.  
“I thought it’s just gonna be us? If you’re busy with other things, I’ll just-“  
_Duck!_  
You only had about a split second to react, before the sharpened bone, zoomed past you.  
“Jesus FUCK!” you swore. Okay, this meant business. Sans was not here to play around. You could see that Undyne used the distraction to dive through the door, slamming it shut behind her.  
_Okay, what’s the plan…_  
‘I need to get to him…’  
_There are easier things to do… dying for example. But fine._  
Taking a deep breath, you straightened up again. The knife in your hand was reflecting the blue light that came from Sans. Drawing out your heart had started the fight and just like before, your stats were still fucked up. Your LV was a glitched out zero, your HP a black mess, the numbers unreadable. Seeing this, you frowned for a second, you had hoped that it would have changed but some things… can’t be reversed as it seems. Another bone zoomed past you, missing you just about.  
_We need to do something… now!_  
With a sharp nod, you started to dash towards Sans, avoiding his attacks, on the occasion slashing through one of the bones when they couldn’t be dodged in time. He was so close; you just had to get a few inches closer. One of his attacks was directed towards the black heart. You tried to jump towards him, but the gravity of the situation shifted abruptly, your soul now engulfed in the deep blue light, you’ve seen before and you hit the floor with a hard thump. Your health bar was going crazy again, stars were dancing in front of your eyes and you could taste blood in your mouth.  
“Asshole…” you muttered, getting up again, your legs all shaky. To your own frustration, he had pushed you back again, so you were basically back at the beginning.  
“Something wrong? You don’t look too happy, pal…” This time, it was your turn to growl at him, wiping away the blood from your face. Without another word, you went into a sprint again, avoiding his attacks as good as you could. Bless those memories, that weren’t really yours, but still etched their way into your brain. He still hasn’t changed much, or maybe, after the first few resets, you just fall into some kind of mundane routine. And those are really hard to get rid of. You had to admit though, it made it way easier for you to doge his attacks, without getting yourself killed ag-  
_No!_  
You could feel it, as Chara grabbed your soul, pulling it to the side and basically flinging you out of the way, a burning hot beam just barely missing you, singeing your leg. You held back a pained scream, as you fell, your leg unable to carry your weight momentarily. Terrified, you looked up at the gigantic canine skull, looming over you. Blue tinted smoke was curling around its mouth, opening up again. Swearing like an old sailor’s hag, you dived out of the way, avoiding the energy beam.  
“I DON’T REMEMBER THOSE, WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?” You screamed at the ghostly aura attached to you.  
_Of course you wouldn’t, who would want to remember something like the Gaster Blasters! And trust me, it hurts more if they catch you._  
‘Oh no shit, I expected a walk in the park, maybe a picnic and some flowers, you know!’ Dodging more of Sans bones, you gritted your teeth. ‘I need an update of the situation right now!’  
_Sans. 1 ATK 1DEF. The easiest enemy. Can only deal 1 damage._  
‘BULLSHIT!’ you cried out again. ‘Easiest enemy, my ass, he almost took off my leg with that thing there!’  
_I’m only telling you what the flavour text says…_  
‘Fuck your flavour text…’ you muttered again, slicing a bone in half that was heading straight for your face. But it got your gears going wild in your head. ‘Chara, that thing with the soul… where you flung me through the room…’  
“Let’s just get it over with!” Sans was growling at you, the look on his face getting more and more frustrated every second you were still standing.  
“Fine, if you say so!” you spat at him, once again, breaking into a sprint towards him.  
“Didn’t we establish already, that I won’t let you reach me?” A smile crossed your face.  
“I don’t need to reach you, I just need to get close enough!” His browbone furrowed in confusion, but you ignored it, putting all of your strength into your arm, throwing the stained kitchen knife at him with all you’ve got. It would do, you knew. You just knew.  
And, you were right.  
The blade sired right by him, getting suck in the wall behind him, mere millimetres from his head away. Overcome by complete shock and surprise, he turned towards the shaking knife. That’s all you needed. You could feel the familiar tug on your soul, sliding across the room, right into the skeleton, taking him with you down on the ground. The only thing separating the two of you was your soul. He tried to struggle but you ignored it, just like Charas warning shouts, that he had his attack bones lined up right at your back, just waiting to impale you like some kind of grotesque, deformed shish kebab.  
“Sans!” You breathed at him, smiling. “It’s me, Elaine!” His eye was flickering again, but still raging wild.  
_He’s still stuck! You’re gonna die!_  
The desperate shout behind you didn’t even bother you, you just looked at the skeleton in front of you, still smiling.  
“You’d never hurt me, I know it! I’m here to help…” you whispered and an instinct following, you pressed your lips against his teeth. For a second, he tried to shuffle away, but you didn’t let him. The world has suddenly gone very quiet, but you still focused on this moment, trying to fix Sans, trying to fix everything and not fuck up for once. Your soul was feeling strange, warmer and heavier. Once you withdrew and opened your eyes, you were staring into two white pinpricks illuminating a certain skeletons eyesockets. Poor thing seemed so confused. A blue light irritated you and glancing downwards gave you the answer. You once black soul had taken up a sheer, blue colour, the same one, Sans used for his magic.  
“Elaine…? Why are you? What happened? Is that your…?” Your face contorted into a happy grin, slinging your arms around him, you finally allowed yourself to breath freely again.  
I did it!; you thought, and felt extremely tired all of a sudden. Your lids were so heavy. You pulled back with the greatest effort. Your soul gave another twitch, the blue colour flickering back to black for just a split second. Smiling contend, you put it back where it came from.  
‘Thank you…’ your voice wasn’t even audible, but you still said it. You could feel a nudge on your soul and smiled. Every time you blinked, it was harder and harder to open your eyes again. Sans seemed to feel the same, his sockets were already halfway hooded.  
“How are you doing that…” you mumbled.  
“Doing what?” His words were just as much of a drawn out mewls of complete exhaustion as yours.  
“Close your eyes… You are made out of bone so it shouldn’t be… possible…” The skeleton just chuckled in a low tone, closing his eyes completely. You were leaning on the wall next to him, your head falling down to his shoulder. You didn’t want to sleep… it wasn’t right… But oh so tempting.  
“Magic…” The sound you made was supposed to be a laugh but it came out more of an asthmatic cat, trying not to choke on a hairball. “Elaine…?”  
“Hmmmh?” You weren’t even listening completely to him anymore, his shoulder was just so damn comfortable.  
“I’m… sorry… I didn’t mean to…”  
“Shhht…” One of your fingers, the one you’ve cut before, was pressed against his grin, effectively silencing him. “I know. Don’t blame yourself. I don’t…” You couldn’t hear his reply anymore, the sweet promise of sleep had you lulled in. Your last thought lay in Toriels kitchen, and how furious she must be that you’ve trashed it.

Waking up wasn’t a pleasant experience for Sans. His whole body was aching, even his mind. The only thing, that felt a lot lighter, was his soul. It reminded him of some lightweight, floating cotton candy but he was feeling strange anyways. What exactly happened? He remembered the nightmare, clutching your dead, lifeless body-a memory, that made an unpleasant shiver run down his spine-and then… Chara. Why did he remember that cursed demon hellspwan so vividly? Remembered fighting them, as if it just happened?  
He didn’t remember coming home. He was so sure, that he fell asleep at Toriels place, not his own room.  
A tiny moan slipped him, as he sat up on his mattress. It was so much work. To his own surprise, an exceptionally cool hand was put on his spine, helping him straighten up.  
“Undyne?” he groaned quietly once he was upright and she sat down at the edge of the mattress. “What happened?”  
“You… uuh… had nightmares again.” She whispered and the skeleton broke eyecontact. He couldn’t stand looking at her. “I’ve never seen it that bad before…”  
“Did I hurt someone?” Sans voice was quiet and restrained, his hands clenched.  
“No. Toris kitchen is a bit… charred… and Laney is still…”  
“Elaine?” His head snapped back, staring at Undyne in pure horror. “What’s with her?” She looked away in discomfort. It took her a while to speak up and when she did, her voice was so quiet and muted, he almost missed it.  
“You mistook her for Chara…” If he’d had a stomach, it would have dropped and twisted. “She is… mostly alright though. Already running around again. We brought the two of you back here, to get out of Tori’s hair. Don’t worry, Paps is with her.” The corner of her mouth twitched. It was one of the rare occasions, where the Head of the Royal Guard was more quiet, serious and not even a tiny bit over the top.  
“Why are you watching me? Not Paps?”  
“Let’s be honest, I’m stronger than him. And… I was afraid, that you still might be… dazed. Laney said she fixed it, but just in case…”  
“In case, I’m still dangerous.” There was an unmistakable bitterness in his voice. He couldn’t even look at her.  
“No, I didn’t say that you’re dangerous. I don’t know what exactly happened down there with Frisk and everything but… I’m not stupid, Sans. Sometimes, I think you’re still trapped down there, even if it’s just in your mind. It’s over, you know?”  
“But Chara…”  
“Is dead, Sans!” she interrupted him. “Chara wasn’t here. They’ve been gone for a long, long time. Just ask Tori! She remembers! As I said, you mistook Laney for them. Metta did their hair; they do look quite similar now. No one is blaming you, we were all worried sick. I think Frisk was on the verge of tears even. And you know the kid…”  
“You said, that… Elaine was fixing ….” Confusion still clouded his mind just as much as the guilt.  
“Oh yes! Your magic got a bit out of control and overtook you. You know… Like when I…” She made a grimace and pointed towards her eyepatch. “She… did something…”  
“Did what?” The grimace turned into a smirk and eyebrow-wriggle.  
“She took in the surplus magic with her soul…”  
“That’s impossible, how would she’ve done that?” Undyne snorted and shot him an obvious wink.  
“Dude, I know, she said that she did it to help you-and it obviously worked-but…”  
“But?”  
“But she totally _kissed_ you, man! Fufufufufu!” His cheeks must have been just as blue as Undyne.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OR DID IT?


	13. From bad to worse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just some cutsie little bonding time <3

“SO!” Undyne exclaimed loudly, slamming one hand right next to you at the counter, a big smirk plastered onto her face.

“So?” You answered calmly, continuing to dry off the plate you just cleaned, only looking at her out of the corner of your eye. The white tank top she was wearing showed off her muscular arms, most men would be jealous of. A teasing grin was plastered on her face.

“SO YOU’VE KISSED SANS?!” You shot her a peeved look, putting down the plate and grabbing another one, scrubbing it vigorously.

“I did not kiss him, Undyne.”

“You TOTALLY did, nerd!” Her laugh echoed through the kitchen and you could feel your cheeks burning.

“I did _not_!” you defended yourself just a bit too much, judging by the other ones’ widening grin. “I told you before, and I will tell you again! I drained his magic, to make him snap out of it. And yes, don’t worry, it’s not a permanent thing. I basically lost it immediately again, as if I tried to hold onto smoke!”

“Yeah, but you did it by _kissing_ him!”

“It was not a kiss, Undyne!” Your cheeks were burning red, to your embarrassment. She seemed to notice and started heckling loudly. “OOooh, shut up, you! Here, if you have so much time, help me doing the dishes!” Undyne didn’t even complain but rather took the plate out of your hand to dry it off while you turned your attention back to the coffeemug you just started with. As you shifted your weight, slightly flinching when you felt the sting from your leg.

“That bad?” The sudden drop in her voice and mood made you uncomfortable.

“I had worse, it’s nothing, really!”

“That doesn’t make it any better and you know it…. You know, I can still go to his house to get all of your stuff and maybe give him a piece of my mind. I can be very…”

“No, we’ve talked about that! There isn’t anything really worth back there…”

“But you..”

“No. I’ll come by.” You smiled at her, gently brushing your new fringe out of the way. “But thank you. I’ll be out of your hair soon anyways, so don’t worry!”

“Excuse me, what?” You’ve never seen her more offended in your life. To be honest, you’ve never seen ANYONE look so offended and couldn’t help yourself but chuckle. “No, seriously, don’t laugh at me. What do you mean by that?”

“Well, I can’t leech off the brothers forever” you shrugged. “Besides that, I’m only causing you trouble. And I don’t even wanna know what’s gonna happen, once Hugh figures that he… Doesn’t matter. I’ve been looking for a job or a small apartment I can afford.”

“Are you mental?”

“Excuse me?”

“No, you’ve heard me. Have you gone mad?” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You asked her defensive, slightly glaring. You put down the mug roughly, so it made a loud clank-sound. Undyne just picked it up, drying it off.

“You can’t leave now! You just said, there is still a certain psychopathic WEIRDO out there, that has it in for you! You’d be ripped into tiny little shreds by next Tuesday! And I have plans, I can’t go to your funeral!” It hurt your pride more than it should, that Undyne-buff-as-fuck-strongest-person-you’ll-ever-meet-Undyne-thought that you’d be too weak to survive on your own.

“Well, you wouldn’t be invited anyways!” you grumbled and made a pouty face.

“Yes, I’d be hosting it, Fufufufu!” You couldn’t help but snicker and roll your eyes at her, grabbing the last mug to clean.

“Please just play any stupid song, okay? I don’t know, let the bodies hit the floor or stay’n alive or some crap”

“How about I will survive?”

“Good one!” you admitted, laughing. Undyne joined you, but sooner than later, she stopped; now looking serious again.

“No, but really… I don’t wanna have to bury you or find your corpse in a dumpster somewhere. I’m worried about you… All of us are.” You gently handed her the cup and then turned around to sit on one of the counters, looking at her, since she seemed to have a lot on her mind. She couldn’t even look at you. “You mumble in sour sleep sometimes. Papyrus told me. Or that you don’t sleep at all sometimes. Sans must have noticed even more but… he’s actually a pretty decent and nice guy, despite his bad puns and… yeah… Paps didn’t mean any harm, but he’s never grasped the concept of privacy, I think. I don’t know what you’ve been through but I’ve seen the scars and everything, it must have been some pretty fucked up shit. Heck, you turned up at some _strangers’_ house, beaten ‘nto bloody mush, who does that, not if they are desperate?” You suddenly got the urge to just tell her everything, _everything_ , but repressed that feeling immediately. You couldn’t and you wouldn’t. It’s enough that you spilled the beans to Sans, at least part of it. You couldn’t involve more people in this whole mess. That was exactly the reason, why you needed to leave, as soon as possible. Even the small voice in your head-Chara-agreed to that one, even if they did so reluctantly. Undyne put the now squeaky clean mug with the others and closed the cupboard before turning around to face you, only leaning against the sink. “Or is it because of what happened with Sans?” You blinked in surprise.

“Wh-“

“Hey, I know, shit like that can be scary, but I’m sure he didn’t want to hurt anyone, nevertheless you, of all people!”

“Wait, why m-“

“And I get it, if you don’t want to live with them anymore. It’s pretty hard to wrap your head around magic and all of that stuff”

“Undyne, what are you-“

“And I mean, you handled it pretty well-like really well, especially for such a scrawny, tiny, weak, fragile human!”

“Excuse me, I could beat your ass any day of the we-“

“But you can’t just run off like that! If you really wanna get away, you could still move in with me and Alphy! Or Tori and the kid, if you prefer a quieter life. I’m sure they wouldn’t mind at all. The queen loves ya! I can even ask Alphy, if Metta would be able to take you in, you seemed pretty flustered and you two got along very well.”

“I do not have a crush on Mettaton, if you are implying something along those lines! He is a great actor and I resp-“

“Yeah, I know, because you have a crush on Sans!”

“That is a lie!” You blushed furiously and pointed your finger accusingly.

“It’s not, but shut up! That probably makes it even weirder right now. But running away isn’t the right answer.”

“I do not have a crush on Sans!”

“Oh come on, you kissed him!” Your face was now completely flushed and must resemble a cherry, you were sure of it. Even your voice got all high pitched and embarrassed.

“I wasn’t a kiss for the last time, Undyne! Can I Pleeeeeease-“

“Oh, and what do you call it, when two peoples lips meet?”

“I don’t know, facebattle!?”

“Honestly, that sounds AWESOME! Imma tell Alphy all about that later! Imagine “Let’s facebattle in the rain until the bitter end”, fufufufu! Is there anything cuter? But still, you are staying right here!”

“Undyne, pleeeease!”

“Isn’t that what you should tell Sans?” She gave you an obnoxiously obvious wink and you couldn’t help but let out some kind of weird, frustrated squeal, swaying both your feet and arms a tiny bit, like a child.

“Come on, stoooop!” you whined. Your face felt so hot, you were sure it was about to melt!

“Oooh, but you shouldn’t tell him that!” She teased and for a second you were completely baffled, before you broke out into a laughing fit.

“Oh my god, you are the worst, Undyne! Literally _the_ worst! I hate you, so much!”

“Nooooo, you love me, admit it!”

“Wow, first Mettaton, then Sans and now you, you really must think that I am THAT into monsters” you said, still giggling, before you sighed. “No but seriously, Undyne… I’m not scared of Sans or anything like that. I think I handled the situation pretty well, knocking some-“ _Don’t. Do it!_ “Sans back into him!” _You deserve a special place in the eight circle of hell for that, you know that?_  “but I am not frightened at all. As you said, he is a decent guy, and I trust him. With my life. He’d never hurt me or anything, not on purpose. All of us carry around some weight from the past, no one’s had a perfect life and if you did, you are lying to yourself. He helped me when I was down, he still is… What kind of asshole would I be, if I wouldn’t try to return the favour? I just couldn’t leave him like that, forced to relive the worst time in his life over and over and over, you know. Just… a tiny bit of kindness can do so much.” Undynes’ eyebrows furrowed and cleared your throat before you continued speaking. “So yeah, I’m absolutely not scared of him, despite of what you’re thinking. I like him, he’s one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met. And so are you and Tori and Alphys and Papyrus, the sweetheart. And that’s basically also why I am trying to get my own place set up, so I can’t cause you any more trouble.” The blue Fishlady in front of you smiled gently. You’ve never ever seen her this soft and careful before.

“First of all, you need to get up to full strength again, Laney. And then we can start to think about-“ a small cough interrupted her and she twisted her body around you, to see who was disturbing your girltalk. You turned your torso as well, looking at Sans, who was leaning at the doorframe, his grin slightly strained.

“Sorry if I’m interrupting but… do you think I could have a second with Elaine, Undyne?” Her look went from him to you, then back to him and so on and on, her expression changing from displeased to _very_ pleased and excited. Your face felt like its melting again and you subtly tried to kick her, but she didn’t even notice.

“YES! OF COURSE! I’LL BE…. DOING STUFF! WITH PAPYRUS!” You were pretty sure, that her grin would split her face in half any second now. “HAVE FUN! ALONE! WON’T DISTURB YOU AT ALL; FUFUFU!” You asked yourself it could get any more embarrassing for you when she whispered to you and yes, yes it became way more awkward after that. “Tell me if you facebattle him again!”

“Oh my god, get the fuck out now!” you hissed at her as she almost pranced out of the kitchen, _squealing_ like her OTP just became canon.

“Uuuuh, what was that all about?” he asked, and you shot him an apologetic smile and shrugged. The skeleton simply walked over to you, hands buried deep inside the pocket of his hoodie. “You said some really nice things there, you know?” Your face immediately reddened more and you brushed some hair out of your face.

“How much did you hear?”

“Just the last bit, where you said, that you weren’t scared of me. S pretty brave of you”

“Brave?” You raised one of your eyebrows in disbelief.

“Yeah.” The shiny white pinpricks of light illuminating his eyesockets locked with your eyes. “Because you should be scared.” You couldn’t help yourself but let out a strange sound, half laugh half sigh.

“Don’t try intimidating me, Sans. I meant it. And you would never hurt me. If you really wanted me dead, you wouldn’t have stopped me from jumping in front of a train.”

“Yeah, but..”

“I rest my case.” He simply sighed, looking even grimmer before, nodding at your lag, that was heavily bandaged.

“That’s my fault, isn’t it?”

“It’s only a scratch, really. I had rugburns worse than than this. Papyrus is just very excessive with his bandages.” The lie fell from your lips way too easy. But you just couldn’t bear telling him that you would probably carry the scar around with you for the rest of your life.

“Heh, yeah, he tends to do that…” There was an awkward silence between the two of you. “Hey, I’m really sorry for what happened. I don’t know how it happened. It shouldn’t have. I just…” You were smiling at him, carefully sliding from the counter, cautiously of your skirt. When you put one of your hands, the one you must have cut open somehow, on his cheekbones, he looked surprised.

“I don’t blame you for anything. So don’t blame yourself. At least try to. And if you still do so, see it as something you can do, to make it up to me, will you?”

“How are you still alive? You are way too nice for this world.” Sans seemed so astonished by your words, but you just giggled, covering half of your face.

“A tiny bit of kindness can go a long way. And I already told Undyne, what I think you should have overheard as well. I like you, Sans. And I trust you. And now come, the others are probably really excited to see that you are finally awake again. Paps was worried sick. And I promised Mettaton that we would go and see his new film in the movies together, once you are back up again.” You smiled again and turned, to leave the kitchen. He noticed, that your walk reminded him of a ballerina, especially in the flared out, cute circle skirt and white, ruffled blouse you were wearing. You would have never noticed the blatant staring, if you didn’t have turned around once again, starting him. “Oh yeah, before I forget it. You can buy me popcorn at the movies, if you’re really sorry.” The  tiny wink at the end of your sentence finished him off, making him blush a vibrant blue. The tiny giggle warmed his soul.

“Oh man…” he whispered to himself, after you were gone, unlike the blue colour on his cheekbones.

 

Sans did buy you popcorn. A whole bucket to be exact. And a large coke. Man, he really wanted to make up to you. This didn’t go unnoticed though, as you could basically feel the piercing stare of a certain someone’s yellow eye. You did your best to ignore it, but it was a bit hard. Even after the movie started, you could sense her, glancing at you and Sans, who was sitting at your other side. The movie war really good actually, but you just couldn’t concentrate, not with Undyne on your one side, staring at you like you are a 5th graders sience project and Sans on the other, one arm casually flung around the back of your seat. He did this very often but it felt so much… weirder right now. You were glad, that the room was darkened, so no one could see your blush. A noise next to you indicated that someone was getting up. Interested, you leaned forward, just to see who the poor fool was that needed to pee at one of the really quiet moments. With a smile on your face, you noticed, that it was Frisk, but who could judge them. They emptied their drink before the movie even started and half of their second one already. Surpressing a giggle, you leaned back, your eyes now glued back to the screen. And you sure as hell weren’t taking them off, even though the skeletal hand had moved from the back of the seat to the front, so it was basically lazily draped around your shoulders. A shower went down your spine but you ignored it, just like the burning in your cheeks. Even your soul gave a twitch. God, what was wrong with you, all of a sudden?  
As the movie continued on, you felt the weird twitch, almost like a tight rubber band, you’d snap, a few more times, getting more and more frequent as time went by. You could feel an especially harsh one, right after you got a bit more comfortable with the Arm around your shoulders and actually cuddled a bit into it, Undyne squealing net to you. You highly doubted that it was because of the cutsie romantic scene on the screen, where Mettaton just confessed his undying love. Sans just laughed quietly, in a deep, hoarse voice that made you shiver and suddenly, the feeling on your soul was back, actually hurting you.

“Ow…” You cried out, the people next to you staring at you in surprise.

“You okay there, nerd?” Undyne whispered and you just nodded.

“Yes, I… uuuh… stubbed my toe.” She seemed happy with that answer and turned back to the movie. You didn’t dare looking at the skeleton, instead you just gently rubbed your left collarbone, just above the heart. What was that? Could it be because of Sans? And the weird tension between the two of you in the air? You had to admit, you did feel very different ever since the fight and you were pretty sure, that he did too. What was-

_No, you idiot, that was me! It’s incredibly hard getting to you right now, what’s going on with you?_

Chara?, you though, slightly confused. ‘What do you what?’ you whispered so quietly that it wasn’t even audible.

_Frisk hasn’t returned._

Another shudder went down your spine, this time a cold one. No one else seemed to have noticed, but you were with Chara on this one.

Something was up.

You basically jumped straight up, ignoring the sharp pain in your leg.

“I’ll be right back, I need to pee!” Before any of them could react, you zoomed out of the theatre, right to the toilets. You checked your watch and yeah, almost 20 minutes have passed and no one noticed? Odd. Quietly, you came to halt in front of the toilets, not quite sure which one Frisk would use, before you just entered one of them. “Frisk?” you said; your voice a bit louder, so they could hear you easily. “Are you here, sweetheart?”

No response.

You cursed under your breath, turning back around at the door-just to choke down one of the most bloodcurdling screams. Frisk was behind you, the door just closing behind them and struggling against the harsh grip around their upper arm. They had tears in their eyes and you knew how much it must hurt. It would probably bruise, the fingers leaving a mark on the skin that would be there for a while as some form of cruel reminder. You knew too well. After all, you had the terrifying pleasure of getting to know the grip way too good. You know, since the hand that performed it belonged to your ex-boyfriend.

“ _Hugh_ …” both you and Chara hissed at the same time, a growl erupting from your throat. Oh, where was that handy dandy kitchen knife, when you needed it.

“Hello, sweetie. Did you miss me?” His smile was broad but there was a certain type of insanity in his eyes that frightened you. The fear however did not overshadow the pure anger you felt upon seeing him lay hands on Frisk.

“ _Let go of them_.” You couldn’t tell, which one of you was speaking but you figured that it would be both. Hugh however just laughed.

“Oh my, why so direct. Can’t I get a kiss? After all, you are my girlfriend!”

_“Ex-girlfriend!”_

“Ah, ah, ah! Don’t be so quick to say that! Not when I have your little friend here in my grip. And if I’m not mistaken, isn’t that the weirdo who speaks for the monsters?” He laughed an unpleasant, sickening laugh again. “That is, if they’d speak! Little shit wouldn’t even scream when I hit them.”

 _“You hit Frisk?”_ Your voice was so full of anger and disbelief, something you didn’t know you had in you. You’ve been quite the calm and collected person ever since your parents died and before that too, but in reality, you’ve been a hothead, through and through. Some things you could never get rid of, as it seemed. Just like that vermin of a human.

“Oh, don’t act all high and mighty. Look, I’ll let them go, alright? You just have to come and go home with me, yes? Back to our old, perfect life!”

“What the hell is wrong with you? Do you really thnk, I’d come back with you, after all you’ve done? _You killed my mother!_ ” You had screamed the last thing and could feel your heart beat faster and faster.

“Ah, yes, that was quite stupid of me. But you have to see, you angered me. If you wouldn’t have run off with those freaks, there wouldn’t have been the need to tell the doctors to turn off her machines. So, if you are completely honest, whose fault is it really?”

“Yours!” you exclaimed. Frisk still struggled, but it was in vain.

“Well, I am sad, that you still think that, but I’m sure we can work it out. So let’s go home, Elaine! Now!” His voice turned into something demanding and for a second, you fell back into your old habits of just obeying him before you could shake it off, thinking about what Undyne said to you earlier.

“No! I’m not coming with you! Now let go of Frisk and _leave_!” Hugh only sighed, still smiling that damn, twisted grin.

“I feared that you would say that. But oh well. I am leaving. But! I’ll take the kid with me. I am so determined to not go alone and I sure as fuck wont. So if you are not coming, someone else will… Goodbye then!” He turned away from you, pushing the door open and you felt yourself go numb.

_Don’t_

What choice do I have

_A lot_

He has Frisk

_It’s a trick_

I don’t care. He has Frisk!

_Don’t_

“Wait!” Hughs grin widened again as he looked at you.

“Yes?” he said with an almost sickening sweet voice.

_Laney please, there must be another way…_

“I’ll go with you! Just let the kid go!”

“Can you swear on that?”

“I swear it!” You looked directly into his eyes, feeling like the scum of the earth, saying that.

“You will! Oh, how joyful! I knew, you’d come to your senses!” He stretched the other one of his hands, ready for you to grab. “Just take my hand and I’ll let them go.” You didn’t hesitate for even a split second, before you reluctantly took the big, sweaty paw.

_No!_

As soon as your skin touched his, he dropped Frisks arm and pulled you to him.  The child looked up to you, mouthing the same word as Chara, before they dashed out of the bathroom. Your now boyfriend again-even though you wanted to call it more of a prison than a relationship-started to drag you with him, now both of his hands on your body. You felt disgusting.

“Oh, babe, we have so much to catch up on. You have no idea, what you did to me!” You were sure that you were about to find out. A single tear escaped your eye, only now you could feel the sheer panic and fear coming back to you.

At least Frisk is safe, you thought, before accepting your fate. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mmmh yeah, and you guys thought that I was done


	14. Instincts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stuff happens and Undyne totally doesn't care about Elaine at all and totally didn't spent the night probably crying.

The punch didn’t come surprisingly, but it still took away your breath. The muscles in your stomach were contorting in pure agony where the closed fist hat hit you and you were pretty sure, that you were tasting blood. This was the second time someone attacked you in 48 hours, so you were already sore as hell, your body still hurting all over. You didn’t get far from the cinema, to your astonishment. Usually, Hugh would keep up the mask until you were home but it seemed like there was too much pent up aggression inside of him that was now focused on his outlet: you.

You tried very hard, not to make a sound or look as miserable, as you felt, but it was basically impossible.

_Run!_

‘I can’t…’ you mumbled and Chara let out a frustrated wail, only noticeable to you, since you were the one with them stuck to your soul. But it was a complicated mess, just like everything else. You couldn’t run, couldn’t go back to your friends. He would hurt them just like he hurt Frisk and like he is hurting you now. You had nowhere to hide, nowhere to go. Curly was out of question as well and your last remaining relatives didn’t even care for you, they probably thought you dead, ust like the rest of your family.

_Don’t be stupid, just do something. Fight!_

‘What does it matter now?’

_You managed to stick up to the fucking scariest bastard in the underground-twice now!-don’t let such a twat get to you! Fight!_

You couldn’t even process the words, before another punch hit you, this time on your shoulder. You stumbled backwards, your bad leg giving away. You could feel the thin fabric of your leggings tearing as you scraped your knee on the rough asphalt. Ouch, that would be a scar later on. One more to add to the list, you figured. Your soul gave another twitch, sending sharp pain through your body and mind, making you gasp.

“Don’t ignore me, when I am talking to you, you ignorant bitch!” Hugh growled and a primal fear started spreading inside of you. Terrified, you looked up to him, whimpering at the sight. He seemed so much taller, especially from your perspective. His broad torso blocked most of the light that shun from the streetlamps on the deserted road into the dirty alleyway, just a few blocks away from the cinema.

“I-I didn’t ignore you! I swear!” You were disgusted by your own voice, how pathetic and pleading it sounded. You wanted to be strong, to fight back and be tough. Be the hothead you’ve always been and not hide behind this wall of fear and shame, wanted to just give up on being careful and tip toe around, carefully choosing each and every word, that would be leaving your mouth. But instead you were cowering again, terrified and whimpering.

‘It’s to protect them…’ you thought but the thought of the friends, you’ve made lately alone made your tears swell up again.

“Bullshit! Hangin’ around with those freaks made you a bit feisty, ey? Trying to be defiant, aren’t we?” You started to shake your head in terror, slowly raising your hands in a defending manner.

“No, I’m not!”

“I bet they were nice to you. Made the little slut you are feel reeeeal good?” The colour drained from your face, tears filling your eyes more and more, about to spill over. What had started out as fear had now turned into sheer terror and panic.

“Nonono, really, please no!” Your hands were shaking so much and you could feel Chara fighting inside of you, screaming things, you couldn’t hear because you were in such a state of dismay. Hugh only hit you in the face with the open hand. Your head jerked around, now there was definitely some blood in your mouth, you could taste the disgustingly familiar coppery aroma.

“I don’t believe you! You know what, maybe I should just ask my dad to go over and check some of them out, hmmh? The two skeleton freaks maybe? I just have to make one call and I’d get rid of them for good. Let’s see, the tall one, looks real sinister. I’m sure he could kill a child in no time. Vicious little monsters, those skeletons. And we can’t have them run around, endanger our young and fragile youth.”

“Don’t you dare to lay even a single finger on Papyrus!” you hissed. You could handle the abuse but you just can’t stand and watch as he threatened to hurt the most innocent being the earth has ever been blessed with.

“I knew you’d say that, babe. You’ve always had a soft spot for the poor and disfigured. And I know that I can’t just lock them up, you’d start to act up on me. Simply punishing doesn’t seem to work on you little bitch” he empathised the word with another slap. “anymore. So I’ve got to do something more… drastic…”

“I won’t act up. Just leave them alone…” You voice was shaking due to the mixture of terror and anger.

“I know you won’t.” His smile was so sickening that you had to avert your eyes. “But just to make sure, let’s make it clear, _who_ is in control here.” You were still staring at the ground, trying to stay calm, as you heard the sound of a zipper being opened. Your head whipped back up, staring at this disgusting abomination of a human, as he slit down the fly of his pants, intentions very clear. You tried to cry out, but the only thing that left your mouth was a choking sound. You tried to shuffle back in utter horror, until the row of trashcans blocked you. Tears were now spilling over uncontrollably, just like your sobs.

“Nononono, please don’t, please, everything ut this, please, no…” you pleaded, but it was of no use. You were sure that someone must have heard you.

But nobody came.

Hughs huge hand came towards you, trying to grab you. What you didn’t prepare for, was that his grip would be blocked by… your own arm.

 _I’m_ not _gonna let him do this to you. I did not get you out of this place, just to see you imprisoned again! You might have given up, but I_ didn’t _and I am determined to fight!_

“What are you doing, you utter dimwit?” he shouted at you but you were only shaking your head vigorously.

“I am not. It’s not me, I swear!”

“Of course it’s you, who else would it be?” You grabbed your own arm, you had no control over and tried to pull it off him.

“Chara! Stop that!” you shouted out lout. _“No! If you’re unwilling to do something, then I have to! We are the one in control here!”_ It was so weird, talking to yourself, but seeing that you were not only fighting off a living nightmare but also for control, you just had to deal with it.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Hugh shouted, pulling his arm away, as if he’s gotten burned by your very touch.

 _“I’m defending her from you, can’t you see?”_ You slapped your own head. “Shut up!”

“You’re a freak, just like them!” He seemed disgusted by you, clenching your fists.

“ _Good! I’d rather have her_ \- Be quiet!” Oh god, everything was so confusing all of a sudden. Your soul gave another twitch, a different kind this time, but you were to preoccupied to even notice.

“Ugh, I can’t believe this. If I didn’t need you so badly, I’d just fucking kill you already.”

“ _Wait_ what?” both of you talked at the same time, which was just as uncomfortable as it sounds. No one should ever try speaking with two voices at the same time but only one set of vocal cords.

“Shut up you lunatic slut!” He shouted at you, raising his arm again. You already flinched precautiously, the urge to do so greater that Chara’s to fight back. The punch you anticipated never came though. Peeking through your hands pressed against your face you looked up back at him. When you saw the white skeletal fingers warped around Hughs wrist, you couldn’t help yourself but let out a scream and trying to scoot back again, knocking over the trashcans in the process.

“ _Sans_!” He didn’t react to the two of you whispering his name, his one glowing eye was glued to your attacker.

“Get away from me, you abomination!” Everyone with a normal functioning brain and common sense would have ran already, seeing the skeletons face. You’ve never seen him so angry, not even when he was fighting you. Hugh tried to push him or pull back his arm but a familiar blue tinge, that made you shiver hindered him, no matter how hard he tried. So the two of them just stared each other down, Sans being the clear winner here.   
You could hear more voices coming through the allyway, but you didn’t care. Even when a familiar cool hand was wrapped around your shoulder, you still couldn’t tear away your gaze from Sans.

“You touch her again and I will break your wrist. And then I’ll proceed to break every single bone in your body, until you’ve got the message, okay pal? And now fuck off, or you’re gonna have a bad time!” The low growl paired with the meaning behind these words made your whole body tingle. Only now, the blue light disappeared and not even an idiot like Hugh would be insane enough to ignore a warning like that. He shot you one last disgusted glare before he spat in your direction.

“This isn’t over, and you know it, bitch!” Without another word, he stormed off into the night, kicking a trashbin in the process.

“Oh, it actually is!” Mettatons voice came from the other side of the alley, almost purring. He taped his cassis, lips curled and hips swaying. “How good that I filmed that last bit when we came, right? I am sure the police will be very interested in a death threat.” You still couldn’t move, felt numb and empty all of a sudden. You realised, that you were back in control, no longer fighting against Chara, who was just apparent by the warm feeling in your chest, as if they’d hug you. Mettaton said more, but you couldn’t hear them anymore, only white noise around you. It took you a while, before you noticed that someone was shaking you vigorously. Undyne was sitting right in front of you, her pretty face contorted into a grimace of worry and terror. A turquoise spear made of magic lay forgotten next to her. You still couldn’t understand what she was saying, only saw her lips moving. Your empty eyes darted around, there were only three monsters here, Mettaton, Undyne and Sans. Where were the others? Were they safe? Did something happen? Oh, this was all your fault, you should just run. Maybe, if you acted quickly, they wouldn’t have to suffer the consequences. Or if you could just disappear forever, then-

Surprisingly warm boney hands were put on both of your cheeks, making you look up with gentle force, so you could stare into the now white lights illuminating Sans’ eyesockets.

“Who am I talking to?” he whispered in a deep voice and you blinked in surprise.

“Elaine Winters.”

“Good. Talk to me.” He demanded in a stern voice. You couldn’t understand why but obliged nevertheless.

“I am twenty-three years old. I was in my last semester of my doctors degree in quantum physics. I…. _Did you threaten to crush his bones?_ ” you suddenly hissed at him in disbelief. HEonly leaned back and let out a real laugh.

“Don’t scare me like that, I thought you were in shock. Undyne tried to talk to you for several minutes and you didn’t react.” Guilt pierced through you as you looked at her, still dishevelled but now a lot less anxious. Sans put an arm around your shoulder. “Come on, get up. We have to get you home.”

“Sans, you need to go with Metta. You are the one on they tape, they…”

“No chance I’m gonna leave her alone like that, Undyne!” he snapped at her but she just sighed, scooping you up as if you were a feather.

“You are not, I’m gonna stay with her.” He looked as if he wanted to protest but you didn’t want them to fight now.

“Please. Don’t fight. She’s right. You have things to do. I just wanna sleep, nothings gonna happen! Undyne is with me. No one would be stupid enough to cross her path.”

“But…”

“I want to go home, Sans!”

“Fine!” he snapped, slightly glaring. “I’m gonna take you there.”

“But how…” Before you could even finish your sentence, your stomach dropped and your vision vent dark. It felt as if you were just dropped from a 10 story building and caught mid-air. Once your sight was back, you found yourself back in Sans living room. “Shortcut…” you murmured and he gave you a short nod before looking back at the blue fish, still holding you.

“I will be back as fast as I can. Take care of her!” Neither of you answered and the next time you blinked, he was gone again. You could have been mistaken, but you were so sure, that he gave you one last look, filled with primal fear and guilt.

“Undyne, can I… sofa…?” you weren’t even able to form coherent phrases anymore.

“Sure.” You closed your eyes and when you opened them again, you were on the couch, covered in a blanket and Undyne watching over you anxiously.

“Did I doze off?”

“Yeah, just a few minutes though.” Her voice was quiet and hoarse, as if she had to hold back. Neither of you spoke for a few minutes, before she leaned back. “Why didn’t you call for us? Or ask for help when you noticed that something was up right away?”

“I… I don’t know?” You admitted. “I just.. I want to say that I wanted to brave and not cause you trouble or ruin your fun night for nothing or even that I knew that it would just endanger you but…” you furrowed your brows, carefully sitting up and hugging your knees. “The truth is that I am used to not ask for help. It’s been like that in forever. And I couldn’t bring myself to do it again. I’ve always managed to handle everything, I thought that maybe I still could. I know, it’s stupid…”

“Didn’ I tell you, that I don’t want to find your dead corpse in a dumpster? Sans been going crazy, once the kid came back to get us for help. I’ve never seen him so upset and angry before…”

“Yeah… But oh my god, I was so relieved and happy to see the three of you pop up there, you wouldn’t believe it…”

“So was I, to be honest…”

“Where are Paps and the others?” You asked quietly after some time had passed.

“He is with Tori and Alphy… Ya know, to look after the kid.”

“Good, good… I’m glad they are save…” You couldn’t help but let out a loud sob. “Oh god, I was so scared.” She quickly came over and hugged you as tight as possible.

“I know, but it’s alright.”

 

When Sans came back two hours later, you were already fast asleep on the couch, Undyne sitting on the chair and watching you. She didn’t greet him, just looking at his skull, waiting for an update. He simply shook his head, nodding into your direction.

“Tomorrow, okay?” She only blinked at him in understandment and he sat down on the floor in front of you. Your face seemed so relaxed and peaceful, as if nothing’s ever happened. His soul gave a little  nudge at the sight, he couldn’t understand. He felt it before this night, when he noticed that you were gone way too long and another time, as if you were crying out for him. The last time, he felt it, when he made a shortcut directly to you. He didn’t know how he did it, he only followed his instincts but something led him there. Frustrated, he started shaking his head. This wasn’t the time to think about rubbish soul stuff like that. Frustrated with himself, he looked back at Undyne. “You don’t look too fresh, if ya want, you can crash in Paps bed for the night…” She simply nodded and walked off to the bedroom on the left. She seemed so muted down after recent events, it really weirder him out. You made a tiny noise when you stirred but didn’t wake up. You looked so tiny on the couch and hell, it must be so uncomfy for you. Without even thinking about it, he simply scooted you up into his arms, blushing furiously, when you snuggled closer to him. The walk over to his own bedroom wasn’t very long so he didn’t have to open another shortcut and risk having you wake up on him. For once, his room wasn’t as dirty as usually and Papyrus just made him change the sheets which he was thankful for right now as he placed you onto the soft mattress. It didn’t even take you a second before you nuzzled into the fluffy blanket.   
Hell, you looked so adorable in your sleep; he couldn’t help it but smile. His eyes fell upon your shoulder, where bruises shaped in the form of a hand already started to show up and anger was bubbling up inside of him.

How dare that filthy…

You turned around again, now facing him and your hair fell from your shoulder, leaving your neck in the open for him to stare at.

Something changed.

His mind got dazed and for just a second, he asked himself, if you’d like it if he bit you there. Snapping back into reality, he was overcome by a feeling of disgust. What the hell was he thinking there? You were-

Moaning his name in your sleep actually.

His soul made another weird movement and he could feel the blue blush creep back on his cheeks. Did you really just? There-you did it again! The blue colour on his face grew brighter and his eyes wandered back to your neck and so did his mind. He couldn’t stop but stepped closer. His hand was shaking, when he brushed a strand of hair out of your face, accidentally touching your neck. Both of you shivered and he jerked back. What the hell was going on?

“Sans…?” you whispered into the dark, obviously being awakened by the noise he just made. “What’s going on? Where am I?”

“My room. Thought you wanted to sleep in a bed for a change!” His voice was unusually strained but you didn’t notice, just like the sweat on his forehead.

“Am I taking up your bed? Oh golly, I am so sorry!” He could see very well how you scooted over, still sleepily rubbing your eyes and oh boy, this was probably the cutest thing he’d ever seen in his life. “We can share the bed…”

“NO!” _Yes!_ “I uh… Still need to pick up Papyrus!” You made a suspicious glance towards the alarmclock on the cardboard box next to the bed.

“At 2am?”

“Yes!” You simply nodded, still half asleep and dropped back on the bed.

“Okay… Night Sansy~” you drawled sleepily and immediately fell back asleep. His breathing was heavy and irregular, his soul pushing forward, as if it was drawn closer to you. You were now sleeping on your back, the blanket around your waist, arms above your head. The picture would be edged into his brain forever, if he had one. Unwillingly, the row of teeth plastered into a permanent grin slit along the fine, barely visible line, baring his fangs, as he licked across them with his blue tongue. He stopped in the middle of the activity, when he noticed what was happening and jumped back, holding back a loud swear. Only one thought occupied his mind now.

‘ _I have to get away from her…_ ’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LET THE SHIPPING BEGIN! SUFFER!


	15. Sorrowful, Regretful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm just gonna drop this off. Not gonna say anything. 
> 
>  
> 
> Fear me!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not intent for this to be this long, but I just had too much fun with this chapter and went to town, I am so sorry. 
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> (So not sorry)

The next days were… weird. For a couple of reasons. First of all, you never found out what exactly Sans and Mettaton did with that tape of theirs and no matter how much you asked, no one would tell you. Whatever it was, however, it deemed itself effective, as Hugh didn’t try anything at all thus far. You were just waiting for the big blow, which made you anxious.  
The others seemed to have noticed, everyone treated you like you were made out of glass and quite frankly, it frustrated you so much more than it should. You hated being handled like that, you weren’t a small child, you could handle yourself. Surprisingly, you got over the whole ordeal pretty fast, got up again and busied yourself with the housework, even though Papyrus tried to stop you as much as he could but it just wouldn’t work that well. God, you hated not having something to do, you were itching to do… something.  
But maybe, it wasn’t your intention alone. A lot of things have changed between you and Chara over the past few days. Well, not exactly. It started when you met your new monsterfriends, Chara becoming more active again up to a point where the two of you could actually somewhat communicate, not just the stray comment or push you’ve felt before. You caught yourself more often than not, just staring at your hand, flexing the fingers and observing every muscle moving, bending and working under the pale skin. It was the second time now that they controlled part of your body to save you when you couldn’t do it yourself. It was such a big relief to you, not being alone this time. Maybe that’s what kept you going right now.  
Who wasn’t anywhere near though, was Sans, and honestly, that’s what been bothering you the most. Every time you entered a room, it seemed like he basically teleported away immediately. And shit, that actually hurt. Quite literally. Every time it happened, your soul gave a painful, sharp twitch, as if someone just had stabbed you. You already had a red spot right under your collarbone because you kept rubbing it in order to sooth your pain. Even Papyrus was worried by his brothers’ strange behaviour, a complete 180° turn from his usual one. You couldn’t understand, after everything that has happened. You could already feel the frustration pent up inside of you. When you were younger and still in school, you always busied yourself with so much work, that you didn’t even have a second to spare of the frustration, sooner or later dissolving into nothingness. After the accident, you were busy surviving and simply didn’t have the time to bother yourself with stuff like that. But right now, the absolute boredom paired with the whole Sans-ordeal gave your mood a severe blow. Hell, Papyrus even went to go to the groceries without you, probably to keep you save or anything. So you sat on the couch and played your stupid rhythm game, by now you were pretty sure, that you were unbeatable at it, simply because you gathered up a lot of experience lately. At this point of time, you could even beat the hardest levels in no time, wouldn’t even break a sweat.  
You heard the front door open but didn’t even bother to get up, simply shouted “I’m in the living room” to warn whoever was coming. Just a few moments later, you felt the back of the couch give in a bit due to the weight that was applied when Undyne leaned on it, watching over your shoulder. She came by pretty much every day now, pretending to hang out with Paps or for training sessions or cooking but you were pretty sure, that she did it, to check in with you and see to it, that you were still very much alive and okay.

“Isn’t that the level you’ve had a bit of trouble with?” she asked and broke your concentration.

“Yes, and I just died, only a few seconds away from the finish line, thanks very much!” you muttered and threw the phone into the corner of the sofa. “Hello to you too, Undyne!” She simply laughed and jumped over the backwards rest of the sofa, nestling into the pillows comfortably and stretching.

“I did say Hi but you didn’t hear me, nerd”

“Yeah, whatever… So, what’s on the menu today, I’m practically starving!”

“No cooking today, sorry…” And you let out a dramatic sigh, draping your torso dramatically over her lap.

“Oh no, the humanity! Whatever shall I do now? How should I come by without putting out 5 fires today? And I sooo~ depend on glitter on my food by now, will I survive this tragic blow?” you whined in a mockingly tragic voice. She just snorted loudly, holding back a laughing fit.

“You know, you can be just as dramatic as Metta…” Her voice was cracking up at the end and you grinned, still lying across her lap.

“No, then I would start crying and cherry blossoms would rain from the ceiling!” you insisted and she simply rolled her eyes.

“You are such a drama queen, Laney…”

“No, I’m _bored_!” It just blurted out of you, without thinking, but now that you’ve started, you couldn’t stop. “Papyrus and Sans won’t let me do anything! Even the laundry. Paps made him clean his room yesterday! Did you know that there is a carpet? _I didn’t_! And I’ve been living here for quite some time! There isn’t much to do here either. Sans is still avoiding me for whatever fucking reason he has and I can’t just use Paps to go and do stuff, he has so much on his mind already and… arrgh, I’m burning to just do something.” Undyne let you ramble on with your rant for a while until you ran out of things to say, simply petting your hair like some sort of gigantic cat.

“Any idea why the bonehead is such a bummer right now?”

“ _No_!” You sat up halfway, so engulfed in your bitching, before you settled down. The head scratches were surprisingly good. “I didn’t say stop..” You bashed your lashes and she continued with the soft petting. “But no, I have no fucking idea. One day he is like super protective and wants to be nice and everything- _he even put his arm around my shoulders at the cinema_ -“ you hissed the last part, looking up to her with big, round eyes. “and the next day he can’t even be in the same room with me for more than a minute? I mean? What the fuck?”

“That’s weird? Because I’m pretty sure he had a crush on you to! So why would he now treat you like you have some contagious sickness?”

“I don’t know! That’s exactly the problem!” You went back over her last words and started to blush furiously. “You really thought that he liked me…. Like… _Like_ like?” The blue fish blinked at you, taking in your quiet yet enticed tone and then threw her head back as she broke out in a roar of laughter.

“Why are you so interested all of a sudden?”

“I am not! I was just asking! For… a friend!” Your blush spread all over your face now, not just the cheeks.

“A friend?” Undyne raised the eyebrow over her bling eye and bit her lip.

“Y e s!”

“Who!” The two of you started each other down for several moments because you blurted out the truth.

“Okay, I’m the friend! I just wanna know! You can’ go back now, you already started, I wanna know!”

“I knew it, you have a crush, HAH!”

“I do not! Im just curious!” Defending yourself seemed kinda useless right now, but you still tried! You would not admit to it, ever!

“How good he kisses?”

“NO!”

“Yeah, you already know that, don’t you?” The wink she gave you made your face burn and you slapped her stomach friendly. Not that she would have noticed, Undyne had abs of steel.

“Undyne, stop that, we didn’t kiss!” you insisted but she just hackled again. “And I do not have a crush! God, why am I telling you things?”

“Because we are besties, admit it! And you love it!”

“Only if you admit, that you love me, you giant fucking Dork!”

“Never!” She stuck out her tongue and you did the same. “Say, if you don’t have a crush on Sans, then why do you keep saying his name in your sleep?” For a moment, you were at a loss of words, your mouth agape.

“How do you… Papyrus?”

“Papyrus.” She confirmed and you glared at her. Undyne seemed totally indifferent to that and simply wriggled her eyebrows at you.

“Okay, yes, he pops up in my dreams sometimes!” you admitted hesitantly.

“Oooooh~ what kind of dreams? Just casual facebattling or the rather saucy-“

“I’m gonna stop you there! And no, nothing like that. He’s just… there…. It’s totally boring and casual. But every time when I wake up, my soul hurts again…”

“Your soul hurts?”

“Uh yeah, why?”

“Does that… happen often?” Why did she sound so anxious all of a sudden?

“Yeah, every time he ditches on me and… why?” You narrowed your eyes, unwilling to say another word.

“A painful soul isn’t good. Especially with one like yours?”

“Mine? ‘Fuck is wrong with my soul?”

“Yeah, Sans explained that it’s a pretty fragile one, he couldn’t even draw it out before. And if Sans can’t do that, that’s a huge deal. He’s like the most talented monster when it comes to souls. Just has a hand for them…”

_Does she know that that’s only because of…_

Obviously not.

“Maybe you should go and ask Alphy or Toriel to look at it, there’s no messing around with souls. God, imagine that.”

“Imagine what?”

“If someone tempered with human souls. That shit can be so dangerous. Accidental soul bonding or corruption or even breaking it.”

_Uh..._

“Yeah, soul business should stick with monsters. You can destroy so much with that.”

_UH…_

“I will ask them sometime around, yes?” you said hastily, not wanting to linger on the subject for another second. Chara seemed to agree with you as well, clearly just as uncomfortable. “But say, if you and Paps aren’t cooking today, what’s on the plan?”

“Super special secret Royal Guard training, Fufufu!”

“Maaaaaaan, that sounds so cool! I’d love to join you guys…” You flopped back to her lap, groaning in agony.

“I don’t think, that that’s a good-“

“I wanna go! I am bored outta my mind and wanna do stuff and now I’m stuck here! Why do you get to do all of the fun stuff and I’m grounded? I did all of my chores and homework!” You put on a pretty impressive pout, crossing your arms in front of your chest. “This sucks!” Undynes face softened indefinitely and she patted your cheek in a friendly manner.

“Come on, it’s not that bad. And I’m sure that everything’s gonna be just fine, once the dust has settled… A lot of things have happened lately, not everyone can be back up their feet like that. I don’t know how you are doing it, but us normal people will calm down soon enough.”

“Guess I just have the energy of two in that case…” you grumbled.

_Laney!_

What? It’s not like they gonna get it? 

_Still! No need to risk upsetting them. Do you really want to lose our only allies?_

“Okay, that might very well be true. But-“

“If you are gonna tell me that everything will be back to normal soon or that it’s fine, I swear to go Undyne, I will throw you out of the window.”

“Someone’s in a bad mood today” Never in your life did you sit up faster, glaring at Sans who was just casually walking by.

“Well, since everyone’s gonna treat me like a child anyways, why not throw a temper tantrum, what’cha gonna do? Ground me some more?” Your eyes were practically shooting knifes at him. Usually, you wouldn’t just blow up like that but you had it up to here with this nonsense.  The so much tall woman next to you put one hand on your arm, either to calm you down or hold you back. “But maybe Undyne will finally take me to the park, seeing that we already have you in here to play mood swings for me.”

“ Ey, don’t drag me into this, I’m just an innocent bystander!”

“Oh, since when are you innocent?” She opened her mouth, thought for a few seconds and then closed it again.

“Okay, you got a point there!”

“Well, you two are having fun, as it seems. Maybe I’ll _swing_ by for dinner later, heh…” Was he seriously gonna disappear again? Just like that? Undyne and you shared a short look, just for a second, but it was quick enough for you to basically fit a whole conversation into it. Guess that’s girlpower for you there.

-Hoe don’t do it

-IMMA DO IT

-DON’T DO IT

-IMMA DO IT!

-Okay, go for it! But I demand updates!

“Oh no, you won’t…” you hissed and basically jumped over the back of the couch, putting your hand around Sans arm, just when he was teleporting out of the room. And since you were attached to him, he took you right with him, if he wanted or not. You should have been used to Sans so called shortcuts, but instead you felt your stomach churn and turn upside down. Just as fast as his room popped up in front of you, everything went black for a second and your knees buckled under you. One hand pressed against your mouth to stop you from gaging while you were crouching. Sans seemed to have moved back against the wall, his face contorted in panic.

“Elaine, what-“

“Shut up for a second or I will literally puke on your floor and then on you and then on everything you love!” you snapped at him before taking a few deep breaths, slowly getting better before you stood up again, still glaring. “Okay, now you can scream at me all you want.”

“Are you sure, you’re alright?” He still seemed vary, concerned and that made you even angrier.

“Yes, of course!”

“Then what the hell is wrong with you? You can’t just pull of a stunt like that, do you know how dangerous that is? You could have gotten lost in the void and trust me, that’s not a fun place!”

_As if he needs to tell us. Bit late for that…_

Not now.

“Well, I could ask you the same thing, after all, I am not the one that keeps disappearing all the time I see your stupid face! Your room is literally 5 feet away and yet you still feel that you need to teleport away as if every second is one too much!” He seemed to be sweating and was still standing by the wall, his voice was strained and slightly angry now.

“You shouldn’t care about that anyways.”

“And why not? If I shouldn’t care then why are you so intend to keep me in here? What’s hindering me to just get the hell out of here?”

“I’m just trying to keep you save, don’t you understand?” he roared back at you. You were gradually moving closer at each other. You could feel your face burning from the arguing, already flushed red and so was his, just a vibrant shade of blue instead of red.

“Oh, I can see that! First you’re all like “Touch her and I will break every single bone in your body, yarharhar, I’m such a bad boy, fear me!” and then you just teleport the fuck outta here? What kind of stupid logic is that? There is nothing out there that can hurt me anymore, at least for a while, so please tell me, _what the fuck you are afraid of that can rip me into little shreds_!”

“ _I am!_ ” You involuntarily flinched, taken aback by his words. “I am afraid of myself and what I could do to you! I almost killed you, just the day before the whole thing at the cinema happened and…and…and…”

“And what?”

“It could happen anytime again. I could snap any second and just… I have nightmares. I’ve had them for a while but it’s so much worse since you are in them. Can you imagine how awful it is, to see you dying all over again, because of me?”

“Sans…”

“One day something will happen but this time there won’t be any resets! I promised to keep you safe but how can I do that _when I am the thing that endangers you_?”

“Sans, you are not going to hurt me!”

“You can’t say that!” he snarled at you and you squinted at him.

“Yes I can!” You had raised your voice again and if you would have just taken a moment, you would have realised, how close the two of you were already. “So you think you can kill me? Yeah? So What? So could another human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. _You aren’t special, Sans_!”

“Wait, I’m pretty sure you took that one from the internet…”

“And even if I did, I am right!” You took his hand and put it against your throat. “Feel that? That’s my pulse _! I am alive_. And I am pretty sure that I should be dead four times already and only one of them is even slightly related to you, so stop acting like you are the worst thing that has happened since the second season of Sword Art Online.” Your soul gave a noticeable twitch to his touch, however not painful but rather the opposite.

“I could kill you.” He was staring at your neck, his boney fingers still pressed against your skull.

“You are not going to.”

“How can you say that?”

“Because I will beat your arse if you try to.”

“You can’t”

_No, but I can._

Shuddup

“I did before. I’m good at knocking some _Sans_ into you.”

_YOU RECYCLED THAT! YOU CANT DO THAT!_

“Heh, that was a good one, kid…”

See? He liked it.

_He likes puns. That’s it!_

“I don’t get why you aren’t running…” A shudder went down your spine as the tip of his index finger slowly scraped along the drape of your neck.

“I am not scared of you, Sans.” Your voices had transformed from angry shouting to an intense whisper and both of you were still flushed.

“You should be…”

“There are a lot of things I should and shouldn’t do.” A few moments passed, you were still staring at each other, so many things unsaid, Anger still bubbling inside you. You didn’t know which one of you started it, it could have been both but the next second, your lips were pressed against his teeth.  
One of Sans hands was tangled in your hair, the other one around your waist, puling you closer to him. Your hands were draped around his vertebrae, clinging to the fur of his hoodie in inexplicable desperation. The kiss only got more intense by the second. Suddenly, he turned the both of you around, pressing you against the wall so you let out a surprised yelp. As your mouth opened, you could feel something wet on your lip. No, that was impossible… Sans was a skeleton, how could he-

He has a tonge.

No doubt about it. And oh boy, what a tongue that was. It was warm and just a slightly bit slimy but it had the sweetest taste you’ve ever had the pleasure to introduce to your taste buds. It reminded you of the blue laffy taffy, your favourite kind, the one that would stain your tongue an electric blue colour. But there was something else mixed with it. Was it toffee? No, not quite. It was so frustrating, having the best flavour right in front of you but being unable to just describe it.  
Sans was clearly the one in control right now but you enjoyed it so much, everything felt so right this moment. Your heart was pounding so hard, you were sure it was about to explode from your chest. Eventually, you had to part, after all, one of you still had lungs that required air from time to time. You were still pressed against the wall, your chest heaving and the sight of the skeleton was not helpful at all. You never knew, that the set of teeth could actually part but it obviously did now, a glowing blue tongue shining brightly between a pair of sharp fangs. The sight should have frightened you but surprisingly… It did the exact opposite to you.

Oh man, that was so hot.

The thought alone made you blush even more but you couldn’t care less. Sans hands wandered from your waist down to your thighs, hoisting you up in the air, your back pressed against the wall, effectively making you repress a moan. Instead, all that left your mouth was a pleased sigh.  
Sans mouth was pressed against the very neck he had been staring at so intensely before; the scraping of his fangs against your thin and sensitive skin sending dozens of shivers through your veins, his tongue only intensifying the sensation.

“You are playing a dangerous game here. Are you sure you are not scared?” The low growl vibrated against the nape of your neck, teasing you oh so sweetly. The corners of your mouth twitched when Sans shivered to touch of your fingers against his vertebrae.

“Do I look afraid to you, Sans?” You whispered breathless, he was still sucking on your neck. Your lips were so sensitive when you bit them.

“Well, maybe it’s time to put some Sans into you, if you like playing with fire, doll…” You snorted at the pun and pressed two big, open mouthed kissed on his now completely blue cheekbones.

“I am not running away”

“Can’t see how you would.” His mouth crashed into you again and you closed your eyes in pleasure, clinging on for dear life. Your soul felt so hot, it was a strange feeling but also one you never wanted to miss again. You could hear Sans growl your name in a low voice and this time, you couldn’t hold back the tiny moan.

“BROTHER, TINY HUMAN! THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS RETURNED FROM THE GROCERY STORE! OH HELLO; UNDYNE! HAVE YOU SEEN SANS AND THE HUMAN?” Papyrus loude and happy voice snapped the both of you out of your haze so quickly, that Sans actually dropped you when he moved back in surprise.

“Oh, shit, are you hurt?” he immediately asked, reaching out to help you up.

“Real smooth, numbskull…” you grumbled and your eyes met. You stared into the white lights illuminating the eye sockets and he into your burgundy colours. Only now it dawned on you what just had happened and your entire face turned crimson red. Sans was just as flushed and you jumped away from each other. “What the fuck just happened?”

“I don’t know!”

“You kissed me!”

“You kissed back!”

“Fuck yeah I did!” You buried your face in your hands. “Fuck, I did! Ooooh, I’m never gonna hear the end of that!”

“Elaine, your ne-“

“HERE YOU ARE!” Papyrus burst through the door and your heart probably stopped. Oh god, you were so embarrassed right now. “I SEE THAT YOU WERE TALKING AGAIN! I AM HAPPY TO SEE THAT! I DON’T LIKE FIGHTING!” He beamed down at you, not noticing the obvious tension in the room. “UNDYNE AND ME ARE GOING TO TRAIN NOW, I AM SO EXCITED!” You could see said head of the royal guard peak into the room behind the towering skeleton and your mind just went into autodrive. Sans seemed a bit overwhelmed with the situation, he just stood there, sockets empty and stiff as a board.  
You jumped up and squeezed past Papyrus, grabbing Undynes elbow, dragging her towards the door.

“I am so sorry Papyrus, but I uuuuh… I need Undyne for a super special secret mission! I am sorry that I am kidnaping her in the middle of your training but… this is super important!”

“What?” she hissed at you but you nudged her side and she cleared her throat. “Oh, yes. YES! SUPER IMPORTANT! CAN’T TELL YOU THOUGH! VERY SECRET!”

“Yes indeed, haha!”

“We are gonna make up for the missed lesion though, don’t think you’re gonna get away easily!”

“OF COURSE NOT! STAY SAFE!”

“Yeah, we will. See you later!” Without another word, you dragged her out of the door, already running down the stairs.

“Hey, wait up, tiny!” She called after you, but you were to preoccupied with screaming internally to actually halt. “Hey, it’s freezing! Here, take my jacket!” She said, slipping out of it. You simply turned around, still walking.

“No, I’m fine, I have a sweater. You only got that tank top!”

“Yeah, but I am a coldblooded fish…”

“And I am a coldblooded bitch…” you muttered, now walking faster again.

“Woah, what happened? Where are we going?”

“Your place! I uuuuh… I need to crash there for a bit!”

“Wait, what???”

“Yes!”

“Okay, now I DEFINITELY need to know what happened in Sans room after you teleported! And my house is the other direction!” You turned on the heel, walking past her, but she grabbed your arm, forcing you to stop. Your whole body was vibrating. Undyne ignored it and put the leather jacket around your shoulders. “Okay, stop right there, young lady, I want some answers. Laney, what….” She didn’t finish her sentence, instead her one eye moved town to your neck, mouth agape.

“What?” you squealed with a very distinctive undertone of panic. Then, suddenly, her expression lightened up, shifting from disbelief to, well, still disbelief but a happy disbelief, as if she just got a puppy. “ _What_?” your voice was one big squeak by now, your face probably a tomato.

“Elaine, is that a _hickey_????”

Oh lord, please no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WELL, IS IT, ELAINE???


	16. SHAME!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chocotequila, my mortal enemy, enters the stage!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *just imagine me behind Elaine like the SHAME!-Nun from Game of thrones in this chapter please. That is all that I want!

“Okay, please repeat that, the blankets are muffling what you just said!” Undyne giggled, slumped next to on the couch. Alphys was on her other side and you buried underneath a pile of blankets, your face pressed against a pillow. It could be one of the sofa cushions as well, you weren’t sure, you were just hoping to maybe suffocate or die already out of shame. Your face was burning so much, you were sure, that it was about to melt right off of your skull. You simply mumbled something incoherent again, unable to form sentences. “I still can’t understand anything you’re saying!” You pushed the blankets from your face and sat up straight, more shouting than actually speaking.

“Sans and me were battling!” You were too embarrassed to admit it and hoped that Undyne would understand anyways. According to her face she did, very well.

“Oh, Elaine, I am s-sorry… What-What went w-wrong?” Alphys voice was full of empathy, she probably thought, that you were actually arguing again. “You-you two seemed to g-get along bef-“ Undyne interrupted her by gently pressing her fingers against her mouth, her one, piercing, yellow eye still fixed on you, a gigantic grin on her face.

“Ssssssssssssssssssssht…. So you two were…”

“Yes.” You admitted, your face burning.

“And looking at you, it must have been one hell of a facebattle….”

“Yes.” Your voice became smaller and smaller by the second.

“Was it good?”

“Yes.” You quickly grabbed one of the pillows again and pressed your face into it, slightly screaming. Undyne was shrieking just as much.

“U-Undyne, I don’t understand…” Alphys sounded so insecure, oh my god, you felt so bad for invading their private space all of a sudden.

“Alphy, they were _facebattling_. You know…” She hackled again. “Passionately making out in Sans room!” 

“Oh my God, Undyneeeeeeee~” you whined loudly, peaking from behind the pillow.

“Shouldn’t you be moaning Sans name, not mine?” She teased and you threw the cushion at her.

“You are _unbelievable_! I hate you, okay? This isn’t funny!”

“No, but the gigantic hickey on your neck is!” You quickly covered the bruise with the palm of your hand, blushing even more, if that was still possible.

“I can’t believe that he gave me a _hickey_!” you hissed.

“I can’t believe that you kissed Sans!” Alphys giggled and you stared her down.

“Oh not you too. _And he kissed me_!”

“Yes, but you kissed him _back_!”

“Okay, girls, I’ll get the drinks, this is too good to discuss it sober!” Undyne clapped into her hands and jumped up. “And after you, young lady” She pointed at you. “had your first shot, you are going to tell us everything. And I want details! All of them!” Before you could protest, she dashed into the kitchen, quickly returning with three glasses and a bottle of what you recognised as the chocolate tequila you fondly remembered from your teenyears with Curly. God, you could drink that stuff forever, the sweet taste of melted chocolate completely overshadowed the one of the tequila and it went down like butter. So it didn’t come surprising to you that you necked the first glass within seconds, welcoming the warm feeling that started spreading in your stomach area. “Now. Talk!” she demanded and Alphys nodded vigorously.

“I already told you what happened, we were arguing and then-“

“No, I want details. Everything!”

“Is he a good kisser?” Alphys blurted out and Undyne immediately joined in.

“Was it weird kissing his teeth?”

“How did he give you a hickey?”

“Does he have a tongue?” They bombarded you with questions so quickly that you didn’t even have time to answer to them.

“Okay, I need another shot for this…” you mumbled and your fishy friend didn’t hesitate to refill your glass. “And… Yes, he is a good kisser. An amazing one to be honest…” you admitted, gently biting your lower lip, as you remembered the heated moment between the two of you. You drowned your second glass just as quickly as the first one in order to shove the mental image aside. “It wasn’t weird actually, it… Oh god, this will sound so wrong but… fuck, it was pretty good actually. And he gave me the hickey by sucking on my neck. Did you guys know that he can open his mouth? I’ve never seen it before. And yes, he has a tongue. It’s electric blue, in case you were asking yourself. And he has _fangs_!” Your face must have been a bit too over excited at that last part because both of the girls broke out into a laughing fit.

“Oh my god, I can’t believe it. You have a thing for his fangs!”

“No, I don’t!”

“Yes, of course. Girl, I know a kink-face when I see one!”

“Undyne, what the..?”

“You have a kink for that, admit it!”

“Oh, okay fine! I think it’s fucking hot!” You crossed your arms in front of your chest and pouted.

“Wait until he finds out!” She hackled so much that she almost fell of the couch.

“He won’t!” You insisted but Undyne couldn’t hear you anymore, too busy laughing.

“Are you planning to kiss him again?” Alphys asked eagerly, her stutter now completely gone that she overcame her shyness.

“Alphys, I can’t even look at him anymore!”

“Blindfolds…” Undyne wheezed and you slapped her arm.

“Weirdo!”

“No, but… You can’t just run away now!”

“What else am I gonna do?”

“But-but you _kissed_!”

“I know, that’s the problem!”

“How is that a problem?”

“Because I kissed him! Or he kissed me!” You furrowed your brows pensive. “Actually, I don’t really know who started it. I mean, yeah, he took it a step further when he pushed me against the wall and-“

“ _WHAT_?” both of them screeched out in surprise and you flinched just as surprised.

“What?” you echoed.

“He pushed you against the _wall_?”

“You _both_ started it?” It was quite funny, seeing them talk over each other. Undyne poured you some more and you giggled while drinking.

“Uh… yes? To both?” They leaned towards you, looking so interested as if they’d burst if they wouldn’t get their answers immediately.

“And then?” They even spoke in unison now.

“Well…. He picked me up and started…” You pointed towards your neck. “You know…”

“No.”

“You two are just saying that so I need to say it!”

“Yes.”

“You are unbelievable. But fine!” Now slightly tipsy, it was easier talking, your mouth just did the jo before your brain could intervene. “He started sucking on my neck. And boy, was that hot!”

“And then?”

“Papyrus interrupted us and he dropped me. Then I ran away.”

“You can’t run away in a situation like that!” Alphys said accusingly and you blushed, this time not refilling your glass anymore but instead straight up drinking from the bottle.

“I was a bit overwhelmed. Hell, I just had a very passionate make out session with Sans, his cockblocking little brother busted in on us and I was feeling as if my soul was about to explode, which is a weird constant lately and not even Ch- _ouch_!“ Your hand straight up slapped you square against your forehead.

Chara, What the Fuck?

 _I am going to stop you right there_.

No, what the Fuck?

_You were about to blurt out my name. We talked about this, they wouldn’t understand. And you are slightly drunk._

Well, then I’m not drinking enough if I’m only slightly drunk.

“Did you just hit yourself?” Undyne stared at you and you made a weird gesture.

“Yeah, I uhh.. Natural reaction to my own stupidity?”

“Weirdo…” She mumbled but you only shrugged and took another big gulp from the tequila. God, you would regret this so much tomorrow morning. As much as you could take, this one has always been your weak spot. “So, what are we gonna do with you now?” You made a questioning noise, your mouth still busy with the bottle.

“T-To pair you off with Sans of course!” Alphys seemed to have so much fun with the whole situation, which made you happy as well. Oh she was such a sweetheart. “Uuuh, are you sure that you should drink that much?”

“Wha’?” You looked at the bottle, only about 1/3 of it was left over and you made a big, dismissive gersture. “Oh, Pffffffft, yeaaaah, dun worry Alphy! I am Irish blood, I know how to hol’ my liquor!”

“Yeah, that’s why you are swaying already, I can see that!” Undyne retorted dryly but the corners of her mouth were twitching.

“Wha’evaaaa! And you are not gonna hook me up with the numbskull!”

“Why not!” They protested and honestly, they looked so offended, as if you just insulted their cat.

“Because we are _friends_! I do not hook up with _friends_! That’s just gonna turn nasty.”

“You can’t possibly know that!” Undyne insisted but you just laughed sharply, taking another sip.

“Fuck I know. Happened before. Dated two of me best friends. First was turned out to be a complete nutjob and when she ditched me, she tried to ruin my life. Bloody bitch. Second one was bortherline perfect until he cheated on me. So I ditched him. Easy as that. Haven’t seen either of them ever since. Lost most of me friends back then, besides Curls. God, she was just the best lad…”

“I love how your accent’s coming through when you’re drunk…” Undyne chuckled. “But it doesn’t have to turn sour with Sans, maybe it’s gonna work out. Alphy and me here have been friends for YEARS before we ended up together, thanks to Frisk. And look at us, soulmates and everything!” The way she looked at the blushing lizard and the gentleness as she took her hand warmed your heart and made you all mushy.

“How does it feel? The soulmate thing?” you asked shyly and the girls smiled kindly at you.

“There isn’t a better feeling out there…”

“God, I adore the two of ya! ‘s just so cute!” You wriggled happily, hugging your old friend, the chocotequila. Suddenly, your soul gave a weird twitch, a picture flashing before your eye and you let out a loud swear. “SHIT!”

“What?”

“What happened?” Undyne and Alphys stared at you in shock, probably thinking that you hurt yourself or something. You were scrambling off the couch, running towards the first door, the bathroom. “Oh god, do you need to vomit?”

“Sans is coming!” You hissed and slammed the door shut behind you, turning the key and sank to the ground, your head against the wooden board.

“Elaine, that’s crazy, how would you…” The blue fish lady got suspiciously quiet all of a sudden. “Hi Sans. Yep. She’s in the bathroom.” You could hear and felt the colour drain from your face. Dreading, you took another sip from the now almost empty bottle. A sharp knock at the door made you jump a bit.

“Elaine, I know you are in there. Open the door, please!” Sans rumbly voice made your soul twitch towards the door and you glared down your chest.

“Jesus, whatever the fuck is wrong with you, behave yourself!” you whispered, and then louder. “You have reached the automated voicemail of Elaine Winters. Please leave a message or try calling again later!”

“How much did you give her to drink exactly?”

“I don’t really know, I think the bottle should be almost empty now?”

“A whole bottle? Undyne, she’s a human, alcohol can be dangerous to them! And she’s tiny!”

“Fuck you, I’m not tiny!” you yelled, closing your eyes. Meanwhile, outside the bathroom, you had locked yourself in, Sans was staring down Undyne and Alphys, neither of them very comfy.

“It was a bit above the half when we started, so it’s not that bad! And she said, shes fine!”

“She locked herself in a bathroom, that’s not fine to me! Why is she in there anyways? Geee, I shoulda come earlier instead of dragging out Paps bedtime.”

“She uuuh… It’s kinda weird…”

“What?” Undyne looked at Alphys, who was twisting her hands.

“S-She, uuh… She knew, you’d come. Just a few moments before.”

“How would she have known?  I teleported!”

“How did you find out that we are here, anyways, Sans?” The skeleton just sighed, burring his hands in the pockets of his hoodie before he answered the lizard.

“First up, she ran with Undyne. Second of all, I was sensing her soul, ya know, like back at the cinema…”

“S-Since when are you able to sense human s-souls?”

“I’m not. Just hers. Ever since we fought, everything has been weird.” Alphys and Undyne shared a slightly surprised glance with the tiniest hint of panic there and Sans frowned. “Why?”

“Elaines soul has been acting up, according to her…”

“B-but only when you a-are near or if it’s re-revolving around you.” Alphys finished Undynes sentence and straightened her glasses. “M-Maybe you should go and talk to T-Toriel! She knows most about s-stuff like that.”

“Stuff like that? There is nothing going on.” He growled and the blue fish huffed sarcastically.

“Undyne, I think I ate your soap…” You moaned through the door. How does someone accidentally eat soap???

“ _What_?” she roared and pushed Sans out of the way, jiggling the handle.

“It tasted like sadness….”

“Oh god, did she find the chocolate soap?” Alphys whined from behind.

“Why do you own such things?” Sans voice was a bit sharper than intended and Undyne shoved him friendly.

“Because it smells good. Of course she did, It smells and looks like chocolate and we all know that she has a particular soft spot for that. And she’s drunk…” Sans just sighed and knocked at the door again.

“Elaine, open the door and come out here now.”

“No!”

“Then I’ll come in!”

“Can’t, there’s a door in the way!”

“I’ll teleport!”

“Don’t you dare!”

“Oh, you’ll see…” he growled and a second later he stood before you. He wanted to be mad at you, but he couldn’t, not when you were sitting on the floor, the empty bottle next to you and your hands covering parts of your face. He could see tears glistening in your burgundy eyes and went to crouch in front of you, now level.

“Please don’t look at me…” you whined and the sound alone almost broke his heart.

“Why?”

“You hate me. You must hate me. Im so stupid!”

“Why would I hate you? And you are not stupid!”

“W-we kissed and then I ran. I’m sorry everything happened. God, I kissed you twice now. I’m so dumb… Don’t tell Undyne  said that…” you mumbled, your head dropping on your knees.

“Hey, it’s alright. Let’s get you to bed first, shall we?” He offered you his skeletal hand. “Will you come back home with me?” You only shook your head, quickly.

“No, I… Undyne… Can’t, so dumb…”

“Come on, you can’t sleep on the bathroom floor though.”

“You can’t stop me!”

“Elaine, this is ridiculous!” He huffed and suddenly, you were hosted up in the air, clinging to him with dear life.

“Jeeesus, be careful!” you complained, your stomach rummaging from the sudden lift. “Don’t wanna goooo~”  This time you were full on whining, even kicking a little bit. He stepped out of the bathroom and Undyne and Alphys jumped back, suspiciously close to the door. As if they were eavesdropping on you.

“Can we have the guest room, please? She refuses to go home.” You were just pouting, still being carried by Sans. Undyne glanced at Alphys, a grin spreading over her face again.

“UH, YEAH, SURE! WE’RE OFF TO BED NOW ANYWAYS! NIGHT!” She quickly dragged Alphys with her, excitedly whispering to each other. Sans carried you all the way to the spare room, you still a grumpy little leprechaun.

“I can walk, you know?”

“I’m not gonna risk it.” Sans chuckled and only let you down, when he reached the bed. You were so tired, that you could curl up immediately and sleep for two weeks straight. Sans shook his head and gently brushed a strand of hair out of your face. “Sleep now, okay? I’ll be back again tomorrow and _then_ we can talk.” Your hand grabbed his and the words left your mouth before you could think but the sheer pain the prospect of him leaving you now caused to your soul, was unbearable.

“Stay with me.” He looked into your pleading, red eyes and both of you could feel the sudden pull from your souls, pushing towards each other.


	17. Girls are confusing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What even are girls?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As one very smart cookie caught onto, yep, Elaine is a raging bisexual.  
> Do whatever you want with that information now

The next time Sans woke up, you were gone again. He took a deep breath, sitting up on the bed and looking around the room to confirm that this, in fact, hasn’t been a dream for this surely was the spare room in Alphys and Undynes home. The familiar scent of melted chocolate that always surrounded you was still lingering so you were here, at some point.

“I swear to god, that woman is going to be the death of me…” Groaning, he got out of bed, quietly shuffling out of the room. Alphys was sitting on the couch and gave him a shy wave. “Have you seen…?”

“S-She’s in the kitchen.” He didn’t even have to finish the sentence to get his answer. Pleased with the answer, he simply nodded, glad that she didn’t run off in the middle of the night, robbing a soap store or something. His science-pal returned to the book she was reading, _Advanced Bio-Chemistry and its effects on environmental evolution_. He didn’t know what to expect, but surely not what was going on. Undyne was sitting at the table, her upper body draped across the surface and a coolpack on her forehead. The scales around her nose were suspiciously paler than usual. You however seemed in an oddly good mood, your back turned to him, hips swaying to the upbeat music as you stirred something deliciously smelling in the pan on the stove. When you weren’t talking, you were singing along to the song, moving your whole body.

“For the last time Undyne, no, we didn’t have sex last night. I fell asleep pretty much instantly and he would never use an opportunity like that. You said it yourself, he’s a nice guys!”

“But you didn’t even kiss?”

“Nope!”

“You guys are so boring! Besides that, why aren’t you even a little bit hungover?” Undyne whined and you giggled, moving over to the cutting board and quickly cutting up some veggies to throw into the pan.

“I never get hangovers, Undyne. They just cost time and energy, two things I am not willing to waste.” The fish just groaned, finally noticing Sans. She just nodded shortly, burring her head in her arms.

“Wow, you are in a surprisingly upbeat mood this morning…” He smiled confused as you turned around, a big and happy grin on your face.

“There you are. Started to wonder when you would wake up.” You grabbed two plates and put them on the table, one of them in front of Undyne. “I made breakfast, scrambled eggs with vegetables and ham. Some grease to help Undyne with her gigantic hangover. I hope you like it too!” Vary, he sat down, though ignoring the food, Undyne was already hungrily slinging down.

“What… is going on here?”

“What do you mean?” The bright smile you were beaming at him made his soul jump.

“Something changed.”

“I don’t understand? Eat up, it’s getting cold.” She turned around again, putting the dirty dishes into the dishwasher.

“Yesterday you couldn’t even look at me and now you act like nothing is going on?” A piece of egg hung from Undynes fork, stopped halfwhere to her mouth as she watched the two of you.

“Well, because I am going to treat it like that!” Your tone was piqued and distant. The piece of egg dropped back on the plate with a loud splatter.

“You can’t just go and pretend that nothing has happened!”

“Oh watch me how I can!” The chair made an ugly screeching sound as Sans jumped up. Undyne got up as well, puffing her cheeks.

“WELL; BREAKFAST WAS NICE! I FEEL A LOT BETTER ALREADY! SEE YOU THEN!” She almost fled the scene, slamming the door behind her, before opening it again a few seconds later, poking her head into the room. “If you are going to argue again, please don’t ruin the house, we just paid the last lease.” She added before disappearing again. Sans was just glaring at you, as you went to the table, picking up the empty plate to put it away, obviously avoiding his staring eyes.

“Are you really just going to act like that?”

“Yes I am!” you hissed at him. He grabbed your wrist but you wriggled out of it.

“And here I am, thinking that we already figured that avoiding each other and pretending that things are okay would just make things worse.” The drying rag hit him in the face unexpectedly. He wiped it away, ready to blow up on you. He initially came over yesterday night to talk things out, not to have them getting worse. But whatever he wanted to say was shut down by the tears in your eyes and the heartbreaking sob coming from your throat.

“You are such an _idiot_ , Sans!” you cried, tears now spilling over. All anger was wiped from him this instant and he was over within a second.

“Oh god, what did I do?” when you didn’t answer him, so focused on covering your face, it felt as if someone was actually squeezing his soul with an ice-cold hand. “Elaine, please talk to me.”

“You idiot!” you sobbed again before bolting out of the door. The skeleton followed you into the hallway, were a whole bundle of voices were audible. His mood dropped even more, when he saw that Mettaton-his least favourite monster lately, due to some very _specific_ reasons-was standing there, gripping your shoulders, eyebrows furrowed. Alphy was peeking into the room shyly, clearly uncomfortable with everything that’s happening; Undyne was standing next to you, turning her head towards him when he joined the scene.  
_What happened?_ she mouthed at Sand who could do nothing but shrug in confusion.

“Oh darling, please don’t cry!” the robot exclaimed, pulling you into a tight hug. Sans never knew just how much jealousy could hurt up until that exact moment when he saw you return the desperate hug, crying into your favourite TV-stars embrace. The oversized calculator pulled a tissue out of nothing and carefully dabbed at your cheeks. “There, there, everything is all right, I’m right here, love!”  He patted your back empathically. “You know what helps me when I am upset? Some icecream and binge watching my favourite series! And shopping!” A winning smile flashed on the robots face as you nodded timidly.

“Yeah, that does sound nice…”

“Oh, wonderful! Alphys, I’ll be back tomorrow so we can try out the new adjustments we’ve discussed, alright! But I simply _can’t_ let my biggest fan down, not when she is such a _kind_ and _lovely_ sweetheart!”  

“W-What? Oh--- uhm… Yeah, of c-course Mettaton!” Sans made a disbelieving gesture towards you and the calculator, staring at Undyne like he was asking to do about the situation. The blue fishlady returned the gesture like “I don’t even know what’s going on, what do you expect from me?”

“Say, did you ever drive in a limousine?” Mettaton asked you, putting one of his arms around you, leading the sobbing mess towards the door.

“No, I haven’t…”

“Oh, you’ll love it, there’s a ton of space and I even have a cupholder for things like champagne and sorts of on every seat. I’m pretty sure a hoopskirt would fit in there, without collapsing and…” they couldn’t hear the rest of what he was saying, since he got too far away at that time. As soon as the door fell back into the lock, Undyne turned towards Sans, a demanding look in her eye.

“What. The hell. Just happened?” He couldn’t find the right words at first, he was mostly confused. It took him a while to tell everything and when he was done, Undyne took a really deep breath, her hands folded in front of her face. “Sans. You are one of the smartest people I have ever seen but you really, _really_ , have no idea how girls are working, don’t you?”

 

Grumbling, he teleported back into his own home, his mood now so unbelievably ruined, that even his smile was reduced to the bare minimum. Papyrus was sitting on the couch, watching his favourite movie, of course one of Mettatons. Furiously, he grabbed the remote and paused it. His brother looked up to him from the sofa, obviously confused.

“HELLO BROTHER! DID YOU FIND OUR HUMAN FRIEND?”

“Yeah, she’s with the computer now…”

“OH, HOW DELIGHFUL! THEY WERE GETTING ALONG VERY WELL BEFORE. MAYBE THAT WILL BE ABLE TO CHEER HER UP! AND SHE WILL BE SAVE WITH HIM!” Sans buried his hands deep inside the pockets of the blue hoodie, mumbling something incoherent. “ I GUESS THAT MEANS YOU TWO HAVE NOT RESOLVED YOUR CONFLICT YET?”

“No, I think it’s getting worse after all. I think she hates me, for whatever reason” A frown appeared on Papyrus face.

“WHY WOULD SHE DO THAT? AREN’T YOU DATING?”

“W-What? Where did you get that idea from?” A blush spread across his face as his younger brother said that.

“BUT YOU KISSED! UNDYNE SENT ME A VERY DETAILED MESSAGE THIS MORNING!”

“I swear to god, one day I will throw her out of the window!”

“FUNNY, I HEARD THE TINY HUMAN SAY THE EXACT SAME THING!”

“Can’t imagine why…” Sans mumbled. “But Yeah, uuuh…. The situation is complicated, Paps. The..kis… was more accidentally than anything else.” Papyrus frowned some more.

“BUT… DON’T YOU LIKE THEM?”

“Yeah, of course I like her, but…”

“AND THEY OBVIOUSLY LIKE YOU TOO, SO WHERE IS THE PROBLEM?” The shorter skeleton scratched his skull, left speechless by this logic.

“Well… I mean yeah, but… Why does that sound so much easier?”

“BECAUSE I HAVE FAR SUPERIOR DATING TECHNIQUES THAN YOU, SANS! YOU MIGHT BE A SMART COOKIE, BUT IF WE ARE HONEST, YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR THE GREAT PAPYRUS WHEN IT COMES TO LOVE!” Why did everyone keep telling him how much he sucked with this kind of things? Still, he couldn’t help but grin at his brother. There was no better family than him.

“Heh, yeah. You’re so cool, bro!”

“I AM VERY GREAT AFTER ALL!”

“Heh… That you are, Paps… But say, won’t we get a go already? I’m sure Frisk’s already waiting for you to show up for your playdate.”

“OF COURSE! HOW COULD I FORGET? WE ARE GOING TO DISCUSS BATTLE STRATEGIES TODAY!” He didn’t waste another second but rather grabbed Sans and bolted out of the door, on his way to Toriels house. Once they arrived, Paps immediately took off with the child, playing whatever game they were playing. Sans, on the other hand, awkwardly stood in the doorway, carefully eying the queen of monsters. Her lips were curling up into a smile after a few quiet moments.

“You may enter, you know that, Sans? I am not angry with you at all.”

“Oh. Okay.” She snickered and he quickly entered the house. Everything seemed to be back in order again, nothing even hinted at the fight that happened a few days ago. He still felt bad though, so he just sat down in silence, lost in his own thoughts. Unwillingly, his mind wandered back to you and what you were doing right now. Probably having fun with the calculator, not even wasting a single thought on him. Why would you? All he did was causing you more trouble. Maybe he should just leave you alone, you seemed to come by with everyone else protecting you fairly well, so why would you need someone like him, only dragging you down more and more?

“Why the sour face, Sans?” Toriels kind voice ripped him back into reality with a jolt and he looked at her in surprise as she put a full bottle of ketchup in front of him, having a cup of tea prepared for herself and sitting down in her chair that he had dubbed ‘Chairiel’ before and the name still stuck to it.

“It’s…. äh… nothing… Was just thinking about… nothing really”

“Are you sure that the so called “nothing” isn’t a certain human that shares a very peculiar similarity to my own child?” For a few seconds he was left speechless, before he sighed and drank the ketchup straight from the bottle.

“Okay, which one of them told you. And how come that everyone already knows more about this than I do?” Toriel laughed behind her hand.

“Frisk told me after they got a text from Undyne this morning.”

“Great. Are you gonna tell me, how bad I am at this as well?” He crossed his hands, avoiding her face.

“No, I am sure that you are well aware of that anyways. I’d rather help you.”

“And how?” She just smiled at him kindly, sipping at her tea.

“Making you realise what’s bothering you. Sometimes, it’s hard to see what’s going on when you are on the inside but things are clear from the outside.” She shrugged. “Well, for me they are, ut maybe that’s just because I have a magic touch with stuff like that.”

“The please go ahead and enlighten me, because I am at wits end here!” Sans only huffed and leaned back, his arms crossed in front of him.

“I can see it very clearly right here when I look at your soul. You two belong to each other now!” For the first time in ages his smile dropped completely.

“What?”

“Your souls are bonded, Sans.”

“ _What_?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH YEAH; JUST IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING, ELAINE LOVES DANCING BUT SHE REALLY SUCKS AT IT


	18. The thing about love...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ROMANCE N SHIT!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the absence, It was con-weekend so I was pretty busy *^* But it was worth it and I am so proud of my Cosplays, one of then Undertale (as usual by now, lmao) 
> 
> Also, prepare for trouble. Shit's happening soon

Mint ice-cream has always been your favourite, you simply loved how the rich and sweet taste of the chocolate perfectly harmonised with the slightly spicy and cool flavour of mint as it melted on your tongue. You could eat entire buckets of it, without getting sick, literally the only thing next o normal chocolate and tea. Gently humming, you put another spoonful in your mouth, letting it melt away slowly and savouring every last bit of it. Oh yes, you loved mint ice-cream and the one Mettaton had gotten you was one of the best, you’ve ever tried. Half the container was already emptied out by you over the course of the last hour. You were currently sitting on the gigantic luxurious leather couch in his Apartment, the robot himself seated on the floor, still tall enough to look right into your eyes.

How frustrating.

You were currently watching one of your favourite movies while discussing something, he liked to call as “boy troubles” aka, love and trash talk, everyone’s favourite subject.

Just a few months back you were stuck at the second worst place ever but time has passed, obviously. Who would have thought that one day, you’d sit in your favourite TV Stars living room, stuffing your face with ice cream, crying about boys while the two of you’d be wearing facemasks and all sorts of beauty shenanigans, but look at you now.

“And he really didn’t get, why you were acting that way?”

“No, I swear to God, he is as oblivious as his brother sometimes. No, wait, I take that back, _Papyrus_ gets girls more than that knucklehead!”

“Paps can be quite mature from time to time…” Mettaton admitted and avoided your gaze, a tiny smile on his lips. “But I get what you mean. Sans can be very stubborn, despite his very relaxed demeanour.” A certain kind of sadness lingered in his voice, which made you sad as well.

“You two don’t get along very well, do you?” Your voice was quiet and full of empathy. Your opposite just shrugged and you put another spoonful in your mouth, letting it melt, as you listened to the story.

“Well, not really. He doesn’t like me very much, think’s that I am not the best influence for his brother. You know him with Papy.” Wait, does he know that that….? “We’ve had our differences in the past. But we can get along and work together, if we have to.”

“Like that time at the movies… Say, what exactly were you doing with that tape of yours?”

“Oh, nothing special~ I just wrote that gentlemen a little note, that he should stay away from our humans if he doesn’t want his little outburst somehow end up on the internet. That usually showed itself very effective.”

“So you were blackmailing him.” You sounded very distant for a second there, but a smile was tugging at the corners of your mouth.

“Blackmailing is such a hard word, but yes, you could say that…” You snorted while stretching until your joints popped back. It was such a liberating feeling, taking some of the pressure off of you. “But back to the important things. Your boycandy”

“That’s still one of the best words ever, just so you know… but yeah, Sans. I mean, Yeah, I like him a lot and we made out, but it would never work out between us. And I’d rather keep him as a friend than lose him forever.”

“But why wouldn’t it work out?” Metta put on his best pout but you just smiled sadly.

_Well, maybe because I killed everyone he knows before? Including him?_

And that you are a part of me.

_And you are a part of me._

That too….

_He wouldn’t understand_

No one would

_It’s to keep you safe_

It’s better like that

_I don’t want you to get hurt_

I’m not gonna abandon you

_I am sorry_

I am not. It’s better like that.

“We are too different.” You simply answered, leaving out the quick exchange with Chara, still smiling however.

“Differences can be overcome, dear.” His voice was soft and kind it warmed your soul. In moments like that, he remembered you of your aunt. Well, your aunt before the accident. Haven’t seen her ever since.

“I’m sure, he would just hate me once the differences would show”

“How yould he hate such a pure and sweet little muffin like you?” He seemed so offended, you had to laugh.

“Because Sans is stubborn. He would understand.”

“Understand what?”

“Some of the things I do for those, closest to me…”

 

Sans was staring at Toriel in a state of total shock and disbelief, his mind a complete haze, going completely blank.

“Excuse me, _what_?” The Queen of Monsters just took another sip of her tea, quietly smiling to herself. “No, please go on, Tori, explain to me what you mean that _me and Elaine are bonded_?” He didn’t need a mirror to know, that his eyesockets were probably completely hollow, devoid of all light and empty like his brain right now. She put down the cup with the loud clack porcelain usually makes, a faint smile on her face.

“I can only assume how and why it happened, but looking at your soul-a talent of mine, as you might know-I can see a piece missing, now replaced by another. For whatever reason, all I see when looking at the Humans, is a glitchy haze, surrounding theirs, like fog. I guessed that it is due to their immense suffering. One of my first children, Chara, also had a soul that was stained with the scars of their past, so I am not surprised to see this. The piece, which has replaced yours, is very similar to that. And on the opposite, when I look at the human, something has changed; their soul is growing stronger and more active, I’ve never seen anything like that before. But alas, never before has a human bonded with a monster, so we can’t be sure, that this isn’t just normal behaviour.”

“But… how…?”

“This is just a speculation, but I figured, that the two of you, when you fought, must have barred your souls for each other and they recognised each other as a match.”

“A…match?”

“You can’t deny, that you fancied the human before that, Sans” Toriel grinned at him and he just grunted something incomprehensible. “But, yes, a match. That the two of you belonged together in some state or form. And all it needed, was a….” Sans touched his teeth with fingers gently, realisation now occupying his mind.

“A push. The kiss. When she kissed me…”

“She took in all of your overflowing magic, to bring you back to your senses. But she couldn’t just leave you like that, the now missing energy would have killed you, for sure. So she…”

“Left a piece of hers, to…”

“To save your life, you are right, Sans.” Toriel finished the sentence for him. His whole body tingled.

“Humans aren’t meant to hold magic.”

“That is true”

“She should have died from what she did for me.” If Sans would have had eyebrows, they would have met by now.

“Also true”

“She was ready to die and save me! And that… Bonded us together.”

“Again, very true, Sans.” He could feel his soul beat hard at the sudden revelation. But maybe also because of something else.

“Why would she do that?” Toriel giggled.

“Why would she? Why did you try to stay away from her, fearing what you could do to her, with all those weird emotions inside of you?”

“To protect her from… oh!” The kindly goatmonster smiled gently and took another sip. “I have one more question though…”

“Yes, Sans?”

“ _How the hell did she survive_?”

 

“Metta, can I ask you a weird question?” The worlds most beloved robot smiled  toothy grin at you.

“But of course darling!”

“Is it possible, that you have a crush on someone?” The weird choking sound he made was answer enough for you and also made you laugh.

“But-how? I never…”

“Just female intuition. You know too well how this whole love thing feels right now!”

“AHA! So you admit, that you do have feelings for Sans!” He pointed at you accusingly and you grinned while rolling your eyes.

“Duh, I’m just not gonna admit it to him, like ever. It’ll go by after a while. It always does. And I don’t have time for love. But nevermind that! I am right, aren’t I?” A blush spread across his face and you couldn’t help but be impressed. The robotic body Alphys made was very humanoid, even with its bodily functions apparently. He sighed and shrugged.

“Well, since you admitted, I think that I have to admit it as well. So yes, yes, I do have feelings for someone!”

“It’s Paps, isn’t it!”

“How in the heavens name did you…?!”

“You called him “Papy”, and I’m pretty sure that you know Spanish, I’ve watched your Tuesday night show _Noooo, Asgoro!_ So _You_ know what “Papy” actually means as well. And you speak very fondly of him. And it would explain why you and Sans don’t get along, after all he really loves his brother. And from a big sisters point of view, I’d be pretty protective of my young little sapling and vary of whom they’d be dating and seeing. It’s nothing personal, just a sibling kind of thing.” For a few seconds he seemed baffled before smiling again.

“You notice more than you let on at the beginning, my dear. And yes, you are right. But please, don’t tell anyone. I don’t want to upset anyone. I’ve accepted it by now anyways.” You smiled at him, kindness and empathy in your voice.

“Of course not. But I’ll help you. If I can’t get y cute skeleton boy, than at least you will!” Suddenly, he scooped you in for a grand, big hug.

“Oh, darling, aren’t you just the sweetest! Always thinking of others before yourself!” A burning blush spread across your face, and you tried to brush off the compliment.

“Oh pffft, that’s nothing! I’m grateful enough for what you’ve been doing for me anyways. It’s such a relief to finally get out and do things again, Metta. And since I am with you, no one will be worried that I am in danger or some shit. That whole thing makes it kinda hard to try and find a job” you laughed, still flustered and blushed.

“Well, then why aren’t you just working for me?”

“W-what?” you sputtered, the colour now quickly draining from your face.

“Yes! I could need someone with a sharp tongue like you and the talent of just noticing things other people overlook. And you are a very honest person, so I wouldn’t have the problem of people trying to appease me instead of giving me constructive criticism, even though that’s what I need.  And you would be as safe as ever, I swear on my creator! So, what are you saying?”

“Uh, what kind of question is that?” you sputtered dumbfounded. “Of course, yes, yes, Oh my god, I am working for you! With you! Aaaaah, this is a dream come true! Holy shit. _Yes_! Thank you Metta! This is… How can I ever. Yes!” Your brain was just in a constant mode of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! Ever since he proposed the job offer to you and it refused to stop screaming.

“Oh, how delightful! Aaah, yes, and I swear by my very artificial robot soul, that nothing can happen there, love!” You giggled and rolled your eyes.

“Don’t worry about your ghostly soul, Metta, I’m sure everything will be fine and the best job I’ve ever had!” you winked at him and his mouth fell open.

“What? But how can you…”

“You are not the only one with secrets and a weird soul, hun.” Your lips stretched into that wide yet just a tiny bit creepy smile, Chara usually loved to smile. “After all, you could say that I have a shattered one at the moment!”

_I really hope for you that he understands it as shattered because of love and not because that’s how it’s actually is…_

He did. Mettaton pulled you into a tight hug again, sniffling dramatically. “Oh, darling! I can’t bare hearing those words from you! I swear, one day you’ll find your happiness and joy and love! And I will help you with your boney boy, just like you want to help me!”

He is so pure

_And you are lucky_

Hey, no one’s gonna find out.

_And even if they’d did. I’d always protect you._

And I will protect you with everything I have. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All the ships. Fuck you, let's make it a bit cute befor just rip everyting apart again, Muhahahahaha 
> 
>  
> 
> fear me!


	19. Welcome at MTT GO FUCK YOURSELF, how can I help you today?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MTT GO FUCK YOURSELF is my new favourite thing.... Honestly, you guys should look at my notes, I should not take them when I am sleep deprived, it's nothing but memes and sadness 
> 
> SQUATS FOR DAYS! GO, TEAM UNDYNE!

“Did you know that Metta already won three Golden Globes _and_ an Oscar this year alone, Papyrus?” You were sitting on the floor, stretching together with Undyne, as you joined them with their warm up today. You were in the mood for some sport, so you would start out with them and then move over to some simple yoga or stuff while they’d have fun with their battle strategies-or what you could believe a bit more-beat the crap out of each other and then heal up like it’s nothing. You’ve never been much of a fighter. Oh, yes, you knew how to defend yourself, bless your aunt and mother for that, but being a through and through pacifist, you’d rather do something else. And even if there’d be a worst case scenario where you were on your own without your friends help, you weren’t alone. Chara was still the most badass person you’ve ever seen in your life. If they couldn’t kick butts, then no one could.   
“YES, HE INVITED ME TO ONE OF THE EVENTS! SADLY, I COULDN’T GO SINCE THE HOSTS WEREN’T THE MOST FRENDLY TOWARDS MONSTERS! BUT I WATCHED IT ON MY TELEVISION!” Papyrus whole face seemed to light up, as you brought up the robot again, like you did suspiciously often lately, totally not with the thought of pairing him with the skeleton. Nope. You’d never even think about such a thing as playing Amor!  
“Oh, that’s a shame, hun! I’m sure you would have been a formidable entourage! And people would love you two!” You stretched out your legs in front of you and leaned forward until you were basically folded in half and touching your toes with ease.

“DO YOU REALLY THINK, HUMAN?”

“Yeah, of course!”

“YEAH; PAPS! Who wouldn’t love you!” Undyne chirped in and flashed a toothy grin, still doing her squats for days.

“OH, YOU TWO FLATTER ME!”

“Noooo, Metta said it too, he thinks very fondly of you!”

“Fufufuf, you seem to like the new job, Laney!”

“Yes, I love it, Undyne!” A smile crept its way on your face. “It’s fantastic. I basically just sort files and stay on top of the appointments, but it fantastic over there! I’d love to get a chance to see the record label stuff sometime… Well, just the music and how they make it and everything.”

“DO YOU LIKE MUSIC HUMAN?”

“Yes, a lot, Paps!” You switched again, this time into an almost-split, again, leaning forward, until your torso touched the ground. This time, the muscles in your legs were starting to pull a little bit.

“Geee, how flexible are you, tiny!?” You pouted a bit and put your chin on your hands, still draped over the floor.

“First of all, I am not tiny! If you call me tiny one more time, I promise you, you gigantic California roll, I will start wearing the highest high heels I can find and never take them off again. Secondly, very, I’ve always been. Mom always said that I lack the tendons and muscles. But I guess I am just very stretchy.”

“Nerd, you could walk on stilts and you’d still be smol!” You stuck out your tongue at her and she laughed.

“Oh yes? I’d make sure to constantly step on your toes, so be careful! “

“Now that’s a threat!” You turned your head as you heard the deep chuckle, entering from the hallway.

“OH, HELLO BROTHER! WILL YOU JOIN OUR TRAINING SESSION TOO?”

“Naw, ‘m fine, Paps. Not much of a sporty type.”

“YOU ARE SO LAZY, SANS! YOU SHOULD TAKE NOTES FROM THE HUMAN, THEY WERE JUST TELLING US ABOUT THEIR NEW JOB AT METTATONS!”

“Yeah, I heard it, after all, they barely stop talking about him. Seem to be head over heels for him!” There was still a grain of bitterness in his voice, so while Undyne and Papyrus groaned and expressed their hatred towards his pun, you just glared slightly. Sans returned the glare and you moved your upper body, now leaning towards one side instead of the middle. The shorter skeleton obviously noticed, judging from the blush on his cheeks. You soul gave a happy twitch and you couldn’t help but smile smugly to yourself.

_You can be so mean sometimes…_

I’ve learned from the best

Undyne finally stopped doing squats while playing around with the weights, straightening up again and fixing her high ponytail. Papyrus got up as well, looking down at you, refusing to get up from your strangely comfortable position of a split, still folded in half and then again to look up.

“I’m done with the warm-up, wanna start with the real deal?”

“OF COURSE, UNDYNE!” His smile stretched a bit more, getting more and more excited. “WILL YOU BE ALRIGHT, HUMAN?”

“Sure, go ahead. I told you, I’m a lover not a fighter, as they say. I’ll stay right here in Undyne’s living room and do yoga until you come back.”

“GREAT!”

“We’ll see that we’ll be back soon, okay?” Undyne’s tone was sober and slightly worried, glancing towards Sans, who was still staring at you, for just a second.

“Oh, don’t stress. If I’ll get bored, I’ll find _something_ to do.” The fish lady opened her mouth and you knew exactly what she wanted to say-probably something along the lines of “Or some _ONE_!” and then you would have hit her or thrown something. So you just stared at her intensely, shaking your head just barely noticeable. She giggled and you stuck out your tongue, as usual.

“Oh, I know you will. We’ll get out of your hair for now.”

“GOODBYE BROTHER AND TINY HUMAN! BE SAFE!”

“You too, Paps!” you smiled up until Undyne stuck her head back into the living room for just a second.

“Oh yea, Alphys should be home around 7:30 to eight o’clock sharp. And well be gone for at least 3-4 hours. So please, don’t do anything rash!”

“Move it, idiot!” you called, laughing. You resumed your routine, keen on ignoring the Skeleton who was watching you so intensely, even though your face already started reddening up under the heated stare. Sans moved over to the sofa, still observing you but you avoided looking at him on purpose. You wouldn’t crack.

After five minutes, you did.

The smug grin on his face kept disturbing your focus and distracting you. Your heart was pounding in your chest, you were sure that it was about to explode. Groaning you sat down on the floor, biting your lip.

“Something bothering you, pal?” Sans winked at you and instead of exploding, your heart skipped a beat or two.

“Yes, you are!” You admitted and he looked at you in surprise. “You should take a picture, so you can save it for later and stop distracting me!”

“Oh, so I am distracting you?”

“That’s what I just said!” There was something new in his face, almost predatory. It didn’t scare you, on the contrary, a shiver went down your spine as he got up, slowly creeping closer to you, hands in his pockets.

“ _Yoga_ nna tell me why?” You snorted involuntarily, giggling at his stupid pun.

“Oh, you are just the worst! _Yoga_ tta be kidding me!”

“Now, you had to _bend over backwards_ to get that one, didn’t you?” Your grin spread even more.

“That one was a _stretch_ , Sans!”

“Guess you just need a flexible kind of humour for those kinds of puns.” He simply shrugged and winked at you, still a giggly mess on the floor. The skeleton stretched out his arm for you. “Come on, let me give you a _hand_ to get _upwards, dog_.”

“Numbskull…” you mumbled with a smile but gripped his hand. Surprisingly, he could pull you up no problem, you didn’t even have to do much on your own. Once you were back up on your feet, you didn’t know what to say, and neither did Sans, judging by the sudden silence between you. You didn’t notice how close you were standing next to each other, just that your soul seemed to be chirping happily, like a little bird. Admittedly, it was quite annoying by now. Couldn’t your goddamn stupid soul just behave for once? Your eyes fell on the gigantic window at the front side of Undyne’s house that was facing the small garden. It looked so idyllic, especially right now, the red light of the sunset shining into the living room and tinting everything a warm, golden tone, reflecting off of the grand piano. As if in a trance, you let go of Sans hand and walked over, a magical kind of wonder on your face when you looked outside, one hand placed on the windowsill.

“Elaine?” The skeleton sounded quite vary, not too sure about you sudden distraction. You turned your head, an enchanted smile on your face.

“Look Sans…. It’s starting to snow.” You loved the snow, it amazed you. Every time snow would fall from the sky, it was as if the world halted and got wrapped up in a blanket, just waiting for… something. And it was so beautiful, the sun reflecting off of the white surface, making the individual crystals glimmer and sparkle, for you, it was one of the most beautiful things ever. Sans joined you at the window, rather looking at your face than the heavy snowflakes outside, but you didn’t notice. You didn’t know why, but seeing the snow outside made you so incredibly happy, all you could do was smile and listen to the growing heartbeat in your ears. Still looking outside in some state of childish wonder, you sat down at the piano chair about two feet away from you. You could feel Chara gave a twitch when you sat down, your right arm suddenly itching. Closing your eyes, you continued to smile, your fingers starting to tap along the keys, a sweet melody echoing from the inside of the grand piano. You’ve heard Undyne play on it a couple of times-she was simply amazing, even though a bit over enthusiastic, as usual-and every time, you could feel this want from inside you, that wasn’t entirely yours. So now, that you had the chance to, you just let it play out by itself, gently humming along to the song, Chara was playing. Well, you were playing. Or… was it Chara, playing a song with you?

“I didn’t know that you could play the piano.” Sans gentle voice startled you, breaking your concentration and your hands stopped moving, a strange tranquillity filling you. The smile returned to your face, this time a lot sadder though, as he sat down next to you.

“I don’t actually. Never liked the piano. Love how it sounds, hate how it plays. Lizzie’s always been the piano enthusiast of us. I’ve always preferred the violin and my own voice over it. But that isn’t hard, those were two of my favourite things.” Confusion flared over his face for a second, but it could have been a trick on your eyes.

“Then how did you…” He stopped halfway, gently shaking his head. “I’ve never seen you play the violin. You hum a lot or sing very quietly, never loud enough to hear much but I didn’t know about the strings.”

“Yeah, it’s a bit hard to play without one” you chuckled, placing your head on his shoulder, not really thinking about it, it just felt right. “Hugh took mine and I can’t afford a new one. But it’s alright, he didn’t take my voice.”

“Yeah, you are too feisty for that.” You shoved him a little bit but he moved back, putting an arm around you. “How are you though?”

“I’m alright….” You whispered, still smiling.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“You should know that, Sans…”

“Is there something going on between you and the calculator?” Surprised, you sat up again, looking at him, even though he avoided your eyes.

“What?”

“You talk a lot about him, and I wondered…”

“Oh god no!” you said a bit to quickly and repulsed. “I mean, I love him, but like you love your gay best friend. And he is nothing more than that, I swear. Besides that, he doesn’t like me that way either!” Sans seemed so insecure right now, it almost broke your soul. What did he fear? What could he possibly fear, especially after Toriel was so keen on explaining you, what has happened to the two of you in every detail just a bit more than two weeks ago. Your face was still burning at the thought and you still refused to admit, what you were truly thinking or feeling.

“How can you be so sure?”

“God, he’s gonna kill me…. And you are gonna kill me too but… He has a crush on someone else, I keep bringing him up to make him look really great, you know. It’s matchmaking 101. I want him to be happy. I want everyone to be happy….” He sighed, both relieved and tired.

“You are too pure for this world, I swear…” You put your head back down on his shoulder, staring outside at the snow again. The grass already started to become white, get engulfed by the thick blanket and have everything covered with silence. Your heart started beating faster once more, a bony arm around your waist.

“Elaine, I…”

“Don’t say anything. You can guess it but I am not gonna say it.” You knew what he wanted to talk about but you weren’t ready. Things would change and there was only one possible outcome once he did and that was despair for all of you. Hiding your second half was getting harder now anyways, and once it would be impossible, both you and Chara knew that they would despise you. You wanted to keep the peace and calamity as long as you could. It was going to end soon anyways, you could feel it. Just a few more moments, you begged, just let me hold on a little longer.

It was moments like there that you were grateful to have Chara, you couldn’t stand the loneliness inside of you on your own. At least, you’d always have each other. It was so quiet now that the sun has disappeared, the moon rising and illuminating the room with its pale, silvery light. You were just sitting there in complete silence, not knowing how much time has passed, before Sans broke it.

“Hey, doll….”

“Yeah, bone boy?” He chuckled at the nickname before getting serious again, the hand on your waist gripping ever so slightly faster, and your heartbeat oh so loud, cheeks flushed.  

“Go on a date with me.”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ffffffffffuck it, I'm in the mood for some cutie stuff and fluffnuggets.   
> At least for now


	20. Chara

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHAT EVER COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

You didn’t know why you agreed to this.

This was such a bad idea, probably one of your worse ones. No matter how happy you were that Sans had asked you out, no matter how much your soul-your stupid soul, that was bonded to him-ached for it, no matter how nice it seemed; it was still stupid. You shouldn’t encourage a romantic relationship with the skeleton, not right now and not ever, not when it would be build up upon lies. Sooner or later, he’d find out and then it would hurt all of you so much more. The wise thing to do would be to stay away from everyone you could endanger or be problematic to but you idiot just did the complete opposite. But where would you even go? Where _could_ you go? Could you go back?

Probably not.

You’ve grown soft and accustomed to the people around you, giving you somewhat protection and comfort, you weren’t on edge all of the time anymore. One would consider that as something good, an improvement. For you and Chara, however, it meant that you let your guard down. And that itself was a problem on its own, not to mention dangerous. You needed to be on edge, needed to stay aware in order to survive and keep under the radar, to keep each other safe.

You still applied the soft pink lipgloss to your pouted lips, it was the one that smelled of vanillacake and had the golden specs of glitter in it; trying to push the nagging feeling inside of you away. This was supposed to be a nice evening. You looked cute as a button, the brown wedge heels making your legs look astronomically good, accentuating the skintight navyblue jeans. The white oversized knitted jumper gave you and adorable but at the same time more adult appearance, not like a 12 year old, more like your own age. Even your eyeliner was on fleek, so sharp it could stab a bitch. Sans was already waiting in the hallway, ready to go, as you put on your coat. It was still snowing outside, coating the world in a white blanket. A light blue tint spread across Sans cheeks when he saw you, matching your red one.

“Ready to go?” you asked quietly, brushing a strand of hair back behind your ear.

“S-Sure!” He seemed just as insecure as you were, which made you feel a lot easier, since you weren’t the only one that was nervous. You gave him a bright smile and oxtered with him. It was a nice evening, the late sun made the snow glisten in the most beautiful way. Everything seemed so quiet as well, barely any cars were driving down the road you were walking along in a comfortable silence.

“I know this park!” you said to Sans, pointing towards the entrance. “My sister had a photoshoot there once before! It was spring back then, but I can remember it clearly. We got lost on the way here since the friend, who’d take the pictures misread the map so badly that we almost ended up in a completely different part of town.” You giggled a bit at the thought. “It was a nice day though, she had so much fun. I mean, I was just helping out a bit and fulfilling my big-sister-duties, but all of us enjoyed it so much!”

“You wanna take a stroll through it? We are not in a rush, so…” You beamed up at the skeleton and nodded excitedly. Carefully, you crossed the street and entered the quiet park. It was practically empty, most people would wait until the snow had stopped falling, but you were quite thankful for that. You adored this calm tranquillity, it was so comforting. The part itself hasn’t changed much but it was still as beautiful as ever. You face was probably completely awestruck and you didn’t notice how Sans was looking at you. “You miss her a lot, don’t you?” he suddenly asked. He didn’t need to specify who he was talking about, you knew he was talking about your sister. Thoughtful, you lowered our head, thinking about your answer for a few moments.

“Of course I miss her, she was my little babysister. She reminds me a lot of Papyrus, to be honest… Both of them are such sweethearts with a heart that’s way too big for their own good. She’s always been the one, that had all of the possibilities for her future, I was so proud of her. I still can’t believe that she’s gone, so soon… so young. She and Paps would be the same age now, you know… Maybe that’s what’s helping me so much lately. I’ve still got Paps and Frisk and Undyne to take care of and pamper with my sisterly blessings, I’m a total fairy squad mom with you guys. That eases the pain a bit. It never fully goes away, but it makes it easier. I really miss her but there is no reason to sulk 24/7 and just stop. She wouldn’t want that. So all I can do now, is taking care of everyone else, making sure that no one ever will get hurt like that again. I am sure you understand, when I say that I would do everything for my siblings and the ones closest to me.”

“Yeah. I… I don’t even wanna think about losing Papyrus, to be honest…”

 _Do you think, he means_ remember, _but can’t say it?_

Maybe. Maybe he doesn’t talk about the resets… We don’t talk about the resets either.

_Yes, but we still have each other, he suffers through it alone_

Sometimes, you are such a smartass.

 _Yes, yes I am_.

“It must be horrible, to lose him….” You mumbled. “Be careful, there is a lake ahead of us, if I remember correctly. It’s not really visible right now because of the snow and since it’s so level with the ground but I doubt, that it’s completely frozen already.” You warned him and changed directions, to avoid stepping on the ice. “But yeah, uuh… Where was I again?”

_Losing Papyrus_

“Right, yeah! It’s good how protective you are over Paps… You are a good brother, Sans. I don’t even think he notices what you do for him sometimes, but that’s what the older ones usually do. As long as their tiny ones are safe and sound, it doesn’t matter.”

“You’re right. He’s the only family I’ve got left ever since my dad just… vanished. He is one of the purest souls you’ll ever see in your life. Back in the underground, when the barrier was still up, he tried so hard to get into the royal guard, you know? He was stationed at the entrance to the ruins, always looking for humans, to impress Undyne enough so she’ll let him in. So when the kid came around, he obviously tried to capture them but you know Papyrus…”

“He probably gave ‘em a bunch of puzzles but couldn’t muster to harm them.” You said with a crocked smile. “He loves his puzzles and japes”

“Exactly.” Something flashed across his face, even though for just a second. “At the end, he had to fight Frisk but he couldn’t even manage to hurt them, nonetheless kill them. He actually managed to capture them twice but couldn’t muster locking the door of our shed, in case something would happen. In the end, he befriended Frisk and they went on a date.” You snorted.

“Oh my god, they went on a date? I swear to god, Frisk is the biggest flirt ever! I guess they didn’t end up together? He probably turned them down, saying something goofy like “ _Don’t be sad that I won’t kiss you, because I don’t even have lips!”_ or something along those lines!”

_Too accurate!_

“Uuuh, yeah.  That’s pretty much spot on actually…” Sans seemed surprised but you kept your smile up, acting innocent.

“Oh, sweet Papyrus, he can be really predictable sometimes.”

“Maybe you just know him very well…”

“Probably!” you answered cheerily.

“Can you keep a secret?”

“Of course I can.”

 _Duh_.

Oh shuddup!

“I was pretty afraid, when he was fighting the kid. Back then, I still wasn’t sure if I was talking to the adorable little pacifist pipsqueak we know today or a homicidal maniac. The stories we’ve heard about humans were all back from the war, when killing monsters was common for your kind. What if they decided that Paps isn’t worth their time and just flat out kill him? He wouldn’t know what would strike him, he’d be busy trying to convince them, that there would be a better way. He still thinks that even the worst person can change with just enough kindness. And I couldn’t do anything at all to save him…” You could fell Chara writhe uncomfortably inside of you, so you put one hand over your heart and smiled comforting.

Hey. We talked about that. It’s not your fault…

_I know. I still feel guilty though._

Don’t. You aren’t

_You are the only one that believes that, Elaine._

I am the one that is right.

_Where do you take the confidence to say that?_

Because I know you. I am part of you, just as you are part of me.

_You are too nice for your own good._

And you are too cynical for your own good.

_That I am, I never denied that._

“Sans, he is safe now. Frisk would never harm anyone, you know that. And all of us-you, Undyne, Metta, Frisk, Alphys, me… Even Toriel and the king-will make sure that nothing’s ever gonna happen again. This is the happy end you guys deserve and no one can take that from you. Things happen for a reason, even if you don’t see it. You could use a bit of optimism, dear.”

“Yeah, I might lack that one a bit, Heh… I still don’t know how you manage to stay so positive all the time.” You nudged him with your elbow, still smiling.

“Just admit it, you are just jelly of my constant optimism.” You cleared your throat, your eyes fixating something in the distance, a serene smile on your lips. “Sorry…I… nevermind…” Your right hand reached up and swiped across your eye, wiping away a tear that had for whatever reason crept its way out of your eye. You furrowed your brow, wiping your hand on your coat.

Chara, my make up!

 _You still look flawless_.

“Heh, I’m sorry, I ruined the mood now.” Sans apologised and you looked at him in surprise.

“What?” You had stopped, the skeleton a few steps ahead of you. He didn’t look at you, his hands buried in his hoodie. Quietly, you crouched down, picking up a handful of snow. You straightened up just when he turned around to face you, hiding your hands behind your back.

“This was supposed to be a nice date, and now the subject is all depressing and I made you sad again. I’m sorry that-“ The snowball hit him square in the face and you burst out in laughter at the sight.

“Sans, you worry too much!” you giggled and he wiped the rest of the snow from his face, still completely floored.

“You…” he growled and you bit your lip, still grinning. Slowly he bowed down and picked up some snow for himself. Still howling with laughter you broke out in a sprint, just barely avoiding the frozen fluffiness zooming past you. “Come back here, so I can return the favour!”

“As if!” you yelped, starting to throw snow at him yourself as he chased you across the park. Both of you were in a complete giggly mood. You were just about to dodge another projectile, as you felt a slight yank at your soul, keeping you were you were, so you were showered in the white flurry. Glaring back at Sans, you saw the blue aura around his hand and the one glowing eye. “Sans, that’s unfair, you can’t use your magic like this!”

“Why not!”

“It gives you an unfair advantage!” He simply shrugged and the tug on your soul stopped. As quick as possible, you chugged another handful of snow into his face, now not even an armlength away from you and started running again. You mistook a step however and started slipping on the ground. A strange yelp left your mouth, as you started falling, grabbing onto the closes ting to you-Sans. Together you were tumbling to the ground, a tangled mess of limbs. Once you came to a halt, you were laying on the frozen, snow-covered ground, Sans on top of you, his arms next to your head, so he wouldn’t crush you. Your face started blushing again, however not from the heat or the sprint but the close proximity to the skeleton; he was covered in a slight blue tinge as well.

“Got you!” he whispered teasingly. Your heart was racing, as you slowly raised your arms, putting them around his neck, whispering his name. Awestruck hit him as you slowly pulled him closer, pouting your lips just the slightest bit. Just before your lips were about to meet his mouth-WHACK!

You smeared a whole load of snow in his face again, scrambling out from underneath him, grinning confidentially.

 _You are so evil sometimes_ ; Chara heckled, howling with laughter.

You smirked, more than content with yourself.   
I am glad to serve.

“You goddamn tease…” Sans growled and you simply giggled, giving him a cheeky wink.

 

The interior of Grillby’s was cozy and warm. The heat made your skin prickle, especially since your clothes were completely soaked after your snowwballfight in the park. You’ve heard of the monster bar before but you’ve never been here before, something you honestly regretted now. As soon as you entered, a choir of cheers greeted you, all of them directed towards Sans, his grin now smug. You removed your coat as you sat down at the bar, placing it over the back of the chair.

“Who’s your friend, Sans?” a minotaur a few chairs away called. Who the hell wears shades inside, but no shirt…. Especially at this weather? Monsters are weird.

“Hi, I’m Elaine!” you greeted, smiling at him and waving kindly.

“Oho~” _oho_? “So that is the mysterious little human Sans kept talking about!” Your smile dropped a bit at the little part, but you tried to keep it up as good as possible. Said skeleton next to you started blushing furiously, which made you giggle. “So, are you two on a date~ right now?” He tried to tease, as if the idea alone would be ridiculous on itself, like that’s something they’d tease him with all the time but knew that it was just empty talk. Your smile widened again.

“Actually, yes.” Your tone was almost sickeningly sweet, just like your smile, but there was a hint of a threat in your eyes. For a moment it was really quiet in the bar, before the big commotion broke out. Someone even patted Sans shoulder and you felt hugged from behind, which you did not feel comfortable with. It felt slimy and the someone breathed his hot breath down your neck. A disgusted shiver went down your spine.

_Eeeew, it was that weird fish dude._

The one with the fishing line?

_Yes_

EW! I’m gonna burn my clothes later!

“W-Well done, S-Sansy!” one of the monsters called, it looked like a rabiddhead bouncing up and down excitedly.

“Oh, he is allowed to call you Sansy and I’m not?” you said in an accusingly teasing tone, a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth.

“He is not. He’s just doing it!” he defended himself and you giggled, grabbing the menu in front of you. “So, what’cha gonna eat?”

“Can you recommend anything?”

“Yeah, the burgers are really good. Fries too.”

“Burgers? Fries?”

“These are really special; Grillbz makes ‘em with monster magic infused.”

“That sounds oddly sexual when you say it like that… But whatever, I’ll try it!”

“Great. Hey, Grillbz, two of the burgs please.” The bartender, a tall and slender man, made out of fire nodded and went to the backroom. You heard a glass shatter and turned around, scanning the bar. On the very back table, a few human boys had made themselves comfortable, obviously already slightly drunk. They were shouting, one of them had dropped a bottle. Your brows furrowed and Chara stirred inside of you again, this time way more vary and protective. You leaned towards Sans, your voice quiet and collected.   
“Who are those idiots?” He shot them a glance, giving a small grunt.

“Human punks. It happens that some come here from time to time, try to stir up trouble. They are usually just talk and nothing else. Besides that, if they’d really try something in here, they’d have to be mad.”

“Aren’t you worried?”

“About what?”

“That they might hurt you? Or anyone else? How come that such behaviour is still tolerated!”

“Nope. They can try but they won’t manage. There are too many of us here. The police won’t do anything against it though, they aren’t very keen towards us monsters.”

“Morons.” You mumbled. Sans grabbed the ketchupbottle and straight up drank from it. “Sans nooo! That’s so gross and unsanitary! Other people want some too!” you complained and made a gaging sound.

“Eeeh, ‘s fine, he keeps this one specifically around for me.”

“It’s still gross!” Sans just shrugged as Grillby returned with your order. You smiled at him thankfully. As you took your first bite, you almost melted. Never in your life have you tasted something this good.

“I guess that means you like it?” The skeleton asked insecure and you gave out a tiny moan. “That’s a good noise, isn’t it?”

“Mhm…” you nodded, engulfed in absolute pure bliss. His laugh was a bit deeper now, obviously relived

“I’m glad you are enjoying it!”

“I should be mad at you! How could you keep this heavenly gift of god away from me?”

“Maybe I kept it for a moment like that?”

“Then you should have asked me out ages ago, how could I’ve ever survived without this?” You didn’t realise what you just said at first, only noticing when Chara started giggling and then instantly turning as red as your eyes. “I-I mean! Yeah! Uh! It’s good! And… Uh! It’s a nice date! Really nice! I enjoy myself a lot! I mean, not enjoy enjoy myself but… I’m having fun! Like a lot! This is nice! Really! We should do it more often! Like… Uhm! Not date, not if you don’t wanna, but you know… Hang out or something. I mean, like friends. Or not like friends, I don’t know, If you dn’t mind, I don’t but yeah, If you wanna stay like… You know what I mean? No you don’t. _I don’t_! I’m rambling, aren’t I? I am gonna stop now!” You could punch yourself in the face. Just square up, with a chair made out of stone with spikes on it. Ideally, on fire. Never in your life did you feel this embarrassed. Sans was obviously embarrassed by you too, clearly indicating by the colour spreading along his cheekbones. He was stroking the back of his skull and you jumped up from your chair. “I Uh! Need to go to the bathroom!” you stuttered and bolted away, your face burning.

“Geee, kid. You can’t say just things like that… Don’t you know what that does to me…?” he mumbled to himself, but you couldn’t hear it anymore. A little too confident for someone that’s never been in here before you stirred towards the bathroom at the very back of Grillby’s, but let’s be honest, this bar was the exact blueprint from the one down Underground. You just had to trust your memories. Well, not your memories but… the memories inside of your head. You remembered remembering these memories and that’s what made them your memories too. Confusing? Yes.

You scrunched up your face, as you realised, that you had to pass the humans in order to go to the bathroom. As expected, they started hollering at you. You rolled your eyes and tried your best to ignore them.

“Ay, yo momma, why don’t you ditch your weirdos and come sit with us. You’ll get the best seat in the house.” One of them said and patted his lap, making you almost gag. Not bothering to answer you just walked by when one of them grabbed your wrist. Startled, you stared down at the guy grabbing you a bit roughly.

“Didn’t you hear what my friend said? It isn’t polite to not answer a question and you look like such a nice lady, ain’t you, girlie?” You yanked your arm back, narrowing your eyes.

“Don’t touch me!” You hurried by them into the ladies, carefully closing the door behind you and putting both of your arms on the sink, breathing slowly. Your hands were shaking so much.

_Are you okay there?_

“Yeah? Why wouldn’t I be okay?” you mumbled to yourself. “I just completely embarrassed myself in front of my date-and I still think that this is kinda dumb even though I couldn’t be happier and don’t want this to be a onetime event-who still thinks of us as a homicidal maniac without even knowing it and just outside this door are like 6 drunk ass racist dudes, every one of them a head taller than me, that really want a piece of this sweet ass and ready to break out a fight, just by the looks of them. Oh and besides that, if anyone came in here now, they could spot me talking to myself in Wingdings like a complete lunatic. I am perfectly fine. Golly gosh darn goodness gumdrops, oh boy oh boy”

_Impressive, you’ve ascended to an entirely new level of sarcasm…_ You could feel ghostly hands brush across your cheeks in a kind and almost motherly fashion. If you concentrated enough, you could almost see the red eyes and the kind smile in front of you. _I wont let them hurt you. Or anyone else. Just so you know. And Sans won’t think of you was weird or that you embarrassed yourself, he’s already heads over heels for you. And he won’t find out. Ever._

What if he does? He’ll kill you. He’ll kill us _._

_I won’t let him._

A lot calmer now, you nodded and smiled at your mirror image. Chara had been right, your make up was still flawless, natural but accentuating your natural beauty, bringing out your freckles and making your red eyes sparkle like rubies. Your cheeks were still flushed, but lately, they always were. You didn’t mind though, you actually thought that it looked really cute and adorable. Feeling a lot more confident again, you walked back outside again, just to have your stomach drop when you came back to the main room. The six human guys had started to scream at some monsters, one of them threw a glass, just barely missing you as you exited the door.   
“Dafuq did I miss…” you whispered to yourself, every last fibre inside of you tense. They spotted you and you felt the colour drain from your face.

“Hey, bros, the little dollface is back! Let’s grab ‘er and leave this stinking rodent infested place.” The leader of the gang croaked and you backed off a bit, arms in front of you.

“You touch me and you lose the hand.” The words left you before you could even think about it. He narrowed his eyes, glaring at you. You could see Sans and a few other monsters getting up.

“You threatening me, bitch? What’cha gonna do?”

“I’m not gonna do anything. I’m just stating that-if you in fact-touch me, you _will_ lose that hand.” Your voice was surprisingly calm and collected, maybe because you knew exactly that what you said was true.

“She’s right, pals.” Sans said from across the room, the sockets of his eyes black and empty, never a good sign. “My friend here obviously doesn’t want to come with you, so you better leave now before you get yourself into more trouble.”

“Shuddup!” he shouted, slightly swaying from the alcohol. One of his friends grabbed his arm.

“Boss, let’s finish them off and leave okay?”

“Yeah right…” he mumbled and pulled a knife out of the waistband of his pants. “s not like anyone’s gonna punish us for dusting a few monsters.”

“And what about the girl? She’ll talk!”

“Not when we’re done with her.” A shiver went down your spine and you could hear both Sans and Chara growl, your eyebrows shooting up in surprise. This was probably one of the only occasions where they’d be able to work together.

“Hey, if I’d were you, I’d put away that knife and leave now laddie, or you’ll get seriously hurt!”

“I said shuddup, bitch!” he cried out. You just shrugged and you felt the air crack around you, as Sans teleported right next to you, one arm protectively around your shoulders.

“Listen here, pal. You are going to leave now. I will not allow you to harm anyone in here unless you want to fight me. And I can tell you, you won’t like what’s gonna happen next. I don’t like it when you threaten my friends. Y o u   d o n ‘ t  w a n n a   h a v e   a   b a d   t i m e ,  d o   y o u ?” The dude spat out towards the two of you, backing off slowly. You thought, that he must have realised, that threatening monsters in their territory must be a pretty stupid idea, especially when you were facing someone that could be as utterly scary and terrifying as Sans in bad time mode. Even Chara had respect of him when he was like that. No one would be dumb enough to-

Your arm acted on it’s own, grabbing Sans and pulling the two of you down before the human could finish grabbing the gun he still had hooked on the backside of his pants and pulling the trigger. A stinging hot pain hit your shoulder blade, as the bullet found its target. Well, that’s not quite true. You didn’t know who he was aiming at, you or Sans. But it didn’t matter, neither of you would have survived it, not a shot straight through the chest area. It would have killed him instantly, after all he only had one HP whilst you had a few more to spare. The bullet exited on the other side again, hitting the wall.

A sleek through-and-through as your Aunt liked to call them.

Sans and you crashed to the floor, you crying out in pain. Then three things happened at the same time.

Singeing hot pain sored through your body, five out of six humans got swallowed by the void thanks to Sans, the sixth human only avoiding it by diving out of the way as Chara sent his own knife flying at him, protectively cowering over you like a lioness would with their babies, growling just as much.

“What the fuck is that thing!” he screamed at you and Chara. They slowly got up, somewhat of a ghostly appearance but way more solid. And scarier. Way scarier.

“ _Greetings, Human. I am Chara.  The demon that comes when people call its name. It doesn't matter when. It doesn't matter where.”_

“Chara!” you hissed through gritted teeth, people were now staring at you as you got up, your shoulder bleeding badly. The human used the moment of distraction to scramble up and run for his life. Guess he won’t try to pick a fight with monsters any time soon again. Chara however was immediately with you again, carefully inspecting your wound.

_“He hurt you!”_

“Yeah, no shit!”

_“I wasn’t fast enough to…”_

“Elaine…” Both of you turned your head to Sans, still on the floor and staring at you in a state of complete and utter shock. Your heart dropped immediately. “What is that… _thing_ … doing here with you?” The amount of disgust in his voice caused you some actual, physical pain.

“ _Shit_.” Couldn’t have said that better, Chara.

And then you did the only thing you could in such a situation.

You ran.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything. Everything went wrong.


	21. Determination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PLOT!  
> SPICED WITH PLOT!  
> AND A SIDE-DISH OF PLOT!  
> AND PLOT-PIE AS DESERT!  
> AND WE HAVE PLOT-WINE TOO!  
> WE ARE FANCY AND CIVILISED AFTER ALL! 
> 
> Also, the first person to find out the one very subtle hint whats REALY going on with Elaines soul, gets a cookie!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *hint hint* someone send me some happy and cute chara shit to motivate me pls. I promise that things will come faster too *hint hint*

When Sans teleported into Undyne’s living room, he was a complete mess. Your blood was splattered on his shirt, where it hit him when you got shot through the shoulder, his eyesockets switching between being empty holes and his left eye flaring up. He was twitching and not quite stable, knocking over the coffee table by accident. He saw his brother, he was safe, was alive. That was the most important thing. They-she-didn’t get to him yet. The betrayal went so deep, it actually hurt him, more than any physical attack could ever hurt. People were around him, everyone was here, but he couldn’t hear what they were saying. As if in a desperate trance, he grabbed Papyrus arm, needing prove that he wasn’t too late this time.

“BROTHER? WHAT HAPPENED? IS THAT BLOOD? WHERE IS THE HUMAN?”

“I… We were at Grillby’s… She got shot… And Chara, Chara was there…” he mumbled, tumbling again, desperately needing to sit down on the floor.

“Wait what?” Undyne bellowed. “What do you mean, Elaine got shot? _Did you leave them?_ And Chara… Sans, Chara’s been dead for ages. It’s impossible!” Next to her, Frisk started writhing as if in agony.

“I… I don’t know… Chara… The goddamn wrench. They either took Elaine with them or…”

“or what?” He stared at Undyne, pure hatred on his face. He could feel something break inside of him.

“I think they _are_ Chara.”

 

Ghostly hands were holding you upright as you leaned against the doorframe, your head lolling down to your chest, your breath was going so hard.

 _“Come on, we are almost there!”_ Chara cried out, despair and fear in their voice. You could only nod and stumbled further, slamming the door behind you, the keys gliding through your fingers, slippery from the blood. You haven’t been here ever since the accident. There should be a thick layer of dust everywhere but there wasn’t, actually. Everything looked just like it did when you’ve left, so many years ago. The keys to your old home still worked, what surprised you, but even if they would not, Chara would have found a way inside. You didn’t know why you came here, it was the first thing that came to your mind.

Your abandoned childhood house.

Your knees buckled again, just before you could reach the bathroom and you stumbled, barely managing to stay up.

_“Elaine, please, stay with me. Just a few more steps and we can bandage you up.”_

“Doesn’t matter…” you mumbled. “He’ll find us… We’re dead…” You couldn’t see straight anymore but you needed to walk, Chara kept pushing you, until you got where you needed to be, scavenging the bathroom cupboard for all kinds of medical equipment. Just as you grabbed the last pair of bandages, your visual field blacked out completely. You didn’t feel it, when you hit the floor, all you heard were Charas desperate cries of terror, sobbing for you to stay awake.

 

“What do you mean, they _are_ Chara, Sans?!” Undyne yelped. He was breathing hard, trying so badly to fight down the rage and hatred inside of him.

“You’ve heard me. Elaine… I don’t know… Hell, they even _look_ like the goddamn hellspawn. It doesn’t make any _sense_. But I know what I _saw_ , I know what I _heard_!” He slammed his fist against the floor. “Goddamn it! I need to go look for them!”

“Why?!” He looked Undyne straigt into the face.

“To end it, once and for all!” Disbelief came across their face, the red brows furrowed so much, they almost touched.

“You are not going to hurt them!”

“Undyne, Chara is dangerous!”

“I won’t let you! They are just a human, what you are saying doesn’t make sense!”

“Do you want another genocide?”

“What are you talking about? _What genocide_?”

“Sans.” Toriels voice behind him snapped him out of his argument with the head of the royal guard and he stared at her. There was something in here face, something he had seen once before today.

The look of a mother, protecting their cub.

“Even if Chara was there.” Her voice was hard and cold, so unusual of the goat monster but it showed off her royal aura. “Do you really think I would allow you to hunt down my child?”

“Tori, they…”

“Not another word from you! You are not going on a witch hunt!”

“Does anyone understand what that… demon… did before?” Frisk was holding their head, quietly whimpering.

“No and I don’t care what you say. If you are going, you are taking all of us with you.”

“Yeah Sans… You can’t just kill them like that. There might be a reason for this!”

“And then? Are you going to try to reason with them? They can’t feel remorse. _All they care about is killing_!”

 

When you woke up the next time, your throat felt unbelievably dry. Moaning in pain, you sat up, careful to not move your shoulder, even though it hurt much less now. You found yourself in the middle of the dining room, on the floor. Warm hands that were not quite there, helped you up and you turned your head to look into Charas face, pale and full of worry. Were those tearstains on their face?

“What happened?”

“ _You blacked out. I… I had to possess our body for a while, I am so sorry! You wouldn’t stop bleeding and I had to do something! I cleaned everything and tried to stitch it together but it’s not as pretty as it could be. You’d need to see mom in order to get it properly healed, or go to a hospital, but they would ask questions. And… I don’t think we can go back to Mom and Frisk and the others… Sans probably told them.. about me. Oh god I am so sorry about what happened! I never meant for you to get hurt or for any of this to happen_.”

“Hey, it’s alright. We knew that this would happen. We planned for this!”

_“I am still sorry… We can’t stay here for much longer, we need to keep moving. Sans can still sense your soul, there is still a piece of his in there. And if he catches us… There won’t be a fight. You can’t even hold a weapon right now!”_

“I know but… I am so tired, Chara. I can’t move. Please, just let me sleep.” You begged, almost crying now.

 _“No no no, stay with me, flower!”_ You could feel the patting your cheeks to keep you awake, almost slapping you. Tears were glistening in their eyes again. _“Oh golly, no, please no, stay awake, you can’t sleep now, you won’t wake up again. Oh please, wake up, don’t die, please, I can’t… Stay with me!”_

You heard another crash and another pat across your face.

_“Stay here, okay! I won’t let anyone touch you or hurt you ever again. You hear me?”_

He despised the fact, that others insisted on joining him, hunting down the demon, but they just wouldn’t let go of it. Everyone had their own agenda in this, they just couldn’t see the pure evil inside of that wretched abomination, none of the remembered the previous timelines. Only he did, he and the kid, still whimpering. He saw that as a sign that he was right. His soul gave an excited twitch, when he stepped through the shortcut, everyone following him. He felt disgusted by himself, being still bonded to that… thing… If he could, he’d just rip that part out of his soul and leave it behind forever.

The only good thing that came out of that was that he could still sense the human, he was now chasing after.

He’d never seen this place before. The grand mansion felt empty and hallow, as if it had laid for ages, abandoned and left there to rot.

How fitting.

Blood was on the floor, the droplets staining the white marble, smeared by footprints. Undyne crouched down and inspected it.

“It’s still fresh, if Elaine was here she can’t be far…”

“Oh dear…. So much blood…” Toriel whispered, holding Frisk a tad tighter, the child was hiding their face at the crook of their neck, still shaking.

“Great, the demon is here, can we please move on, before we get all slaughtered?”

“I want to see anyone try to kill some of the strongest monsters while being at the brink of death themselves. Sans there is so much blood, I don’t even know if there will be something left for you to rip into shreds.” Undyne hissed at him. Papyrus didn’t look at him, he’s been awfully quiet this entire time. “If you are wrong, and Elaine died because she bled out I can promise you…” You could hear mumbling from one of the rooms, Sans pushing everyone behind him in a protective manner. It was quiet for some cruel long seconds and then suddenly… A melody?

Someone was humming a song. Toriel took in a shaky breath, as if she recognised it. He ignored the others and proceeded, the blue aura around his hand, eye flared up.

Chara was sitting in the middle of the room.

They didn’t wear a shirt anymore, instead they had bandages wrapped around their torso in a sloppy manner, the white fabric and their bra were covered in blood, the white skin shining abnormally pale against the red. They had turned their back to him, head lowered, still humming their song. He recognised it; it was the one from the music box at the statue in waterfall. 

 _“I knew, you’d come.”_ They suddenly said. Their voice was different than Elaine’s. What even was real about them? _“I wish I had more time to get her away from you.”_

“Running won’t help you now.”

 _“I am not running. She can’t. I’m glad I can keep her_ alive.”

“Is she still in there? Or did you possess her completely by now?”  Sans hissed and Chara chucked sadly. When they turned their head, tears were rolling down their cheeks.

_“You still don’t get it… There is no Elaine, and there is no Chara. There is just…. Us.”_

“My child…” Toriel whispered with glossy eyes. Red irises looked upon them.

“ _Mom. They are dying.”_ Was all they managed to say, before they cramped up again. When they looked up, something has changed. The look in their eyes was different. “When did you come here…?” you mumbled, shaking your head in confusion. A ghostly figure appeared behind your back, Chara helping you sit straight again, mumbling something. You tried to crawl back, but couldn’t get far due to the immense pain in your shoulder. “We need to get away…” your voice sounded so weak, so fragile.

_“We can’t. You are unable to walk yet. You need to gather your strength! And they need to understand…”_

“Yeah, understanding would be pretty nice…” Undyne mumbled to herself. You looked up to her, trying your best to get up, but it was just too much.

“Undyne, I am so sorry…” you didn’t manage to finish your sentence, the world faded back to black once again, this time you weren’t falling though, Chara immediately took over, whining in agony.

“Stop possessing her!” Sans hissed and the demon glared at him.

 _“I am what keeps her alive right now, you stupid comedian! The only reason, her heart keeps beating is me keeping it that way!”_ They almost spat at him. “ _They have nothing to fear from me, unlike from you. If the other monsters weren’t with you, you wouldn’t even waist a second before striking!”_ There was so much malice in Chara’s voice, they almost spat their words at him like venom before turning their back at the pulk again, arms wrapped around the pale torso, mumbling to themselves. _“Come on, wake up please…  You can’t just leave me now, flower…”_

“How can you still be alive?” Toriel whispered all of a sudden, her voice hoarse and quiet. “I saw you die, I buried you” For a while, the human didn’t stir, before answering, the voice echoing within itself.

_“I am not, Mom. Im neither human nor ghost or anything in between, I am…”_

“A demon…” Sans finished their sentence dryly for them. Chara gave another heavy shudder, their breath speeding up again.

“They are not a demon, Sans!” You panted, the accusation bringing you back to your senses. You doubled over in pain, involuntarily letting out a wail of anguish.

“Oh, what the hell…” Undiny hissed and hurried over to you, putting her hand on your back. She could feel how cold your skin was, after all you only wore a bra right now, since Chara needed to get to your shoulder wound somehow. Without another word, she slipped out of her jacket and put it around your shoulders. “Come on, you are dying here, let us help you. And ignore Sans, no idea what has gotten into him, keeps talking about this genocide thing and stuff but I don’t know what that’s about. We need to fix you and then you have some explaining to do, young lady. Like why the ghost of the Queens child is stuck here with you…” You managed to force the tiniest smile out of yourself.

“’m fine, Undyne really… And I am sorry to say it but he has every right to be angry” Steelcold eyes were now staring at him. “If you want to blame someone, blame me but leave Chara out of this.”

“Oh, so I can blame you for all of the evil things they have done too?” he hissed and you just glared.

“They aren’t evil, Sans. If you would just listen!”

“You haven’t been there, you don’t know what they have done, _you don’t remember! I do!_ ” he snapped and you suddenly went completely quiet, almost cold, now looking back upfront.

“Sans, that’s enough!” Toriel intervened but he was already buzzing with rage, his eye now flared up, hands opening and closing over and over again. “We can discuss this later, when the human isn’t….”

“So, i've got a question for ya. Do you think even the worst person can change. . . ? That everybody can be a good person, if they just try? Heh heh heh he. . . All right. Well here's a better question. Do you wanna have a bad time? 'Cause if you take another step forward. . . You are REALLY not going to like what happens next. Welp. Sorry, old lady. This is why i never make promises.” You suddenly whispered, your voice both cheery and cold at the same time. “It’s a beautiful day outside. Birds are singing, flowers are blooming. . . On days like these, kids like you. . . Should be burning in hell.”

“What are you talking about?” Undyne mumbled, confusion clouding her face. You could hear Frisk whimper, a shower running down Sans spine. “Sans, what is she talking about!” the fish demanded, but according to the expression in her face, she already knew the answer.

“Listen. I know you didn't answer me before, but. . . Somewhere in there. I can feel it. There's a glimmer of a good person inside of you. The memory of someone who once wanted to do the right thing. Someone who, in another time, might have even been. . . A friend? C'mon, buddy. Do you remember me? Please, if you're listening. . . Let's forget all this, ok?  Just lay down your weapon, and . . .”

 _“Elaine, that’s enough!”_ Chara suddenly hissed at you, putting their hands at your cheeks. They felt warmer than usual, but you were so cold. Cold and tired _. “We talked about this. Don’t try thinking about it, it will just get you in a bad place again. You are weakened enough! I can only do so much.”_

“I’m sorry, Chara…. But maybe if he’d understand…” You started sobbing, you were so tired, you just wanted to sleep without having to fear never to wake up again or worse-to wake up completely alone this time.

_“It doesn’t matter anymore.”_

“But…”

“You remember…” Sans whispered and you just nodded, closing your eyes.

“Yes. Yes, I remember everything. All of them, every line, every death, everything that happened.”

“Since when?”

“ _Sans…”_

“Since when!” he demanded again. Chara wrapped their arms around you in a protective manner, glaring at him.

 _“It started when we first met you lot!”_ they spat at him. “ _I’ve been inactive ever since we got tied together, just quietly watching. After we ran into you, it was like waking up from a long slumber again. That night, I got active for the first time…”_

“YOU MEAN THE NIGHT THE TINY HUMAN FOUGHT AGAINST THAT AWFUL MAN AND CAME TO US?” It was the first thing Papyrus had said ever since he had put a step into the house.

 _“Yes, that was me. I couldn’t see her getting hurt anymore. I was also the one that brought her to your step. I know you Sans, and I might not like you-not one bit-but I know you and I know how strong you actually are. So I brought her to the only guys who could protect her from a real monster. After that… it’s gotten stronger every day. It started out as a whisper, that soon became conversations. She started to make some connections to the previous runs and timelines, probably unknowingly. After the fight with you things changed again.”_ Chara blew air out through their nose, still hugging you close _. “I was completely active now, basically like this if her soul was drawn out, constantly awake. We would keep each other safe. And after she woke up from the ki…. Fight._ Fight _. She suddenly remembered, as if we shared memories. You aren’t the only one she was bonded too, Sans, just in a different way.”_

 _“_ That’s really nice but… how did you end up together like this anyways?” Undyne asked, now sitting on the floor, her eyes glued to the ghostly, semi-transparent face.

_“Uuuh…. We’ve met in the void actually.”_

“You what?”

 _“I was there because well… after uhm… the barrier broke..”_ they glanced at Frisk, obviously not wanting to reveal that they had once been like this as well. _“Elaine was there because she was in a coma. Actually, she shouldn’t have been there but the amount of determination she had inside of herself kept her somewhat alive. Whilst her body remained here, her being was stuck in the void. We were two broken, half souls stuck in the never-ending white of the void. We only had each other. It… it took us quite some time until we realised but, we had an idea how to escape. You need a human and a monster soul to cross the barrier, so why not try to cross the barrier of the void as well? I mean, I was basically a monster, especially after everything I’ve done. It took me a while to snap out of that and become myself again, instead of-what did you call it, Sans?-a homicidal maniac? So we tried, but.. something went wrong.”_ Sadness flickered across Charas face _. “Our theory actually proved itself wrong. Elaine’s soul broke, as soon as we left.”_

“Then… how is she still alive?” Undyne’s one glowing eye narrowed and a sad smile stretched across the ghostly face.

“ _Well, that’s where I come into play. I keep her soul together, constantly wrapping it up, like duct tape, holding the fragments in place. I can’t survive without her but now, she can’t without me either. We need each other and we keep each other safe._ ”

“Oh, that means all we have to do is finding a way to mend the broken soul and then we can get rid of you?”

“Sans!” Toriel hissed and you turned at him, disbelief plastered onto your face.

“Excuse me, but what?”

“This needs closure, once and for all. And I will not stand by and watch everything fall apart once again” Laughter erupted from you as you very calmly and very slowly started to get up again, something menacing in your posture, your head low and eyes closed. Chara was saying your name in an alerting tone.

“And what exactly makes you think that I want to get rid of Chara?” your head snapped up, eyes wide open and hard as steel.

“They are dangerous, Elaine, can’t you see?” Sans hissed back at you, stepping closer. “They are a killer!” A smile appeared on your face and you leaned in, your voice dropping.

“So are you.” He flinched, as if you’d hit him, but you kept smiling. “So is Undyne. Or Asgore. I know what you did, I know how many humans had to die before the barrier broke. They are still dead but you guys are alive. I am still not judging you. And I am not “getting rid of them", Sans.” The skeleton just stared at you in shock, unable to come up with a retort as your voice was rising. “I am going to protect Chara, with my life if I have to. I am not giving up on them, never. They saved my life too many times and they’ve been with me through so much. I’ve lost one sibling already, I am not going to let it happen again. You think that I am just some tiny, fragile, stupid human that just happened to get stuck with a very powerful being but I can tell you, you have nothing to fear from Chara. I am the one you need to be afraid of, if you want to hurt them, you have to get through me first. And I won’t lose. I am _determined_ to keep them save. If you make me chose between you and them, you won’t win this. You can’t. I will make it my job to keep them as far away from you as possible.” You were breathing heart, screaming your words at him, your chest suddenly hot and your shoulder tingling, suddenly not hurting anymore. “You can’t win against this kind of determination, Sans! I am never giving up, I won’t let anyone down or die again. I am fighting with everything I have. They are not dangerous and they are not threatening you. Think for a second, If either of us would wanted you dead, you would be. But you aren’t. None of you. I did the best to protect all of you but not now. If you are trying to get rid of them, you might just as well get rid of me, because I won’t lose the most important person to me. I’d rather be dead. I’d rather be back stuck in the void. I’d rather go back to Hugh!” Suddenly, Chara was between you, facing you and arms spread out.

 _“Elaine, stop!”_ Something in-between fear and confusion on their face.   _“Your soul… It’s…”_ You glanced down and instantly furrowed your brows. That explained the heat in your chest.

“Oh, that certainly is new…” you mewled surprised. You could see your soul glow, strong enough to enlighten your whole ribcage. You could see it beating strongly, your ribs and sternum casting dark shadows inside.

“That’s determination…”  Undyne whispered enticed, getting up and poking your side. “I’ve never seen a soul with this much before except for the kid. And never like that… Well, maybe once, but it’s… it’s all blurry.” Your shoulder didn’t hurt as much anymore, and you suddenly remembered something from a different set of memories.

 _You are filled with determination_.

Until you heard the footsteps outside the room, echoing from the marble floor, here and there a squelching sound as they stepped into a puddle of blood. Following an instinct, you twirled around, standing protectively in front of the monsters and Frisk-yes, even Sans.

“Who is there?” A shiver went down your spine as you heard the familiar voice, you haven’t heard in a while. “I know someone is here, this place has an alarm system! And I am armed!” A middle aged woman entered the room, grey streaks were running through her brown hair. She was dressed in a navy pinstripe suit and she was holding a gun in both hands, scouting the room way too professionally. Your stomach dropped at the sight and she narrowed her eyes. “That’s impossible…” You still had your arms outstretched.

“Auntie Hel?” you whispered before you were suddenly pulled into a tight hug.

“Elaine Asra Winters, where the hell have you been?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when will the suffering end? 
> 
> Never.


	22. Sleep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> having kind of a sad day today, so sorry if it's not up to standards ;___;

Gunpowder and cookie dough.

Auntie Hel still smelled like gunpowder and cookie dough. You could almost see it before you, baking sugar cookies with her when mom and dad where busy again. She’d always smell like gunpowder and cookie dough. She’s always been kind to you, smiling a warm smile or hugging you close, chin nestled on your head. While she was working, she liked to wear those serious pantsuits or tight costumes, her hair always in a tight bun or tied out of her face, her heels would click on the floor, even the carpet, though that shouldn’t be possible. But once she was hidden under the blanket of safety between her own four walls-or yours, as a matter of fact-she’d let her hair down, grey streaks running through the mousebrown hair and wear dresses that reminded you of those housewives on the TV. Sometimes, when she was cooking, she’d even wear an apron or the huge, baby pink checked oven-mitts. And she always smelled of gunpowder and cookie dough. The smell always comforted you, sent you back in time to better days. It was such an odd combination, when you first smelled it, you had turned up your nose, despising the spicy scent of the gunpowder and the heavy sweetness of the cookie dough. But you had learned to love it, it had grown on you, forever linked to the memory of your oh so beloved auntie. And even now, after 5 years, it still worked, even though you haven’t smelled anything like that in ages.

Gunpowder and cookie dough.

You couldn’t help but nestle closer into the warm and soft hug. It would always be comforting to you, no matter how spine-crushingly tight it was, it would comfort you. You’ve always been very close to your Aunt but after the accident, you haven’t seen her a single time, it had broken your heart and you wanted to hate her. Hate her for abandoning you when you needed her the most, just after you’d lost your parents and sister and woke up from a coma. If she’d been there, you would have never decided to stay with Hugh, in order to save your mother-her sister-you would not have been stuck with a monster, a true monster, for almost four years. But she wasn’t, so you had to do something. Oh, the many times you would wake up in the following year, crying out for her and hoping to catch a whiff of Gunpowder and Cookie dough.

But nobody came.

So you grew cold and distant, fighting on your own. No, not on your own. You still had Chara. And you were so thankful for that. Without them, you would have been dead. Not because it was them, holding your soul together but rather because you would have been driven mad, insane. But they kept you alive and sane. Safe.

And yet, as soon as the scent of Gunpowder and Cookie dough hit your nose, you melted into the touch, transformed back into the sweet five year old, crying out for their mother, only to have their Auntie pick them up, because Momma and Dada were gone on a business trip again. You could feel the tears build up, already on the verge of spilling over. You were tired of fighting, were tired of being strong. You just wanted your parents back, you just wanted you sister back, all you wanted to do was cry in your Aunts arms and let her do all the work, protect a child that was forced to grow up too fast, robbed of her childhood.

A second before you were about to break, she pulled away, her arm on sour shoulders, looking at you at arms-length. A smile brought up the wrinkles in her face, that made her look exceptionally cute and tears were glistening in her eyes. She reminded you of Toriel a bit.

“Look at you, honey! You’ve grown so much! Well, not physically, but you’ve transformed into such a beautiful young lady now!” She showed off her dimples when she smiled, and said smile didn’t even falter, when she spotted the blood covering you, gauzes around our torso and only dressed in a stained bra and Undynes jacket. “Oh my, is that blood on you? Have you been shot?”

“Uuuuuuh, yeah. I… got into a bar fight.” She sighed, slowly shaking her head.

“Oh dear, you are just like your mother. Are you well? Does the git who did this look at least twice as bad? Do I have to send in the boys?” She had a thick irish accent, even thicker than yours in your prime time. She was such an irish woman, even her hair used to be gingery red at some point, before age turned it mousy.

“I am sure they are alright…” A thought crossed your mind and you turned your head towards Sans, who was still scowling, your eyebrows furrowed. “That makes me think, where _are_ they exactly?”

“Oh, ya know… Over here…” he shrugged, hesitating for a second. “And over there. And up there.”

“Sans!” You hissed, narrowing your eyes.

“They are unharmed, just don’t know where they are. Why don’t you ask your demon?”

 _“I don’t know everything!”_ Chara hissed and Sans was glaring.

“Tough, coming from such a know-it-al!”

“Why is there a ghost floating in the middle of the room that looks just like you, Elaine?” Auntie Hel murmured and you sucked in your breath sharply. “And why are you and your…. Friends? Here anyways? Have you started hanging with monsters?”

“Got a problem with that, human?” Undyne crossed her arms, towering threating. Your Aunt remained calm, straightening the Lapel of her suiting.

“Not at all. My right hand is a monster, I’ve never had a better partner.” Her voice was suddenly sharp and cold, now directed back to you. “I just thought, that your boyfriend would not be delighted by the thought of mingling with them. He seemed quite the racist gobshite wanker!”

“Auntie Hel, there are children here!” you hissed and she made a dismissive gesture.

“Eh, they won’t understand what I just said, but let’s be honest you deserve better than that Eejit.”

“I like her…” Undyne muttered and you glared at her, making a “I’m-watching-you”-gesture towards her.

“Don’t worry, Auntie, he has no say in this. I actually ditched him fer a wee minute already” talking to her seemed infectous, you already felt yourself starting to slip back into your original accent. Suddenly, she grabbed your good arm.

“Whadda’ya mean, ya ditched him, laddie?”

“What I just said. He tried to hurt me and I just busted out of that place. I’ve been staying with ye monsters ever since that.” You glanced at the others quickly. “They are me friends, they are really nice. And I came here tonight after I been shot through the shoulder to patch up n everything. Ya alright, ya look pale round the nosey?”

“I might need a stool…” she admitted and you guided her over to the dinner table. “Can you please tell me everything, buttercup? And I promise I will do so too.”

“I don’ wanna be rude and interrupt your happy family gathering here, but we are kinda in the middle of something?” The shorter skeleton intervened but you just swatted at the general direction.

“Ssssht, yar plonker.” You hissed and he growled but you just ignored him. “Huys, this is my Aunt, Helvetica Sullivan. Auntie Hel, these are my friends. The queen, Toriel, should be familiar to you, just as her child Frisk, the human ambassador for monsters. Next to her is Undyne, the best quare half battleaxe you’ll ever meet-“

“What did you call me?”

“and next to _her_ is Papyrus, who has been suspiciously quiet this entire time, something I didn’t deem possible. The ghost who looks like me is Chara and… And that’s a long story. The other skelly right here ‘s Sans, he currently wants to kill me thanks to the oddly familiar ghost and because he thinks me some jabbering twat that killed everyone before but he won’t do it, because I will hand him his own arse if he’ll try to.” You sent daggers flying at him and just got the same response back, additionally with a growl. “So yeah, I bolted out of Hughs grasp about half a year ago by now. ‘s been quite some time now that I get to think about it. He tried a couple of time to get me back-hell knows why-but he couldn’t. So yeah, nothing special. How’s your life been, ya know, these past 5 years.” Your tone became just slightly passive aggressive and your Aunt hid her face in her hands.

“Did he hurt you?” She just pressed through her teeth.

“What? Who? Sans? No he…”

“Hugh!” She hissed and you snapped your jaw shut with a loud noise. “Did that… Did he hurt you?” You hesitated for a moment too long, before you shook your head, saying “no” in a very soft voice. Chara huffed, crossing her arms.

_“Yes because there are no words to begin to describe his…”_

“Chara! Will you shuddup!” You hissed and they furrowed their brow, when they saw your facial expression.

“That bastard…” You aunt whispered, slightly shaking, her hands now curled into fists. “He swore….”

“He swore what…” Your voice might have been a tad too sharp as you got up slowly, chin raised.

“You need to understand, buttercup.” She tried to explain, but you were shaking your head vigorously.

“Understand what?”

“I tried to get to you, immediately after you woke up, but he didn’t let me, said you were with him. I threatened him to cut off his… ballend, if he even dared to touch you. So he offered me a bargain, your safety for some… favours of mine. I hated doing it, but if it meant your security, I’d do it. So I did what he asked me too, kept the police away, did his dirtywork while paying the bills for ya mam and me sister, until she died suddenly, so he wouldn’t harm ya. I feared, if we take him out, you’d be dead too. Elaine, you need to understand that…” You didn’t listen to her anymore, instead you whipped around, staring at Chara-both of your faces lighting up in understandment.

_“He blackmailed her!”_

“That’s what he needed me for!”

_“That’s why he still tries so hard to get you back, even though he hates you!”_

“So Auntie Hel can do all sorts of stuff for him! But now that she knows we are gone…”

_“He can’t do jack shite about it!”_

“But…”

_“But we can!”_

“We can finally end it!”

 _“He_ did _kill your mother.”_

“After he life to me! For years! He never paid a cent for mom’s bills, he let her do everything!”

_“And kept you as a leverage.”_

“Bloody hell!” Excitement swept through you as you stared at each other.

“Uhm, excuse me, but…. What kind of “dirtywork” are we talking about here?” Toriel seemed vary, after all, your Aunts job was quite sketchy.

“Well you see, she’s actually a donna…”

“A what?” Your aunt got up and put a hand on your shoulder, a smile on her face.

“I am the head of Ebbot citys Mafia. Nice to meetcha, your highness. Always nice to meet another queen!” Then her eye shifted to Sans. “So, you are the dude that tries to kill my niece? Good luck to you, I highly doubt, you’ll make it. You’d have more luck killing a ghost”   
“Welllll, that’s kinda his plan…” Chara murmured and made a face. Then, suddenly Auntie Hel furrowed her brow, glances shooting between Sans and Papyrus. “Wait a second…. Are they named after fonds, Elaine?” You simply shrugged and she huffed. “What kind of parent would name their child after a _fond_!? What must a child have done to deserve that?”

“I don’t know, why don’t you ask grandma?”

“Don’t get cocky with me now, laddie!”

 

It took another hour until your aunt left the house, not until you’ve assured them, that you would call them as soon as you’d be back to full health and not get yourself into more trouble. That promise held itself upright for exactly 0.45 seconds after she had left, before you stormed off outside, leaving the monsters behind. You were still fuelled by rage and determination, stomping through the cold night, snow falling from the sky. You were still wearing nothing but our bra and Undyne’s jackets as well as some bandages, so you quickly closed the zip in the front up to your chin, more so that the bloodstains would be hidden than keep you warm. You didn’t feel the cold at all, as well as the pain. Adrenaline and Determination were doing its thing but once these would have worn off, you’d probably feel like an Uruk-hai just chewed on you and spat you out again.   
It would take your monsterfriends at least 3 minutes until they’d realise that you’d run off but you’d be dusted away by then anyways, hopefully unable to be found.

_Where are we going? Sans can find us. He still senses your soul._

Chara had resorted to settle down inside you again, being somewhat solid and actually there was so much work and they had a rough night as well. It just couldn’t get any worse now.

I don’t know, you answered truthfully, but away, I guess. Keep moving, on the run. If… If there’s a chance, we need to go home to Sa-Papyrus and grab the bag. It will make things easier. Then we stay in motion, try to plan.

_Patience is key. We need to find a way to get you to safety; your aunt should provide herself useful for that now._

You were running now, the three minutes were up. You started to curse, as you noticed your footprints in the snow. You came to a slithering halt and backtracked a few streets before you tuned left and then right again. A bug iron gate between stone brick walls, that was covered in snow caught your attention and you ran towards it, entering the oddly familiar park for the second time tonight. Only that this time, you came from the other side. You were careful to go around the lake, the ice was still not very trustworthy and thin, but now that the now has covered everything, you wouldn’t be surprised if some poor soul would step on it and make it break. It was just bound to happen.   
Head low, your breath coming out in little puffs, you started running again, towards the exit. The monsters would be looking for you, so now was your best and probably only chance to get The Bag.

Suddenly, you were yanked back by a surprisingly cold, skeletal hand around your wrist. You have a yelp which turned into a pained moan, and you turned on the spot, your shoes slipping in the snow.

“Now, where are you thinking that you two are going?” Sans hissed at you and you tried to break free. Surprisingly, he actually let go of you.

“As far away from you as possible, obviously!” you snapped, your soul still stinging at the words but you didn’t care. If you had to choose between your own desires and Sans feelings or Charas safety, you didn’t even need to think about it. Stupid, senseless-heh, Sansless-question.

“And you really think I’d just let you off this quickly? Are you this blunt or just naïve?”

“No, I am neither, thank you very much. Oh, and just in case you haven’t noticed, I am running _from_ you, so you can stop being afraid that I’ll slay all of your hopes and dreams. And if I have to cross the entire country, I have to.” Tears were building up in your eyes, ready to spill over. It hurt, it hurt so much. “I will take Chara as far away from you as possible, so no one can hurt them ever again. Not you, not Hugh, not some weird as humans.” You were screaming on top of your lungs again now.

Crunching indicated that other people were arriving as well and you could see a flash of blue staggering towards you, steaming with anger.

“Elaine-whatever the fuck your aunt said, I don’t know-Asterroshe Asran Winters, you absolute dimwit, can you stop running away please!” She huffed and puffed, clearly aggravated. “Especially when you are dragging a clearly visible trail of blood and foodsteps behind you!” Wait, what?

Shocked, you turned to look at the grown and really, here and there were red speckles in the white snow, as bright as beacons and you were swearing again. How didn’t you notice? Did you go numb due to the cold already?

Of course you have, it was freezing and you were basically running around half naked and loosing blood. You saw Papyrus and Frisk enter the Park as well, Toriel relatively far behind them. A shower went down your spine, that surely wasn’t from the cold just as Undyne reached you.

“You…. Absolute….fucking….. walnut… Elaine… Asterix…. Winters!” You didn’t pay attention to her at all, your head was still turned to Frisk, running towards you, taking the shortest route possible, unlike you and Undyne, who had clearly followed your steps for a reason.

 _The ice…_ Chara whispered and your body jolted forward, breaking into a sprint. You had no control but you didn’t need to, you would have reacted just the same. Sans behind you was growling-after all a serious murderchild was running towards his brother and monsterambassador at full speed. You could hear the ice crack beneath you, as you picked up frisk, not even breaking your rhythm or loosing too much momentum.

“Imma get her, if she…”

“Sans no! Look at the ice!” Undyne must have held him back from just blasting you into oblivion with his blaster or some shit, you were still running.

“HU….MAN?” Papyrus questioned, not noticing, that he was about to drown. You crashed into him, basically pushing Frisk into his arms, that were instantly wrapped around the child and shoving him with as much force you still had left in you. It sent both of you tumbling, falling to the ground. The skeleton slithered away from you, towards the edge of the frozen pond, hopefully far enough, and you tried to roll and come up again, continuing to run, when you slipped on the ice, your chin crashing against the solid water. You could taste blood-probably bitten yourself-and there was a ringing in your ears. Everything felt fuzzy, like the world was wrapped into cotton. You could hear screams, that were probably close-by but felt so distant. What were they saying, you couldn’t tell, you couldn’t understand. Your head hurt so much. Why were you here again? Oh yeah, the kid and…. The cracking of ice was the only sound that came through to you, and you tried to gather enough strength to get up, you needed to get up but couldn’t say why. Just that it was important to get up and run. Why was that so important, that Chara was screaming at you when you couldn’t hear them? Sans had already found you, why couldn’t he aga-

And then the ice underneath broke and the icy water stung like thousand needles, filling your lungs. You tried to fight it, tried to get back up but there was just more ice above you, as you helplessly drifted along. The pounding of your fists was too weak, too slow under water to break it and there were no pockets of air.

But why were you struggling at all? You were so tired and everything hurt, your insides were on fire. You just wanted to sleep, just wanted to rest.

The most important thing was, that Papyrus and Frisk would be secure. Oh god, you hoped that they were alright.

When a blue amphibian hand grabbed you, breaking through the ice and dragging you back to dry land, you weren’t conscious anymore. You couldn’t hear the screaming voices, the sobbing and accusations flying around. You were so tired. Someone was shaking you, pressing against your chest and trying to get the water out of your lungs. You just wanted to sleep. Your body reacted and vomited water and blood, taking in a rattling wheeze but your mind wasn’t there anymore. Don’t you deserve a rest? You just wanted to rest. You didn’t stir anymore after that. You wanted to sleep.

Your determination was flickering.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol. 
> 
> Wouldn't it just totally SUCK if she died right here, right then? ahahahaha 
> 
> But that would be boring, isn't it?   
> Where is the fun in that?   
> So don't worry.   
> There is more suffering to come along


	23. Elaine Asra Winters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'll try to be a bit kinder to my baby for a moment.  
> But just a bit.  
> She deserves it. She just died after all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there are any mistakes, I'm sorry, Momma's a tad hungover

Your skin was so cold, still. Your body looked so small and fragile in the bed, covered in blankets. Hours have passed by now but you still haven’t woken up, didn’t move an inch. Even your breathing was shallow and flat. The reddish brown hair surrounded your head in a messy halo. Chara was sitting on the edge of the mattress, tearstains still on their rosy cheeks. They haven’t said a single thing ever since Alphys had left. The doctor reassured them that there wouldn’t be any lasting damages on you, you just needed to rest. You were lucky, being saved so quickly.  
A strand of hair fell into your face, slightly moving when it was caught in your breath. Gently, a sad smile on their face, Chara brushed it away, their hand lingering on your cheek.

Sans couldn’t understand. He hated you-both of you-Chara was an evil demon and you were protecting them from him, when all he wanted to do is save his friends and family. You shouldn’t care about any of them and yet, you still almost died, saving Frisk and Paps lives; Chara shouldn’t be able to feel, anything at all, they were an emotionless killer and yet, they cared about you, protected you-cried for you, even. He should hate you, but he doesn’t. He was angry, furious even but when he saw you there, lying in the snow, motionless and not breathing anymore, your hair stuck to your head, pale skin slowly turning blue and blood seeping through Undyne’s jacket all he felt was pain, as if it was unbearable for him to even think about losing you, seeing you die right there when this was the thing he had hoped for all night. He just couldn’t understand.

 _“Have you come to finish your job?”_ Chara asked into the dark room, not a single emotion in their echoing voice. The skeleton stepped out of the shadow he had been hiding in. If the others had known, they would have just been upset again.

“No.” he answered truthfully, shaking his head slightly, his hands buried in the pockets of his sweater.

 _“Then why are you here?”_ They didn’t even look at him but he couldn’t be mad at them for that.

“Heh… I don’t even know, TIBIA honest.” He admitted, slightly awkward.

 _"You are still making bad jokes, even now?"_ Neither of them said anything for a while, so the room went quiet except for your calm breath. " _Alphys said she won’t wake up anytime soon. The stress on her body and mind was just so high.”_ Charas voice was quiet, their head low. He could see the bedside table through them.

“Why did she save me? Or Frisk and Papyrus? Why does she care so much?”

 _“She didn’t. Well, she did in a way. But furthermore, it was my fault, putting in the input, she just executed it. It is complicated_.”

“I don’t get you.” He admitted, slightly sighing. “I know you, I have seen you in the genocide routes. It’s like two entirely different people…”

“ _You aren’t that wrong. My mind was clouded by hatred and the wish for vengeance.”_ They nodded towards you. _“When she got to the void, she helped me to see clear again, to become me again. It is very much like Flowey and Ree-I mean, Asriel-in a way.”_

 _“_ Why her though?” His voice was strained. “You stuck with Frisk the entirety of the Underground, so why her…”

 _“I wasn’t linked to Frisk like I am with Elaine.” Their voice suddenly grew warmer and ghostly fingers moved over your cheek again. “Frisk and me… Were partners. At least in genocide. I’d like to think we were more of friends in the true pacifist. That might be one sided though. We helped each other out. But we were never really tied together. When they broke the barrier together with Asriel and stepped through it, they severed the connection between us unknowingly. That’s why I was in the void in the first place.”_ There just the slightest bit of hesitation in their voice. _“She was there too. So we had to do something to get out. Now we keep each other alive.”_

“You are lying!” he suddenly said and their whole body-as ghostly and ethereal it was-went rigid and stiff.

_“What?”_

“You are lying. That last bit, that’s not everything, isn’t it!” He stepped closer to them, his eyesockets narrowed.

_“No. I’ve told you and so did she.”_

“She told so because that’s what she believes. But I don’t there’s more to it.” Sans lowered his voice dangerously. “Humans don’t just get stuck in the void.”

Chara was quiet for a long time, he didn’t know if they would respond to him at all. He was just about to say anything, as they spoke up again, a bittersweet smile on their face and tears in their eyes.

 _“I could never tell her. I wanted, I really did, but I could never muster up the courage. She is so sweet, so kind, how could I ever tell her?”_ Sans stayed quiet, not wanting to give them a reason to stop now. _“I’ve done so many things wrong in my life and ever more when I died, I inflicted so much pain, gained L O V E and hurt others. But when I alive, there was still something good inside of me, there must have been. I lost that part of me with my soul, I believe. When Ree took it, the day I killed myself with those flowers…. I brought so much suffering to the underground. I never thought that someone would miss me, so dying to help you didn’t seem that foolish. Having Ree die in the process was never part of that plan. I just wanted to get six souls, that shouldn’t be so hard. People die every day, we just needed to be there. But the humans turned on him and he turned into dust. I wasn’t overly fond of humans before, no one would after they….”_ They stopped and took a deep breath before continuing _“Now however, I despised them. But our souls… well, our soul… it was one of a kind, a bossmonster and a human soul. It’s almost weird how strong they can be and what those things can withstand, even after death.”_ Chara patted your cheek again, very gently and carefully. _“She is special too, you know? All of that determination inside her pretty little soul, her kindness and how strong she actually is, despite having some tendencies to be over dramatic and a crybaby. When I first saw her, it was like looking in the mirror. But her smile is kinder and she isn’t as harsh. I’ve always liked her name too. She was named after her grandmother, Elaine. Did you know that? It’s a pretty name. She once told me, her parents named her Asra, because that was the first thing that had popped into their mind when they saw her. It fits so well. Most people said that, she told me. But they had already promised to name her after her grandmother, she would be upset if she wasn’t. So Elaine Asra Winters it was.”_ Sans was confused. Why did they tell him that? They still didn’t look at him, their hard, red eyes fixed upon your face. There was something else in Charas eyes now though. He didn’t recognise it at first, but he knew that slight glimmer, they were trying to hide. It was the same look Toriel gave Frisk, the look of a parent looking at their child. Their lips curled into a sad smile while his fell from his face.

“No way….” He whispered. Chara gave a small chuckle, almost silent.

_“Well, I always thought that Asra was a better name than Chariel anyways…”_

_You were sleeping. You knew you were sleeping, because these were some of Charas memories, you were reliving right now. Things like these would happen from time to time, you should be used to this, but you still weren’t, it was still so weird seeing the world through someone else’ eyes, your mouth moving without you actually doing it or having any influence on it. Then you remembered that that’s how Chara must feel all the time, stuck inside of you and then you’d feel guilty. This time was different though.  
Usually, you’d dream that you were dying. Remembering the poison of the buttercups burning through your veins for days wasn’t a pleasant memory, yours or not. You did your best to hide the pain away but once the dizziness came, it was impossible. Then it started to burn. Actually burn your insides. Then the blood would come, you just wouldn’t stop bleeding. You were vomiting so much, that your throat and oesophagus were raw already, now the blood would mix with it too, making it even worse. Lastly, even breathing would cause you pain. So much that you eventually preferred not breathing at all. Buttercups weren’t a pleasurable death and they sure as hell weren’t the fastest either. The most painful thing about this though, was your family, Asgore, Toriel and Asriel, your best friend. No, Charas best friend, you reminded yourself. This wasn’t you. You didn’t die here. _

_When you didn’t dream of dying, you were dreaming of the darkness. You had died and Asriel had taken your soul. And then he died, something you never wanted to happen, you never even thought about it. The thought alone felt worse than any poison ever could. And still he did._  
Asriel died and your soul just vanished.  
And now you were stuck in an eternal darkness. Unable to move, unable to speak. You were completely alone and abandoned. Was this punishment for what you’ve done? Probably.

_Until…_

_Until Frisk arrived. Their soul, their determination so similar to yours that it woke you from your slumber. You could remember what happened then. But never before. Things changed however. This time, you could._

_You could feel the slightly damp stone beneath you as you were staring up at the crystals in Waterfall, something the monsters used as wishing stars. It was sad, you thought, that these crystals were the closest thing to real stars they’d ever get to know. They were beautiful, yes, but nothing compared to the real thing._

_“Chara…” Asriel asked next to you and you turned your hear._

_“Yeah, Ree?”_

_“What do real stars look like?”_

_“Silly.” You smiled at him, the only one to ever get some of your real smiles. “Why don’t you just look up!”_

_“Are they really the same?”_

_“Yeah, of course! Nothing on the surface is that great, really. You even got the stars down here!”_

_“But the surface has humans!”_

_“Humans aren’t great.” You said bitterly._

_“But I think you are great!” You could feel a blush creep up your cheeks._

_“R-Ree! Stop being such a sap! But you are right. You’ve got me down here, so you don’t need humans! They just make trouble. I’m the best example” You tried laughing, but it came out just a bit too forced, echoing from the walls._

_“But you aren’t any trouble, Chara! Are you still conscious about staying with us? Come on, everyone loves you!”_

_“Even you?” you teased, sticking out your tongue at him._

_“Yes, of course! You are my best friend Chara, in the whole wide world. Of course I love you!” He smiled at with that goofy, big smile of his and you turned away from him again to hide your monstrous blush._

_“Oh, shuddup, you dork!” you mumbled. “Why would anyone ever love me?”_

_“Now you are being silly!” Asriel said, also lying on his back to look at the wishing stars. “Monsters are made of love and compassion, so it is natural to do so!”_

_“But… I am a human. Humans don’t need love to survive.”_

_“Of course not!” He sounded overly serious now, as if he tried to sound adult. “Mom said that monsters were made to love. Humans are different though. You were to be loved!” You rolled to your side, stunned, and so did he, grinning at you. “So thank you for coming to us, Chara!” You could feel tears building up in your eyes. This was the first time someone was glad to have you around, happy that you were alive. How? Why? Weren’t you a demon? Everyone on the surface thought that. Humans despised you for it, calling you all sorts of names. But that made you fit in here somewhat well. After all they had a Mom Goat, a Dad Goat, a Baby Goat so why not a Scapegoat?_

_“You are an idiot, Ree!” You simply said, unable to properly express your emotions but he was just laughing at you. “But you are also my best friend, so it’s okay!”_

_“You know, Chara, one day I wanna go and watch the stars with you. The real stars!” You simply smiled, your voice quiet and calm._

_“Yeah. Me too…”_

_It was a good memory. One of your happiest. All of your happy memories included the monsters. You had none when you were thinking about the surface. There was only hate up there. But the monsters… They showed you nothing but kindness and you loved them for it. Especially Asriel. You’d never admit it though._

_And then the scene changed again._

_It scared you._

_The real you. Not Chara. This wasn’t their memory anymore. Or was is? You couldn’t tell._

_You could see the underground, it was empty. Not a single sound came through and dust covered every last inch of the area. Was this the result of a genocide route? No, it couldn’t be, this was different, felt different._  
_Someone was sitting in Asgores Throne. You couldn’t see at first, only when you were stepping closer, the leaves of dead flowers crunching underneath your feet. It was so quiet, that the sound was overly loud, way louder than it should have been. You arrived at the throne and you could feel your blood freeze in your veins. You were looking at yourself. Or was it Chara? Did it make a difference? Was there a difference at all?_  
_You looked different though. Clad in a gown of emerald brocade with golden embroidery all over, a crown of golden flowers on your head. Your eyes were closed and a smile on your face. You were sitting still, didn’t move at all. Your pale hands were on the rests, the sleeves of the strangely beautiful gown just so reaching your knuckles._  
_Suddenly, you could hear the crunching again and you ripped away your gaze from your unmoving body to behind the throne. The whole room was shrouded in darkness, all you could see was a pair of red eyes, glowing in the shadows and making your hairs stand up._

_“Asra…” he whispered. It was clearly a he, with a deep and rumbly voice but also… strangely familiar. As he said the name, your mirror image opened her eyes, those cursed red eyes, and she giggled._

_“We knew you’d come sooner or later..” Colour drained from your face. Could they see you? Did they know that you were here?_

_No._

_You whipped around when someone laughed into your ear, another voice, but one you knew way to well and scared you more than anything else._

_“Sure. After all, I’ve been hunting for you for so long now…”_

_All you could see before you jolted away was your soul, wrapped up in blue strings._

 

You sat up with a strangled scream, Chara immediately by your side.

 _“You’re awake!”_ they whispered. It was dark outside, so was the room. You were alone.

“Did you see that too?” you asked Chara and they lowered their gaze, nodding.  

_“Yeah…”_

“Was it one of yours? Your memories?” They didn’t answer just shook their head and your intestines felt like they were twisted together in a knot. “Chara, what was that…?”

_“I don’t know. You must have had a bad dream.”_

“No, it felt too real. You saw what I did!” They smiled at you, but it never quite reached their eyes.

_“It was a dream. You have nothing to fear anymore.”_

“Chara, he’s coming for us!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. That just happened.


	24. HERE, HAVE SOME DIABETES!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FLUFF! 
> 
>  
> 
> finally. And this time, it's for real!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MOMMA HAD COLLEGE FINALS AND SHE IS TIRED AS FUCK BUT DOESN'T WANT TO LEAVE YOU HANGING-EVEN MORE!  
> (and I had a shit day and this makes me really happy, yeh?)

It was a calm night. The snow fell from the gray sky towards the earth, covering everything in a thick, white blanket and calamity. The snow was at least 10cm by now, probably more. You felt surprisingly calm as well. You shouldn’t feel so calm; you’ve been through so much these past 24hours. No, that wasn’t quite right…. You’ve been through enough these past _years_. You’ve lost your family, you’ve been in a coma, got stuck in the void, basically kidnapped, beaten, bruised, tortured-both mentally and physically, stabbed, shot and drowned. You’ve been used to blackmail your own aunt and you were forced to fight both your worst nightmare and someone that was as close to you as they could get, leaving Chara aside.

And yet… you were still okay. You didn’t feel sad or frightened or anything. Every normal person would have been traumatised and nothing more than a puddle on the ground but giving up has never been your style. So you just got up and tried to handle the situation.

You were calm now.

Giving up was not an option, showing weakness now instead of strength fatal.

The apartment was quiet and dark, everyone was asleep.

 _“You really wanna do this?”_ Chara whispered in a hushed voice and you nodded.

“Yes, we talked about that. I have everything settled already. It’s in the middle of the night, everyone’s asleep, no one knows I am awake already.”

_“Because you shouldn’t be. You should go back to bed and catch up on more sleep. You almost drowned and froze to death a few hours ago after you’ve been shot!”_

“I know. I’ll sleep later, I promise. I’m just not in the mood for the nightmares right now. Despite that, we have somewhat of a time window right now. And it’s better like that…”

_“I am not so sure about that…”_

“Chara. It’s okay.” You turned around and smiled gently before going over to the bed, picking up the letter you’ve wrote a while back. “I still can’t believe that Sans let me sleep in his bed. But it made it easier to grab my bag. And you thought that I was being paranoid for packing it ages ago.”

 _“No, I thought you were paranoid for writing that stupid letter in advanced, trying to explain_ _everything and stuff. What if Sans or Papyrus would have found your duffle bag and read it?”_

“They wouldn’t. And I’ve been storing this away for quite some time now. You worry too much!” You smiled at them and closed the zip of the bag and placed the sealed letter on the pillow before you went over to the window. A shudder went down your spine as you opened it as carefully as possible. It was cold outside, but this time, you were prepared. You wore one of your most comfortable, grey shirts, that still clung to you nicely and a zipped up, dark green hoodie on top. You still had your short, warm wool-jacket in your bag but you wouldn’t put it on just now, you were afraid to rip it.  
You looked down at the street, poking your upper body out of the window before taking a deep breath and dropping the bag outside. It landed with a soft _THUD_ in the freshly fallen snow.

 _“I still think that this is a stupid idea! You are gonna break both of your ankles in the best case and_ _your neck in the worst one.”_

“Oh what do you recon? Using the front door? It’s not like they would just let me stroll out now to never come back!”

_“It’s a better idea than this!”_

“Hush now, Chara. This isn’t the first time I climbed down a wall or jumped out of a window! I was a weird child!”

_“What kind of childhood did you have?”_

“My aunt is a donna and my mom used to be a daring reporter, do you really think they would have sent me out to the world unprepared?”

_“Does that include jumping out of windows?”_

“Among other things.”

_“This is stupid.”_

“You are stupid.” You put both of your hands on the windowsill, swinging your legs over it, so you were dangling against the façade of the complex. It’s been a while since you did this the last time and the strain on your bad shoulder stung quite a lot but you clenched your teeth and started to climb down as quickly as possible. Your bad arm was basically numb by the time you had descended two stories. Sweat was building on your forehead and you glanced down, judging the distance to the earth _. I can do ¾ of a story, right_?; you asked yourself and decided, _yes, yes you could_. Taking a deep breath you pushed off of the small ledge you were holding onto. The icy air was stinging in your eyes and you came down in the snow, rolling over your good shoulder and getting up. Your knees were wobbly, so you almost fell, but this time you stood your ground. You waved at Chara, who was still upstairs and they joined you by simply stepping out of the window. Since they didn’t have a corporeal form, they didn’t have to worry about breaking anything or physics, so when they came down, they just walked it off like they took the last step of a flight of stairs. A scowl was on their face, as you kneeled down and got the warm wintercoat out of your duffle bag as well as a baseballcap.

 _“You didn’t tell me you were actually going to jump!”_ they hissed but you just shrugged and put both of the clothing items on, pulling the hood of your sweater over the cap. _“This looks stupid. It’s never gonna work and hide you!”_

“It worked for Captain America!”

_“Captain America is a character in a movie and he doesn’t have red eyes.”_

“Yeah, but I can hide those. And Steve has those biceps of his.”

 _“Okay, you got a point there! He does have some sweet biceps.”_ they admitted and you grinned at them. They playfully snapped against the rim of the cap, pouting slightly. _“Okay, Team Cap, now stop just standing around and let’s get going, since you insist of doing this this way.”_

“You are worse than Sans when it comes to stupid joke!”

 _“That, my dear, is an impossible paradox in itself!”_ You looked up at the opened window, smiling sadly and putting the strap of the bag across your shoulders. This was goodbye then.

“Now you are being pretentious!” You mocked Chara in a soft voice, as you started walking besides each other, the sun slowly rising in the far distance.

Snow was quickly sprinkled on your shoulders and hood, your boots made a crunching sound as you walked. Chara walked next to you, only visible to you. Naturally, they didn’t leave any footprints. Chara didn’t need to walk, they could just float through the air; just like they didn’t actually need legs, it was just easier on your eyes than half a torso and an almost comical ghostly trail. You’ve compared it to one of your favourite Cartoons from your childhood-not that you are still totally into it, absolutely not, who still likes cartoon in their early twenties, pffft! And you still totally did not have a major crush on the main character! Ridiculous! You only remembered the exact words to the opening to this day because… damn it. Running out of excuses. -Danny Phantom, which also featured a ghost-well, half ghost. Chara had sulked after that for a while and you still liked to tease them with it.

Neither of you were sulking now though, just walked down the road in silence, the sun now high on the sky. If you get stuck with each other 24/7, you can’t argue all the time. Some friendly, sibling quarrels, sure, but if you argue-actually argue-without being able to get away from each other. It can destroy you, you know?  
You were lucky, that Chara and you were a match made in heaven when it came to that.

_“Laney?”_

“Yes?” You answered just as quiet, as they had asked you.

_“Can I ask you something?”_

“You are going to do anyway, so go ahead, be my guest.”

 _“Say, where are we going now?”_ You stopped and thought about this question for a while. Did you know?

“Counter-question.” You started out softly and Charas eyebrows shot up. “If you’d be out on the look for us, where would you go and search first?”

_“First? Curly and your Aunt. But then again, you’d never endanger someone else on purpose. So that falls flat…”_

“Correct. So, where would we be?”

_“I don’t know? Go back to your old house?”_

“Right. But that would be stupid, after all that’s the first place, they would go and look.”

_“Yes but you aren’t stupid…”_

“No, I am not.” You smiled at then and suddenly their confusion lifted and a smirk replaced it.

_“Ah! You don’t wanna be found. So yeah, going there would be stupid and everyone knows you aren’t. So why even bother?”_

“Exactly.”

_“So that’s where we are going!”_

“ _God no!_ That would be a silly idea! I’m not that dumb. I have no idea where to go and just wanted to sound smart and gimme a few more seconds to find a better answer to your question!” Chara sighed and rolled their eyes.

_“And for a second there, I thought you had an actual plan!”_

“I always have a plan! But let’s be honest, how often do they actually work out for us?”

 _“Not that often, I have to admit…_ ” they said after a moment or two of hesitation.

“See? So yeah, I’ve been walking around a tad aimlessly for a while now. Initially, when I started to prepare for this whole thing, I did plan to go back to the house, after all, none of them knew about it but now…”

 _“I think you had some pretty good reasoning though. We should try it, at least. You are still hurt and need to sleep.”_ You sighed and sat down on a snow-covered park bench. Your fingers were so cold so you cupped them in front of your face and blew on them to warm them up. The tips were already red and a bit stiff. Chara stood in front of you and put their ghostly hands around yours-they felt surprisingly warm. _“I packed you some gloves a while ago, after it started to get colder. They are in the side pocket.”_ You nodded gratefully and opened the zip of the duffle bag to get the gloves. A warm smile on your lips, you grabbed your favourite pair-a birthdaypresent from your mom when you were 16. They were black and the softest nappaleather you can imagine, lined with a thick wool coating.  You adored them, adored how elegant they looked and how they made your hands look really feminine and graceful instead of rough and fucked up from working with them. But the thing you loved the most about it, was that they were a gift from your mom. The thought of her alone made your heart sting and eyes water. Then you thought about father and sister and your eyes watered a bit more. Suppressing a sob, you put the gloves on and wrapped your arms around your torso. The ghostly appearance of Chara sat next to you and hugged you carefully, their chin resting on your head. _“Hey, it’s alright. I know it’s hard, I can feel how much you miss them. We-We don’t have to go back there, we’ll find something else. Please don’t cry, buttercup, I’m here…”_ They soothed you and you leaned into the touch. They felt surprisingly substantial, as if they were actually here but… just not quite.

“I am tired Chara.” You whispered, a sad smile on your face.

 _“It’s okay. I know. I am tired as well…”_ Both of you knew that you weren’t talking about actual fatigue.

“I don’t want to run anymore. I know, it’s just noon but… I already miss them. I actually liked those guys and they were the best friends I’ve ever had, Curls aside. And I miss them. Leaving everyone behind is slowly breaking my heart and knowing that we can’t go back even more.” You sounded so heartbroken, if you had just looked up, you could have seen the anguish in Charas eyes your voice and words caused them, but then again, it would just make you feel worse which then would make them feel worse and so on and on. “I miss them. And I’m gonna miss them even more as time will pass. I’ll miss Miss Toriel and her kindness and her warmth, I’ll miss Alphys and her total nerd outs and that you can just geek around with her. I’ll miss the kid and I’ll miss Paps. Even his cooking. I never wanted his spaghetti more than right now!” Chara snorted for a second and you let out a broken giggle. “Oh shuddup. I’ll miss Undyne and Metta, so so much. I’ll miss the sound of something breaking in the morning or the smell of fire when someone set the kitchen ablaze yet again. I’ll miss the bad jokes and the quiet times alike. I felt safe there, home and suddenly we are out on our own again. God damn it, I even miss Sans, as much of an idiot he can be.” You blinked away your tears and sniffled. “I might just miss him the most, honestly. I-I don’t need to tell you why, you know anyways and I am way too dumb to actually say it out loud and make it real but damn. I already miss him. I miss all of them.” You wanted to tell Chara how thankful you were for them, how lucky you were to not be alone. You’d lie if you said that you didn’t love the Chost like a sibling, almost like a twin. But your relationship with each other was somewhat weird. You were like twins but ever so often, you could both totally shift into mom-mode and fuzz over the others.

_“Hey, I know but it’s alright. I am sorry that I have to put you through this, Laney, I truly am. But I won’t leave you okay? We’ll find a way. So please, don’t be upset. It’s hard but… things will get easier again. I promise.”_

“I know, they always do. But right now… I don’t feel my usual strong, battleridden self, I feel weak and tired and… and _human_. I hate it.”

 _“Elaine, you_ are _human…”_ Chara suddenly sounded wary and you huffed dismissively.

“I am just as much human as you are.” 23 years of unresolved anger lingered in your voice. “Just look at my eyes. I’ve been told that I am a demon ever since I can remember. And Auntie Hel couldn’t kill them all. Well, she could, but I didn’t let her” You freed yourself from the hug and let your gaze linger around, looking at the people around you. “And honestly… I’d rather be a demon or monster than human at this point. I don’t hate them for what has happened you can’t blame an entire species for the flaws of a few but… I don’t know. I don’t really belong. Either, human or monsters. I’m just me.” You started to smile, this time a tad more genuine. “But being me isn’t that bad actually. The way I am, I’m able to help the people. Everyone. And I want to help them. I am a pacifist after all.”

 _“You still know how to deal a mean punch though.”_ You chuckled and burrowed your hands inside the pockets of your coat.

“Just because I am a very peaceful person, I am not naïve. If someone threatens me, I will bite back. If someone threatens the people around me, I will bite twice as hard. Just because I believe that there are other, peaceful ways, that doesn’t mean that I am going to be defenceless. I do the things I do, so other people don’t have to.”

 _“You can be so weird sometimes, Laney.”_ Chara followed your gaze, now also looking around. _“Sometimes you remind me a lot of Ree….Asriel, I mean.”_

“Heh. You knew him the best after all…”

 _“Yeah, I did…”_ You sat there in silence for a while, letting the snow drizzle down on you and watching the people walk by.

“Say, how do you cope?”

_“Cope with what?”_

“Loss? I… I don’t think I am actually coping but rather suppressing everything. That’s why I am still out and about, because I shove everything to the side.”

_“So that’s how you are doing it. I was starting to wonder, one girl can only take so much.”_

“Yeah, I know it’s not the best and probably pretty unhealthy and will come back to bite me in the ass but for now it keeps me alive. I don’t think it’ll work this time though.”

_“It will never really go away. The pain will stay, especially after losing someone you lo…”_

“Don’t say it.”

 _“You_ like _. But it will get easier. It will get easier and you’ll get happy again.”_

“Are you happy?” Taken aback by your question they opened their mouth but didn’t know what to say. You grimaced and nodded. “You don’t have to answer. I can feel it, right here.” You patted the space above your heart.

_“You shouldn’t have to. You already have so much to worry about, you don’t need my messy agenda to burden you as well.”_

“You’ll never be a burden to me.” You snapped just a tad too harsh. “When will you and everyone else finally see that you aren’t a bother or sorts of to me? It’s not like I am being forced to, I chose this path for my own. So stop feeling guilty for my decisions. My choices are mine and mine alone. I made them on my own, seeing as I am very much an adult woman even though I might still look 5 years too young. I’ve been forced to make decisions and be an adult since I’ve been about 11 years old. So please, stop feeling guilty for something you had no influence on. Same goes for Sans. He still felt bad for things I did because I decided to do them! As if he somehow made me do it!”

 _“I still stay with my first statement. You can be so weird sometimes.”_ You only chuckled almost silent and shrugged.

“I’m just thinking a lot. I… Before I came to Sans and the others-and even a little bit back then-I used to stop myself from overthinking everything like I’m doing now by just never stopping to work. I’d always have something to do and didn’t even bother so stop and take a breath. Stopping would mean that I had to confront things and I wasn’t too fond of that. But I couldn’t do that with the others? I didn’t have the possibilities to do any of my favourite hobbies and I’m not very talented when it comes to stuff like drawing for example, small things you can just do anywhere. So I started to think again. You know, I wanted to finish my doctors degree, even though I hated quantum physics and totally suck at them but Hugh made me do it and I was almost done. I basically only need to finish my doctors thesis and that’s it. It’s something I’d have to show off for future references, ya know, now that we need to start a new life basically. And I highly doubt that I can go back to Metta for my current job. I could roam all of my bank accounts and try to see if mom and dad still have some money deposited and just get the hell outta here.” You leaned back and smiled a crooked smile. “I miss Ireland, we went there every summer until the accident. My Nanna and mom and aunt moved here when they were very young but they were very keen to keep our heritage close. My Gaelic wasn’t the best, even though I’ve been raised bilingual. Lizzy was always the one that had a real talent for languages. It showed in school, too. I’ve always shined in the creative subjects, since we went to a fashion and tailoring school with a high focus on languages. And when I say shined, then I mean that I was absolutely bloody brilliant in making things and sewing and everything but languages, maths and so, I totally sucked every dick. Like. A whole bag o’ dicks. I was horrendous! I’m glad I just somehow slipped through every year without failing. I mean, I wasn’t terrible to a point where I had to repeat a class or something, but you know… I just scraped by. Lizzy however has always been an A Student. And she was sociable and… Thinking back, how the hell did she do that?” Your brows furrowed and you felt your eyes prickle again. Taking a deep breath you looked up into the sky, your voice now shaky and unstable. “Everyone loved her. I’m-I’m sure that she had every possibility spread out in front of her. I still can’t believe that she’s gone. I think about her a lot lately. How it should have been her, surviving, not me. She was the special one, I’m just… me. I mean, I am not overly bland but I am not exciting or special in any way. I see myself as just… existing. You know, I could easily be just some NPC in a game or that one weird background-character, that pops up once in a while and doesn’t even get a name in the credit, t’s just “WEIRD DUDE THAT CARRIED A BARREL IN THAT ONE SCENE”. So maybe all of this is just some weird way of the universe punishing me for surviving when I shouldn’t have.” You felt a ghostly hand brush across your cheek in a kind fashion.

 _“You are being too harsh on yourself, buttercup. You are more special than you think. You are a kind, passionate, friendly, pretty lady with a lot of talents and more determination in your fingertip than most humans in this city combined.”_ You snorted.

“You sound like Papyrus. I didn’t know that you could be so optimistic!”

“ _Idiot!_ ” You laughed again and wiped away the tears that were still stinging in your eyes.

“There is the Chara I know.” You let out a long sigh and opened your eyes, glancing over to Chara. They were looking up at the sky as well. “It’s getting late. We should get going again.”

“ _Are you feeling okay enough to do this? Strong enough?”_

“No, I don’t actually. That doesn’t mean that I am not capable of doing so. I am terribly heartbroken but I can still get up and walk away. As much as I miss everyone.” Suddenly Chara grinned as if they just made a horrendously funny joke and a shudder went down your spine.

 _“Even Sans?”_ You huffed and blew up your cheeks as if you were sulking.

“Of course. Especially Sans. Even though he tries to kill us!”

 _“Oh, good.”_ A terribly familiar, rumbly voice chuckled next to you and you snapped around, staring at the shorter skeleton brother, just casually sitting next to you. You let out a strangely strangled sound that sounded suspiciously like “ **YEET**!” from that one stupid vine Undyne had showed you a while back and literally had you in tears of laughter and you grabbed the nearest thing to you, throwing it right into his face-in that case your duffel bag. You tried to grab Chara in your shock and throw them but since they were not really corporeal, that rendered itself useless and you caught onto the strap of your bag-and jumped up to start running. And for the 500 th hundred time this week, you slipped on the icy pathway and fell down with a shrill screech. You sat up at the parkbench and saw Chara doubled over laughing their non-existent butt off and Sans dropping your bag you smacked him round the block with.

“I have fallen, and I choose _NOT_ to get up!” you stated the obvious and pouted.

 _“I was wondering when you would show up here Sans.”_ Chara said and your face fell.

“You _knew_ he would come?”

 _“Duh, he can still sense your soul.”_ Your hand smacked against your forehead with an open palm and you groaned.

“How did I forget about that?”

 _“You can be a pretty big nubskull…”_ You moaned at the terrible pun and wanted to pull your face off, as the two of them snickered at the bad pun. Grimacing you stared at the suspiciously relaxed skeleton.  
 “Are ya here ter finish me off once and for all.” You could hear your ghostly friend snicker and mutter something under their breath that involved Sans and spaghetti and you glared at them until they shut up.

“Naw, too much work. Besides that, you are doing a pretty darn well job yourself, no bones about it.” You were too get back up, knowing that you would probably just end on the ground again, so you stayed where you were, still ready to run off though. Or slitter. Depends.

“Then why are you he-Oh, will you stop laughing over there?” you hissed, shaking your head in disbelief. “Eejit!” Chara pressed their lips together, still vibrating with laughter and you shifted your focus back to Sans. “If you aren’t here to kill us, then why are you?” The skeleton shrugged a little bit.

“To bring you back.”

“Oh you gotta be kidding me!” You snorted. “Why would you want me back. Why would any of you?” Sans sighed and you got up again, now vary. And because your butt was drenched from the snow by now. You did not think this through.

“Papyrus found your letter first. He didn’t believe it, even though you wrote some pretty good things in there. It was a _bone_ -fide letter.” You groaned a bit louder this time. “Then Undyne read it.”

“Oh god what did she break?” you muttered but Sans only stared at you with those glowing white pinpricks.

“Herself.” He simply stated and your eyebrows shot up.

“Excuse me?” Your brain went a weird direction where she beat someone up with her own arm or throwing her eye around the place. Chara was right, you were weird as heck. “Did she punch a wall and break her hand?”

“She’s been crying, Elaine.” If you’d been carrying a glass with you, this would have been the moment where you dropped it and it would then shatter into a million pieces on the ground. Instead, you almost felt your heart shatter instead.

“Undyne…. Crying…. No that’s not… She would never… Undyne can cry?” Your mind was completely white now, guilt eating you up on the inside.

“She hasn’t stopped when I left.” His serious tone indicated that he wasn’t joking around and you moved back instinctively. “Papyrus misses you too already.” You took another step back and raised your hands in front of you. Sans now got up and approached carefully. The streetlights above you turned on with a tiny crack and for a second your gaze flickered up. When did it get this late? When you looked back, he was already closer. “So does the kid. They don’t know yet that you don’t plan on coming back, keep asking about you.” You felt tears prickling in your eyes. “Even the calculator stopped by to visit you but you weren’t there anymore.” Your breathing started to become heavy, your eyes were now completely watery and ready to spill over. Chara must have noticed, as they got up in a very protective manner now, like a lioness protecting her cub. “Elaine… Please.” Sans whispered and you pressed your hands against your face, shaking your head so hard that your hair went flying.

“Stop… please.” You whimpered. God, you were pathetic. “Please just stop!”

“Just come home.” His voice was soft and oh god, it broke you in every way possible. “ _I_ miss you.” That’s it. That’s the thing that just fucking broke you. Your knees buckled underneath you and you had to sit down, your legs in a w-position as the tears finally-finally-spilled over, sobs falling from your lips.

“I don’t wanna go!” you cried out, finally letting everything out. “I am so scared Sans. I am scared to be on our own again. I am tired of fighting everyone, I just wanna go home and be happy but everywhere I go, I bring trouble along. I almost got all of you killed. And you hate me. I am so sorry, I never wanted this to turn this sour, I am sorry. Please don’t kill me, we didn’t do anything wrong, I am so sorry. I am sorry for hurting everyone, I never meant to. Please don’t hate me, I am sorry.” You sobbed, not really making sense of what you were rambling on yourself.

“Hey, Elaine, look at me.” Sans whispered. You glanced through your fingers-and tears-and saw that he was crouching in front of you. You could feel Charas Arms around you, giving you as much emotional support and strength as you needed. “Please?” he begged and you lowered your hands, slowly, still sobbing frantically. “I don’t hate you. I tried really really hard to, tibia-honest, but I can’t. I can’t deny that I wanted to end you and your demon spawn there so badly but once I saw you-actually saw you-splayed out, not breathing anymore and your heart barely beating, skin ice-cold and slowly turning blue… It hurt. It hurt so bad. I couldn’t understand, I should hate you, but I can’t.” A bony hand reached up to your face to wipe away a tear-buddy, lost fight there-that was running down your cheek and you flinched ever so slightly. God, you couldn’t even look him into the eyes. “Elaine, please come back home. I’d rather have the two of you there instead none of you. The others want you back too. And I know, if I don’t get to say what I have to say now, you will be gone-probably forever.” More tears made their way out of your eyes and you couldn’t help but fling your arms around the skeletal monster, sobbing and probably looking totally miserable and gross and pathetic.

“Why can’t you just hate me? It would make everything so much easier! I don’t wanna go but I’m only a troublemaker. It would be easier if you hated me. All of you. Why is it so hard?” He gently pulled you back and put a hand on your cheek.

“These things are never easy. I am so sorry that I hurt you, but please. Please come back with me, Elaine.” You were still crying but now a weak laugh fell from your lips.

“Sans, you are such an eejit!” He started to laugh as well, more awkwardly though.

“I have no idea, what you just said, but I’ pretty sure it was one of those adorable little Irish insults you like to throw around since Paps and Frisk won’t understand them” This time your laugh was a bit less pathetic.

“I miss them. I know, I haven’t been gone for long but I miss them. I missed you too, even though I knew you’d hate me and that I had to fight you eventually. But I still missed you. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, buddy, I got you. It’s okay. Everything’s going to be okay. Just come home please” His voice was strained and you took his hand, carefully intervening your fingers. His other hand was still on your cheek and your foreheads touched tenderly.

“Okay.” You just whispered, or rather hiccupped. Disbelief was on his face before his never faltering grin became even wider than anything you’ve ever seen before.

“Really?

“Yes, you numbskull!” You laughed and he joined you.

“I’m going to kiss you now, if you don’t mind.” He chuckled and you shook your head with a big smile.

“I don’t mind at all.”

“Then I will kiss you now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #TeamBICEPS!


	25. A broken hallelujah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SOME MORE FLUFF!
> 
> #FLANGSTY

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw, I am taking requests for some filler chapters inbetween plot, so if you have something you'd like to see, please tell me ;) <3

The second you stepped back into the brothers apartment, you were tackled by at least three people. You landed with a harsh _ooff_ on the carpeted floor, knocking the wind out of you as you became the fundament of said meat pile. Well, at least one component of the pile was bones, so you weren’t too sure if you could actually call it meat pile.  
Too many voices were pouring in on you as you were still busy catching your breath and wriggling out underneath your assaulters. You gritted your teeth as your shoulder started to sting as if struck by lightning again. Oh golly, this would take a while to heal up properly, wouldn’t it?

You were spoiled by healing up pretty fast usually or having Toriel actually heal it for you but after all, you haven’t been shot before. And you really hoped that it would be a onetime occurrence, shit hurt like a bitch.

You finally managed to free yourself and sat up again, shaking your head and blowing up your cheeks slightly, eyes big and round and probably still puffy and red from crying yourself. There were still so many people trying to outtalk each other, so at one point, everybody was just shouting. For some reason, as your eyes wandered over the warm and lively room, you couldn’t help yourself but break out into a fit of bubbly giggling that quickly grew into a happy laugh. At the same time though, tears were forcing their way back into your eyes, not enough to spill over but enough so it was noticeable.

God, how pathetic you must look. Sitting on the floor, your legs in a w-position and laughing and crying at the same time, probably looking like you dug your way out of your own grave. Your face must be so pale, your freckles clearly visible now and dark shadows under your eyes that would easily get you into a band of racoons. Your hair was probably completely distraught by now, your clothes drenched and dirtied and blood sickering through the gauzes around your shoulder again. And still, you were so happy in this exact moment, that you couldn’t stop laughing.

You only halted when a hand gripped your shoulder gently but yet firm and you turned your head to beam up to Sans. He simply chuckled and you took the time to look around. Everyone was here, sitting on the floor with you. Well, except for Toriel, who was standing a bit in the back and Sans, obviously.

Still chuckling too yourself, you wiped the tears from your eyes with your wrist, sniffling a little bit.

Undne was the first to tackle you in another hug, almost tipping you over again.

“ _Never_. Do something like that. Again!” she growled and you wrapped your arms around her to reciprocate.

“I’m sorry.” You only mumbled, closing your eyes for a moment. When you opened them again, she let go of you, now pulling you in for a noogie. “Undyne! Please don’t noogie the human!” you whined and struggled to get out of her grip.

“That’s what you get for running off like that and worrying us to DEATH, Punk!”

“Ow, ow, ow, Undyne stoooop!” you winced, because you wriggled your shoulder just a tad too much, immediately sulking at your own body at the betrayal. She finally let go, and you stuck out your tongue at her.

“How did you even manage to do that, darling?” Mettaton asked, gracefully as ever, even when he was just sitting on the floor, he was posing better than 99% of the models in any magazine lately. “We were in the living room and none of us heard the door unlock or open.”

“I uh. I… didn’t use the door.” You admitted meekly.

“You what.”

“Ahm…” You stared at the floor, your face twisted into a grimace as if you just got caught in the act. “You might have noticed that the window was open in the room…” You tried to speak as slowly as possible and immediately screwed your eyes and mouth tight as Undyne snapped up, grasping for air like a fish on dry… oh.

“You _jumped_ out of the _window_? We’re on the third floor!” Mettaton gasped and you blew up your cheeks again.

“Well, technically I jumped from the first floor, the rest I climbed!” you insisted while Undyne probably had a complete meltdown, gesturing at you wildly.

“HUMAN, YOU WERE HURT! THAT WAS VERY DANGEROUS!” Papyrus chimed in and you dismissed his words with a gesture of your hand.

“Oh, don’t worry Paps, this isn’t the first window I…. BEAUTIFUL DAY, ISN’T IT?” You interrupted yourself in the middle of your sentence, noticing that telling everyone that you used to take the window route more often than not at a previous point in your life, would be quite the stupid thing to do. Especially right now.

“You jumped out of the window??? What is wrong with you? What is wrong with using the door?“ Jup, Undyne definitely had a complete meltdown right now. You just looked piqued, wrinkling your nose a tiny bit.

“Doors are for people without imagination, Undyne!”

**Cool!** Frisk signed and you grinned at them. **You’re so badass!**

“DO NOT ENCOURAGE THEM, TINY HUMAN!”

“Y-Yes, that was e-extremely dangerous, Elaine!” Alphys said, though uncomfortable. You sighed and averted your eyes, now a lot calmer and also a tiny bit sad.

“I know very well, that I’ve acted rashly and made you very upset, but I didn’t mean any harm, I promise. I just thought, that-now that all of you knew that me and Chara… That I kept this a secret from you, you would be all sorts of upset. Or mad or sad, I don’t know. Chara and me… Both of us did so many things that were stupid or wrong, but they are the only family I have left, I am still close to. For a long time, I thought that they truly were the only one left, I was just as surprised that my Aunt showed up as you were. And after everything, I just couldn’t allow for more trouble or pain to be caused by me, to neither you nor them. It…” You kneaded your shaking fingers, still looking at the slightly used carpet. “It hurt me more than the bullet wound in my shoulder, I have to admit that. But I’d rather take the pain than have any of you suffer. If-If Sans wouldn’t have come and told me that my absence caused you just as much, I… I don’t have all of the answers. I am just human. Sometimes I fu….mess up. Actually, I mess up a lot. But I am trying to do the best. And since my way did not work out, I figured that I could at least come and try yours. Maybe you know more than I do. So I… no, not quite… So _we_ are willing to try.” Chara gave a little nudge inside of you that filled you with warmth and fuzziness, a gentle smile across your face.

**Are they with you now?**

You blinked at Frisk, surprised by the question. Of all people, they had the best reason to hate you and Chara equally. After all, it was them, having to suffer from all of those deaths and resets and the torture, oh god, all the things that had happened. They suffered most from it. Did they hate you as well, just like Sans?

“Uh yeah… They are with me all the time. That’s kind of the catch with this whole being stuck together thing, you know?” you answered very carefully and their face scrunched up as they were thinking, before raising their hands again, this time very carefully.

**Can I talk to them?**

You blinked in surprise and opened your mouth but nothing came out. Sans chimed in to answer for you but you were still stunned.

“I’m not sure if that is such a good moment, kiddo. They must be pretty much bone-tired, after all they….” You didn’t listen to the rest of the sentence, but rather closed your eyes and started to inhale deeply.

_I want to talk to them…_

A smile crept onto your face and you nodded. Of course Chara wanted to talk to them. This was their family initially anyways. You were just carrying them around for the duration.

The thought only stung the tiniest bit, but it’s okay. As long as everyone else was happy, you could be happy too.

_“No, it is alright, Sans.”_ Charas voice was so different from yours. It was a bit more articulate, smoother and deeper but also sterner and colder, lacking your over-enthusiasm. It suited a regal child like they were so much better. You didn’t even know that your vocal cords were able to do that, but hey, you never know what you can do if you don’t try it out. Chara opened your eyes and smiled at Frisk. Their smile wasn’t as warm and inviting as yours but instead a tiny bit sad. At least it was genuine and not a fake like all of yours.  
For a moment, everything seemed to stand still, before a tiny child crashed into you, burying their face in your chest and hugging you as tight as they could.

**I missed you so so so much, Chara!** They signed and Chara laughed. It sounded so much better than yours. The reaction came to you as a surprise. They actually missed Chara? You were happy for them but the ghostly appearance attached to you couldn’t really understand why they would miss them.  Your eyes moved up as you heard the quiet sniff, red eyes meeting those of the Monster Queen, one of her hands pressed against her mouth, eyes glazed and watery.

“My child…” she whispered and you felt the corners of your mouth wander up again.

_“Hello, Mom. It’s been such a long time…_ ” Toriels overjoyed laugh was one of the prettiest sounds you’ve ever heard before. This was right, how it was supposed to be. You were happy for them, glad that they could be back together.

But then why did it hurt so much?

 

Chara sighed and patted Frisks head, still smiling.

_“I missed you too, Frisk”_ they admitted _. “I am surprised, you are happy to see me, though”_

**Are you crazy? Do you know how empty my head was without you? No more snarky remarks or stupid puns. Man, Laney is so lucky to have you now.**

_“But… I did so many horrible things?”_

**Everybody makes mistakes. And in the end, you turned out good. I forgave Flowey for his mistakes so why not you as well?**

That child is way too intelligent for its own good, Jesus Christ. You felt your head shake without your input and it still felt strange.  
Was this was Chara was feeling all the time? Being trapped inside of you, when they are not really a ghost next to you?   
They handle your body with so much care than you, you noticed, now that you didn’t need to move it around yourself. Chara seemed to be so carefully, moving in ways that would make sure, that you don’t get uncomfortable. If you were still the one in control, your shoulder would have soared up at least 5 times by now but they seemed so focused on not causing you any pain, your shoulder didn’t hurt a single time, didn’t even start to bleed again.

Guess having no body for yourself makes you appreciate having one even more. Your eyes flickered over the happy faces in front of you; all of them seemed so relaxed and happy while talking to Chara. Especially Toriel, which was more than understandable. She just got her child back, after all. Who wouldn’t be happy?

It hurt a bit more, this time.

“Chara, I’m tired…” you mumbled and immediately felt guilty for ripping them away from the others. And also disgusted, that you felt like you did.  
Chara immediately nodded.

_“Of course. Finally, I’ve been wondering when you would get tired again. You never sleep enough._ ”They scolded you and chuckled deeply. “ _Can you sleep with everyone around?”_

You mumbled something incoherent and shrugged.

“Nonsense, you uh… You can sleep in my bed, if ya want to.” Sans said and you smiled at him thankfully. “Just promise me to not run off again, okay, kiddo?”

“I am twenty three Sans, You can stop calling me “kid” now, I think” you rumbled quietly. “But fine, I swear…”

“Wait a second” Undyne suddenly interrupted and you stared at her.

“Yes?”

“Weren’t you twenty two when we met?” Your eyes widened and you made a weird noise,

“Haha, you got me there, Undyne! Aaaaay!” you laughed so obviously fake that it must be painful to watch.

“It was your _birthday_ and you didn’t tell us?”

“Aaaaaah, you got me there!” You were still laughing nervously. “Okay, yeah, it was my birthday. But I didn’t feel like celebrating. So yeah. Oups. It’s not a big deal, really? Just my birthday, it’s not like it’s something important or special.”

“I don’t know if that is the most offensive thing I’ve ever heard or the saddest thing.”

“It’s just a thing. Happens every year anyways.” You smiled and tried to get up with a groan, but didn’t really manage. You stretched out your arms towards Sans and made a grabby hand gesture, slightly whining. He chuckled and pulled you up.

“And you really think stuff like that makes you look more like an adult?”

“I am a grown up adult!” you insisted and raised yourself on your tiptoes to be taller. It didn’t work, you were still smaller than Sans. “I am a responsible adult, I do my chores, I have a job an…” Your head snapped around to stare at Mettaton. “I still have a job, right? I’m not fired because I got shot and ran off, right? Because I actually really like that job!” The robot laughed a high pitched laugh that reminded you of a bell or the tweeting of a bird and made a dismissive gesture.

“But of course not, Darling! I’m expecting you back on board as soon as the queen sees you fit enough to work again!”

“Thank fuck” you breathed and immediately slapped your hand in front of your mouth. Oh shit you just swore in front of Papyrus and the kid. Sans would not be happy.  
He growled quietly behind you and you somehow managed to went completely pale and blush at the same time.

“Didn’t we establish that there is no swearing in front of my brother and Frisk?” You rolled your eyes.

“They didn’t hear it. And it just slipped out. Won’t happen again.” He sent you an obviously fake glare and you stuck out your tongue at him.

“Off to bed with you, and without dinner!” You laughed and swatted at his hand.

“Yeah, sure, okay, _Daddy_!” You teased him and rolled your eyes, slightly snickering.

“Kinky.” He simply answered and you snapped your jaw shut, now completely flustered.

“That was not what I meant!” you sputtered and he burst out into laughter.

“God, you should see your face!”

“SANS! STOP TEASING THE HUMAN! THEY’VE HAD A LONG DAY!”

“Sure, Bro, whatever you’re saying” He was still chuckling and you glared a bit more.

“Okay, seriously, what has gotten into you nerds?” Undyne mumbled while Alphys gasped loudly as if she just realised something really important. Her whole face lit up and you shot her a very clear look of “Oh-my-god-suddup-not-now-for-the-love-of-god-hold-it-together-you’ll-get-details-later” and slightly gestured “cut it” around your throat. She pressed both of her tiny hands in front of her mouth and nodded quickly. Gosh, these people would be the death of you.  
Still shaking your head, you made your way to Sans bedroom, saying bye to everyone.  
Gosh, the bed looked s inviting and soft, you couldn’t wait to just get the sleep, you deserved so much. You dropped your duffle bag and opened the zip, pulling out your pj’s and a new pair of panties. As you changed, you let out a loud groan.

Oh, you just _HAD_ to get your period today, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mummy's super tired and exhausted (and slightly grumpy bcs school) now, but don't worry my children, I will be back soon enough! 
> 
> *grumbles* stupid finals, stupid teachers, I swear to god... *grumble grumble*


	26. ...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh yeah, there is a lot of PTSD in this chapter, just so you'll be warned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was hard to write. It started out as a funny chapter and then this happened

A sudden cramp in your lower abdomen pulled you from your slumber and made you curl up in a ball. Groaning, you pulled the blankets over your head and nestled deeper into the pillow.

God, why now? Your body must truly hate you to put you through this every month.

You groaned again as your muscles contradicted, starting out quietly and slowly getting louder. You felt a pat on your shoulder and heard the snicker.

_“Are you okay?”_

“No. I’m dying, Chara!” you whined. “I am bleeding and I feel like crying and really crave chocolate right now but also feel fat.”

_“You are borderline underweight.”_

“Actually, I’m not anymore. And excuse me, I do have curves!”

_“You are still not fat.”_

“I know! It’s my hormones!”

 _“Your hormones aren’t fat”_ You pulled the blanket from your face and glared at the ghostly appearance sitting next to you on the bed.

“You are a jerk!”

_“Add moody to your list.”_

“You’re a giant jerk” They just snickered and you stuck out your tongue at them. Yawning, you stretched. Your legs were only a bit sore and your shoulder didn’t hurt. “I didn’t sleep this well in ages. What time is it?”

_“Around one pm. And maybe it’s because you were actually sleeping in a bed. And  so tired out that you didn’t have nightmares for once”_

“Maybe. And maybe because now I feel a lot easier, since I don’t have this huuuuge thing to hide anymore” You sat up in tailor fashion, rubbing your face. Your back was killing you, flaring up with a sharp pain again as if someone was stabbing you, that made you slump over in pain. Chara next to you writhed as well, obviously in discomfort. “Oh fucking shitballs, jesus fucking Christ on a bike…” you muttered to yourself. Chara started to rub your back; the tough was as light as ever, since they still weren’t corporeal but it helped to ease your anxiety a lot.

“It didn’t hurt like that in quite a while…”

“Yeah, I know why though.”

 _“Oh? Then please, enlighten me.”_ Sarcasm was almost dripping from their voice and you sent them a glare. They seemed so worried and you immediately felt bad.

“I’m getting healthier again…” you mumbled and averted your eyes.

 _“Elaine…”_ You avoided their touch and got out of bed.

“I’m going to take a shower.” You couldn’t look them into the eyes and simply grabbed your laundry from yesterday as well as well as some fresh clothes. You tried to be as quiet as possible as you slipped out of the messy room into the hallway. You could hear muffled voices from the kitchen and quickly poked your head in, another bright smile on your face, as big and happy as it was fake. “Moring!” you chirped and waved at Toriel, who was talking to Frisk. The kid was sitting on the counter, legs dangling and they waved at you with both of their hands. You giggled and looked back at the Queen. “Miss Toriel, would you happen to have some painkillers for me?”

“Of course, they boys should have some in the bathroom cupboard, the left one behind the mirror.”

“Thank you so much, comes in handy; I wanted to take a shower anyways.”

“But of course, my child. Does your shoulder still hurt?” She seemed so worried and you just grimaced at her.

“Nah, shoulder’s actually fine this morning. Pain’s uuuuh… downstairs.”

“Oh.” She said piqued and nodded. “I’ll be sure to prepare a heating bottle for you.”

“Oh, you are such a dear.” You smiled at her while Frisk looked at you in total confusion. “You’ll understand when you are older.” You giggled at them and their confusion grew even more. You went over to the washing machine in the other room and put your dirtied clothes in the basket and then moved over to the basin, trying to wash out the blood by hand before stuffing it in the basket as well. The machine by itself never gets it completely clean, sadly. But hey, at least you can wash it out and don’t have to throw them out. Another sting in your back made you groan as you walked to the bathroom, grabbing the painkillers with shaky hands. You popped three of them in your mouth and swallowed them dry. You knew, that taking so many was not really a good thing but you’ve always been extremely resilient to any form of painmeds, or other forms of intoxication, so you had to take more if you wanted them to help at least a little bit. Yu turned around and leaned on the sink, both hands grabbing the edge of the ceramic as you closed your eyes and let your head roll back. Your stomach rumbled and the corners of your mouth twitched.

_“You should eat something after your shower”_

“Yeah, yeah, I will…” It was so weird, having Chara pop up with you now instead of keeping things secret. And it’s not like they could just leave. Not that you wanted that. You were selfish like that, you didn’t _want_ them to leave and be alone again, even if there would be a way. You hated yourself for that but by now you’ve learned to keep certain emotions just for yourself.  
You stared to shed your clothes and dropped them in complete abandon on the tiled floor. You didn’t have anything to hide from Chara, not anymore. You never did. Once you’ve shared the same body for almost five years, there aren’t many things you can hide from each other.  
And besides that, you two look exactly alike, so it would be just like looking into the mirror for them anyways.  
They glanced at you and you followed their gaze towards your shoulder. It looked red and painful but already partially healed. Charas stitches were sloppy and uneven but they did their job. It wasn’t infected or anything and thanks to Toriels magic-at least, that’s what you guessed-it was already mostly closed, though the scab still tended to break open sometimes and draw blood again. It was such an awkward place for a wound. The gigantic bruise that had formed around it and occupied most of your shoulder and moved up your neck, around the collarbone and a bit down your arm was already a nasty yellow colour, mixed with greens and only sparsely blue or purples mixed into it. Absolutely gross.

More bruises were on your legs and on your arms and you had an especially nasty looking one on your hip, where you fell on the ice. Your rib cage left some bruises on the outside as well but they were almost gone already. Worst thing were your hands though. They were covered in little cuts and scratches and blisters, old scars shining through here and there, their pure white colour so much lighter than your already pale skin. You had a bruise I form of a hand around your left wrist, where one of those punks at Grillby’s had grabbed you and you rubbed it uncomfortable. That one was the most familiar bruise to you and that was disturbing.  
Your face hadn’t been spared either, though it looked better. You only had two cuts, one on your cheek and one above your eyebrow, and a halfway healed bruise on the underside of your jaw where you hit the ice. But your eyes were an intense burgundy red colour, sparking with life and determination, something you had thought lost a long time ago. Even though you looked absolutely wrecked and as if someone had just ran you over with a car-and then put in reverse, ran you over again and then back once more- the new spark in your eyes suited you, as did the cocky smile on your lips.

There was still fire inside you, the flame did not die and it was burning brighter than ever before. Smiling to yourself, you stepped into the sower and turned on the water, immediately playing around with the heat regulator, trying to find that tiny perfect temperature. Showers only seemed to have two settings, the cold icy depths of Arendelle after Elsa threw a hissy fit and the singeing heat of Mt. Doom in the middle of Mordor. After a while you gave up and decided to go for a hot shower, your skin getting flustered from the heat and the painful knots in the your back slowly untwisting. You closed your eyes and stretched towards the water, loving how calming it was. It was a good decision, going for a hot shower instead of cold. And because there might still be a bit of trauma inside of you, you know, after almost drowning under the ice. The thought alone made you shiver.

You didn’t know how long you stood like that, just letting the water drizzle on you and washing away all of the dirt and bad feelings for a moment, as you heard shouting outside. Immediately, you opened your eyes and frowned. You were having a moment of absolute relaxation here, what did they burn now?

Shaking your head, you turned your back to the door and grabbed the shampoo-bottle, squirting some of the lovely chocolate scented goop into your hand and foaming up your reddish-brown hair, quietly humming. When the shouting grew louder again and you heard stomping footsteps approaching-well, you could basically feel them-your frown grew a lot deeper.

“Chara…” you asked slowly, your arms still raised.

 _“Yes?_ ” They seemed just as wary as you were, eyeing the door.

“Did we lock the door?”

 _“Oh gosh darn it…_ ” they managed to whisper just mere seconds before the door bust open with a loud SLAM.

“HUMAN! ARE YOU HURT?” Paprus cried out as he and Undyne charged into the room, Sans close behind them.

“Bro, wait, I don’t think…” He faltered, when he saw you, Chara letting out a weird screech and popping in front of you, arms outspread as if they wanted to shield you from eyes.

“Chara, you are halfway invisible, that ain’t doing jackshaite for my modesty.” You mumbled, surprisingly calm. You were in complete and utter shock. You wanted to scream and dive out of the window again but you couldn’t even move at the moment. Your eyes swept over Sans, his empty, black eyesockets glued onto you and you could have died right here and there, on the spot. The earth could open up and swallow you this second and you would be nothing but grateful.

“NERD, YOU ARE BLEEDING! WHO HURT YOU THIS TIME? WHY DIDN’T YOU CALL FOR HELP?” Undyne screeched accusingly and waved with a piece of black clothing in her hand. Your cheeks flared up with embarrassment.

“Undyne, are those my panties? Where did you get them?”

“uh.. no?” she answered meekly, lowering her arm.

“I WAS DOING THE LAUNDRY AND NOTICED BLOOD ON THEM; HUMAN! I TOLD UNDYNE BECAUSE I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOUR HEALTH!” Oh Papyrus, you poor, innocent little fool.

“Out.” You simply stated, still wanting to die. “Out. All of you. Now!”

“But! The blood…” Undyne sounded so unsure all of a sudden and you stared her down.

“I said out! Now! I’ll be with you in a hot minute!” you growled.

“BUT…”

“ _OUT_!”

“Uh, yeah, let’s go…” Sans hastily chimed in, grabbing the two of them by the elbow. His complete skull was covered in a blue spread.

“BUT BROTHER, THEY ARE HURT?”

“Yeah, I’m sure they are fine for the next five minutes, okay?”

“BUT…”

“No, he’s right, let’s go!” Undyne hurried. “I don’t want a knife in my back, I can wait.” They were just about to leave, as you cleared your throat.

“My… Laudry please, Undyne.” You said in an emotionless tone and she nodded.

“Oh. Sure. Of course. I’ll just…. Uh… Put it with the rest!”

And as quickly as they came, they were gone again, door slamming behind them and Papyrus still stammering in confusion. You took a deep breath and hat to sit down in the shower for a second.

“Chara.”

 _“Yes.”_ They sat down with you, staring just as blankly at the door as you were.

“Please kill me.”

“ _Only if you kill me._ ”

 

 

You were sitting at the kitchen table in complete silence, a heating bottle on your lap and a cup of hot chocolate in front of you.

“I know how much Chara liked chocolate and since you are basically one, I figured…” Toriel had said as she placed it in front of you, a shy smile on her face. It only stung a little bit.

The whipped cream on top of it had already dissolved into the hot liquid, just a few, sad, rainbow-coloured sprinkles were left, calmly floating on top. The three culprits were sitting across the room. If it weren’t for your fuzzy pyjamas and your still wet and slightly dripping hair, you would feel like a principal or mother, scolding three children. Chara was pacing behind you. They were just as comfortable as you were. God, you really did feel like a couple with their bunch of misbehaving children right now. But okay, you’ve always been that Mom-friend.

“So….” You started, the word drawn out and eyes still on your cup. “Uhm. This is awkward.”

“ _Very awkward_.”

“But uh… I can assure you, I am in no way harmed.”

 _“More than yesterday night at least”_ You turned around to Chara with wide eyes.

“Not helping.”

“ _Sorry.”_ Shaking your head, you turned back to the others.

“I’m flattered, that you worry so much, but I am fine.”

“But you were bleeding!” Undyne protested, obviously overwhelmed. “I mean, yeah, sorry that I stole your lingerie but there was _blood_ on it!”

“First of all, I washed it out! It wasn’t all that much and..”

“THERE WAS MORE?” You pinched the bridge of your nose and sighed.

“Not that much Papyrus. But I promise you, I am perfectly okay.”

“Since when is any amount blood ‘perfectly okay’, I have to ask that?” Sans asked and you rolled your eyes.

“It would be very much not okay if I didn’t, actually. I know, you boys probably have no idea about the female reproduction system but Undyne here might understand, but yeah, I actually bleed once a month.”

“You what.” Undyne’s voice was flat and you furrowed your brow.

“You… don’t?” She was just slowly shaking her head. And you turned your head to look at Chara. “She doesn’t?” They grimaced and shook their head.

_“Nope. Uh… Monsters and humans reproduce differently.”_

“But Toriel understood, so I thought…”

_“Mom knows everything about humans. But she doesn’t either…”_

“Oh golly, this is so weird then…” You mumbled. “Do I really have to give them the talk?”

_“Do you want me to?”_

“God no, you have _no_ shame!”

_“Then you have to do it or this will just get worse.”_

“Wait a second, you bleed. Every month?” Undyne gasped.

“Yes, for a whole week. Until I’m like… I don’t know… 50? 60? Chara, when does the menopause start?”

“ _I dunno, Laney, I died when I was 16_.”

“Sorry.” You whispered and awkwardly smacked your lips together, so they made a pop-sound. Terror was written all over Undynes and Papyrus’ face, Sans eyes were once again completely black and empty, a sight, that made your heart sink.

“Humans are so weird.” Undyne muttered.

“How are you still alive?” Sans was just as quiet and you snorted. “Don’t laugh, bleeding for a whole week sounds pretty serious.”

“It actually isn’t. I get cramps when it’s _really_ bad and all emotional and crave unhealthy food, but that’s it. It’s part of puberty. Humans, uh… How do monsters reproduce?” You shot a quick glance at Papyrus and leaned forward, talking to Sans in a hushed voice. “Wait, can I talk about that while he is here, right? Or is that diminishing his fragile innocence as well?”

“OF COURSE HUMAN! I ALREAD KNOW THAT! MONSTERS SHARE PIECES OF THEIR SOULS AND CREATE A NEW ONE THAT WAY! MONSTER CHILDREN ARE CREATED OUT OF LOVE!” You blink at Papyrus, your mouth agape and rapidly blinking. You crook your neck at Chara, they were rubbing their arms and stared at the floor.

_“It’s okay, I’ve felt the same way when I found out.”_

“They are all wanted?”

 _“Monsters are made of love and compassion. They are not as cruel as us humans, buttercup. They could never abandon a child._ ” You nodded, sadness still on your face.

“WHY ARE YOU SAD, HUMAN?”

“You know, when… When humans… get older, their bodies change. And when two people uh… how do I say this… reproduce? No, not realy…”

“HAVE SEX?”

“Papyrus!” you almost looked offended.

“He might be innocent but he is not four years old, nerd. We’re all adults here, spit it out.” You blushed heavily.

“So yeah, well, when humans reach a certain age and have sex, they can get pregnant if they don’t use protection.”

“BY ACCIDENT?” Undyne’s voice was shrill and made your ears ring.

“Yes, by accident. And… And there are some people, that don’t want children, but accidents happen and suddenly they are pregnant. And…” You chew your lip. “And sometimes, it doesn’t really happen out of love. There are humans, that are very very cruel and force themselves upon others. Sex can be a wonderful thing if you share it with someone you love but since it is a humans most vulnerable state, it can be also used against them, as a form of torture and…” You shivered and rubbed your arms, nails scratching over the skin.

“Hey, it’s alright, you don’t have to continue speaking. I think we can all imagine what it means.” Sans interrupted you and you smiled at him gratefully. Suddenly, Undyne slammed her hands on the table and jumped up, anger twisting her face.

“Wait a second. Is that was that complete prick did to you?” You took in a shaky breath, not knowing what to say until you nodded quietly. The blue fish growled loudly, her yellow eye narrowed and her sharp teeth were showing. “I’m gonna kill him.”

“Undyne no, please. It’s over and…” You licked your lips, not knowing how to continue.

“WHY HAVEN’T YOU TOLD US, HUMAN?”

“I… It’s not something, I like talking about. I might be a victim but I don’t like being victimised. Besides that, I tried telling other people but it didn’t help.”

“WHY?” You just stared at the hot chocolate, watched one of the sprinkles, now white since it colour got washed away already, float around for a while until it got so soaked that it started to sink.

_“Tell them.”_

“No.”

_“Then I will. I don’t care if they are going to kill him or not, he’s had it coming.” Chara snapped and stared at them. “I begged her to go to someone. So she went and tried to speak to one of her so called “friends” about it. You wanna know what they did? They congratulated her, after all, they’ve been in a relationship with that- I can’t say monster, since those are actually nice and decent-that thing for quite a while. Then we went to the police. They just laughed, after all, are we sure, that we didn’t enjoy it? We must have invited him somehow. Humans are despicable!”_

“Chara, stop.” You said softly, smiling to yourself. “It is over. And we are away from him and he can’t harm us in any way anymore.”

_“But…”_

“No but. Let it rest for now. He isn’t worth your anger.”

_“Elaine!”_

“No, I said it’s enough.”

“How are you doing this?” Undyne whispered, shock was written all over her face. “How do you stay so calm, after all that’s happened?” You smiled at her, it was a warm and friendly one, sadness only ever so slightly tugging at the corners.

“I drink a lot of Tea. And I keep fighting. He has no more power over me and I know that it wasn’t my fault. And I have you guys now, that’s more I could ever ask for.” You were in the middle of your sentence, when you were pulled out of your seat and into a tight hug from Papyrus. “W-Woah!”

“YOU ARE VERY BRAVE HUMAN! AND I PROMISE YOU, THAT WE WILL WORK VERY HARD TO KEEP YOU SAFE FROM THAT MAN. HE WON’T HURT YOU AGAIN!” You smiled and patted his back.

“I know Papyrus. And I am very thankful for that.” He put you down again and you smiled up at him. God, you felt so small next to the towering skeleton but also somewhat safe.

“I have one more question!” Undyne shouted, her brows furrowed.

“Yes?”

“Will Frisk start to get their period too?” You frowned for a second, thinking about your answer.

“That is a really good question, Undyne, but I have to be honest, I don’t know. You know, not all humans get their periods just the gals, and yeah… This might be a very stupid question but it just never appeared as important to me but… What was Frisk born as? I know they prefer gender neutral terms but… Yeah… ”

“A HUMAN OF COURSE!” You giggled at the answer and quietly facepalmed. Oh, Papyrus was still as naïve and innocent as ever.

“No, I mean…” You winced uncomfortably. “What’s down their pants?” It was silent for a moment, no one seemed to have the right answer.

“I don’t know, Determination?” Undyne suggested and you burst out in a fit of laughter.

“Oh my god, and you call _me_ the dork here!” You were gasping for air “Okay, since no one really knows and it’s technically none of our business, I guess we just have to wait.”

“Humans are weird.”

“Isn’t unfair that just the girls start to bleed?” Sans asked and you immediately nodded.

“Yes very and I am sure that every girl out there will agree with me!”

“ _They do_!” Chara said. “ _By the way, you dropped the heating pad_.”

“What? Oh…” As you bowed down to pick up the heating bottle from the floor, pain made you gasp and hunch over in agony, your face scrunched up. “Ow, ow, ow…”

“You alright there, buddo?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, just one of those cramps, I told you earlier…”

“You didn’t seem to have them ever before…”

“ _That’s because her body is getting accustomed to being somewhat healthy again. That bastard has put her through a lot.”_ Chara growled while stabilising you, their hand on your lower back to ease your pain. You straightened up again, pulling your legs onto the chair with you and placing the still hot bottle back in your lap. You finally took a sip from the hot chocolate. It was delicious, just like you expected, even though it was already a tad too cold, but that was your fault.

“WHY DOES THAT EFFECT HER… BLEEDING?”

“It’s called period, Paps…” you sighed. “Or shark week. Or whatever other ridiculous pun or metaphor you can make up.” You let out a small chuckle. “Well, back when I was with Hugh, I didn’t eat enough and lost a lot of blood due to…” you gestured to your wrists and grimaced. “My body simply didn’t have the energy to produce a lot of blood I can afford to lose. Sometimes I didn’t get my period at all, and…” Memories started to flood back into your mind, the first time you didn’t get your period and how scared you were. There were so many tears, so much fear. You were so afraid, that he actually had gotten you pregnant. The thought made you shiver and tears started dwelling up in your eyes. Oh god, you couldn’t bear the thought of a child being born into this horrible scenario. It would tie you to him forever. Or would he even let you keep it? If he wouldn’t he would never go public with it, to get rid of it. He’d probably beat you until…  
Your breathing started to speed up and suddenly you were back at that house, back with him and remembered all of those pregnancy scares you had. The thought of him touching you made you wanna vomit and curl up in a ball. You remembered the first time it happened, how you sat in the horrible, tasteless black marble bathtub, crying your eyes and tried to rub your skin off to get his scent and his touches off you until you started to bleed. No one believed you, you were alone with this, maybe they were right, maybe it was your fault that…

You covered your face with your hands and placed your forehead against the cool surface of the table, shaking so much and your vision clouded by tears.

“H-Hey-What’s wrong? Is that another cramp?” You could hear Undyne’s footsteps as she charged around the table, you just didn’t recognise it as your fish friend, all you did was hear approaching, determined steps. Instinctively, you bolted from your chair, knocking it over in the process and scooting over to the wall, crouching on the floor.

“Please don’t hurt me, I am sorry!” you whimpered.

 _“Oh no…”_  Chara whispered and scooted closer, without touching you.

“WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM?” You were quietly sobbing, still trembling like a leaf.

 _“It’s… This is what happens when humans do something terrible to one another. She’s having a panic attack right now.”_ Chara scooted a bit closer again, gently toughing your knee, watching your reaction. When you didn’t respond badly, they put their arms around you, quietly cooing at you. _“Hey, it’s alright, you are okay. He can’t hurt you anymore.”_ They looked at the others _. “When humans don’t get their periods, it can mean that they pregnant. Imagining that must have brought back some bad memories. She tries very hard to be okay but the truth is that he messed her up. Pretty badly that is…”_ You would have hated with how much pity they looked at you but you were a tad preoccupied at the moment. That is, until Sans came over and just sat next to you, grabbing one of your hands.

“Hey, count with me, okay? Ten… Nine…Eight…” Your breathing stopped for a second before it continued, this time a lot slower and mumbling could be heard from you. “Thata boy, you’re doing really well… Three… Two… One… Two… Three…” he counted with you back up to ten and then down, over and over until you calmed down enough to blink at him, still shaking but at least able to talk now.

“I-I am sorry… That was.. pathetic.” You smiled weakly.

“It’s okay, kiddo. I know how it is.” You stared at him, studying his face for a while before speaking up again.

“Sans. I am so. So sorry for what happened during genocide. Don’t say it wasn’t my fault because it was. Just as much as Charas. We are… There is no clear line of separation between us so I am just as guilty as them. And I know that nothing can make it up to you but I am sorry. You didn’t deserve any of that.” He just chuckled and wiped a tear from your cheek with his thumb. You instinctively nuzzled closer into the touch, closing your eyes for a second.

“Just like you don’t deserve what happened to you. But those times are over now. So we should make the best of it.” You gave him a sad smile.

“Maybe I did, for everything that happened and…” He cupped your cheeks with his hands and forced you to look at him.

“No, you didn’t. No one does. You are not guilty of anything, no matter what he made you think. It is not your fault, you hear me?” You could do nothing but nod.

You didn’t believe him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Determination! Poor Elaine, I really wanna hug the sweet baby sometimes
> 
> I tried so hard to make this fluff.... But it didn't work. And this is just so painfully good in a explanatory way. Because character development n shit. I AM SORRY. I TRIED.


	27. Momageddon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And you guys thought that I was done with the PTA....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MUMMY IS SICK, MY CHILDREN, I AM SORRY. PLEASE BE GENTLE, I AM A FRAGILE FLOWERCHILD ATM

**[Bonehead ;) ] 13:27pm**

**Sup. you still at work?**

The message from Sans made your lips curl up into a broad smile and you immediately picked up your phone to text back.

**[Laney] 13:27pm**

**Naw, Metta sent me home early m8, hes got some weird PR stuff to do 4 christmas. Im at Moms rn, working on my thesis.**

 

**[Laney] 13:28pm**

**Miss Toriel***

 

**[Laney] 13:28pm**

**That was weird**

 

**[Laney] 13:28pm**

**Pretend that never happened**

 

**[Bonehead ;) ] 13:30pm**

**Wow, you really are some typ-o kinda girl**

 

**[Laney] 13:31pm**

**How dare you speak in that tone of pun to me, young man.**

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 13:32pm**

**I can feel you grinning**

 

**[Laney] 13:32pm**

**I AM NOT AND I HATE IT WHAT GAVE IT AWAY???**

 

**[Bonehead ;) ] 13:33pm**

**You love my puns**

 

**[Laney] 13:34pm**

**Oh fuck me me sideways**

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 13:36pm**

**That an invitation?**

 

**[Laney] 13:40pm**

**Goodbye Sans.**

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 13:42pm**

**Don’t fibula, that was smooth**

 

**[Laney] 13:42pm**

**See that period @ the end of the sentence?**

 

**[Laney] 13:42pm**

**It indicates that I am done with this kind of conversation**

 

**[Laney] 13:42pm**

**.**

 

**[Laney] 13:47pm**

**And yes, it was terribly smooth.**

 

**[Bonehead ;) ] 13:50pm**

**dork**

 

**[Laney] 13:50pm**

**OH SHUDDUP U GODDAMN TWAT, I SWEAR 2 GOD!**

 

Your face was completely flush by now as you put your phone down and stared back at the bright screen of the Laptop.

 _“Soooo~”_  Chara stated, the word drawn out to an incredible amount and a teasing grin spread across your face

 “So?”

_“What’s gotten your bones so rattled? A good message?”_

“Don’t act like you don’t already know. I am sure you took at least a few peaks!” You growled at their sickeningly sweet tone.

 _“What? Me? Never! I am spooked right out of my body that you would even assume such a thing in the first place!”_  They sounded so playfully offended and you just growled something incoherent, burying yourself with your work again. “ _So, what did he want?”_

“Nothing, making some stupid puns again.”

_“And what did you do?”_

“Embarrass myself”

_“As usual.”_

“Go fuck yourself!”

_“I would but I have no body!”_

“And you sure as fuck aint using mine…” you murmured and Chara snorted.

_“Ba-dm-tss”_

“Honestly, now that you and Sans don’t have to hate each other anymore, I can see you two become best friends. You have the same kind of absolutely disgusting humour!”

_“Yeah, but you love it.”_

“Oh shuddup.” You mumbled a bit awkwardly, blushing again.

_“Are you gonna text him back?”_

“No, because I ended the conversation. With a period.”

_“Rude. And also a lie.”_

“No, I swear, I’m not gonna…” You couldn’t tell them what you wouldn’t do, as your phone’s screen lit up again this instance, a lovely ring echoing through the living room. Immediately, you were scrambling to grab it, only stopping when you heard the chirping giggle of the ghostly appearance next to you on the couch.

_“Oh, I can totally see that you aren’t…”_

“Don’t you dare say one more thing!” Chara just snickered and you glared at them.

_“Was that a custom ringone for him, by the way?”_

“I thought I asked you to kindly shut the fuck up, didn’t I?”

 _“Oh, don’t be such a buzzkill, what did he say?”_  They stretched their ethereal body around you to look at the screen and you blushed.

“N-Nothing, he just…” Letting out a sigh, you turned your screen to show them the message.

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 14:02pm**

**Yeah, what I wanted to ask, ya wanna go nd grab a bite after my shift’s done?**

 

Chara let out a squeal and you swatted at them.

_“He asked you out! Oh wait until I tell Undyne!”_

“Shuddup, Toriel is gonna hear you! You ain’t telling anyone either, eejit!” you hissed. “And I hate when you look right through me!”

_“Welcome to my world, buttercup!”_

“Oh, you are terrible!”

 _“Yeah, yeah, I know. What are you gonna say?”_  You thought about it for a moment, biting your lip as you were lost in thought, before carefully typing out your response.

 

**[Laney] 14:06pm**

**Sure. Can’t somach much of Paps glitter anyway atm.**

 

**[Laney] 14:07pm**

**Stomach***

 

**[Laney] 14:08pm**

**Grillby’s?**

 

The minutes were crawling by ant agonisingly slow as both Chara and you were staring at your phone, barely even blinking and breathing shallow. Then, after what felt like an eternity, your screen lit up again.

**[Bonehead ;)] 14:16pm**

**Great, I’ll pick you up at sex.**

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 14:16pm**

**Six***

 

**[Laney] 14:17pm**

**You did that on purpose.**

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 14:18pm**

**Maybe?**

 

**[Laney] 14:20pm**

**Goodbye Sans.**

 

**[Laney] 14:20pm**

**See you at sex ;)**

 

**[Bonehead] 14:32pm**

**You.**

 

**[Bonehead ;)] 14:32pm**

**are a cruel woman.**

Your face must resemble a brick now and you muffled a groan while Chara snickered.

“Shuddup now! Help me with my thesis!”

_“Okay, okay, bring it on then!”_

“Thanks, ugh, I hate quantum physics.”

_“I know but you have half a thesis done and then you’ll never have to look at it again. You were the one that didn’t want to be a college dropout!”_

“I know, because you know just how cool it would be if I’d be a doctor.”

_“You can be so weird.”_

“I know, but whatever. Lemme have this.” You sighed and turned back to the computer and moved the mouse to get rid of the screensaver. “How does that sound: “ _In fact, the mere act of opening the box will determine the state of the cat, although in this case there were three determinate states the cat could be in: these being Alive, Dead, and Bloody Furious.”_  That good?”

“Nope, way too casual or like you ripped it right out of a Wikipedia article.” Groaning you pressed the delete-key on your keypad.

“Okay, right, what would you do instead?”

 _“Try this one: “_ In the world of the very small, where particle and wave aspects of reality are equally significant, things do not behave in any way that we can understand from our experience of the everyday world...all pictures are false, and there is no physical analogy we can make to understand what goes on inside atoms. Atoms behave like atoms, nothing else.” _Better?”_

“A lot!” You stared at them, typing as fast as you can. “Honestly, you are way better at this than I am, you should study this instead.” You could see them blushing, even though they averted their eyes.

 _“Oh, shuddup and finish this up.”_  You rolled your eyes and kept typing, quietly humming along to the musical that was on TV, Chara was watching. You could hear Toriel talk on the phone in the hallway and smiled to yourself. This felt so domestic and made you all fuzzy and warm on the inside. God, never ever would you want to give up the life you had right now.

The soft smile was still on your face, as the glassdoor to the living room rattled and the pretty goat monster entered the room, looking especially concerned. Immediately, your smile turned into a frown.

“What’s wrong, Miss Toriel?”

“That was Frisks school, they have asked me to pick them up immediately. I am worried that something has happened to them. But I am already late for my meeting with the mayor to discuss the new laws and regulations concerning monster integrations. I am so torn since my child is the most important thing to me but missing this would have grave consequences for my subjects, which I simply can’t allow.” Her voice was soft as always but obviously strained. Chara turned their head towards you, a questioning expression on their face and you shrugged, nodding at them.

_“Hey, how about we pick them up, Mom?”_

“Oh no, I can’t burden you with such a task, my children. I-I will manage somehow, please don’t worry, you have things to do yourself.” You closed your laptop and sat up from your lying position on the couch, placing it on the coffee table.

“Ah, whatever, I am not getting anywhere anyways. Metta gave me his company car, so I can just hop over and pick them up. That way I can watch them too. We’d be glad to help out, Miss Toriel. After all, you let us stay here as well.”

“Oh, but of course.” She came over and nuzzled both of your cheeks. Well, she tried, her fuzzy hand hovered over Charas just about but the intention was there. “You two are just the sweetest, are you sure, this won’t be a problem.”

_“Not as long as I won’t have to drive.”_

“Don’t worry, I letting them behind the wheel, Miss Toriel. I promise.” You got up and stretched, until the bones in your back popped. “I’ll head right out, yes? Oh, and I’ll be with Sans tonight, so I’ll leave some food for you and Frisk on the stove. If you aren’t back by then, I’ll get someone to watch them.” You smiled at her and she reciprocated.

“Thinking about everything at once, as always my dear.” Laughing you patted against the side of your head.

“Benefits of having two brains.”  She laughed again and you head out together. You didn’t bother putting on your coat and just threw it in the back carelessly, seeing how the heating system in the car was top of the line. It was MTT brand after all.

Frisks school wasn’t far from the cosy house they were living in, normally you’d walk there but since it was freezing outside, you preferred the short carried there.

The building looked just like any other school, you’d imagine, pale yellow walls and a playground in the back.

Carefully, you got out of the car, shivering at the cool temperatures, now grabbing you black blazer from the back seat. You put it on over the white silk blouse you were wearing as you were walking towards the building. Snickering to yourself, you thought that you would make quite the fly entry, lookin all dress up with our black dress pants, the fitting blazer and the lovely blouse with the black ribbon around the collar. You didn’t have to look nice, but it felt appropriate when working with Mettaton, he always looked like a peeled egg anyways. Smiling, you tucked one strand of hair behind your ear, the heels of your shoes clicking in the empty hallways. You climbed up the stairs to the office and entered the secretary’s office. The woman behind the desk had her gray hair up in a stern bun and her lips were puckered, as if she’d just bitten into a lemon.

“Good day, how may I help you?” Her tone was off, as if she seemed annoyed by your presence and she straightened her halfmoon glasses, still not looking at you.

“Heya, I’m here to pick up Frisk. Frisk Dreemurr, you don’t happen to have any idea where they are? Did something happen?”

“Dreemurr, Dreemurr…” she muttered and looked at her notes. “Ah, right here. They are waiting at the principal’s office, just down the hallway and then left. You can’t miss it.”

“Principal?” You asked, taken aback. “Why are they at the principal’s?” She let out a noise that was half huff and half chuckle and she instantly reminded you of Umbridge, a very tall and lanky Umbridge.

“I am sorry, you will have to talk to him yourself, Mrs….?”

“Miss, please. And you can call me Elaine.” She furrowed her eyebrows and finally, she looked at you. When her eyes met yours, you could see her getting pale as a sheet. You were used to having that effect on other people. A sickeningly sweet smile spread across your face but you were sure that it was also the most menacing thing that poor woman had seen all day. “I’ll be heading out now. Let’s just hope ‘t won’t be any trouble, will we?” To your absolute delight, you saw a shiver run down her spine and without another word, you turned again and headed out, your steps long and determined, the echo now louder than before. You walked down the hallway, just like the secretary’s told you and immediately spotted Frisk, sitting on one of the chairs, head down. Next to them was another child that was oddly familiar to you. As soon as they spotted you, they jumped up and ran towards you. Frisk crashed into you, their tiny arms around your waist and face buried against your chest.

“Hey there, kiddo. What’s going on. Your Mom got a call but she couldn’t make it. Did ya break anything?” They didn’t lift their head, still pressed against your chest-well, understandable; you did have a very nice and huggable set there.

“Mum messed up again, they have it out for Frisk.” The boy explained and you narrowed your eyes at him.

“Aren’t you that bully I had to lecture a while back?” He just grinned a crooked grin and shrugged apologetic.

“Yeah, but Frisk and me are Pal’s now. They are actually pretty cool.”

 **Yeah, he keeps the bullies away now actually.**  Frisk signed and you bit your lip at the tiny blush that was spreading across their cheeks.

“Oh does he now?” you drawled and laughed. “But okay, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. Billy it was, right?” The boy just nodded and you smiled at him. “What are you still doing here anyways? You in trouble too?”

“Nope. Mom was supposed to pick me up after soccer training but she forgot. So I stayed behind to pay Frisk some company until their parents are gonna show before walking.”

“Walking? Boy it’s freezing outside!”

“It’s not that far, honestly.” He mumbled and you felt yourself soften up.

“Ya know what, I can give ya a lift. I feel like I need to exchange a few words with your Mum anyways.”

“Cool! You’re the best, Miss Dreemurr!” His eyes sparkled and you snorted.

“Dude, what gives you the idea that I am a Dreemurr?”

“Well, you do look like Frisk but older. And you go those awesome red eyes.”

“Sorry to burst your bubble, but that’s just coincidence.”

“That’s a huuuge one!” His eyes were all round and excited and Frisk giggled, still hugging you close.

“Yeah, I’ve heard that one before. I’m just… staying with their uncles. But say, what did your mom do?”

“They made Frisk go quiet hands again.” Billy shuffled, his eyes averted and Frisk pressed their face against you again, gripping you a smidgen tighter.

“Quiet hands?”

“Y-Yeah. Uhm…” He seemed so uncomfortable in this situation. “They wanted to stop Frisk to sign, since  _they are just disturbing the others_  in her eyes and grabbed their hands, kinda forcing them under the table.” The poor boy mumbled, obviously disapproving of his mothers actions.

“ _She did what_?” you couldn’t tell which one said that, you or Chara. But it might have just been both of you.

“Y-Yeah. She doesn’t get why they just won’t talk.” Your mind went completely white for a second, shock obviously written all across your face. You had to blink rapidly to get yourself back together, just as the door of the office opened. A middleaged man stood in the frame, a smug look on his face, that said  _“I am better than anyone else and I know it_ ”. It was the kind of person that would easily abuse his seat of power.

You hated him instantly.

Now smiling, you grabbed the carkeys and handed them to Frisk.

“Hey, why don’t you guys. Just go ahead. And wait in the car for me?” The children just nodded carefully, frisk more vary that Billy, who just seemed excited.

**Okay.**

“Man Frisk, your aunt is sooooo cool and badass!” you heard him whisper as the two of them shuffled along. The child that looked so similar to you turned their head to watch you for a second, before smiling.

**You have no idea!**

You looked back to the principal, still smiling and watched him flinch at your eyes, like everyone usually does.

“Shall we proceed then?” He nodded sharply and you entered the office with the same stern steps your aunt had, showing off an aura of authority and respect. True authority and respect, not the fake one this prick over here gave off. You sat down at the desk, nodding at him to sit down, turning the game around the second you were in his domain, and instantly making clear  _who_  was the one in control right now. He stretched out his hand and you gripped it in a hard and short handshake.

“I am glad you could come, Miss…?”

“Elaine, please”

 “I have to admit, you are not who we expected. We called Frisks mother to pick them up. How do I gain the honour of meeting you here now?”

“Their mother was in an important meeting with the major to discuss political matters. I am sure you can see that this had priority. And I am fully capable of handling this.”

“Oh, I am sure you are, Miss Elaine.” He cleared his throat and straightened his horn-rimmed glasses. “But to speak of the matter at hand, it came to my attention by a concerned parent who was substituting todays classes, that Frisk keeps disturbing the lessons. I know, the kid is very busy all the time, since they are the ambassador between the human kind and monsters and we’ve already kindly accepted their request to be named by their non-binary pronouns but we just can’t allow such behaviour, no matter who it is. This school stands for a high quality education and…”

“I’m sorry, but do you know how it feels to have your mouth sewn shut?” you interrupted him, your fingers interwinded, elbows places on the ebony table and chin resting on top of your hands, still smiling. He blinked in confusion.

“Uhm-No-I don’t actually, but this is not the subject at matter right now.”

“Oh, it actually is. It feels painful. You know what is even worse. Being forced to speak while feeling like your throat is being shred to pieces?” You leaned closer, a threatening look on your face. “This is what you are doing by forcing these so called “quiet hands!” upon them. You are making them unable to communicate and if, it is basically painful to them. You are punishing them for not speaking  _while taking the ability to speak from them_.” Your words were barely a hiss and you leaned back. The man was substantially taller than you but you still managed to look down at him.

“Miss Elaine, I know this must be upsetting but we just can’t… We need to know-”

“If we are going to press charges because a grown up adult touched our child inappropriately? No, I won’t for now but if you are ever going to let something like that happen again, I will make sure that you lose your job and end up behind bars, just like that woman.”

“Miss, please calm down, this is a serious matter and some hefty accusations you are making there, you can’t possible mean that!” His face was pale and he was obviously uncomfortable shifting in his seat. You raised one eyebrow and simply bowed down to grab your purse from your bag, grabbing a single coin. Very slowly and deliberately, you leaned across the table and placed it on the wood with an audible  _click_  that echoed through the office, a terrifying smile on your face. He stared at it in confusion before looking up at you. You crossed your arms and threw one of your legs over the other one elegantly. “If this is an attempt to bribe me, I am sorry to tell you that this won’t work.” He glanced down for a second. “Especially with such a little amount.”

“You might want to look at it again. I am giving you a chance here” You smiled a bid wider as he picked up the coin and starring at it intensely. As he spotted the embellished dragon on one side and the bold, crossed knifes on the other one, he immediately dropped it with a sharp hiss, fear in his eyes. “Say, would you like to know my name? Since I’ve heard multiple people mix me up with Frisks sibling?” He was trembling now, to your pleasure. You leaned closer, your voice dropping. “My name is Elaine Asra Winters.”

“You don’t mean…”

“I take that you’ve already heard of my aunt. She is quite fond of the child. I am sure she would be  _incredibly_  upset if she’d got to hear of something like this happening again.” You stood up in one swift motion, smiling at him and snatching the coin back. “I am glad we had this talk. I am looking forward to meeting you again. This is a great chance for you” You gave him a small nod as if he’d be dismissed and strode out of the room. The door behind you clicked and you finally let out your breath and slumped over a bit. You felt Chara pop up next to you and made a meek attempt to smile at them. They were just staring at you with an open mouth.

_“What. Was that?”_

“I don’t know?”

 _“Do you have any idea how scary you can be sometimes? Laney,_ I _was terrified of you!”_

“Don’t say stuff like that…” you mumbled but they were simply shaking their head.

_“You wouldn’t send your aunt and her brutes after him, would you?”_

“No, of course not. I was just scaring him and giving him a piece of my mind. Maybe he’ll learn. And he is just a minor problem, I still need to make Helen realise what a gigantic twat she is…”

_“Yeah, but she’s been cruising for a bruising for quite some time now.”_

“True…” you sighed and started walking again, casually tossing the coin into the air and catching it over and over. It was probably the most valuable kind of currency out there, as it was literally worth a life. The mafia had used them for ages and you still felt a bit safer carrying one around ever since you’ve got that one when you were 13 years old. God, you were so young.

The hasty pitter-patter of feet made you look up, and you furrowed your brows, as you saw Frisk run towards you.

“Hey, what’s going on? Why aren’t you at the car?” They looked thoroughly rattled and you were immediately alarmed.

 **It’s Billy! He slipped on the ice outside and is hurt! I think his arm is broken!**  You let out an irish swear and picked up Frisk before breaking into a sprint outside. The boy was sitting in the snow, sobbing and pressing his arm against his chest in an odd angle.

“Darn it, Frisk, go unlock the car.” You put them down and they nodded, sprinting off. You hurried over to Billy, crouching in front of him. He was pale as a sheet and tears were rolling down his cheeks, leaving them stained. “Billy? Hey, I know it hurts, but we are going to get you help.” You tried to sooth him but he lust let out a gargling sound. “Can I pick you up? We have to get to the car!” He sobbed again but nodded meekly and you grabbed him carefully, walking as fast as possible, while trying to keep him relatively pain free. Frisk was already at the car and opened the backseat for you, sliding in and putting the seatbelt. You sat the boy down next to them and looked them into the eyes. “Put on his seatbelt, be careful with his arm” You didn’t wait for their response but rather walked around to the driver’s seat, letting the engine roaring up. You made a u-turn, perfectly in control over the vehicle and nestling around your pocket, pulling out your phone.

_“Where are we going, hospital?”_

“God no, public hospitals are the worse and one of those interns is bound to make his injury worse.”

 _“Then where are we going?”_  You scrolled through your contacts and pressed the call button when you found the right number, jamming it between your ear and your shoulder as it was ringing.

“ ’ello?” a familiar, warm voice came from the other side and you gripped the wheel hard enough that your knuckles would turn white.  

“Hey, it’s me. I need your address.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah, actually I'm gonna split this one up and upload the 2nd part tomorrow. This is so ridiculously long.


	28. Motherpocalipse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> YEAH, U GO ELAINE!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like dying but the still doesn't keep me from writing for you guys!

You were standing in the corner of the clinical room, Frisk in your Arms and nervously biting your lips, as you watched Curly finishing the cast on Billy’s arm. She had her curled her up in a tick ponytail, and glasses on her nose. Her fingers were sliding over the damp material to smooth it out and talked to the child in a hushed voice, calming him down and smiling.

Your head was hurting so much again and you pressed your eyes together to make it go away, with moderate success though. Frisk had their head at the crook of your neck, rubbing their eyes from time to time.

“So, all done up, pequeño.” Curly chirped and clapped into your hands. “You’ve been very brave!” Billy grinned broadly and waved his cast at Frisk.

“Hey, look Frisk! Don’t I look absolutely badass!” The kid wriggled in your grip and you put them down. Their feet didn’t even touch the ground before they ran off like lightning, already signing away. A lopsided smile appeared on your face as you watched them. Seriously, how did they manage to have absolutely everyone fall in love with them? But honestly, who couldn’t adore the kid?

“You didn’t tell me that you ‘ave a child, mera!” Your childhood friend stepped next to you, talking in their usual soft and thick voice, your eyebrows slowly arching upwards.

“I just turned 23. When did I give birth? 12 years down the line? Curly, you _knew_ me back then!” She just chuckled.

“They could be yours though. But you act a lot like you did with Lizzy while back.”

“Wow, thanks for bringing back those sweet mems!”

“I am sorry,dearie. It’s just…” She sighed. “It’s nothing. I don’t even know what I wanted to say.” You turned towards her, a broad grin on your face.

“Liar.”

“You still know me too well, Ellie Bean.”

“No, you are just still the worst liar out there”

“You are still just as charming as before.”

“That’s what you love me for.”

“Yeah, alright, true.” She chuckled quietly, before burrowing her hands in the pockets of her labcoat. “Say, what did you say happened to his arm?”

“I don’t really know? Frisk said he slipped on the ice while they were playing.” She nodded quietly. “Why.”

“Oh, nothing, really….”

“That wasn’t a question. Why.” She shuddered.

“I hate when you get like that, you are almost scarily intimidating.”

“I am 5”1 on good days, what is intimidating about me?”

“Size doesn’t matter” You snorted and muttered something along the lines of “Yeah sure, it doesn’t for you” and she shot you a short glance. “You know what I mean. You can be very stern and menacing, when you are being upset. And I know you will be upset.”

“Why would I be upset.”

“Promise you won’t be upset?”

“Only if you tell me!”

“Fine!”

“Okay, promise!” She sighed and kneaded her hands.

“He has some strange bruises.” You immediately furrowed your brows.

“Strange like…”

“Like the ones you used to have!” You pushed back your shoulders and cocked your head. “Oh no.”

“Hmh?”

“You are upset!

“I am not”

“You are.”

“I promised you, I wouldn’t get upset.” For a moment it was quiet between you too. “I am mad however.” She threw her hands into the air.

“You are so predictable sometimes, you and your wicked sense of preservation and justice!”

“Oh shuddup. I’m just gonna talk to his mom for a bit. I need to head over anyways since she didn’t make friends when she forced something called “Quiet Hands” upon Frisk.” You turned towards her with a scowl. “Did you know that exists? How backwards are some people?”

“Don’t hurt her!”

“I a pacifist, Curly, I am offended, that you’d assume something like that!”

“I know you are but your family isn’t.”

“That’s in the past and you know it!” you hissed and she rolled her eyes.

“Just be careful. I don’t want to call the authorities, not before you talked to his mom-it can be more effective.”

“Yeah, fine, whatever. Just like high school, always pushing me ahead to avoid uncomfy situations!”

“Oh don’t act like that. You enjoy pretending to be badass and all hard and edgy!”

“I do not pretend!” She pinched your cheeks and you groaned.

“Of course you do! You pretend being hardcore but on the inside you are still the mushy little sap that cried during Captain America!”

“BUCKY FELL OFF A TRAIN, I HAD EVERY RIGHT TO CRY!” She just giggled and you pouted as your hair was ruffled. “Don’t “You’re cure” me now, Miss Cantabella! You should fear me, you hear? Fear me!”

“I’ll fear you when you stop watching Barbie Movies as a guilty pleasure!” You swatted at her.

“Shhhhhhhhhhht, you absolute twat! Don’t say that so loud!” you hissed at her and your voice dropped. “Besides that, those movies are actually really, really good! So shut the fuck up!”

“Of course they are.”

“I hate you!”

“No you don’t! Oh, I expect you at the 28th at my place by the way, we are having dinner together. It’s time that you meet my finace, he’s very lovely and he should meet my maiden of honour at least once.”

“Your what?”

“Don’t act like you didn’t know it would be you!”

“I’d be offended if I didn’t!”

_“Does that mean we’ll have to wear a dress?”_

“Why is there a ghost hat looks exactly like you?” You shot Chara a quick glare but they just shrugged and leaned on your shoulder, arms draped around your neck.

“That’s a long story for another day. And this here is Chara. Just ignore them, they _love_ it when you do! I do it all the time!” You said cheerily and Chara pouted.

 _“You are mean_!”

 

You didn’t say a single word as you were driving towards Billy’s house after you put the directions into your phone but rather listened to the kids in the back babble on, like kids do. Your fingers tapping at the wheel were the only indication that something was going on, other than that, you seemed cool and collected. It wasn’t a long drive, about twenty minutes later, you parked in front of a suburban house with a snowcovered roof and tacky Christmas decorations. You slipped out of the car and waited for the kids to get out, before locking the doors. Frisk was running ahead, their friend right behind them.

“Hey, be careful you two, will you! And wait up!” you called after them and Frisk waved at you, waiting by the door. The snow crunched underneath your feet as you sped up, catching up with them and ruffling their hair. “Little troublemaker!” you called affectionate and they giggled cheerily. Rolling your eyes, you pressed the little button to ring the doorbell with a slender finger and waited, Arms crossed. The door opened not even a minute later and a loud screech pierced your ears.

“BILLY!” Helen pulled the boy closer with a sharp motion. “Where have you been? Do you even know how late it is? And what happened to your arm!” They eyes fell on you and Frisk and she pointed at you, her voice shrill and high. “What have you done to my poor boy!” Frisk winced but you smiled at her gently.

“We brought him to a doctor to fix his arm after he slipped and broke it. No thanks needed, Helen. I know how it must be, being just so busy all the time…” She flinched and gasped for air like a fish out of water.

“How _dare_ you…”

“Billy, why don’t you go and show Frisk your room? Maybe they’ll sign your cast”

“Oh, yes, sweet!” He grabbed Frisks hand who instantly blushed and dragged them inside. “I need to show you this cool new game I got! You’ll love it!” His mom was still glaring daggers at you, but you just batted your eyelashes and slipped past her into the house.

“What do you think, you are doing?”

“Oh nothing, I just thought you might wanna talk, since you obviously have a problem with my child.” She made a disgruntled noise and turned to walk back to her kitchen. This wasn’t a homely and cozy kitchen like Toriels or a well-used one like Papyrus’ or Undyne’s, this kitchen was nothing but show with its white marble and mahogany counters and huge glass windows. She grabbed the glass of wine she had herself poured and took a huge sip as you followed her.

“I didn’t know they were _your_ kid.” There was obvious malice in her voice but you didn’t let yourself intimidate by her.

“Oh well, there are many things you don’t know or won’t understand. And I can be quite the Mom-Person.”

“Whatever. So I guess you talked to Graves?”

“The director? Yes, indeed, I did!”

“Then this conversation is absolutely redundant. Except you are here for some tips on how to raise a human child.” She clicked her tongue and took another gulp. “I am not surprised, Frisk is becoming such an uncivilised, growing up with all of those monsters around them, Queen or not. Well, at least they have someone of their own kind around. Poor child will never…” She couldn’t tell you, what Frisk could or couldn’t do, as you grabbed a sharp kitchen knife from the display and stabbed it into the soft mahogany just mere millimetres from her hand away with a sharp motion, quicker than it should have been possible. It got stuck in the wood and kept swaying for a seconds, as you let go of it.

“The next time you touch Frisk again, the knife’s in your hand, you hear me?” You growled at her and the colour drained from her face quicker than she did with her wine.

“You-You can’t do this! I’ll call the police!” A sinister chuckle escaped you and you leaned in closer. Moments like that made you understand when Chara said, that you could be a very scary and sinister woman sometimes. But you’ve had years of watching your aunt work her magic and your anger wasn’t something that should be taken lightly.

“Go ahead. Call them. I am sure they will be delighted to hear, that your child has a broken arm because you neglected your parental duties. Or that he gets beaten regularly.”

“What are you-How?” she sputtered and your brows furrowed.

“I know well enough how those bruises look. I don’t care if it’s you or your stupid husband, if I’ll ever spot even a hair that’s misplaced on his head, I will come back and let my anger rain upon you in full force!”

“You are bluffing! When my husband comes back…”

“Oh, you wanna wait for him? Does he know that you fucked the director in his office earlier today, or should I tell him?” The expression on her face was priceless. “I smelled your cheap perfume the second I stepped in and there was a lipstickstain on his collar. And by god, you are the only one actually dumb enough to wear that exact shade of orange.” You pointed at her mouth, chuckling. “It’s still smudged, even.”

“Oh god, please don’t tell my husband!” She whimpered, fear all over her face and she was moving back as you leaned in closer.

“Then get off of Frisk and stop being an absolute asshole and monsterphobe, you absolute fucking walnut. You want me to be your friend, trust me. Don’t get on my wrong side. This is the first and only warning you’ll get.” You pushed back and strutted back out of the kitchen. As you heard her suppress a sob, you grew softer and stopped, hesitating for a second. “If your husband mistreats you, you can always come to me. I know how it is. I am not heartless.” Without looking back, you walked upstairs, where you heard the familiar noise of child’s play and entered Billy’s room. He and Frisk were playing with some of his legos and you set down with them, now smiling again.

“Heya big guys.”

“Look! Frisk drew on my arm!” the boy grinned loopy and you chuckled as you looked at the wobbly drawing on the cast! “Are you gonna sign it too?”

“Sure, gimme that marker!” You said and wrote your name as well as a tiny doodle next to it. He bent and contorted his body to an impossible degree to look at it.

“Maaaaan, that’s awesome!”

“Heh, I try!”

 _You totally should let Papyrus draw on it! He’s really good at it!_ Frisk signed and his eyes grew large.

“You really think, the great Papyrus would do that?”

 _Sure, he is the coolest ever_!

“You know Paps?” you asked carefully and he shrugged.

“Not personally, but Frisk talks about their mosnterfriends all the time! I really wanna meet them sometimes but mom doesn’t let me. She’s scared of monsters but that’s so stupid!”

“You are not?”

“Course not! Everyone knows that monsters are the coolest! I mean, they are monsters and they have all of that cool magic and stuff! And they are super nice and everything!”

“ _He has a point there_!”

“You just say that because you hate humans.” The boy gasped and leaned forward so much, that he had to brace himself with his arms.

“Is that a monster too? Are you a ghost? Why do you look so much like Elaine?” He seemed to be bubbling with excitement and you laughed.

“That’s Chara, they are kinda… Uh… stuck to me.”

“Are you Elaines dead twin? Are you haunting them?”

“ _No, I am not. Why would anyone come back to haunt their twin, I’d be glad to be rid of them!”_

“You’re just grumpy because of what I said back at Curls! You love me, admit it!” They rolled their eyes and shrugged, but their corners were twitching. “They can be kind of grumpy sometimes.” You chucked and Chara stuck out their tongue at you, arms crossed. “But uh, hey…” You pulled out a piece of paper and wrote your number on it with the marker that was still in your hand before handing it to the child. “If anything’s happening to you or you need help, you can call me anytime!” You watched Frisk from the corner of your eye and your lips curled. “And I’m sure Frisk would give you their number any second and help you too!” They blushed just a tiny bit bud nodded. Man, you were the absolute best wingman ever!  
Billy stared at the piece of paper before grinning.

“Wow! Thanks a bunch! That’s so nice of you, Miss!” You just laughed and watched them play some more.

Later in the car, tears were stinging in your eyes and you sat there for a long time, both Frisk and Chara hugging you for the whole duration of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next two chapters will be Christmas relateeeeeeed!!! And I've waited so long to bring in someone that will be there next chapter *^*


	29. A soft whisper in the night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> IT'S STARTING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAAAAAAAAS!   
> And since I get to spend it alone this year, I'll write something for you! <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "So, what are you getting for Christmas, Mommy Ellie?"

 Toriels entire house smelled like Cookies and fir as you watched Undyne and Papyrus from the door trying to set up the Christmas Tree in the living room. Both of them were wearing the ugliest, most festive Christmas jumpers you’ve ever seen in your life. Pap’s was a black one with tiny skeletons he must have grabbed during the Halloween season and he had stapled tiny Christmas hats to each and everyone of them and he managed to weave multiple strands of battery charged LED’s into it, so it was flashing bright enough to be seen from space.

And Undyne’s sweter was singing. You’ve seen it in the stores two weeks ago and it made you laugh so hard that you just had to get it for her. She refused to take it off, so the singing reindeer sounded rather sad by now, merely croaking it’s song. Frisk and Alphys were sorting through the decorations and hanging girlands and flitter everywhere. You tried to avoid the 5000 mistletoes that were hidden everywhere by now, but it was getting harder and harder, as they just seemed to multiply. Mettaton was also very helpful, he and his cousin-a ghost by the name of Napstablook, you were too shy to introduce yourself too, as you’ve been a hardcore fan of his music for AGES-were sitting over by the grand piano to enlighten everyone. Well, Blooky was sitting by the piano, playing it. Metta was dramatically draped across it, wearing the most fabulous Christmas outfit in the most gorgeous shade of red and singing the carols, his cousin was playing.

You didn’t know how Sans managed to sleep through all of this, the crashing and shouting from his brother and Undyne, the singing, Frisks bubbly mood and this delicious smell.

 _“It’s starting to look a lot like Christmas…_ ” Charas soft voice next to you made you smile and you leaned onto the doorframe.

“You must be happy, getting to spend the holidays with your family again.”

“I am. I really don’t deserve to be so lucky, but I am so glad I get to.”

“I am happy you are.” There was only the slightest glimmer of sadness in your voice, but they didn’t seem to notice, their enchanted face glued to the scenery.

 _“I just wish, that Ree could be here too…_ ” Words failed you, you had no idea how to console them and ease their pain. The loss sat so deep and would probably never cease to go away.

“I know.” You wanted to hug them, so badly, more than usually, as you saw them so sad when they should be happy instead.

 _“We should go now, or it’ll be too late._ ”

“Yeah, okay…” They turned away to the main hallway and you followed them, buttoning up the last few buttons of your midnight blue trenchcoat, the heels of your black, slender boots clicking ever so lightly. You picked up your bag from the bureau with the large mirror as well as the bouquet that was still there. Giving a last glance over your shoulder, you stepped outside and started walking, snow crunching underneath you and drizzling down from above. It was already dusk and the whole town quiet. It was the day before Christmas after all. You didn’t say anything the whole way you were walking until you reached the wrought iron gates of the cemetery. You hesitated for a moment, taking in a deep breath before you dared to enter.

Grave lights were flickering in the oncoming darkness and here and there you could make out splashes of colour from the flowers or wreaths that were left behind. Over all, there weren’t and fresh footprints though, which made you incredibly sad, for some reason.

“Isn’t it sad, to think about that all of these people have to spend Christmas alone?” our burgundy eyes flickered to the ground, your voice nothing more than a murmur.

 _“Buttercup, they are…. It is sad, but the dead don’t celebrate the holidays.”_ A sad expression on your face you looked up to them.

“You are dead too and you are still here” Taken aback, they opened up their mouth, just to close it again, before nuzzling your cheek with one of their ghostly hands and pressing a motherly kiss on your scalp.

_“Yes, but I have you.”_

“You’re a sap sometimes…” Guilt was churning in your insides, and you looked away. Chara only laughed.

The grave you were looking for was a few rows further. Your throat felt so tight as you stopped in front of it and placed the flowers on it.

 

_Rufus Winters_

_*29.02.199x -✝13.07.201x_

_Amélie Winters_

_*07.11.199x -_ _✝_ _13.07.201x_

_Elisabeth Gabrielle Winters_

_*16.05.200x -_ _✝_ _13.07.201x_

_Never accept the world as it is, see it for as it could be_

 

You buried your hands deep inside the pockets of your trenchcoat, your eyes burning and head low.

“I miss you guys.” You finally whispered, the wind carrying away your words. “I miss you every day. On days like this even more. There isn’t a moment in my life, where I don’t regret what happened. I am so sorry, that you had to die while I lived. I don’t deserve it. But I won’t waste that, not anymore. I promise you, I’ll do something with my life.” You blinked rapidly and took in a deep breath. “I have a lot of friends now. They are all super nice and love me and all of them worry, I couldn’t happier. And I met someone. He is with those others. And he’s a skeleton. In fact, all of them are monsters. I know, you’d be exhilarated Dad, you’ve been working at the barrier for ages to find out what it is. They have so many things we can learn from them. And a kid is with them, Frisk. They speak in sign most of the time, like you Mom. I’m so glad, you taught me, they are just the sweetest little muffin ever. And Lizzy, you’d be best friends with Papyrus, Sans brother. You two are so much alike, I just want to gobbli him up and never stop hugging him. He is just the purest soul. And he’s totally in love with my boss, Mettaton. They are heads over heels over each other but both of them are too stpid to do anything. Undyne is my new best friend. She’s a fish and she and her girlfriend Alphys are total OPT-relationshipgoals. One day I want someone to look at me like they look at each other. And they totally try to hook me up with Sans. He’s the guy I told you about. I really really like him, like, more than like but… Mom, I wish you were here to give me relationship advice. After everything that has happened I am scared of loving and I scared that I can’t love anymore. Everything’s so weird now and I am scared shitless most of the time. I wouldn’t be able to do any of this without Chara. You remember Chara? I told you about them the last time I was here. We… They seem so much happier now but I am afraid to tell them what’s happening to me. They are somewhere over there so they can’t hear us. I really appreciate the  bit of privacy I’ve got. But… I feel so weird. It must be so hard to wake up with memories of different timelines and loops and outcomes but lately their memories start mixing with mine and it gets harder and harder distinguishing between our pasts. Sometimes, I wake up and can still feel the poison burning my insides, even though I never took those buttercups. They don’t know, I still keep so many secrets, to not upset them. They deserve so much happiness. Everyone does. And they seem to have so much fun with all this holiday spirit around. I am not that much of a Christmas person, it’s just not the same without Mom and Auntie Hel barricading the kitchen and Dad making bad jokes and setting up the tree or watching Lizzy tearing apart all of those wrappers. I remember it so vividly, everything. Even tiny things like when Dad used to pick me up because I’ve always been so tiny-delicate, as Mom used to say-to set up the star for the tree. Now of course, we don’t need that anymore, we’ve got Metta, he is Star enough to light up every tree in his presence.” You laughed sadly and rubbed your hands together. “I’m sorry I’m babbling so much, I know you can’t hear me where you are now but I still feel like this could reach you. I love all of you so much, Mom, Dad, Lizzy…”

 _“Hey, sorry to interrupt you, but someone’s coming…_ ” Chara walked over from their point of observation and you smiled at them.

“It’s probably someone like me, paying their lost ones respect.” They hesitated for a moment.

_“Probably, yeah, I’m just worried…”_

“You always worry too much, Chara.” You straightened yourself and stretched until the satisfying pop came. “We should go now anyways, it’s getting late. And we still have one stop.”

 _“Alright… I’m sorry I interrupted you when…”_ Suddenly they froze into place, eyes locked behind you on whoever it is. They were slightly shaking.

“Hey, Chara, what is it?” Your voice was hushed and low.

 _“Dad…”_ was the only thing they said and you craned your neck as you looked behind you, staring at the huge goatmonster behind you. There was no doubt, that this was Asgore himself, the long curled horns and golden mane gave it away in a second. He stared at you as well, eyes round and shock written all over his face.

“Of course…” you mumbled. “The humans were buried here after the Underground emptied…”

“Chara?” His voice was just like you remembered a soft and deep rumble that immediately instigated respect and gave off an aura of authority.

“Only partially…” You answered truthfully and smiled shyly. “My name is Elaine Winters, your majesty.”

“But how… you look… what?” Chara was hiding behind you, though totally unnecessary, since they were only visible to you at the moment. Their fingers gripped the fabric on your back tightly and you could feel them shaking.

“It is a long story. If you walk a bit with me, I will tell you.”

 

You ended up sitting at a parkbench, Chara finally secure enough to show themselves. The king of monsters was a kind man, though you could sense his sadness and guilt from miles away. A heartwarming smile crept on your face as you just stayed put and watched Chara so happily interact with their adoptive father. With Toriel, they were always so calm and collected, loving, yes, but this Chara cracked jokes and kept babbling like a bubbly little child. It was one of the most adorable things, you’ve seen in your life before and you sure as hell wouldn’t interrupt them now. Instead, you closed your eyes and let the memories flood back. You could see their first Christmas together after Chara came to the Underground. They were still so scared, so unsure and frightened. After everything that has happened to them on the surface, you could understand their caution. Toriel has gotten them new, lovely handknitt sweaters and matching mittens and Asgore a set of books about plants, something they seemed so highly interested in, long before the buttercups even crossed their mind. Chara had gotten them  a scrapbook of all of the recipes  from the human world they could remember and a fuzzy, pink pullover that said Mr. Dad Guy. They were lovely and adorable and the biggest dork, even back then.

Azzy has gotten them their golden locket, the one around your neck right now and you surprised a laugh, when you realised, that Chara had gotten him the exact twin of their own. God, those two were just the cutest. They acted so happy and still shy and awkward.

Later in their room, the tears came and spilled over.

They didn’t deserve their love, they told themselves, they didn’t deserve all of this, not someone as rotten as they were.

You knew, that the guilt of their actions weighed on their shoulders each and every day and sometimes, they just wanted to cry and scream but they held it back, for your sake.

You still noticed of course.

So, seeing them so happy, pure and heartwarming joy, meant so much more to you than you could express. Asgore has always been there for them, a beacon of fatherly love and safety, something so unknown to them before.

It was getting darker and darker now, until the night fell and you started to shiver from the snow.

_“Oh golly, I am so sorry Laney, I got carried away! You’re freezing!”_

“No, I am alright, really…”

_“Nonsense! It’s already dark anyways!”_

“Chara is right, human! You shouldn’t linger any longer than necessary.” You rolled your eyes and smiled at him.

“It’s okay, my aunt is very patient and the others know we are around… What are you doing for Christmas?”

“Uhm. As usual, I guess? With a cup of Tea and a good book?”

“ _You are all alone on Christmas, Dad_?” Chara seemed honestly saddened, they were even pouting a bit.

“It is not a big deal, Chara, really. I wouldn’t want to celebrate without my family anyways.”

“Then why don’t you?” You asked him with a smile and both Chara and Asgore blinked at you. “Please, come over tomorrow and join us, Chara seemed so happy to see you and Undyne misses you dearly.”

“I am not sure, Toriel would…”

“Eh, it’ll be fine. I invited you, it will be fine. You can be my date, if you want. And I don’t want you to spend the days alone.” You rubbed your hands together and stared into the darkness upfront, your eyes focused on the flickering lights of the candles. “I’ve spent my last years miserable and alone each holiday and the years prior are better in my mind than they actually were. I only remember the good parts when thinking back, not the many, many years, Mom and Dad had to work and I took care of Lizzy, sometimes my Aunt would be there, but often we were alone. It’s a kind of coldness inside you, that won’t melt easily. So please, join us tomorrow. I’ll handle the others.” The warm smile on your face seemed to break his resistance and he sighed deeply.

“If you wish, child, then I will.” He bowed down to embrace you in a fuzzy hug and you reached up to wrap your arms around him too. You could feel Charas presence in your soul and knew that this wasn’t your hug alone. It’s fine, you were happy for them. You just wanted people to finally be happy again.

The snow kept falling.

 

The knock on the white door was dainty and quiet and almost immediately it opened and the smell of gunpowder and cookiedough engulfed you once again, as your aunt pulled you into a spincrushingly tight hug. She pulled away and smiled, the fine lines in her face deepening.

“Elaine, love, you actually came!”

“Of course, I did! I’m sorry I’m late, I ran into someone I haven’t seen in a long time.”

“Don’t stress, I just worried that you wouldn’t show at all.” Auntie Hel laughed nervously and pulled you inside. Her old cat Gerald immediately strafed around and between your legs, rubbing his crumpled up face against it and you picked him up, lovingly nuzzling close. “Old habits die hard, don’t they?” She rubbed her hands at the apron she was wearing. “I’m sorry for the mess, I have a full house at the moments, I have the whole familia here. We have so many new faces since the monsters came up. Everyone is so lovely and excited. I am in the kitchen with my left hand, she is a total virtuoso. And lordy, I’ve never seen someone so good with money. I don’t think you’ve met!” You laughed and followed her, placing your coat on the hanger and your boots next to a dozen other pairs on the way. Loud chatter came from the huge living room of your Aunts huge cottage and it felt so alive as always. The kitchen was warm and smelled absolutely delicious.

“Hey, Muffet!” you said cheerily and she giggled, covering her mouth with one hand while the other five were still busy on the stove.

“Ahuhuhuhu, welcome to my parlor! I don’t think we have met though?”

“Not personally…” you admitted reluctantly and smiled. “But I have heard the stories. I thought you opened up a spider bakery?”

“Oh she did! And it runs wonderfully!”

“But everybody needs a hobby?” you finished your aunts sentence and laughed.

“Hey, Helvetica, the boys are asking who arrived so late that…” A burly man poked his head in and when his eyes fell on you his whole face lit up and he picked you up to twirl you around like he did when you were still a child. “Oh my, if it isn’t my sweet little Laney! I haven’t seen you in ages!”

“Jack, I’m getting dizzy, put me down!” you giggled and grabbed for his arm when you had solid ground under your feet again to not fall down. Auntie Hel came over and pressed a kiss to his cheek and you gasped like Undyne would do. “Oh my god!”

“What?”

“Please tell me you two are finally an item! I’ve been telling you since I’ve been six years old, that you two are lovely!” When your aunt blushed and her second in command coughed a squeal escaped you and you threw your arms around their necks. “Oh my god, I knew it! This is so great! Best. Christmaspresent. Ever!” Auntie Hel nuzzled your cheek.

“I am glad you are happy for us, laddie.” And suddenly a sinister smile was on her face. “And what about your lovelife?”

“Oh nothing!”

“ _She’s totally dating Sans_!” Chara blurted out and you glared at them.

“Chara, shut the fuck up, we aren’t dating!”

_“But you are going on dates!”_

“It’s just dinner.”

_“And you kissed!”_

“Those were exceptions!”

_“And you are in denial! Just because he hasn’t asked you formally?”_

“I am a very romantic person, shut up or I swear to god, I will call an exorcist!”

“ _Aaaaaaw, did I hit a sore spot_?”

“I will give you a sore spot if you keep this up!” You hissed and stuck out your tongue at them.

“Oh Children, please don’t argue.” Jack tried to calm you down but your aunt just snorted.

“No, let them bicker, it’s hilarious! And I want to know more!”

“Auntie Heeeeeel!” you whined and blushed.

“Isn’t this Sans guys the one that tried to kill you though?”

“ _Yeah, but that was kind of a misunderstanding and now they are in looooooooooooo-hooooove!_ ” Chara drawled and you swatted at them, hissing incoherent nonsense at them.

Your Aunt and Jack just put their heads together, watching you with a soft smile, their hands intertwined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Wasted! I'm getting wasted!"


	30. Strings and Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> LET'S DO THIS! Diabeetus ahead!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everybody for making my Christmas less lonely <3 You are the best <3

You were sitting on the windowsill with a hot cocoa in your hands, a blanket wrapped around you and your earphones plugged into your phone, gently humming along to the music as you watched the snow outside fall. You felt so cosy right now, you just didn’t want to get up. Frisk was seated at the floor underneath the window and quietly drawing with Chara and Papyrus. The others were downstairs, preparing everything for Christmas Eve, unwrapping all of the presents and such. You were up to watch Frisk and Papyrus, since the two of them still believed in Santa and none of you had the heart to tell them otherwise. And besides that, it would give you a good chance to get away from Sans, something you wouldn’t usually say but since there was a suspiciously growing amount of mistletoes scattered around the house and in the most _random_ places, you had quite a lot of work avoiding them all, to the great displeasure of those popping them up. Of course, Undyne, Alphys and Frisk denied everything but Chara had no shame in admitting that they were involved in this. Cross my heart, _no one_ shipped the two of you harder than the ghostly human attached to your soul.

Frisk patted your knee and you put down the cocoa and your music to look at them. They raised their tiny arms and you picked them up with an accentuated groan, placing them between your legs.

“What is it, love?” They giggled at your pronunciation of the word, as you didn’t say it _love_ per say but more like luv, with a very soft and drawn out v at the end and a sharp and short u, almost just like a buffer between the other letters. You nuzzled their nose and smiled cheerily. “Come on, show Auntie Laney whatcha’ve drawn, will ya?” Frisk shuffled closer and made themselves comfortable between your legs; their back leaned against your chest so you could reach around them.

 **It’s a picture of us!** They signed and showed you the drawing with pride.

“Woooow, it looks really good! What’s that?”

 **That’s Undyne! She’s suplexing the Christmas tree, because she is soooo Strong!** **And Alphy is looking at her with hearteyes!** They pointed at her and then on top of the tree. **And that’s Tonton, he is on the tree because he is the star!**

“That he is, love. Is that Toriel with Pie?”

**Yes! It’s butterscotch! My favourite! And she gives some to Dad! Look, here, that’s him!**

“Oh, Asgore is here?”

 **No, Mom didn’t invite him and all of us were too scared to invite him, since they are technically** **broken up but Mom still has feelings for him, I think!**

 _“Of course she still loves him, Frisk_!” Chara intervened. “ _You can’t spend centuries with each other as soulmates and suddenly hate each other. Mom is just grumpy and stern and Dad is a dork!”_

**Yeah, but I want them to be together again!**

_“Well, you can still hope for a wonder”_ they said and winked at you. _“Maybe Santa heard you and will tell him to come by later!”_

 **Yeah right….** Frisk huffed and crossed their arms, so you pressed a kiss on top of their head.

“Hey, no sulking today! It’s Christmas after all” Your voice was gentle and kind as you pointed at the picture again. “Is that Papyrus? Why is he covered in lips?”

**Noooo, he’s getting love and recognition for Christmas because he is the greatest and best big brunkle ever!**

“What’s a brunkle?”

**Well, Sans is my dunkle, because he is my uncle but he can be such a dad sometimes, it’s really dorky! Paps is my uncle too but way cooler, more like a big bro! So they are my brunkle**

“ _That. Is hilarious_!”

“Chara, you’re a dork as well!” you scolded them as they doubled over in laughter.

 _“Hey Frisk, what is that here_?” they said, looking over your shoulder and pointing at the two figures under a VERY obviously painted mistletoe, you’ve avoided up until now.

 **That is Sans. He is snogging Laney.** Frisk said as if it was the most normal thing in the world and you were taken aback.

“Woah, I am what?”

“ _Didn’t ya hear, you are_ snogging _Sans. Very passionately that is_.” Heat was raising and your complete face was turning red, so you pressed it against Frisk hair to hide it.

“DON’T BE ASHAMED, TINY HUMAN! OR DO YOU NOT WISH TO KISS MY BROTHER?”

“ _Oh Papyrus, the problem is that she wants to_ snogg _him real bad, but poor little Elaine is_ soooo _shy_!” Chara teased and you glared again.

“Chara, stop saying the word snogging, it’s weird!”

“ _No, it’s funny_!”

“BUT HUMAN, WHY WOULD YOU BE SHY? I THOUGHT YOU LIKED SANS?”

“Yeah, of course I like him, but kissing someone is serious matter!” your voice came out muffled. “And I don’t even know if he wants to kiss me back! Or if he’ll like it. What if he thinks it’s weird or gross because I am human.”

 _“Are you mad? He is so head over heels over you, I’m sure he’s just waiting to grab you and…_ ” You pressed your hands against Frisk ears and your voice jumped up three octaves.

“Chara, there are children present!”

“ _Oh, come on, they’ve flirted their way out of the underground, I’m sure nothing we can tell them will shock the little rascal_!”

“BESIDES THAT, SANS HAS EVEN TOLD ME THAT YOU ARE VERY DEAR TO HIM! SO YOU SHOULDN’T WORRY!”

**I know what you should do to get him to kiss you!**

“ _Ugh, this oughta be good_!”

**So! Tonight, when everyone is sleeping, you should sneak into his room.**

“Oh god, where is this going, Frisk”

 **No, listen here. You sneak in, but you are wearing nothing but a BOW!** Chara started to laugh so hard, they sounded like they were choking. **And then you say “Hey, cutie bone! You’ve missed a present under the tree! Don’t you wanna unpack it?” And then you kiss him!**

You face was almost melting off of your face and you were sure that you’ve made some sort of strange noise as your mind wandered some very dark and naughty places at the thought.

“Frisk, what the hell, where do you pick up stuff like that?”

 **What? Undressing helped the two Royal Guard getting together as well! And Undyne said you have a nice butt**!

“Undyne did what?”

**Yeah, after they saw you in the shower.**

“ _We do have a very nice butt, that’s true_ …” Chara admitted and you tilted your head.

“I am not sure if I should be flattered or offended!”

“BE FLATTERED, IT’S A NICER FEELING!”

“Thanks, Paps.” You answered dryly and shook your head. “You guys, I swear…”

_“Noooo, don’t change the subject now! Will you kiss Sans today?”_

“Chara…”

“THE GHOSTLY HUMAN IS RIGHT, YOU SHOULDN’T RUN FROM YOUR FEELINGS. YOU MEAN A LOT TO MY BROTHER AND YOU OBVIOUSLY LIKE HIM BACK. I WANT MY BROTHER TO BE VERY HAPPY AND YOU SEEM TO DO WHAT I HAVE FAILED AT FOR A LONG TIME, AS MUCH AS IT PAINS ME TO ADMIT, THAT I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE FAILED SOMETHING SO ESSENTIAL! AND AS LONG AS YOU WON’T HURT MY BROTHER, YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY TOGETHER!”

“I’d never hurt Sans, Paps, you should know that!”

“GOOD! BECAUSE IF YOU DO, YOU WILL HAVE TO ANSWER TO ME, TINY HUMAN!” You gulped at the subtle note and shivered, something scratching at the back of your mind but you didn’t have time to bother with some weird memory shifts right now.

 _“Yeah, and if he hurts her again, he’ll answer to me, which will be just as unpleasant but with more puns. So you should just go for it_ ”

 **Mom once told me, she asked Dad out in the beginning, because he was too awkward to talk to such a pretty girl. So you can totally do that too**!

“Oh my god, can we please stop talking about me and Sans, for heaven’s sake please!”

“ ** _NO_**?” All three of them decided in unison and you groaned.

“You guys are terrible!” You hickuped and picked up Frisk, sliding from the windowsil. “That’s enough teasing now you guys. It’s time to go downstairs now anyways, I’m sure Santa was here ages ago!” papyrus burst through the door first, shouting SANTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA with all his enthusiasm and Frisk was wriggling in your grasp to follow him, so you let them.

“ _Didn’t you mean_ Sansta?” Chara teased you.

“Get downstairs before I throw something!”

“ _All you’re gonna throw is a hissy fit maybe_!” the snickered and dodged your fist, before heading down themselves. You could look into the living room from the staircase and it felt like your heart was bursting from all of the love you were feeling that exact moment when you looked at the great friends and new family you’ve made. It was such a bittersweet feeling, being so happy but at the same time incredibly sad, for reasons you couldn’t explain.

“Yo, nerd, don’t just stand there and look sappy, come join us!” Undyne shouted and got up to grab your wrist and drag you to the others. Papyrus was currently busy with ripping the paper off of one present that had his name on it.

“Hey, Undyne, wait a sec!” you huffed and she stopped to turn around with raised eyebrows giving you the “What’s now?” look. You just giggled and stepped on your tiptoes to press a quick kiss on her cheek and pointed up. “Mistletoe.” You explained giggling. “And because you are my best friend. Now do me a favour and go and drag Alphy under one and smooch the living shaite out of them, okay? Oh, and keep them away from me. The mistletoes that is, not Alphy.” Grinning, you joined the others in the room, leaving the stunned fish behind to sit of the soft carpet next to Sans.

Papyrus has gotten a new set of actionfigures and multiple cookbooks from you and he seemed so overjoyed, almost like a puppy. You’ve spent so much time on those presents, racking your brain to come up with the perfect, most thoughtful gift for everyone and they seemed so happy about it.

“Darling, don’t you want to unpack your gifts too?” Mettaton chirped and you blinked at him.

“My gifts?” you sputtered and raised your hands to make a dismissive gesture. “Oh nonono, I told you, you shouldn’t have gotten me anything you guys!”

“Oh, papperlapap!” your boss insisted and thrust something into your hands. It felt surprisingly soft, despite the absolute perfect wrapping. Carefully, you pulled the wrapping to the side and lifted the soft, shimmery fabric of the way too familiar dress. It was black and almost moved on its own, the airy chiffon making it look light and delicate. The top had a _spectacular_ cleavage, light netting between the two cups making it look elegant and subtle instead of something that could easily be so slutty and less than appropriate. The waist was heavily embroidered with gemstones up to the neckline. The whole thing looked like the nightsky. At a loss of words you admired the handywork, you’ve went to a fashionschool and technically, you could call yourself a tailor since you graduated, even though you didn’t, so you knew how to spot expertise and this was just… wow. This was something else.

“Metta that’s… that’s beautiful…”

“I found the sketch in your sketchbook the other day and thought that it would look stunning on you darling. And now you don’t have an excuse to join me at big events anymore, because now I got you a pretty dress that will blind just about anyone!” He laughed dramatically and you blushed heavily. “Oh, but there is more in there!”

“More?” you hasped and pulled the dress to the side, revealing the second part of the gift-and started screeching. “Oh my god, Metta, is that Dr. Strange and Civil War? I didn’t even know those were out yet?” you gasped. He just winked at you, his lips curled upwards.

“Open it.” Questioning you did and almost threw the thing through the room.

“JEESUS!” you heaved and lunged forward to hug him as tight as you could. “Oh my god, thank you, thank you, thank you!” You were close to start crying. “How did you get them to be signed?”

“Oh darling, a star of my calibre has his connections.” He hugged you back. “Anything for my best employee and biggest fan out there.” He winked at you and you were radiant, almost shoving them under Sans nose as you sat back down again.

“We _need_ to watch these later! They are _so_ good. They are my favourite movies at the moment!”

“Uh…”

“No, you don’t have a say in it! We are gonna watch them! And I will cry and scream and fangirl harder than Alphys ever did, so be prepared!” A crooked smile appeared on his face, you didn’t even notice his hand on top of yours, completely overcome b your childish joy.

“Gosh, you are cute when you get like this…” he mumbled.

“Huh, did ya say something?”

“Nope, not at all!” A blue blush spread across his face and you chuckled quietly.

“You are so weird sometimes, Sans!”

“OURS NEXT, NERD!” Undyne proclaimed and shoved a present into you with vigour.

“Ouff, Undyne…” you grasped for air.

“C-Carefull!” Alphy scolded them. “I-it’s from both of us!”

The package held a full bottle of the infamous chocolate tequila and you raised your eyebrows.

“If this is supposed to bring some fun memories back, Tequila is kinda working against it, you guys”

“FUFUFUFUFUFU,THAT’S WHAT YOU ARE SAYING!”

“T-There is an en-envelope too!”

“What? oh?” you lifted the bottle, looking underneath to pick the neat, white little envelope up. “Woaaaaah, you guys are getting me a whole year of Netflix?”

“Y-yeah! A-And maybe you can watch those animes I told you about?”

“I’ll so do that Alphys! I still wanna know what’s with all the hype with that Yuki on ice thing!”

“It’s Yuri on ice!”

“Whooops, my bad!” you laughed, as Undyne leaned in, murmuring from the corner of her mouth.

“And it makes a good opportunity to get some Netflix and Ch…”

“UNDYNE!” you screeched and she just howled with laughter.

“I’m just messing with ya, nerd!” and then, a bit quieter. “You should be glad that Alphy picked your gift, because I would have gotten you some sexy lingerie to seduce your bony little friend over there”

“Undyne, stop!” you laughed and threw a pillow into her face before she gave you a noogie.

“CHRISTMAS NOOGIE OF AFFECTION!”

“Undyne, her hair!” Metta gasped. “I’ve worked so hard on that, don’t you dare ruining those pretty curls or ASGORE MAY HELP YOU!” She let go of you and Metta was instantly fuzzing over you, smoothing out your now messily curled hair.

“Hey, relax, t’s just hair!”

“Just hair? Just hair? But dearest, I don’t even wanna hear you _think_ something this awful!” Rolling your eyes your shooed him back again, shaking your head a bit.

“HUMAN! PLEASE UNPACK OUR GIFT AS WELL! SANS AND I HAVE PUT A LOT OF THOUGHT INTO IT!” Papyrus placed something in your lap with an astonishing amount of care. It was heavy and bigger than expected and your eyebrows shot up.

“Papyrus, whatever it is, this seems really expensive and…. You’ve done so much for me already, I don’t know if I can accept this!”

“Heh, maybe unpack it before you say something like that. My **guts** tell me, you are gonna be all **bones** for it!”

“SANS! STOP RUINING CHRISTMAS WITH YOUR AWFUL PUNS! AND YOU HUMAN!” You pressed your lips together and raised your hands as if he just caught you doing something you shouldn’t do. “PLEASE, LOOK AT IT AT LEAST! YOU ARE OUR DEAREST FRIEND AND I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, PUT SO MUCH WORK INTO EXPERTISELY WRAPPING IT, SINCE MY LAZY BROTHER ONLY WANTED TO STICK A BOW TO IT!”

“Honestly, that’s exactly what I would expect from him! What would he do without a brother a great and talented as such, Paps?”

“EXACTLY! NO, PLEASE DON’T STALL ANYMORE! I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOUR OVERJOYED FACE, HUMAN!”

“ _Come on, buttercup, don’t let em waiting, I wanna know too!_ ” Chara was nestled comfortable with their mother and nodded at you encouragingly, so you let out a deep sigh and started to tear away the paper carefully.

“You are…. Giving me a wooden box for Christmas?”

“OF COURSE NOT, DUMMY! YOU HAVE TO LOOK INSIDE!” Your fingers slid over the polished case with feather light touches before wandering to the two golden snaps holding it close and slipping it open. Nervously, you lifted the lid and immediately turned to stone.

“Oh.” you whispered hoarsely, pressing your hands over your mouth.

“uh. If you don’t like it… We can still get you something else. We weren’t sure what you would like so I went and asked Carmen what you would like. She gave us the hint and… are you crying.” Sans sounded so insecure all of a sudden, when the first drop made its way out of your eyes. “Oh damn, you are, aren’t you” Chara jumped up from their place and was immediately by your side, looking over your shoulder as you picked up the violin from its place in the velvet covered case, your hands shaking.

“ _Guys, you shouldn’t have…_ ” they whispered.

“DO YOU NOT LIKE IT, HUMAN?” Your fingers traced the beautiful instrument you’ve always loved to play until everything went down the drain with featherlight touches. It was a warm brown and glimmered in the light. It was perfectly balanced in your hands. The tension in the room was thick enough to cut it; another tear fell from your eyes before you pressed it to your chest as gently as possible. And then something happened.

_You smiled at them._

Not your usual fake ones you put up to cover up our state of constant emotional exhaustion. It was the first real smile you smiled since the accident. It was bright and wide and probably rooked extremely ridiculous and there were still tears in your eyes but you were just so happy this exact moment.

“Papyrus… Sans…” your voice was shaking so much, it was embarrassing. “I… I don’t know what to say.” You could feel Chara nuzzle closer.

“I AM GLAD YOU SEEM TO BE HAPPY WITH YOUR PRESENT!” Sans didn’t say anything, he was just staring at you.

“ _Can you play something for me?_ ”

“Maybe later, okay? I- It’s been a while since I played anything. And-And I want the first time to be mine.” You whispered, deeply ashamed yet still smiling. “Then I’ll play for you” Charas smile softened and they poked your cheek.

“ _Alright ya big weenie. Now go hug the boys_!” Carefully, you placed the violin back onto the deep purple velvet and closed the case before lunging to pull the two skeletons into the tightest hug you could bring up.

“Thank you…” you whispered and pulled back, wiping the embarrassing tears from your eyes. You could hear the doorbell ring and Chara gasped excited when Frisk jumped up to run and get it.

“Curious.” Toriels soft voice echoed through the room. “Who could that be?”

Frisk almost ran back in here a minute later, signing more excited than ever, Asgore right behind them, obviously uncomfortable. Toriel went ridgid in her chair.

“ _This…. Might have been a bad idea_.” Chara murmured to you and you shushed them.

“Wait, you invited him here?” Sans hissed to you but you just grimaced at him.

“Uhm. Merry Christmas to all of you?” Asgore seemed so incredibly insecure, one day the poor bloke would break your heart.

“Asgore? What are you doing here?” His wife seemed just as surprised as displeased with the surprise guest, everyone’s eyes moving between her and the King.

“I invited him.” You answered with a strong voice and determination written all over your face.

“Elaine?”

“Yeah, we met yesterday and when I heard that he wanted to spend Christmas alone, I asked him to come.” Your voice didn’t allow for any doubt. “After all, Toriel, you are not the only one that has lost a child. And Chara seemed so happy to see him again. Frisk too, if I look at them. I am sure we can all manage to put our differences aside for one night?” Your smile was short but there was a certain glimmer in your eye that gave off a feisty and devious look.

“B-But of course!” she sputtered, not expecting your answer. Chara was over there with Frisk by their Dad and ruffling their short, brown hair.

“ _Didn’t I tell you, twerp?_ ”

**Best. Christmas. Ever!**

 

Sans only noticed your disappearance after Toriel had sent Papyrus and Frisk to bed, Undyne and Alphys already passed out on the couch and cuddling. The tincan had left a while ago already, so it was just Asgore and Toriel together with Chara in the living room now. Though the king and queen seemed incredibly stiff in each other’s presence, they also looked incredibly content to spend the holidays together.

He was looking for you, wanting to talk to you before the day ended but you had mysteriously disappeared, the wooden case with you. The door towards the garden peaked his interest, also since he could hear the faint notes of a violin slipping in. It sounded so bittersweet and oddly familiar to him and he couldn’t help himself but slip outside and follow the notes that were coaxing him closer. The contrast between you and the snow covered ground was stark yet not unpleasant. Metaton had outdone himself with his work today, you were probably the most beautiful thing he’s created yet. Your gingery brown hair was slightly curly and you were wearing just enough makeup to accentuate your natural features. The velvet dress you were wearing clung nicely to your body, showing off your slender yet curvy features. God, how often did he think to himself, how much he’d just want to touch you, without being able to do so.

Whatever was going on between the two of you, it was confusing as hell. You were drawn to each other and yet constantly shied away. He needed you and yet he knew that you’d most likely be scared of loving someone for the rest of your life. He didn’t want to hurt you, seeing you happy brought him just as much joy as seeing his brother happy.

But when you had smiled at him-the first real smile, he’s ever seen from you, not just these almost smiles, that never really reached your eyes-he knew that he wanted to be the one that could make you smile like that forever. You probably didn’t even know how pretty your smile was, with your nose wrinkling just a little bit, so your freckles would start to dance all over your face and the deep dimples on your cheeks would come to show. In his eyes-pun intended-you’d be the most incredible thing ever.

Right now, you were a sight to behold as well, the pale moonlight drenched your soft skin in a milky light, your long lashes casting shadows on your cheeks, as you moved with the music you were making. Your slender, talented fingers were eliciting an oddly familiar tune from the strings of the violin, the bow moving fast and then slowing down again. It was like you were casting your very own kind of magic on him.

Sometimes, he asked himself if you were even real.

He could have stood there, watching you until time itself stopped and he’d turn into dust, if he had the chance. Sadly, this would never happen, as you finished your song and lowered the instrument, your back still turned halfway towards him, eyes closed and a serene smile on your lips. He preferred your real one.

“Have you been listening for a long time, Sans?” He flinched at the words and blue flushed his cheeks.

“I uhm..” the skeleton rubbed his skull nervously. “I’m not exactly sure…?” You opened your eyes, those beautiful red eyes, shining at him like rubies, and looked at him, obviously amused as he stepped closer.

“It’s a beautiful gift, Sans.” You whispered, still completely overcome by emotion. “thank you so much. I.. I don’t know how I deserve this.”

“Seeing you smile like that was worth it alone.” The words had left his mouth before he could think about it twice. He couldn’t stop it and he wasn’t sure if he wanted too.

Your cheeks turned completely red at the words and you blinked at him doe-eyed.

“You didn’t mean that.” Sans chuckled deeply and stepped closer, tugging at one of your curls and watching it bounce right back.

“I say a lot of things, I don’t really mean” He locked eyes with you, his grin confident and just a tad cocky. “That wasn’t one of them.”

“Geeee, Sans…” you muttered, embarrassed.

“No really. And if your smile wasn’t enough, seeing you play surely was.”

“I’m not even that good…” you admitted, looking down to the ground. He cupped one of your cheeks and made you look at him.

“You are perfect.” Your face must have been 50 shades of red right now, and you looked at Sans from underneath your lashes.

“Sans, you…” Your gaze wandered even higher and you crocked your neck to the side just the tiniest bit, your mouth twitching. “Oh…”

The flickering white lights illuminating Sans eyesockets followed your eyes and he started chuckling.

“Mistletoe.”

“And after I’ve been trying so hard to avoid them…” you mumbled, before the short skeleton pulled your face towards him again.

“You know what they say, if you meet under the mistletoe, you have to kiss…”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that before.”

“Elaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Merry Christmas” Next thing you know is that your lips lie against smooth bone and you closed your eyes, enjoying this gentle and soft kiss. Never before have you been kissed like this. It felt so sweet and loving, it made your heart flutter how careful Sans was treating you, not like you were fragile or broken like anyone else would do, considering your state, but much rather like something very precious. It made you feel safe with him, a warm, fuzzy feeling filling you completely, from your toes up to your head, your bod just melting into him. You didn’t even notice the tears falling from your eyes, until Sans gently brushed them away with his thumb, cupping your cheeks in the process. Shyly, you wrapped your arms around his neck, careful to not damage your Christmas present.

“ _Hey Guys, Mom said I should-OH GOD DAMN IT!_ ” The two of you jolted apart so quickly that you were sure that you heard at least one of your joints pop. Chara was standing a few feet behind you, their face contorted into a grimace. You could have died right here, your face was so seriously flushed, it must have been at least the colour of your eyes.  Sans eyes were completely hollow and his cheeks dusted a light blue shade.“ _Seriously, you couldn’t hold it together 15 more minutes? Now I have to pay Undyne because you kissed before midnight!”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE GOT OUR KISS!!


	31. -Reset-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah, after the heavy amount of fluff in the last chapters....  
> It's time to be back 
> 
> This gon be kinda sad. like very sad. Cause fuck happiness. I want the suffering!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry Elaine for what I am doing to you.  
> One day you'll understand.  
> But not today  
> Today, you are going to suffer

Your mother once told you, that there was good in everything, even if it didn't look like it. You figured she was right.

 

Your body would probably hurt for the next few days, but you were expecting such a thing after what happened.

 

You haven’t spoken since then. You didn’t know how much time has passed since then, but it must have been at least a few hours

 

Though it was cold, you felt oddly calm.

 

Coldness. Coldness and Emptiness.

That was all you could feel right now. Nothing more, nothing less. The whole world appeared muted down, your gaze blank and cloudy. You couldn’t even feel your own heartbeat.

 

_He will be mad!_

I know

_He will hurt you again_

I know

 

_It was dark when you opened your eyes for the first time._

 

The hours went ticking by-

 

You could feel, how your intestines started to clench and for just a moment, everything seemed to slow down. 

 

You’ve always hated the black.

 

Bless those memories, that weren’t really yours, but still etched their way into your brain.

 

You put down the mug roughly, so it made a loud clank-sound

 

You tried very hard, not to make a sound or look as miserable, as you felt, but it was basically impossible.

 

You caught yourself more often than not, just staring at your hand, flexing the fingers and observing every muscle moving, bending and working under the pale skin.

 

You quickly covered the bruise with the palm of your hand

 

Something changed.

 

It’s better like that.

 

You wouldn’t crack

 

Where  _could_  you go? Could you go back?

Probably not.

 

You didn’t know why you came here, it was the first thing that came to your mind.

Your abandoned childhood house.

 

You called for help

 

But nobody came.

 

So you grew cold and distant, fighting on your own.

 

Your skin was so cold, still-

 

It was a calm night. The snow fell from the gray sky towards the earth, covering everything in a thick, white blanket and calamity. The snow was at least 10cm by now, probably more. You felt surprisingly calm as well. You shouldn’t feel so calm

 

How pathetic you must look.

 

No one believed you, you were alone with this, maybe they were right, maybe it was your fault that…

 

You covered your face with your hands and placed your forehead against the cool surface of the table, shaking so much and your vision clouded by tears.

 

God, you were so young

 

Tears were stinging in your eyes and you sat there for a long time

 

The snow kept falling.

 

You were close to start crying.

 

It would be yet another lonely Christmas for you. No parents, no friends, no family, no one that cared.

You were alone.

It would be your last Christmas.

You heard glass shatter and closed your eyes with a sad smile.

 

“You should have known better than to run.”

 

You were so cold, not only numb on the outside but also on the inside.

 

You couldn’t even feel the knife slicing your throat or that he dumped your corpse at Mt. Ebott.

 

The only thing you could feel for a long time was the darkness growing inside of you.

 

You were falling, down the endless road, memories flashing by like pictures, a mixed up mess of your memories, Charas memories and the memories of you’s that weren’t yours but almost could have been.

You wanted to scream.

It was so much, too much. Your head was going to burst, it would explode. Oh god, and you were still falling.

You wanted to scream.

But you couldn’t, your neck was still sliced open. You tried to reach out to the people flashing before your eyes, tried to grab a skeletons hand, tried to reach out to Chara but you were alone. None of them knew you, they didn’t know you existed, why would they bother with you? Why would anyone ever bother with you? You had no one. No one cared and no one would miss you. There was no one that would look for you after your death. You were completely and utterly alone and unloved.

You wanted to scream.  

 

 

You jolted up from the bed, breathing ragged and coming out in short gasps. Your head was hurting so much again, oh god, it felt like bursting. You pressed the ball of your hands against your eyesockets until lights were exploding behind the lids. Your stomach was rumouring and rising, you were fighting to keep your food down, a broken sob falling from your lips. At least something else than bloody gurgling came out. Never would you forget the feeling of a sliced open neck.

You haven’t felt this much distress in a long time, everything was turning, everything was spinning, moving so fast and slowing down at the same time.

Someone was rubbing your back and calling your name but you couldn’t understand. You just couldn’t.

“Elaine, breathe. Please, hey, it’s me, Sans. You are safe right now, noting can hurt you.” He murmured and you pulled your legs towards your chest, rocking slightly.

“What time is it?” Your voice felt raw and hurt. Maybe someone did cut you open?

“It’s about three in the…”

“No, you don’t understand…” you hissed, now pressing your hands against your temples and growing more and more panicky. “What _timeline_ is it, Sans?”

“What.” When he didn’t answer you immediately, your breathing became harder, panting and you gripped your own hair, pulling at it until it started to hurt.

“I… I don’t know what happened. I don’t know where I am. Did I die already?”

“I don’t know what you are talking about, Elaine. Hey, look at me, please!” the skeleton begged and you looked at him with teary eyes, panic written all over your face.

“You don’t understand. I don’t understand. What is going on? Where am I? _When_ am I? I died again. I always die. And-And I wake up here and… I am so confused…” You started hitting your own head and shaking it almost violently. “Where is my family? Did they die? Or did I fix things this time? I don’t have the keypoints anymore.” Desperate, you pulled up your sleeves to stare at the ugly scars there and let out a broken sob, frantically scratching at them now, hard enough to draw blood, before a strong skeletal hand could stop you and a toothy grin was pressed against your lips, effectively silencing your panicattack .

“That’s it, breathing.” He muttered as you sucked in a deep breath once he let go, putting his hands on your cheeks, framing your face so you had to look at him. “You are at Toriels house, it’s the day after Christmas. Everyone is safe and sound, this is a pacifist timeline where monsters came to the above five years ago on the 13th of July 201x, the day you and your family had that horrible accident. You were stuck in a very dark place and then in an even darker one with someone that is more monster than anyone in the underground could ever be. But you are free now, you are here with me, Elaine and you are safe. You didn’t die and you won’t anytime soon, not if I can help it.” You nodded jagged and pressed your face against his chest, clutching him tight. He pressed his face against your hair in something that mimicked a kiss. “That wasn’t a nightmare.”

“I don’t have nightmares anymore.” You whispered, still shaking. “Where is Chara?”

“Asleep.”

“Good. I don’t want them to notice. I managed to hide it up until now.” He pulled away and sat down next to you on the bed, staring at you intensely.

“Elaine, what is going on here?” You wrapped your arms around your legs and put your chin on your knees. You were shaking your head, hiding your face once again. “Please, talk to me. You can’t keep everything to yourself, look at you. You are breaking apart. Do you want me to go and get Chara? You don’t have to talk to me if-“

“No! Don’t wake them, please!” you begged, grabbing his sleeve. “I’ll talk, but keep them out of this!”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to…. But what in heaven’s name is going on?”

“I am not sure.” You started slowly. “I think… I think I remembered a different timeline. One where I died. And when I woke up I didn’t know where or when I was. I panicked.”

“This wasn’t the first time either, right?” You shook your head gently.

“No, I-I have these a lot lately. The first time was the day before… before the whole thing with Chara happened. I dreamed that I tried to kill myself by throwing myself down Mt. Ebott. The next time, I was running from… something. I think I fell. The day after I came back, I had another one. I… I was sitting on Asgores throne, I think I’ve been down there for a while and… I wasn’t the kindest human. I think you killed me that time, but I am not sure, there was someone else I’ve never seen before. The last one was two days ago, after Frisk got in trouble at school. I… I was running the family business instead of Auntie Hel. I got ambushed at a heist and they threw me down a hole at Ebott. I don’t remember anything else.”

“What was it today?”

“I was running from Hugh and was hiding at my old home. He came after me and slit my throat. I-I think that’s the outcome that would have happened if I didn’t run into you guys. I would have gone back there and he would have killed me” You started shaking again. “Oh my god, what if all of those horrible things are happening to me, because I should have died like all of the other versions of me did? Because the universe is trying to fix itself” Tears were building up, ready to spill over. “You should have let me die, when I tried to jump in front of that train, Sans. I am not worth that trouble. I aint worth anything.” He grabbed your face a tad harsher, strands of your reddish brown hair getting tangled in his joints.

“Never. Say something like that ever again. You hear me? You are not worthless and you are not going to die.”

“How can you say stuff like that? You-You should just run away before I cause you more trouble. I am dangerous, I am- I am… I need to… need to leave” You started to shuffle to get out of bed, you had to get away you needed to run, you were dangerous, what if you woke up one day and didn’t know that you were a pacifist but instead the need for genocide overcame you? You needed to leave, you needed to disappear, you needed-

Sans hands grabbed your wrists and he pinned you down to the mattress, so you couldn’t free yourself anymore as he towered over you. You should feel scared and panic now but instead you felt safe underneath him. He wouldn’t hurt you, it was so odd.

“Laney, listen to me. You are not dangerous and you are not going to leave.” He took one of your hands, pressing it against his sternum. “I woke up because I could feel you in distress and that you needed me. You and me, we are tied together and I would never get rid of you.”

“Don’t say it.” You begged, turning your head away from him, tears now escaping. “Please.”

“No.” he growled and you sobbed. “Elaine, look at me.” You shook your head more vigorously now.

“Don’t. Don’t Say it!”

“Why not?”

“Because I can’t say it back. I am sacred.” He put his hand on your cheek and you looked at him again, now crying.

“You don’t have to say it. I know it anyways. I am not going to watch you leave ever again. We had to suffer through so many timelines and resets and I won’t let that ever happen again.”

“Then why do I still have to suffer through them in my head? I hate this. I said I wouldn’t but I hate it. It is so painful to suffer not only through my resets but Charas and Frisks and everyone else’ too. I told myself I would be strong but I am not. I am weak and broken and tangled in the strings of some puppeteers play. I just want it to end, Sans, I just wanna be happy!” Broken sobs were falling from your lips and he leaned down to kiss you again, ever so gently.

“I don’t know why this has happened. But we can fix it. You aren’t alone, you don’t have to be strong all the time anymore.” He cupped your cheek. “I am here for you and I know exactly how it is to wake up, not knowing what reset it is this time. God, I never thought I’d ever meet someone else, that could understand and I know how much it sucks but we are doing this together. And I’ll remind you as often as I have to.”

“Won’t I be a bother to you?” He threw back his head and laughed.

“You could never be bothersome, Elaine.” The hand that wasn’t pinning your hands down gently caressed your cheek. “You are safe with me.”

“I am never safe Sans, he is still out there, looking for me.”

“Who, Hugh?”

“No.” You answered truthfully.

“Then who is it?”

“I can’t remember. Every time I try to, it slips away again. But he is looking for me.”

“Darling, there is nothing out there you’ll have to fear, just remember. You and me, we can fight this hellish loop.”

“I am scared of what I might do one day. I’m slowly going insane and breaking away, bit by bit”

“I’ll be here to stop you. And so is Chara, as much as I hate to admit it.”

“Why are you doing this, Sans?” Another sob fell from your lips. “I am the worst. I hate myself more than anyone else ever could”

“Because I love you.” You froze up, a shiver running down your spine and tears spilling over once again. The locket around your neck jiggled as you moved.

“I begged you not to say it.” He leaned in close and you held your breath.

“I’m not sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did anyone notice that I basically only used phrases from the previous chapters for the thing in the beginning? No? I put up so much work for nothing? ok 
> 
> But yooo. this might be a good pint for some smut, ait?


	32. Beg*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> YEAH, THIS GON BE SMUT WITH PLOT  
> BECAUSE, YAAAAAAAS; PLOT!  
> BUT ONLY A LITTLE PLOT  
> OR A LOT   
> MAYBE A LOTTLE   
> CONSIDER YOURSELF BE WARNED

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY FUCKING NEW YEAR, YA SINNERS!   
> REMEMBER; MUMMY LOVES YOU!

“Because I love you.” You froze up, a shiver running down your spine and tears spilling over once again. The locket around your neck jiggled as you moved.

“I begged you not to say it.” He leaned in close and you held your breath.

“I’m not sorry.” Suddenly, you were fully aware of your entire body. The heavy, rattling breaths that were coming from your heaving chest, your eyes, intensely staring at Sans and the blush that was covering your face as you fully realised that he was on top of you, pinning your arms above you, unable to escape his grasp or the intensity of his gaze on you.

Your face got so much hotter when you realised that you didn’t _want_ to escape.

“Sans…” you breathed, a shiver running down your spine. His free hand gently caressed your cheek and you leaned into the touch, never breaking eyecontact with him as you did. He was staring down at you, the white lights illuminating the dark holes in his skull on your lips as they parted just the tiniest bit to poke out your pink tongue in order to lick your lips. Words were failing you now, you didn’t know what to say or how to say what was on your mind. There were a thousand songs on your mind that would be so much better at conveying emotion than you could ever manage. You’ve never had your sisters silver tongue, you’ve always been better at just showing your emotions instead of babbling like a fool. “Let go of me…” you whispered, still staring at him intensely. A frown appeared on Sans face but he let go of your arms, though reluctantly. Carefully, you took his hand and brushed across the segmented fingers, never before taken the time to admire every little ridge and nick in them. He might be hiding behind a pretentious mask of laziness but his hands were betraying him, showing off that once, he was hardworking and ambitious, before all went down the drain due to the resets. You shouldn’t feel guilty, none of it was directly your fault, you lied to yourself, and none of it involved you.

It could grind you down, having to relive the same scenarios over and over, hoping to just finally get it over with. No one could understand that better than you, being such a kindred spirit.

It could grind you down, yes, but once you get used to it, that is exactly the problem. You are used to being stuck in the same scenarios over and over again. And once everything is over, once you’ve actually managed to escape the constant loop and everything is new, you don’t have control anymore and can’t possibly know what will happen.

There are no more resets.

He must be so scared right now, fearing your rejection or worse. Gently, your eyes shifted back up to meet his, the permanent grin just a little bit strained. Carefully you moved his hand closer, placing it over your heart before grabbing his neck and pulled him closer, pressing your soft lips against his mouth. The kiss was sweet and innocent enough, yet it made your heart beat so much faster against your ribcage and thus Sans’ hand. As you let go, you could see the blue tinting his cheekbones. Intrigued by something that came so naturally to him but shouldn’t be possible, you touched the smooth bone. Then again, he was a monster in the first place and not just some ordinary skeleton, nothing was really impossible. His hand was still on your heart, and you swallowed hard.

“It’s beating so fast… I’m afraid it will break right out of your chest” He seemed so enticed by something as mundane as your heartbeat, that it made you giggle.

“It’s doing that because of you” the words slipped out of you before you could hold them back and you instantly bit your tongue.

Stupid.

You were still scolding yourself when he unexpectedly kissed you, a surprised gasp turning into a tiny moan when his tongue slipped into your slightly opened mouth. You welcomed it, inviting it to play as it explored every last bit of your mouth before fighting for dominance, something you could never win, he was just so _good_. His tongue was something you could get addicted to.   
When he pulled back, you were a panting mess, sprawled out underneath him.

“Shit, Elaine, you can’t just say stuff like that and expect me to…”

“Yes?” You asked breathless, his blush getting more intense. “Sans” your voice was so intense and full of wanton, though quiet. He groaned and his tongue licked over his teeth, oh those perfect teeth and those evil, tempting fangs that totally didn’t do it for you, not at all.

“Stop moaning my name like that, it’s not doing any good to my self-control”

“I’m not moaning your name!” You pouted before sitting up so your mouth was on par with his skull, where his ears normally would be. “This however is…” your voice suddenly dropped and you licked your lips one last time before letting out one, long teasing moan of his name, as seductively as you could bring it up. He obviously sputtered at the sound of it, his bones rattling and you bit your lip, trying to hold back a giggle. The feisty grin was replaced by a sharp yelp as you felt a familiar tug on your soul and were shoved back over the bed by Sans blue magic, his eye completely ablaze.

“So, the smug little kitten wants to tease me.” He growled and holy fuck, that sound alone set something inside of you in flames. You instinctively pressed your knees together, holding your breath. He started to crawl over the bed towards you and the cocky-aaaay-grin returned to your face. This had quickly turned into a playful rangle of dominance, something you knew you wouldn’t win-or even wanted to-but playing with fire could be just so much fun. “You may look so sweet and innocent but I know you can be just as sassy and cheeky if you want to.” He teased, his hands playfully moving up from your ankles up your legs and hips, his face brushing your cheek as he leaned forward. “And maybe even a bit naughty.” You mewled again, rubbing your legs together for friction. God, you were enjoying this more than you should. You’ve never liked sex before, every time Hugh and you… did it, it well… didn’t do it for you. Something was seriously wrong with you, as you enjoyed the thrill of being under the skeleton, seeing him so dominant and actually _wanting_ you. He seemed to notice the flicker of insecurities in your eyes and cupped your cheek. “Too fast?” The skeletons voice was kind and actually worried, but you just shook your head.

“No, I’m just… confused? I-I think I am messed up, I never liked it but… this is actually great.” You pulled him closer by the collar of his shirt, a shiver going down your spine. “I _enjoy_ this, Sans, I enjoy you being like you are right now, all dominant and... I don’t really understand.” His deep chuckle went right to your loins, making you whimper.

“Of course, you are new to this after all. No one took real care of you before, not like I will.” You shivered again, Goosebumps covering your arms . His teeth were scraping over the delicate skin on your neck and you bit your lip to hold back the desperate moan in your throat as you rolled your head back to allow better access. “Who would have thought that you’d be this submissive, kitten?” he growled and this time, the moan fell from your lips.

“Maybe I just like being submissive. Another nudge on the lists of things that are wrong with me.” You joked half-heartedly, trying to cover up your own insecurities. Sans moved back to look you into the eyes, his grin more feral and predatory than ever before.

“Aint nothing wrong with that, Laney. Just because you’re submissive, it aint mean that you don’t deserve respect and care.” He moved closer and you blushed harder. “In fact, I think I just might spoil you.”

“Fuck ey…” you mumbled, looking down. “that’s definitely better than the books Undyne gave me…” A boney white finger pushed your face up again so you could stare into Sans eyesockets.

“Look into my eyes when you say that” he growled and the corners of your mouth were twitching.

“You don’t have eyes”

“Oh, you can be such a smug little bitch sometimes” You giggled deeply and leaned forward, pressing a quick kiss onto his teeth.

“Maybe that’s why I’m so eager to jump your bones!” Your voice sounded dark and seductively in your own ears, something you were really proud of that exact moment. Sans growled again and you grabbed the collar of his shirt to pull him into a tight and passionate kiss. “Only if you want me to, of course.” You suddenly sputtered, insecure.

“Are you asking me for permission to have sex with me?” he chuckled and you looked around the room as if it was hiding the perfect answer from you.

“Uh. Duh? I think it’s safe to say that I’ve learned just how important consent is from past experiences.” It was so hard to concentrate, with that devilish tongue lapping at your shoulder.

“Oh darling, you have no idea, just how much restraint it took me, not to fuck you into the mattress yet ‘till my name is the only thing you can mutter, and my name alone” Gasping you pull him up to you.

“Why don’t you now?”  His mouth was crashing into you, one hand tangled in your still curly hair and one on your hip, his thumb just slipping past the oversized shirt you were wearing, drawing circles on your soft skin. You moaned into the kiss, quietly, to not wake anyone. “Shit, Sans, we are still at Toriels…” you mumbled and he chuckled.

“Want me to teleport?”

“No, s gonna wake Chara and drag them with us. Not something I want right now. S just us, aint gonna share you” you were kissing him all over his face. God, what has gotten into you all of a sudden?   
You only stilled when he nipped at your neck and you had to press both of your hands against your mouth to keep it down.

“Then we just have to keep quiet as I fuck you. Slowly.” You whimpered at his words and started tugging at his shirt.

“Off. Now!” 

“Someone’s a tad demanding”

“ _Off_!” you growled and started to pull his shirt over his head with shaking fingers. He just chuckled at your impatience and helped you with his shirt. Your hands were on his bones before the fabric could hit the floor. Enticed you traced along his collarbone, down the thick sternum and back up again, moving further to the floating ribs. He was shaking under your touch, holding in a broken groan.

His ribcage was broader than a human one, his bones a lot thicker and smooth to the touch. You could feel his magic vibrate inside them and you bit your lip.

“I guess you like what’cha seeing?” Sans suddenly sounded a bit unsure and you looked back up at him, nodding quickly. His hands snaked around your waist under your shirt with a tiny smirk. “So, can I take off yours too?”

“No.” you answered a bit too quickly. “I-I don’t want you to see! It’s not very pretty…” The skeleton chuckled a bit.

“You don’t have to be shy, I can understand if you’re not comfortable but you kinda forget that I’ve already seen you naked, babe. And that sure as hell wasn’t something I wanted to forget.” Your cheeks blushed and you had to avert your eyes. His teeth brushed your cheekbone as he leaned in closer, his voice dangerously low and making you mewl again. God damn him, and his amazing, sexy voice! “And trust me, I couldn’t even forget that if I tried. And I sure as hell wasn’t, making me stay up all night, popping back into my mind” You shivered involuntarily, grabbing the fabric of your pants and a slight gasp left your lips.

“Only the front, Sans…” you managed to choke out, yet you still grabbed the hem of your shirt and pulled it over your head, messing up your hair even more. Too ashamed to even look at him, you crossed your hands in front of your chest. He’s gotten so silent, that you glanced at him through your lashes and felt infinitely more easy, when you noticed the blue tint on his cheek.

“Honestly, I don’t see anything wrong with that. You are still as beautiful as before, though infinitely more tempting.” Carefully, he grabbed your wrists and you let him move them away, so he could look at your breasts, licking his canines and you pressed your thighs together once again. “Absolute perfection.”

“Perfection isn’t as damaged…” you whispered and turned around to show your back, hands balled to fists and head low. Gosh, you knew how ugly those scars were, how unappealing and how much damage they did to you, more so internally than anything else. You could feel the ghostly touch of the hard digit on one of the biggest ones, right between your shoulder blades down to your ribs.

He’d be so disgusted, wouldn’t he?  You were disgusted by yourself, these were markings of somebody else that had broken you, turned you into something damaged and defiled, why would anyone love you, not like that. You were nothing more like a broken doll, abandoned and cast aside. Your only purpose in life was to be here and act as vessel for Chara, they deserved this body so much more than you, treated it better and-

You moaned when Sans was lapping at the back of your nape, sucking at the delicate, branded skin, the sharp canines nipping at them and making your breath go all wonky, not knowing if your lungs wanted to work overtime or just give up working at all. You could taste the blood as you bit your lips harder now, once his hands snaked around your waist to grope your breasts. His hands were cool to the touch and he flicked your nipples in the most delicate ways.

“ _Mine_ …” he growled and you whimpered. “Never gonna let him touch you again…”

Not gonna lie, that was so fucking hot.

“Sans…” you muttered again, your neck rolling to the side to give him better access. He licked at the now open space and one of his hands was steadily moving lover, playing with the string of your baby blue pj pants, the least sexy pair you actually owned, the ones with the teddybears on motorbikes, before he slipped it in, making you choke back a moan when he brushed across the front of your panties.

“Shhhht, we don’t want anyone to hear us, don’t we?” You weren’t able to form proper sentences anymore so you could do nothing but shake your head and whine quietly. “Good girl..” he growled and pressed his thumb at your clit through the fabric of your panties. Shit, he barely touched you and you were putty in his hands. “Look at you, kid, your already soaking, can smell it already.” He pressed his nasal cavity against your neck, his tongue lolling out and lazily licking. “So intoxicating…”

“A-Are you really gonna call me kid now?” A meek try to sound sassy and more composed than you actually were; it probably even had the opposite effect than what you actually wanted.

“No need to get cocky, kitten” He empathised his terrible pun by ribbing you harder, making you suck in a shark breath.

“You know,- _hnngn_ -for a guy without a d-dick, you certainly know how to- _fuck_ -be one….” Suddenly, he pushed your panties to the side and shoved one finger inside of your now dripping heat, laughing as dark as ever.

“Honey, you severely underestimate me” You borderline choked as you felt a tell-tale bulge press against your rear. Almost breaking your spine, you twisted around to stare at him in surprise, jolting as a second digit joined the first, slowly pumping in and out of you.

“Ah-San-hngn-s…” The drag of his fingers were oh so perfect, you could feel every tiny ridge and indent of his cool bones against your velvety walls.

“Shit, kitten, I didn’t think you’d be _so_ tight…” Your eyes were drawn back to the bulge, now emitting a subtle, blue light, almost like his tongue. And if whatever’s in there is even _remotely_ like his tongue, then hoooo boy.

“Show me.” You demanded and he snorted.

“Impatient?”

“Yes, very actually!” You tried to wriggle out of his grasp but you only managed to trip over yourself so you landed on the bed, harshly exhaling and staring up to your bony lover, your pupils dilated and breathing heavily. Your pants were suspiciously low on your hips and Sans grabbed the hem of them, tugging them down sharply.

“Do you think you deserve it?” Before you could answer him, he pushed your knees apart and that devilish blue tongue of his was lapping at your clothed crotch, making you yelp.

 _“S-Sans!_ ” you cried out and he lifted his head, giving you a disapproving look.

 “Didn’t we establish that we are trying to be quiet here?”

“Your fault for s-surprising me like that!” you forced out and he chuckled at you.

“Well, then you will just love what’s coming for you.”

“Show me already!” you put on your best pout.

“Fine, fine, no need to be grumpy!” Slowly, he dragged down his pants and….

“Huuuuh!” You made a weird high pitched noise, crocking your head to the side, lips forming a perfect o shape and eyes slightly bulging before you slapped your hand in front of your face, trying to muffle the snort.

“The fuck’s that supposed to mean?” You couldn’t answer him, your eyes were still glued on what was definitely the biggest, definitely the best and _definitely_ the bluest dick you’ve ever seen in your life. You didn’t even notice his left eye being more ablaze than you’ve ever seen it before. “Is-Is it not go-“

“That” You pointed at it, a grin tugging at your lips, before pointing at your own loin. “In there”

“What?” he snorted and your eyebrows shot up, tone getting more demanding.

“That!” you repeated your motion. “In there! _Now_!”

“Holy fuck…” he whispered, once again blushing.

“Whatcha waiting for? Come here or I’ll do it myself!” Suddenly he was over you again, his pelvis pressed against yours, drawing a quiet moan from you. God damn it, you were drenched by now.

“Beg for it.” He whispered and you blinked before he ground his hips into yours.

“Wha-aaah?”

“ _Beg for it_!” You didn’t know that it was possible for you to get any more aroused but damn him, that low, guttural voice really turned you on, going straight down to your nether regions. So, obliging, you bit you lip and bated your lashes at him.

“Sans…”

“That’s not begging, that’s you being abnormally cute and using that luscious little pout to get what you want.” He pinched your lower lip, getting a bit of blood on the white bone, immediately licking it off. Still batting your lashes you reached down, grasping his hart member and giving him a few languine strokes.

“Come on Sans, I know you want me just as much as I want it too…”

“Now you are bargaining. I’m not hearing you beg!” Frustrated, you kicked your legs, shimming and accidentally grinding against him.

“Didn’t you wanna spoil me?”

“Fine, I’ll throw you a _bone_ ” He winked at you, but you only glared, until he hooked both thumbs into your underwear and pulled it off, slow enough to make you whine again in anticipation. “D-Damn it kitten, you’re not wet, you’re fucking soaked!” he gasped and you put on your pout again.

“S because o-of you teasing m-me so much!” You tilted your hips just the slightest bit, wriggling a bit. Carefully, Sans probed your entrance with one finger again before shoving two in, scissoring you to prepare you for his immense girth. You threw your head back, hissing through your teeth when you could feel a pressure in your lower abdomen. “Hnng, Saaaans~” Just when the pressure got almost too much, he stopped and pulled the fingers out, staring at them with hooded eyes.

How the fuck is he doing that? And don’t say magic!

You blushed furiously when he spread his finger, a string of your juices still connecting them, turning into an embarrassed shuffle, when his tongue came out to lick them clean.

“Shit _honey_ , and here I was, thinking that I could never find something that tastes better than ketchup. Guess I was wrong…” He grabbed his member and swirled it around the entrance to gather some liquid to lube up. “So, are ya ready for a trip to the…”

“If you are going to say bone-zone, I will start to live very a celibately life, starting this exact moment!”  He chuckled darkly at your words, grabbing your wrists and holding them up over your head.

“Love, you ain’t going anywhere, not when I’m about to _fuck_ you into the mattress!” He punctuated his words with one single thrust inside of you, making you bite your lip hard to hold back the loud moan. Carefully, he tugged at the abused skin, replacing it with one of his fingers, so you could suck on them, getting blood all over them. “Look at you, you bit yourself bloody.”

“Shuddup…” you mewled, wriggling your hips. “Sans, please move already…” You were already panting and gasping for air, fingers looking for something to hold onto. Careful, he took your hands and weaved them into his ribs, so you could grab them. Thankfully, you smiled at him, quickly throwing your head back again, when he started moving.

God, the drag of his cock was just so good, hitting all of your sweet spots and making it so hard, not to just moan and cry his name.

He kept his word, fucking you almost painfully slowly and wrecking you so deliciously. Your hands were clenching his ribs and he groaned. The slight burn of being so stretched just added to the pleasure and made you mewl again, but it wasn’t enough, it just wasn’t. You needed more, more of him.

His teeth were pressed against your lips once again, more heated now though and you parted your lips to let his tongue in, not even bothering to fight for dominance. When he pulled away after what seemed an eternity, there was blood from your lips on the white and you nothing more than a panting mess. His blue tongue licked over the fangs the sight on its own made you clamp down on him, never wanting to let go again.

It still wasn’t enough.

Suddenly, you could feel his fangs pressed against your throat, tongue sucking at you pulse and your breath hitched. Sans just chuckled deeply, his hips still moving antagonisingly slow, driving you mad.

“Sans, please…” You weren’t sure if he could hear you but it didn’t matter, you couldn’t form coherent sentences anyways. You just needed more, wanted to be his and oh god, you just wanted him to fucking pick up the pace already!

“ _Beg_.” He whispered again and you blushed feverently. Shit, did you say that out loud?   
It wasn’t that you were too proud to do what he asked for, just that you are such an awkward and shy person sometimes.

“S-Sans…” you whispered, face completely red and eyes averted. “Please, please, I need more o-of you, please… M-move faster” He turned your face towards him, so you could gaze at the blue and yellow flame, illuminating the room just enough, so you could see his sly grin.

“All you had to do is ask, Laney…”

“Wha-?” you couldn’t even respond properly, as he suddenly slammed into you, hard and making you choke. Finally, he picked up speed, making you mewl and pant softly, trying so hard to keep quiet, but it certainly wasn’t an easy task, getting so completely ravished by your… your what exactly? “Sans, yes, please, don’t stop… So good, please… please… Don’t stop…”

“I couldn’t even-fuck-stop if the goddamn house was on-shit-fire, kitten, you just feel too good.” He was panting too, making you just slightly proud, that he was enjoying himself so much. “Just look at you, absolutely wrecked. All because of me.” He was sucking at you neck again, paired with his sharp thrusts, you could feel the pressure come back, a coil winding and tightening. “Are you close? I can feel you tightening around me already.” You frantically nodded, unable to even speak anymore. “Come on, kitten, cum for me… Show me you’re mine”

You were drowning in pleasure, borderlining on pain, your heart beating so fast and so heavy with all the unspoken things you were locking away so carefully all the time.   
Suddenly, his fangs clamped down on your shoulder and the coil inside you snapped. You threw your head back, spine arching gracefully and _howling_ his name with a high pitched voice, not giving two fucks who could hear you come, let them hear, whatever. You were a big girl and allowed to have some fun, fuck, this was-

“That’s right, say my name, kitten…”

Wave after wave of pleasure rolled through you as you clamped down on his length, barely even noticing how he came inside of you, pumping you with his blue semen. He worked you through your orgasm with expertise, still lapping up the blood from your shoulder and growling so deeply that it made you shiver.

Once it was over, you flopped down on the bed again, panting heavily. You were sweaty, hair was stuck to your face and you couldn’t even move an inch. Sans carefully brushed the strands of hair off of your face before he kissed you, passionately yet slowly and intense. He pulled out, making you wince at the empty feeling and stared at your most private parts, a very smug and pleased look on his face, seeing you filled with his come, the glowing blue liquid leaking back out because it was so much. He pressed one finger in and grunted pleased as more dribbled out. You shuffled at the sensation, still so oversensitive and stimulated and whispered his name with a scruffy voice.

“Sans, come here…” You stretched out your arms and made a grabby-hands motion, coaxing him closer. The skeleton managed to tear away from your thoroughly ravished and well fucked pussy and crawled up to you, pulling you close. Snickering, you took his hand and put your lips around the finger that was still dripping with your mixed juices, swirling your tongue around it. It tasted both sweet and tangy, and you let go with a lewd popping sound, giggling at his face and the blue blush.  

“S-Shit kitten, that was… that was hot.” He admitted and you nuzzled closer, hiding your face at his sternum, holding back a yawn. Your lids were so heavy and it got consistently harder to keep your eyes open. Every time you blinked, they were closed a bit longer.

“Sans I-uhm.. I..” You couldn’t find the right words but he just pressed a kiss on your scalp, wrapping his arms around your delicate frame.

“Shhht… It’s okay, love.” He mumbled and one of his fingers traced the scars on your back. “One day, I’m gonna kill him for what he’s done to you…”

“What?” You stared at him with sleepy eyes and he just chuckled, kissing your forehead.

“Nothing. Try to sleep now” You didn’t want to drop it, but you were so exhausted that you let it slide for now. You’d have enough time to squeeze it out of him tomorrow morning. For now, you just wanted to sleep.   
You barely noticed the blanket covering you, already dozing off. Maybe this time, you wouldn’t have nightmares or waking up with a broken mind.   
Already asleep, your breaths became calm and your face peacefully and Sans held you just a bit closer, kissing your hair again. “I love you, Elaine.”

You didn’t answer him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this took forever to write....   
> LET'S SEE WHAT CHARA THINKS ABOUT IT; WILL WE?


	33. Welcome to hell, may I take your order?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PROTECTIVE CHARA IS PROTECTIVE, Y'ALL!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flangst? 
> 
>  
> 
> Flangst!

Sans watched you closely while you were sleeping, face buried at his chest and arms wrapped around him. Your face seemed so peaceful and serene, no trace of your usual exhaustion, you were trying so hard to hide. He felt incredibly smug at the sight of the numerous hickeys and bitemarks covering your neck, shoulders and bust, marking you as his.

As if you knew what he was thinking about, you cuddled closer, squishing your cheek at his sternum and looking incredibly cute in the process. The reddish-brown hair spiled over your back but couldn’t hide the coating of scars and abbreviations on your pale and delicate back. Lost in thought, he traced the biggest one, anger filling every last inch of his soul at the sight. How could anyone dare to damage you-in any way or form? You’ve suffered through so much already; he wouldn’t let anything hurt you anymore. Lovingly, he pressed his mouth against your scalp and immediately froze, as he heard the squeaking of the door as it swung open.

Slowly, he turned his head and found himself staring at a very, very smug Undyne, who was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed and about to split her head apart if she grinned any wider.

“Good morning~” She drawled and the skeleton glared, pulling the blanket up to cover your smaller frame. “I see, you had a very exciting night, Fufufufuf~”

“If you wanna say something Undyne, go ahead, but please do it quietly, I just got her to fall asleep again half an hour ago.”

“Well, I would be exhausted after such a workout as well~” The blue fish giggled and Sans just grunted.

“What do you want?”

“Fufufufu, well, originally I came up here to wake up Tiny for breakfast, they really can’t miss any, look at them, they are nothing but skin and bones-“ He squinted at her “-no offense of course, but hey, this is 100 times better. I can’t wait to tell-“

“You’re not gonna tell anyone, ‘ndyne!” you mumbled and grabbed the pillow to throw at them. Your best friend just caught the projectile bellowing a laugh.

“Good moooorning, sleeping beauty! Having fun?” Groaning, you pealed your skin off of Sans’ chest and glared daggers.

“I was sleeping, Undyne. So yes, I actually had fun for once, thank you very much.”

“Yeah, sleeping. I can see that on your neck.” Aggressively rubbing your eyes you sat up, pressing the blanket against your chest for your modesty.

“I didn’t say a single thing after I heard you having sex with Alphy last time I was staying over, so please, just shut the fuck up.” She just laughed and flopped down next to you and Sans making you yelp as you got launched a bit by the sheer force, landing in Sans lap-you were sure not by accident, you could distinguish his magic pretty well by now. You shot him a quick pout but he just shrugged and grinned.

“Yeah, but you have something called restraint, Laney. I don’t have that, so you are gonna get teased!” At the restraint-part, Sans covered up his laugh with a more-than-fake-caugh and mumbled something along the lines of “I didn’t see any restraint yesterday night”

“Oh shuddup you two, I hate you! You are horrible.” You squeaked.

“Didn’t hear any complaints last night.” Sans mumbled and nuzzled your neck, making you automatically loll it to the side for better access before blushing instantly and swatting at him, making the funny bzzzzz sound Ruby Rhod always does.

“Yeah, neither did I. It sounded more like _Yes, more, please, ah yes, hnnng_!” Undyne heckled and your blush grew even more.

“Oh my god, Undyne, I am breaking up with you, will you shut up!” You covered your face with your hands and just wanted to die before you linsed at her, your voice barely more than a squeak. “Did you actually….?”

“Naaaw, I’m just teasing you!” she laughed and slapped your arm. “All I heard was that last scream but I’m pretty sure I’m the only one and only because I was sleeping right on the other side of the wall. Well, sleeping, as a matter of speech, I was binge watching Yuri on ice, since Alphy already finished it and almost bursts because she couldn’t talk about it! Fufufufufu!” She quickly swatted your hands out of the way and pinched your cheeks. “Besides, you can’t break up! You’ve admitted that you looooove me!” She smirked and you rubbed your cheek.

“Wow, you told her that you love her and not me? You are breaking my heart here!” Sans sounded so overdramatically offended that it made you laugh but his face was pressed against your shoulder and a shudder ran down your spine.

“I didn’t…” you mumbled ashamed and took his hand, carefully squeezing it. “Can you please stop pinching my cheek, Undyne?”

“Nope! That’s the only bit of fat on your body so I will pinch it as often as I can! Well, besides your boobs and ass.” She turned towards Sans, completely ignoring your screams of protests. “Doesn’t she have great boobs, man?”

“Don’t you dare, Sans!”

“Yeah, they are the _breast_!”

“Oh my god!” you breathed; now going pale. “I can’t believe that I am actually still dealing with you guys!”

“You _tendon_ to say that a lot… Are we not _humerous_ enough for you?” You let out a long groan at Sans’ terrible pun yet still smiling. They were terrible, yes but you actually totally dig those. Your stomach rumbled but you gnored it like so often. He gently grabbed your waist and slit you off his lap, getting up. “Yo, when did you get dressed?” you mumbled, tugging at his shorts and he just shrugged.

“You’ve been preoccupied. And now, I’ll get you some food, Undyne’s right, you need to eat.”

“Wait, does that mean you are still naked under that?” Undyne squaled and playfully tugged at the blanket.

“Have fun _hooking up_ with the fish!” He winked at you as you pulled your covers closer, kicking Undyne in the leg to keep her at bay.

“Don’t leave me alone with the monster!” you begged just as playful and slipped out of the door. “Undyne, you are dead to me, your seehorse!” he heard you screeching and chuckled again as he climbed down the stairs, putting on the tank top, he had grabbed from the floor. He was still in a good mood, at least until he entered the kitchen and was immediately faced with a more than furious Chara.

“ _YOU_!” they roared, their red eyes almost sparking flames. “ _WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?_ ”

“What are you talking about?” the skeleton growled, stepping around them to open up the door of the fridge. The ghost stuck their head right through the door, making him jump slightly.

“ _You know exactly what I am talking about!_ ” they hissed, now completely stepping through the fridge. “ _What have you done?_ ” He furrowed his brow in confusion. “ _I really thought we were on the same page here, protecting her but I seemed to be wrong about you-once again! How selfish are you?_ ”

“I seriously have no idea what you are talking about. So if you excuse me, I have to get breakfast for my human-“

“ _SHE ISN’T YOUR HUMAN ANYTHING, SANS!_ ” They threw up their arms into the air. “ _SHE IS MY ELAINE AND YOU DECIDED TO HAVE SEX WITH HER! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA… HOW HARD IT WAS TO NOT RIP YOU INTO SMILING LITTLE SHREDS WHEN I WAKE UP AND INSTANTLY FEEL HER HAVING A NIGHTMARE JUST TO SEE YOU UP THERE AFTER…_ ” Their nostrils were flaring up so much, it was almost impressive.

“Welp, technically they aren’t your Elaine, exclusively and second, she kinda started it and…”

“ _YOU USED HER VULNERABLE STATE_!”

“I didn’t use her for anything!” he snapped back, getting seriously annoyed by the screaming hellspawn.

_“Oh, I can totally see that!”_

“Well, at least I am not leaching off of her body and soul!”

_“Ex-CUSE ME? I AM KEEPING HER ALIVE AND SAFE!”_

“OH, I CAN TOTALLY SEE THAT! How often did she almost get killed in the-let’s say-last month alone?”

“ _AND HOW MANY OF THOSE WERE CAUSED BY YOU, HMH? I DRAGGED HER SORRY ASS OUT OF THE TROUBLE YOU CAUSED THEM! She may have forgiven everything because she just loves everyone so much, but I haven’t!_ ” Chara huffed and brushed a strand of hair out of their face. “ _Just because she has feelings for you it doesn’t mean that I forget or forgive that you tried to kill them! Is this just some sick joke for you?_ ”

“Listen here, demon. The only reason I haven’t blasted your sorry little butt into outer space is because of Elaine, because for whatever reason, they seem to be a bit _attached_ to you and what you did is by no means her fault. All she ever did was show us kindness, something I can’t say about you, since I can remember at least 5 resets where you decided to kill everyone because you were _bored_. You killed my brother, you wretched little twerp and I will never forgive something like that! I tolerate you, that is all!”

“ _You tolerate me? YOU TOLERATE ME?_ ” They screeched, letting out an incredibly forced laugh. “ _I tolerated you but I never thought you’d actually go and fool around with Elaine! Do you realise what they have been through? What you could have done? She is fragile, you idiot!”_

“She’s not made of glass! Elaine is an adult and I’m pretty sure she can handle herself and besides.” A smug grin spread across his face and he shrugged. “If she wanted me to stop, she would have said anything and not begged for more, actually!” Chara turned completely red out of anger and he found himself face to face with the enraged spirit, only millimetres separating their faces.

“ _You are disgusting_!” They spat into his face, red anger-spots covering their face.

“And you are being an overprotective little prick! Howsabout you let them make their own decisions for once, you are not her Mother!” A bitter, thin lipped smile appeared on Charas face as they glared at the skeleton.

“ _The problem is, if you’ve already forgotten: I KINDA AM_!” They threw up their arms in the air, glaring daggers. Sans was about to answer with a snarky retort, as something behind them broke with the loud clirr of broken glass. Immediately, the two of them snapped around, just to see Undyne and you in the kitchen behind them. Your face was pale and completely shocked, your hands still raised where the cup, you were carrying downstairs, slipped your numb fingers. Undyne’s face was so obviously uncomfortable, it was almost painful.

“We… uh… heard yelling…” she admitted meekly, head tucking in between her shoulders. You simply turned around on your heel and walked out of the kitchen. Three voices were calling your name and running after you immediately. A skeletal hand grabbed your wrist, but you shook it off immediately.

“Hey, Laney, where are you going?”

“You knew?” was all that left your mouth. Sans face was contorted with guilt.

“I can explain, really!”

“You _knew_.” You whispered again, your eyes moving to Chara now. “I know I can’t run from you of all people, but right now, I wish, I could!” Without another word, you tuned again and left Toriels house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S KINDA SHORT BUT I REALLY WANT TO LEAVE YOU GUYS A BIT HANGING, BCS I AM EVIL LIKE THAT!


	34. La vie en rose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ya know what, this chaper I'mma do a bit of a crossover with my dear friend BlueUmbreon and their Fic "Murder is Easier With Two Killers"!  
> Their fic is actually super cool, you should tots go and read it!   
> I've waited to do this for a while and hey, why not now... <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grumpy Elaine is best Elaine

You were sitting on the grey suede couch, arms crossed and lips pressed together. As you heard the approaching steps, you let out a dramatic huff. A gentle finger brushed across your forehead, smoothing the lines between your furrowed brows.

“You are glaring again, dear.” Your aunts voice was soft and kind, a sweet smile on her face.

“I am not glaring!”

“You are glaring and sulking and pouting, love, I’ve known you for twenty four years now, I know your angry face!”

“I am only twenty three, Auntie Hel!” she snickered and patted your cheek.

“Oh, you’ve always been a little troublemaker, even back when you were still kicking my dear sister inside out” She gave you a wink and you made an overdramatic gagging sound.

“Yuck! Auntie, I don’t need to know that! And I didn’t kick Mum, Lizzy was the energetic one! I just laid there and didn’t move so the doctors though I died like 24 times. And then I strangled myself with the umbilical cord and everyone was already so done with my shit before I was even born.”

“Oh yeah, right! You were the very self-destructive child!”

“AUNTIE!” you screeched, your cheeks blushing. “No need to remind me of that!” She curled her lips in a teasing smile.

“Oh, but those are such lovely stories. Do you remember the time you fell off the rocking horse? Four generations of our family managed to play with it and you sat on it once and cut your forehead and chipped a tooth.” She snickered and you grabbed the pillow, hugging it tight, Lizzy always said that you looked like a little monkey or koala when you did that. “Or the time you walked through the same glassdoor-four times.”

“Yeah, mum replaced it with a wooden one after the guy at the hospital laughed at us for coming in again for the exact same reason.” You mumbled and your aunt wrapped her arms around you. A relieved sigh left your lips and you leaned closer, her mousy brown hair cascading over your shoulder. God, you’ve missed this so much.

“Exactly. Your father almost died of a heartattack every few minutes for the first 8 years of your life.” You let out a soft and sad chuckle. “Amélie knew you’d be alright, she had so much faith in you.” She pressed a kiss and top of your head. “Your parents have always been so proud of you, and so am I. You know that I love you very much, dear.” You looked up at her and she leaned her chin on your head.

“I love you too, Auntie, but why are you telling me this?” She gave a soft smile and you felt all fuzzy and warm inside, knowing that this side of your aunt was reserved for her family alone, so different from her harsh business side.

“Because something has happened and you are keeping it in again and sulking” You blew a strand of hair from your face.

“I am _not_ sulking!” you mumbled and she laughed, ruffling your hair.

“Of course you are. You are _always_ sulking when something’s happened. Every time you hurt yourself, you tried really hard to keep it together and not let anyone know. But you are moping so much, that it’s pretty obvious. And today you show up at my doorstep, covered in hickeys and just march up to my couch and abandon your ghost over there in the kitchen and keep being grumpy for two hours. So something has happened.” She gently patted your cheek. “Won’t you tell me what’s wrong?” You let out a sigh and leaned back into her, suddenly feeling like a twelve year old again.

“Auntie Hel, do you think I am weak?” you mumbled after a long silence and she blinked at you.

“What kind of question is that?” You just shrugged and hugged the massive cushion closer.

“Just theoretically, if the person closest to you-quite literally, because you are kinda stuck together-kept something from you, something really important and huge because they think that you are _weak_ and _fragile_ and can’t _handle_ it… But on the other side, they just tell other people, someone you like very much, because you need _protection_. And everyone just thinks you are so _delicate_ and made off _glass_ and can’t even handle if someone _frowns_ at you in the wrong way… What would you do?” For a while, your aunt looked at you, her brows furrowing ever so lightly. “I just feel.. I don’t know… Everyone treats me so carefully since the thing with Mom and Dand and Lizzy and then Hugh and everything… I know, they mean well but I feel so weak and awful. I never wanted to be a damsel in distress and look at me now.”

“Yes, you are a damsel, you are in distress but that doesn’t mean that you can’t handle yourself.” Surprised you blinked at her. “I think we’ve had a conversation like this before. You remember what I told you, about other people seeing you as small and fragile and cute and defenceless?” A smile tugged at the corners of your mouth.

“Go along with it, don’t correct them. And when they least expect it…”

 _“Blow them up.”_ You finished together and she booped your nose.

“Of course, don’t actually blow them up, that is very illegal-“

“Rich coming from you, leader of Ebott City’s biggest familia.”

“Yes, but I don’t go around and blow up stuff, I am more sophisticated than that. I have people to do that for me! But yes, now I’ve sidetracked. What I wanted to say is-don’t refuse your friends protection and worries, dear, they just want to help you. And no one knows exactly just how strong you are, that what makes you so dangerous. You’ve managed to survive so many terrible things but you’ve always gotten back up on your feet. Don’t let something like that get to you, let them protect you, if they feel like they have to, less work for you. And when the right moment strikes, show them just who exactly this Elaine Asra Winters is, they are dealing with right now.” Her nose wrinkled just like yours as she smiled. She looked so much like your mother, but then again, they were twins.

“I don’t know, isn’t that a bit… deceiving?”

“Why, it’s not like you are acting differently. Never change for someone, and if you change, do it for yourself and nobody else. You know yourself best, despite what everybody might think, the person closest to you, is you. All I’m telling is, to just… know when to keep quiet and when to speak up. There are times when you have to compromise but if you can’t… then don’t.” She smiled at you again, her wrinkles deepening. “But I understand how you feel. I’ve been just as much of a hothead in my youth and your mum was even worse.” You adored the way how she said “mum”, almost swallowing the harsh middle letter and keeping the m’s sharp and short, sounding a lot more like _mumm_ that the commonly pronounced _maaaaaam_ you usually heard. It warmed your heart, hearing someone else besides yourself speaking like that. Her irish accent was so much thicker than yours though, her voice always soft and warm when she spoke to you. “You know what you need now?” Auntie Hel patted your knee and brushed a strand of hair out of your face. “Some hot chocolate. Not the pulvery, water mess these people drink, I mean real and good melted chocolate in milk with a big heap of whipped cream and sprinkles on top, like my mama used to make it for me and Emmy. I know how much you love your chocolate.”

“Can I have coconut milk instead of normal one though? I always get tummy aches from normal milk” She patted your cheek and got up from the couch and you folded your legs underneath you.

“That goes unsaid. You’ve never taken well to any milk besides coconut. You should really get yourself tested if you are lactose intolerant, dear.”

“It’s just when I drink milk or eat yogurt. I don’t mind it in, I don’t know… ice cream or so. Maybe I am just spoiled with the coconut one by now.” She snickered and her warm hand lovingly gliding over your hair.

“You know, in moments like this, I feel like you are still my sweet and innocent baby niece and not this strong and fierce Valkyrie. I cherish these moments.”

“Me too, auntie, me too…” you admitted with a sad smile, eyes gazing down again. Your Aunt booped your nose with a long and slender finger before wrapping you in her shawl, instantly warming you up so much as you pulled it closer.

“And now, your cocoa!” As she walked away you closed your eyes and inhaled the scent of gunpoweder and cookie dough and instantly felt home again.

You’ve missed this so much.

Sighing, you cuddled more into the shawl, the calming sent all around you and smiled with closed eyes. You could fall asleep right here and now.

It was quiet but you felt the slight shift in the air.

“ _Do you hate me, Elaine?_ ” Eyes still closed, you leaned back, smile widening. There were many things you could say right now, telling them that, No, of course you didn’t hate them and that you weren’t actually mad, but rather dramatic for dramatic purposes as you left to vent. You decided to go with the truth instead.

“You do realise, that I’ve known for a long time, do you? And that’s not why I got mad in the first place?” When they didn’t respond, you opened your eyes with curled lips to be greeted with the ethereal appearance of Chara standing in front of you, mouth hanging open and huge eyes, big as a supperplate.

“ _You-You knew_?” they spluttered and you snickered. “ _But-But how?_ ”

“It wasn’t exactly rocket science, you know? I’ve always had a sneaking suspicion, ever since we met”

 _“I think I need to sit down for a second.”_ You pointed with your chin, like saying _go ahead_ and they sat down on the fluffy carpet, legs crossed.  “ _What gave it away? I tried so hard at being careful…”_

“Many things.” You took a deep breath and turned your head to look outside the window, pulling your legs up on the couch. “After we escaped the void, you might recall, I wasn’t remembering everything that has happened, my brain was pretty much in shambles. But then again, I just died, got stuck in the void for three months, woke up, died _yet again_ -I am doing an awful lot of dying here-, found out that I tore our family apart, and then was basically blackmailed into an extremely abusive relationship for four years. I had every reason to repress some things, as unhealthy as it might be. I didn’t even realise that you were with me. And then you got more active as time went on, yada, yada, yada, we’ve heard this story a million times by now. Once you did start to pop up again though, I started to remember. And that’d got me thinking. Like, who you were and who I was, and what we were to each other. There must’ve be some form of connection between us. After all we did look exactly the same. I mean, that could have been a total coincidence but let’s be for real, it was completely implausible. Second of all, you stuck to my soul, even more that to Frisks. And then I started to remember-my memories, your memories and then some of Frisks. You were never really able to control their body, at least not to the extend you’ve been with mine in the past. Only if they’d sell their soul to you. I’m glad they didn’t though… That got me thinking even more. Why were you able to control _me_? Why are we so compatible? Why did we get stuck in the void, the exact same time when Frisk let go of you and I died? Why did we manage to escape the void-but only after we did it as one? Why can you hold my soul together, Chara? Awful lot of coincidences, innit? What makes this so special? I couldn’t stop thinking about it, I was so close to figuring it out but it always slipped away, like I was trying to catch fog with my hands. And then I overheard Sans tell Papyrus and Frisk that bedtime story one day, because they both love it. You know, the one about you and Asriel and how Azzy took your soul. That was the moment I stopped _thinking_ and started _realising_. There is absolutely nothing special about me. Everything that is, comes from you and Azzy. I should have figured sooner, of course Asra is the first thing that pops to everyone’s mind and what I am named after because that is literally _all I am._ ” Your smile turned bitter for a second and you touched your chest, right where your soul was hiding. “This is yours isn’t it? The soul that’s made up from yours and Azzys? It was foolish of me to think that it could be me, when instead, this is your story. I am not mad at you though, I never could be. I got that from Asriel, I guess. Always the big softie, always the crybaby. But I am not mad. I understand why you wouldn’t tell me, I would not have understood. I was a different person back then, very different. I had to find these answers on my own. It was good that I did the way I did. What I did not understand was why you would just go around and tell someone else, Sans of all people. You two hate each other with no abandon. I know why you did it, so I could be protected, but you need to understand…” You turned your head towards Chara and they flinched at the burning fire in your steel hard burgundy eyes. There was something inside of it, they’ve never seen before. “I can handle the truth better than you think. I am not some weak little girl. We all have a past, and again, ‘m no different. I had a past and it made me who I am today. You should seriously stop underestimating me.” You smiled at them and it was as if the sun broke through the clouds before you got up, weaving your fingers together and stretching until the joints in your back popped. “I’ll give you a really hot minute to think about it while I’ll go and check up on my hot coca.” Still smiling you got up and made your way to the kitchen, casually sweeping over Charas hair as you walked by.

When you entered, you crooked your head at the sight. Your aunt was at the stove, cooking up your drink but at the table were two girls, one of the sitting at the chair, the other one standing, leaning over the table and holding up a map of the city.

“Am I busting in on a business meeting?”

“Oh, Elaine, I just wanted to call you in, your hot chocolate is almost ready. Don’t worry about those two, that’s Alice and….” You’ve already stopped listening to her, mustering the odd pair. The one your aunt’s called Alice was tall and lanky, completely dressed in black, her slightly curled hair a shiny black that changed from a hint of blue to purple and pink every time she moved, it was mesmerising. Intelligent, sharp eyes watched you with the brightest crystal blue you’ve ever seen in your entire life and her lipstick intimidated you. Every woman that would just casually pull off deep purple lipstick, should be feared. A holster with guns and knives was poking out underneath her mid-thigh coat. The other was didn’t match Alice at all. She seemed a lot more bubbly and happy, cheerily smiling at you. But damn, those biceps. If you weren’t team biceps after Civil War, you definitely were now.

What was her name again? Damn it, you didn’t listen to your aunt.

“Uuuh, high guys!” you waved awkwardly. “You don’t look like an Alice though. I’ll call you Dark.” The girl next to her snorted and the woman in black cocked an eyebrow.

“Dark? Really? Why? Because I wear black?”

“No, because of your sunny aura. Look at rose over there, she thinks it’s funny.” The second girl, now dubbed Rose stopped mid-laugh and gasped. You just shrugged, feeling incredibly smug that you got away without admitting that you simply didn’t knew her name.

“That is a terrible nickname!”

“Oh boy, Imma stick with that now, that’s hilarious”

“Fine, then I’ll just call you Darky for all eternity!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!” You chuckled as you watched the two woman bicker at each other but there was a certain glimmer in their eyes that made it obvious that they were pretty close.

“What’cha working on, Auntie?” She gave you a pointed look, smiling to herself.

“I just told you, weren’t you listening?” You blushed at the loving scold and took the cup she was offering you, taking a huge gulp. Damn, this was the best. “Well, as I was saying, my friend Alice here-or Dark as you dubbed her, dear, is the head of another familia in town, but rather small. We’ve been working close lately. They are planning a heist right now but ran into some troubles and we are trying to figure it out somehow right now. It has proven itself infinitely more difficult as previously assumed though.”

“Are you sure it’s okay to tell her, Hel?” Alice asked and you rolled your eyes. Your aunt just laughed quietly.

“There isn’t anyone more appropriate to tell, dearest. Elaine is my lovely niece” She pinched your cheek adoring and you scrunched up your face. “Maybe she is able to provide a new point of view even.”

“But… she looks so innocent?”

“And your friend looks like she’s an actual representation of your soul, but who am I to judge, Rose?” Alice snorted and tried to cover it up as a sneeze.

“Oh shuddup, Darky!”

“I hate you so much.” Alice said dryly before turning back to you. “So, what the gig?”

“How’zabout you tell me first?”

“Well, not to be too circumlocutory right here but we are planning to break into this huge warehouse since they have something of huge value for us-the less you know, the better, trust me-but we can’t get in because the security measurements are so high. We can take out the guards no problem but turning off all of the alarm-systems and security devices at once is kind of impossible.”

“Just cutting the power of them all at once doesn’t work since they run on different distributors and once you turn off one, the other ones sent a distress signal to the police immediately. And we can’t just cut the power to the whole district, the hospital is in the same one and we don’t hurt innocents, even though we are criminals, we aren’t ruthless!” your aunt huffs.

“Do you have any ideas?” your voice was surprisingly calm and collected.

“Yeah.” Rose chirped happily. “Either we snuck someone in and let him overwrite the whole system but that would require great skill and a lot of time. Or we risk the security sending a distress call and sneak in and out before the police arrive.” Slowly, you took a sip of the hot chocolate, fiddling with the adorable bow holding your high ponytail in place. You really did look ten times more innocent than usually.

“Why don’t you use a small EMP?” Rose blinked at you and Alice huffed while your aunt just cocked an eyebrow in interest.

“Because EMP’s are really hard to get and super expensive. We can’t just get one, especially since everyone will immediately know what we did? And I have no need in being placed on a watchlist. Besides that, it would take too long until it’s here.” A cross expression ghosted over your face, effectively scrunching it up.

“Then… make one yourself?”

“Oh yeah, sure, just make one. I’m sorry, I don’t know about you but we don’t have someone that can just-“ Alice clicked her fingers. “make one. We are criminals, not rocket scientists.”

“It’s pretty easy actually. You need an iron pipe as core and thick copper wire to wrap around tightly. Then wire it up with something with a decent amount of voltage-I think a car battery should be enough to hook up a small warehouse-and jumpstart the core, that way an electromagnetic pulse will be emitted and should fry everything around. I’d say like… 2-4 blocks if it’s a really strong one. It will not only kill all of the security but also every kind of phone, gun wiring etc. should make it easier to handle the guards as well.” You finished your cup just as the doorbell rang and your aunt put the rag down, gently nuzzling your cheek with one hand as she walked by. You knew where you’ve got that habit from. Alice and Rose just looked at you both in awe and complete confusion.

“That actually might work…”

“Where did you pick that stuff up?” You simply showed off a gentle smile, almost blinding them. You could pick up the conversation in the hallway and stiffened a bit. Oh, this would be highly unpleasant.

“Is she here, Helvetica?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I've been terribly sick for a hot minute (because frankly, I have the immune system of a used make-up wipe) so if this is shit, please excuse me.


	35. One last dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am sick so Elaine has to suffer with me, once more!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter before the plot starts, Muhahahahaha  
> Oh yeah, and here is a link to the music that inspired something later on! I love it, it's so beautiful <3  
> (And I am so excited to cosplay Ballora as well xD)  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LBlgLbeqpYo

~~Help me~~ Just as you heard the voice at the door, a sharp sting shot through your head and pain exploded behind your eyes like a firework. It felt like fire but from the outside, you seemed calm and collected, only slightly furrowing your brow and pinching the bridge of your nose with your thumb and middle finger, the cold skin oh so cooling on your heated ~~help~~ face.

“Yo, everything alright?” Rose asked and you just slightly shook your head, making up any bullshit excuse.

“Yeah, I’m just not overly fond of what follows.”

“What follo-“

“Eh, _mera_!” Curly stomped by the two girls with the full force of an angered latina and sniped her fingers against your forehead.

“Fuck, you know that hurts!”

“ ‘ou deserve it, idiot!” she hissed and flicked her fingers again. Alice behind her snickered and you shot her an annoyed glance.

“Curly, what are you doing here?”

“Undyne called and told me ‘ou ran off again! And that your bone-friend, whatever that’s supposed to mean, is highly distressed. They couldn’t find you”

Oh shitballs.

“And that you had a fight with Chara and Sans. And that you are probably deeply distressed but knowing you, you’re just being a bratty bitchy overly melo dramaqueen right now!” Overacting, you gasped loudly and placed your hand on your chest.

“Oh my god, Carmen Cantabella, I deeply offended that you would even consider me being an overdramatic little bitch. Because honestly…” you shoulders slouched, tone now sombre and hushed. “I’ve been one. I’ve grown sloppy and spoiled and whiny and dramatic. I-I just got mad and overreacted again. I had no reason. Sans didn’t deserve that.” Your friend huffed and gave you a tiny smile.

“And Chara?”

“ _I deserved it!”_ they called from the living room and you glared at the door. Of course they’d be evesdropping.

“Shuddup Chara. Not making this any better. And we talked it out”

“Did she mope?” your childhood friend and you puffed your cheeks.

“No, I didn’t-“

“Yes.”

“ _Yes.”_

“Yep.”

“uh-uh!”

“ _For almost 2 hours_ ” Four different people answered the question and you could feel the blush spread across your cheeks, peppering the pale skin.

“Oh _, come on_ you guys! I wasn’t that bad!” you huffed.

“You are an idiot, Ellie-bean, you know that?” Curly sighed and brushed an especially tight ringlet behind her ear. “But it’s alright. It’s good that you’ve grown a bit softer since we were teens and you don’t try to toughen everything out. Let people help you!”

“I don’t want any help!”

“You never wanted any ‘elp. God, stop being so goddamn stubborn! Just take it. I know you are sorry, I can see it but curse you and your pride. Elaine, you’ve suffered through some pretty harsh things but they are over. Just fucking allow ‘ourself some happiness for fucks ‘ake!”

“I am trying but…” You pinched the ~~help me~~ bridge of your nose again and fought your rising stomach down once again. ~~please~~ “It’s not that easy!”

“I know. But keep trying. And now come on, we are leaving!”

“But I don’t wanna go hoooome, I’ll have to apologise to Sans and deal with life, lemme stay with my aunt and be a little girl.” The latina looked at you, her eyebrows arched so high that they almost disappeared underneath her hair.

“I’m not taking you back. Besides, Undyne told me Sans is at work, they needed ‘im in. And I didn’t plan to drop you off there either, you are coming with me. Did you already forget, today’s the 28th, you promised me you’d come over and-“ suddenly her forehead wrinkled and her nostrils flared. “What is wrong?”

“Wh-what?” you asked and stopped in your movement.

“You did it ~~Help us~~ again, that is the fifth time now you’ve pinched the bridge of your ~~make it stop~~ nose during our conversation and squinted a bit, you never ~~stop him~~ do this.” Her hair almost smacked you square in the face as she snapped her head around. “Chara, come here!”

 _“Yes?”_ the ghostly form popped up next to you and startled you so much, that you lowkey swore like a sailor and threw the closes thing to you-a spoon-right through them. “ _Are you fucking serious right now?”_

“I told you, don’t scare me like that, Jesus fucking Christ on a wheelie bin!” Alice and Rose got up slowly, one of them extremely vary, the other overly excited.

“Is that a ghost?” Rose screeched excited. Chara shifted her upper body to the side and gave them a thin lipped smile.

_“Actually, I’m a demon that’s possessing her but don’t let that stop you!”_

“That’s so fucking metal” Alice muttered and Curls swatted at her, shushing her up.

“Bzzzz, Chara!” They were practically the only one that pronounced their name with a _soft K_ instead of a hard _Ch-sound_ , like Charly or so, besides yourself and Chara themselves, though for different reasons. “Quick, since when is Laney doing this weird thing where she pinches the bridge of her nose?”

“Curly, what the fuck are you-“

 _“About three weeks, maybe a month. It got worse the past two days.”_ You shut your mouth with an audible clack, completely taken aback. That was exactly the timespan where your nightmares about the other versions of you started. Did you really do that without noticing it?  
Curly looked at you expectantly.

“So?”

“So?”

“What is going on?”

“It’s nothing, I just have a bit of a headache” you mumbled and tried to slip past her, something in your ~~run~~ stomach burning like a huge block of ice, twisting it. Was it guilt? ~~No~~ Or something else? ~~hide~~

Your childhoodfriend blocked your way with her arm, inspecting you closely.

“Your eyes are glassy…” Carefully, you dived under her arm, a cocky smile on your lips.

“ ‘s nothing, really. I’m just tired, because I didn’t sleep too well lately. Once I get a full night of sleep, it will be gone.”

“Bullshit.” Curls hand landed on your forehead but you swatted it away. “How are you feeling? Temperature wise?”

“I don’t know, a bit chilled, nothing too bad. Your cold hands are not helping though.” You shivered as if to make a point and backed away again, rubbing your forearms uncomfortably. You just wanted a moment of quiet right now to think and sort things back. The pulsing ache behind your _ ~~it's over~~_ eyes got stronger but you decided to ignore it.

_Not now, not here._

You knew that feeling too well, but it usually only happened when you were sleeping- _dreaming_. But never like this, not when you were awake ~~ _awake_~~.

“Elaine, you are practically burning up.” Curlys voice was stern yet concerned. Typical doctor’s behaviour, Dad always did that t- _wait what?_

 _No, that wasn’t right? Were those your memories?_ ~~ _No_~~ _Or someone else’?_ ~~ _Mine_~~ _They must be yours?_ ~~_Mine_~~ _W_ _hy wouldn’t they? But no, your Dad wasn’t a doctor. He was a scientist, wasn’t he? What about your mom? She was a famous dancer, just like you, right?_ _ ~~J~~ ~~ust~~ ~~like you~~_ ~~ _!_~~ _No! You didn’t dance, you never had the talent_ ~~_talent_ ~~ _! And your mom was a reporter until her eardrums blew out_ _~~blew out~~ _ _and she started to work with your aunt. What was going on?_ ~~_Help_~~ _T_ _his was your brain, your memories and your mind. You are the one in control_ ~~ _one in control_~~ _no one else! Right? ~~Help me~~_

 _Right?_ ~~_He’s coming_ ~~

you weren’t so sure anymore and honestly, that is _fucking_ scary. _ ~~Help~~_

“I’m fine, really. I know what you wanna say, but I am not getting sick. I don’t get sick. Ever. Period. Let’s go, we have a date with your fiancé. ” ~~ _Run_~~

“Pequeña, I know you hate it but…” she sighed. “Fine, where’s your jacket?”

“Didn’t bring one.” You crossed your arms and her eyebrows arched once again.

“Excuse me? You drove here without a jacket?”

“ _No, we walked_.” Chara admitted, lips pressed together. “ _But she wouldn’t listen to me._ ”

“Backstabbing little bitch…” you mumbled but shrugged. “Yeah, fine, but whatever, it wasn’t that cold.”

“It’s -8° outside.”

“A bit chilly maybe.”

“You are insane!” Curly grabbed your elbow and dragged you to the doorway. “And you are sick, I’m getting you home now. _Doctors_ order!”

“Curly please-I am not si-“ The weird feeling you’ve tried to push back down ~~help~~ returned at full force. ~~fight~~

You vomited on the carpet.

~~_He’s coming_ ~~

_You could hear the loud chatter of voices outside in the giant room. They sounded happy, excited, as they should be! They were going to see the last performance of Primaballerina Asra. People were bashing each other’s heads in, just to catch a glimpse of you dancing. And you loved it. You loved the attention and you loved to dance, there was nothing better in the world. Who cares, that you literally had to kill yourself to get were you were now? Who cares that Chara is gone? Who would be so dumb to let them stay? Not when they would be so much better as a part of you, fuelling your power? Nobody knew, nobody cared. There was only place for one Asra out there in this timeline. You were the only one with a hybrid soul so why not use it, you wouldn’t lose it again!  
This was your stage. And you loved it _

_Then why are you crying?_

_It was your last dance, your last performance, but no one knew yet. How could you tell anyone, your friends? Gosh, Sans and Papyrus and Rose and Alice and Auntie Hel and Curls and.. just everybody? They loved you so much and you loved them. Would they miss you? Or would they just move on? No, they loved you. How could you tell them? How do you tell someone something like this? It’s not easy. And it would make their suffering only greater._

_How do you tell the people you love, that you were going to die tonight?_

_But you’ve come to terms with it already. You all died, eventually. It was what you were born for, to die. You’ve stalled too long now so why wait any longer?_

_You just wanted One. Last. Dance._

_Frustrated, you crumpled up the paper in your hand with the fatal message and threw it into the corner of your dressing room with an enraged scream. Panting, you looked at yourself in the mirror._

_Your ginger hair was pulled up into a tight bun, only a few ringlets framing your face, the decorative gems and the crown reflecting the light oh so beautifully. Your make up was perfect and made you look like a doll. You adored it for as it showed you as what you really were. You also adored your dress, you’ve always loved the flat pancake-tutus. The bodice clung nicely to your body and the gems sparkled. Not to sound conceited, but you were gorgeous._

_Except for that one tear, that rolled over your cheek, despite the cold and stone hard expression, that was your face. Rigorously, you wiped it away, not to ruin your stunning make up and grabbed the blush to patch up the intense, red circles on your cheeks. As you put the brush down with slender and delicate fingers, the door to your gaderobe opened and the stage assistant poked her head in._

_“Hey, you are almost up, you ready?”_

_“Yes, I am ready.” Your voice was small yes still soft and warm, like honey and you followed her outside. People were waiting for you and the ballroom was already dark. Taking a deep breath, you stepped out and took your place in the spotlight, waiting for the curtains to draw. This would be your last dance; you had to make it count. Once the music began and the room opened up for you, your mind went blank._

_And then you danced._

_You danced like never before in your life. Your mind was completely empty, there was nothing more important than the movement of your body, contorting oh so beautifully to the grand piece. You were telling a story, a young girl, that fell in love but eventually died out of another’s jealous rage. No one knew that this was your story._

_Attitude derriere, avant, pirouette, brisé, arabesque, jump, land, grand plié, Foueté en entournant en dehors, chasse, pirouette en arabesque…_

_You could feel the tears falling from your eyes as you literally danced your heart out, the bright deep blue light of your soul of integrity illuminating your chest with such an immense heat, that you feared that you might burn from the inside. But you kept dancing, despite your panting breath, the beating of your heart, endless aches and the tears._

_Chasse, brisé, pirouette à la seconde, la hauteur…_

 

The soft shaking of someone picking you up, was what woke you, eventually. Still groggy, you pried your eyes open, looking at Sans. It took you a few moments to understand where, when and who you were.

“S-ans?” you whispered, as he entered his room, carefully placing you on his bed. God, you looked so small right now.

“Why were you sleeping on the couch?” His voice was shushed and you glanced at the clock next to the bed.

_2:34am_

Oh, so that’s why. Papyrus was probably sleeping. Sans had dark circles under his eyes, it must have been one hell of a shift. Or it was because he worried about you so much, that he couldn’t even take his usual naps. You’ve been so selfish, you didn’t deserve him. You didn’t deserve anything.

“Curly brought me here after she gave me a knock in for my stupidity…” Your voice was so hoarse.

“Didn’t you have your date today? You know, the whole wedding thing?” You wanted to shake your head but that only made it spin even more.

“No, we… shifted. Said I should go home and sleep. You weren’t here and I didn’t want to break into your room. ‘m used to the couch…” He chuckled and brushed a strand of hair aside.

“You can be such a knucklehead sometimes, you know that?” You only chuckled and pulled his sleeve.  It took him a second before he understood and slipped into bed with you, yet still keeping a respectful amount of distance.

“Sans… I’m sorry. I-“ gently, he put a finger against your lips to shut you up. The white lights in his eyes seemed to burn so bright.

“We can talk tomorrow…” You nodded and noticed your blinking taking longer, your breaths heavy and long, so burning hot. God, you were so scared all of a sudden, a tear leaking from your eye. Your hand grabbed his shirt, though it took you a few attempts because your hand was shaking so much. “Laney? What’s wrong?” His hand was on your forehead, _god_ , it felt so cold, pure bliss. “Woah, you are hotter than Pyrope, are you alright.” You didn’t answer him, your head was spinning and hurting and oh god, what was this never ending music and sadness? Another tear rolled over your cheek and a sob fell from your lips. “Laney, talk to me! This isn’t normal, isn’t it?Laney? Elaine!” He was shaking you now in his embrace but you couldn’t react, couldn’t move. There was only music and fear and tears and heat. You were burning. It hurt so much, you just wanted it to end.

~~“ _Help me…_ ”~~

 

_There was nothing but your dance. And when it ended, it hurt more than anything else, you’ve ever felt before. A shaking sob escaped your rosy lip, drowning in the wave of the biggest applause in your life and you muffled it with one hand, waving with the other one, before reluctantly leaving the stage. With every step, your chest felt heavier and heavier._

_The second you stepped backstage, there were so many hands, begging to touch you or hug you and endless barrage of people trying to talk to you, but you couldn’t hear them. All you could hear was the music, still placing in your head. Smiling the brightest smile of your life, you asked for a bit of privacy, because yes, even you could get exhausted after two hours of excessive dancing, at least to the point of what you just did. Everyone else would have broken down already, but not you, you were different. There was no one out there that could do the things, you could do._

_Once you were back in your gaderobe and sat down on the chair in front of the mirror, the tears came back once more and you buried your head in your arms._

_“Elaine…” surprised, you looked up, to meet Sans’ face. He seemed to be in disbelief, in his hands a piece of crumpled up-oh!_

_“I am sorry, Sans!” Quickly, he stepped towards you, hugging you close and pressing a kiss on your scalp. You were clinging to his jacket._

_“How long have you known.”_

_“He-he sent it tonight, so… a few hours. I couldn’t tell…”_

_“You didn’t have to. I watched you dance. It broke my heart”_

_“Not just yours. But it has to happen. If he doesn’t do it then one of… then one of_ them _will come. You know it, Sans. I can’t let that happen. They won’t get this soul.” He pressed another kiss on your hair._

_“I know.”_

_“I wish we’ve had more time…”_

_“I know… Me too, love”_

_“Sans…?”_

_“Hmmh?”_

_“I love you.” How ironic, that you could only tell him what you truly felt, once the end was near._

_It’s sad, isn’t it?_

_Once the faint knock on your door came, he was already gone, everything said and done. You put on your best smile, completely banishing any thought from your mind. Rose poked her head in, as sweet and bubbly and loud and rude and crude as always._

_“Hey, I am here to pick you up! Ya ready?” You gave your favourite tutu a last look, sparking sadly on the hook in front of the mirror, as if it was waiting for your return for tomorrows show but knew, that you wouldn’t come. This was goodbye then. You wanted the evening with Rose to go well, before it all ended. If she would be sad to hear, what has happened, after she left? Probably._

_“Yes, I am ready.”_

Sans was shaking you, still holding you in his arms and frantically calling out your name. You felt so limb but at least you did feel something else now. The spinning has ebbed down, the last tear rolling over your cheek. Shaking, you took in a deep, rattling breath.

“Where am I?”

“October 28th, 201x, We and Chara had a fight, you are in my bedroom. You passed out completely and started crying.” He seemed so desperate and you couldn’t help but touch his face with featherlike touches, that made him shiver. “What happened?”

“I had a nightmare” did your lips always feel so dry?

“A nightmare or _nightmare_?” You smiled faintly and took a deep breath, swallowing some of the vomit that crawled up its way up your throat.

“They are getting stronger.” You admitted; your voice nothing more than a soft whisper in the dark. He pulled you closer, burying his face at the crook of your neck.

“I know but… we’ll find a way to make them stop.” A soft smile appeared on your lips, as you pulled him down to the mattress with you, resting your head on his chest, arms tightly wrapped around him.

“I know you will.” You didn’t have the heart to tell him, that it might be too late by then. You were slowly running out of time.  
It was quiet now.

Music has stopped playing forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> actually cried during some parts of this, the way I picture other Elaine dancing in my head was just so emotional :( But I love it (*cough* fun fact: I always wanted to be a ballerina, but I am too tall :( *cough*


	36. A loving embrace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah. there will be blood. and tears.  
> whoops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahahahaha

Your phone buzzed violently on the wooden plate of your working desk and you sniffled, quickly grabbing a tissue before opening the message.

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:02**

How long do you plan on working today, so I can pick you up for your surprise party?

**[Laney] 16:02**

Did you just spoil my surprise silvester party for me????? :OOOOOO

**[Laney] 16:02**

</3 </3 </3 :’( :’( :’(

**[Laney] 16:02**

;___; :(

**[Laney] 16:02**

Undyne will be pissed that you told me

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:03**

Well, she shouldn’t have spoiled the ending of Breaking Bad for me then

**[Laney] 16:03**

BB ended in 2013, wow, how far behind are you

**[Laney] 16:03**

Where did you live?

**[Laney] 16:03**

Under a rock

**[Laney] 16:04**

Hahah

**[Laney] 16:04**

That was so bad. I am sorry. I am a horrible person. You should lock me up and throw away the key

**[Laney] 16:06**

;) If ya wanna

**[Laney] 16:06**

WAIT NO, FORGET THAT!

**[Laney] 16:06**

WE WERE TALKING ABOUT A PARTY?

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:07**

Wow, you are really smooth sometimes

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:07**

Cute ;)

**[Laney] 16:08**

I hate you.

**[Laney] 16:09**

And also: AAAAAW, U SPOILED THE PARTY FOR ME :( I WANTED TO ACT REALLY SURPRISED AND NOT LIKE PAPYRUS TOLD ME LIKE 5 TIMES ALREADY BY ACCIDENT!!!!!

**[Laney] 16:09**

I EVEN PRACTISED MY SURPRISED FACE IN FRONT OF THE MIRROR, LOOK!

**[Laney] 16:10**

-1 Attachment-

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:11**

You are such a dork sometimes.

**[Laney] 16:12**

S h o o k

**[Laney] 16:12**

-1 Attachment-

**[Bonehead ;) <3]**

Stop meme’ing me, that is my job!

**[Laney] 16:13**

I shall never stop!

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:13**

Okay, okay, Me’em

**[Laney] 16:14**

Did you just…

**[Laney] 16:15**

Get out

**[Laney] 16:16**

Also, I’ll call you 1ce Im done here, I wanna be done soon anyway

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:17 **

I still cant believe the toasteroven made you work on NYE

**[Laney] 16:18**

Don’t be mad but he actually didnt. I just got bored.

**[Laney] 16:18**

Whoopsies

**[Laney] 16:19**

I hate sitting still

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:20 **

…..   
Wow.   
But at least you are confident enough to not be afraid of double texting

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:20 **

Please don’t kill me

**[Laney] 16:20**

Who

**[Laney] 16:20**

The fuck

**[Laney] 16:20**

Is scared

**[Laney] 16:20**

Of double

**[Laney] 16:20**

Texting

**[Laney] 16:20**

Bitch

**[Laney] 16:20**

I

**[Laney] 16:20**

Will

**[Laney] 16:20**

Fucking

**[Laney] 16:20**

Text

**[Laney] 16:20**

You 50 times

**[Laney] 16:20**

If I feel like it

**[Laney] 16:20**

Like damn

**[Laney] 16:20**

Pay attention to me

**[Laney] 16:21**

Buzz buzz

**[Laney] 16:21**

Who could that be?

**[Laney] 16:21**

Buzz buzz

**[Laney] 16:21**

Guess who

**[Laney] 16:21**

Its me again motherfucker

**[Laney] 16:21**

Im gorgeous and awesome

**[Laney] 16:21**

**Who wouldn’t want to text me?**

[Laney] 16:21

I have memes and selfies

**[Laney] 16:21**

All you need!

**[Laney] 16:22**

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**[Laney] 16:22**

-1 Attachment-

**[Laney] 16:22**

-1 Attachment-

**[Laney] 16:22**

-1 Attachment-

**[Laney] 16:22**

-1 Attachment-

**[Laney] 16:22**

Buzz buzz

**[Laney] 16:23**

<3

**[Laney] 16:23**

;*

**[Laney] 16:27**

Buzz buzz

**[Laney] 16:28**

For old times sake

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:29**

Welp, that’s it, NYE is cancelled for you

**[Laney] 16:31**

Don’t make me spoiler Sherlock for you

**[Bonehead ;) <3] 16:31**

Don’t make me spoiler GoT for you

**[Laney] 16:32**

That’s it, I’m removing the little heart next to your name

**[Laney] 16:32**

I don’t like you anymore

**[Laney] 16:32**

-1 Attachment-

**[Laney] 16:32**

Before

**[Bonehead] 16:32**

Aaaaaaaw, you have little smileys sext to my name

**[Bonehead] 16:32**

;) ;P

**[Laney] 16:32**

-1 Attachment-

**[Laney] 16:33**

After

**[Bonehead] 16:33**

Wow. Get rekt I guess   
:’(

**[Laney] 16:34**

Wasted

**[Laney] 16:37**

-1 Attachment-

**[Bonehead] 16:34**

Did you really just send me a poorly edited wasted meme with my face?

**[Laney] 16:35**

;*

Chuckling, you put down the phone and pressed the play button on the YouTube tab with your music on it, gently humming along. You enjoyed days like these, where no one was actually in the building so you could listen to your goddamn Disney songs and guilty pleasures on full volume without anyone judging you. Screw anyone that hates on Frozen, it’s a good movie and you’d fucking ballad the shit out of Let it go any second of the day.

Well, only if nobody could hear you, that is, but then you would sing your lungs out!

And music always made the work more fun, time was passing a lot faster. You were currently stacking some papers and sorting them into the files, as you heard the suspicious crash, immediately jumping at the sound and grabbing the nearest weapon next to you-a stapler.

 _“Wow, I’m sure whoever that is will be super intimidated by Mettas pink camouflage stapler that isn’t even as big as your hand!”_ Chara snorted and you glared at them, swapping your deadly weapon for your phone. You took two steps. Paused. Went back and took the stapler anyways.

“Just in case” you mumbled at the snickering Chara.

 _“Of cooourse!”_ they drawled, as you opened up the camera of your phone and switched over to the frontcamera to film a video.

“Okay, so we just heard a crash in here but we are supposed to be alone, so if anything happens to us here, this will be my last message to the world: Papyrus, I accidentally broke your favourite action figure and ducked taped it together so you wouldn’t notice. Frisk. Stay a kid. Honestly. Alphys, Undyne….. I watched the last episodes of the new season of Mew Mew without you and… she sacrifices herself to save her friends and dies in the end. Oh and she doesn’t end up with Shinji, he’s an item with Migi. Fuck you, that’s for ruining Jessica Jones for me, you asshats! Sans. I… I left a letter for you. It’s underneath the sofacushion. I.. It will explain everything to you. And lastly, Curly. I… Your food is shit. I’m sorry I never told you but you should only cook if you want to kill someone.”

_“That is your last message to your friends and you decide to spoiler two of your friends and insult another. Wow. Well done.”_

“My last message to you is Shut the fuck up for once. Oh yeah, Korra is a better avatar than Aang, fite me.”

_“Wow. That changes everything. I’m breaking up with you!”_

“Oh hun, I’ve tried to do that your ages now… Didn’t work out too well…” you muttered and crouched behind a potted plant in front of the break room Chara didn’t give a fuck and just stood in the middle of the hallway. “Will you hide now?”

 _“What are they gonna do? Throw a Fenton Thermos at me?”_ they retorted dryly and you glared at them again _. “Besides that, your “burglar” isn’t particularly scary. Look!”_

“No he’ll eat me!”

_“He won’t eat you, ya dingus! He isn’t even corporeal! Besides that, there isn’t much of you to eat”_

“What?” You scrambled up from behind the plant and poked your head into the pause room. Immediately a snort left your mouth before you could repress it and your arms fell on your side. “Wow”

 _“Hey, Blooky!”_ Chara greeted them and almost _flounced_ into the room. “ _What are you doing here?”_

“ooooooh, hey there, your highness.” He sounded incredibly sad and avoided Charas eyes.

“Oh, ya know, hanging with the human. If I knew that you were here, I would have hung with you though. We ghosts need to stick together, right?” Their laugh sounded relieved and honest and you rolled your eyes.

“Wow, rude much, Chara? I have a name too, I’m not just your Uber! Introduce me to your friend maybe?” You smiled gently at the ghost before squinting. “Wait, nevermind. I know who you are!” you grinned.

“ooooh, no, that must be a mistake! I-I am not that popular”

“You are Napstablook, Mettas cousin right?” Your smile grew as the corners of his…. Line… mouth… whatever… twitched. “He keeps talking about you and lets me listen to all of your songs! They are soooo cool! I listen to them all the time! You have a real talent, I’m glad Metta is pushing you!”

“ooooh, you are being too kind. I am not that good though. It’s silly anyways” Somehow, his voice got even sadder and you tried to pat him but didn’t really manage, so your hand hovered a few cm above him, encouragingly stroking the air.

“Noooooo, it’s really good! I love what you are doing and nothing you do with love and passion is silly and wrong! And having even one fan shows you that its totally worth it! If you want to, Chara an me can be your first fangirls”

_“Oh cool, I wanna be Blooky Trash Number one!”_

“Yes! Howsabout badges?”

_“Yeah, badges are cool! I want shirts and caps too!”_

“And a plush! Bitches love plushies!” you snickered.

“Are you two making fun of me?”

“What? No?” you pushed your lips into an upset pout.

_“Yo blooky, look at her. She’s the literal equivalent of a pink sparkly butterfly stuck to a marshmallow! She wouldn’t do that. And do I look like I’m joking?”_

“No, but you have a serious case of resting bitch face…” you muttered.

_“Oh yeah, except that the marshmallow is stuck in chocolate tequila, I have to add that!”_

You made a silly face toward Chara, which seemed to cheer up the ghost in front of you.

“Heh. I like you two. You are funny and nice!”

“ _Sure thing, Blooky! Say, we are hanging in Laneys office right now, if you are mobile, you can join us, that’s more fun! I’ bored anyways and she won’t stop singing supid-“_

“Yeah join us!” you interrupted and swatted at your ghostly companion.

“Hehe, alright. I don’t wanna compose though. So only if you don’t mind, I guess.”

“Sure, just grab your things and move over! I’ll wait there for you, just follow the awesome-Chara-music!” Chara coughed to hide a laugh and you glared again. “Well, see you in a bit!” You went back to the office and grabbed the sheets you were sorting again, softly humming for a few moments.

“You know, I just realised something”

“What did you realise?”

 _“What exactly caused that crash? I mean, I didn’t see any broken glass or stuff in the break room, we kinda just assumed it was Blooky, because he was there but… he’s not corporeal. Technically, he can’t even break anything._ ”

“Shut up, you are freaking me out here…” you mumbled and Chara let their legs dangle.

“ _Sorry, I was just wondering… It doesn’t make sense, that Blooky cause the noise…_.”

“That’s because he didn’t cause it. I did!” You jumped with a tiny scream at the voice and whipped around. “You are way too smart for your own good, ghost.”

“Rebecca, what are you doing here!” The woman in front of you had bleached hair and looked positively dishevelled, her hands buried in the pockets of her trenchcoat. She had bruises all over her neck and some on her face and you felt bad for her.

“Was looking for you. ‘ve been stalking you for a while now, just waited for you to be alone for once.” She didn’t sound too well either.

“What happened to you. Did Hugh do that?”

“Why did you leave?” She suddenly sounded so upset and accusingly. “We had a perfect life, you know. You and Hugh were a perfect match. He loves you, you know! He even moans your name when we have sex! And yet you run off to be some monster slut! And suddenly I have to be the scape goat! Why couldn’t you just stay? You had to be so ungrateful!” Goosebumps were crawling over your skin, covering your entire body.

“I can help you, you know… I know, it’s hard but-“

“I don’t need your help!” she screeched and you shut your mouth quickly. “I want my life back! But since you don’t want to do it, I have to end this once and for all! Maybe then I can be happy with Hugh again! He’ll love me! Once you are gone, he’ll see how much better I am and that he wasted his time with some runt like you! I am rich and pretty and not some fucking _weirdo_ demon!”

“Beccy, please, calm down…” you tried to reason, but she was already gone too far.

“DON’T BECCY ME! YOU ARE WHAT’S BETWEEN ME AND MY DREAMS!” she shouted and you swallowed hard.

“I don’t want to… I.. I don’t want anything from Hugh, really. You can have him if you want!”

“Don’t play pretend, I know exactly what you are doing here, playing the little victim. I don’t even know why he’s so obsessed with you. You aren’t overly talented in anything, you are dumb as bread and useless and broke and a goddamn runt. You aren’t even pretty for fucks sake! But I know your act, I know girls like you! Playing all innocent and like they are oh so poor and need to be saved bt in reality you are a cocksucking little slut!” she hissed and you took a step back. “Goodbye, you stupid cunt! I could never stand you actually.”

Suddenly the world slowed to a halt and everything went numb and muted. You didn’t feel the bullet hitting you after she pulled it from her pocket and pulled the trigger before you could even realise what was happening. Your eyes just got really big and your breath stopped for a second. “Oh…” the tiny whisp barely left your mouth before your hand went to your stomach were she must have hit. There was no possible way she could have missed from this range. As you looked at the slender, pale fingers, they were covered in red.

“You shot me, you bitch.” You managed to huff in disbelief, almost offended. This was not an appropriate reaction. Why couldn’t you feel anything. Not even Chara pulling on your arm or shouting your name. You simply collapsed on the floor, slowly staining the perfectly white carpet.

Mettaton would be angry, blood was so hard to remove. He would have to replace it, but this was so expensive. There were some splatters on the mahogany furniture around you as well. Damn, he would be so mad.

Now the pain started to set in, burning you from within. You tried to scream but nothing would come out, you couldn’t breathe. Your eyes fell on the phone on the table and you slowly pushed yourself up. You needed to call…. Help. Needed help. Just as you reached out for it, you remembered  that you weren’t alone.

_“Stay away from her, I dare you!”_

“Oh shuddup, monster scum!” Rebecca hissed and snatched the letter opener through Chara and ramming in between your ribs in your back until it hilted. This time, nothing could stop the bloodcurling scream that broke from your lips. The world faded to black and when it came back, you were alone in the room with Chara, frantically shouting your name.

 _“Elaine, thank god, you are still alive! Blooky is calling the police and ambulance, you will be fine! The crazy chick is gone, she must have thought you are done for good!”_ You heard what they said but you couldn’t understand. What was happening here? They were sobbing, you realised.

Phone. You needed your phone. Needed… to… Almost painfully slowly, you pushed yourself up, gagging at the coppery smell of blood. Oh good, the blood, there was so much blood.

“Hey, stay down!” You kept pushing and blindly feeling around, until your shaking fingers found the familiar shape of your phone. Your field of vision was so blurred and you just pressed random buttons until you heard a call sign. You sighed and closed your eyes for just a second.

“Heya? You done already? Can I finally pick you up? Paps is almost going crazy because he can’t wait for tonight, I’ve barely seen him this energetic, have fun dealing with that. …. Uuh, Laney? You there? Did you buttdial me? Sucks if this would be a booty call, haha, get it… You took in another rattling breath oh god, you were in so much pain, you wanted to vomit. Why was there so much blood? Why were you bleeding again?   
God, your voice was so weak, so shook up and broken, it was pathetic. You tried so hard to sound strong and composed but all that came out was a pathetic whimpered sob.

“Sans…. Help”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol


	37. My saving grace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah. If I don't make it until next chapter it's because someone has burned me at the stake.   
> But at least I can promise yo more from the afterlife

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

Undyne’s house was warm and cosy when Sans teleported you there. You could hear him shout something but your mind was too much of a haze to actually understand what was going on. Somehow, you were in the living room, Sans arms around your shoulders and back to keep you propped up. Was he always this strong? You could feel something trickle down the corner of your mouth and you wiped it away with shaking hands, staring at the brilliant red with mild interest. A bubbly laughter broke from your lips, a hint of insanity somewhere in there.

Internal bleeding, how great was that?

You could feel someone else steadying you from the other side and grinned at Undyne. You culdn’t hear what she said, everything just hurt and shrouded you in a cloud of fuzziness.

“HUMAN! WHAT-WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?!” Of course Papyrus voice could penetrate this weird bubble and pop it. Wasn’t it Silvestre? Oh no, you probably ruined the whole party.

“Oh my, you’ve made a surprise party. You guys shouldn’t have!” you mumbled and smiled. “I’m fine, just ran into some _backstabbing_ old pals, hehe.. But I am sure I am in _stab_ -le condition!” Your voice sounded so weak and tears were burning in your eyes, your smile shaking more than you right now as you took a rattling breath, coughing up some blood. “I know it’s not very _knife_ to ruin your _stabulous_ party and just _shoot_ in like this but I am a bit on _edge_ right now… But I might have been stabbed. And shot in the chest…”

“Sh-she’s in shock!” Alphys squeaked and you chuckled quietly. You felt so heavy and dull right now.

“Heh, I always knew you’d be a _sharp_ one, Alphy…” You tried to give her the fingerguns but by doing so, you slightly shifted the letter opener still in your back and bit your lip so hard, that you drew blood in order to turn your screams of agony into a tiny whimper. A shiver went down your spine, you were so cold. “I might wanna take a nap now.” You mumbled and let go of Sans and Undyne, slowly sliding to the ground until you were sitting in a somewhat slouched position. Burning hot hands framed your face and made you look up into eyes as red as yours. You smiled at Chara.

 _“You are not going to take a nap now! You are staying with me until we find a way to repair you!”_ From the corner of the eye you saw Sans arguing with Toriel and Alphys with hushed voices.

“Fix her!”

“I-I am not a human doctor! Sh-she needs medical attention! A-A hospital!”

_“Fix her!”_

“Sans, I don’t think my healing magic is capable of repairing damage this big. And there is still a bullet inside of her, I don’t think…”

“If you are not going to save her, I’ll find someone that will!” You blinked slowly and when your eyelids fluttered open again, he was gone.

“I am sleepy, Chara…”

_“Nononononononono, you are staying awake!”_

“Come on, please? You can figure out what to do while I sleep. I’m no help to you anyways…” Your eyelids shut slowly and your body sagged forward. You would have totally faceplanted right through Chara if Papyrus didn’t catch you.

“BE CAREFUL, HUMAN!” You smiled at him through a veil of tears and nestled into his arms.

“Thanks, Pap…” you coughed up more blood and winced at the sight of your blood staining the pearly white bones, bad memories starting to bubble up. You could smell the Ozone as Sans returned from whatever he was doing and…. Why did you hurt so much? You just wanted to sleep, why was it bad to sleep. Usually everybody is pissy because you didn’t sleep, then why now? You were so tired and there was so much pain. Why was there so much pain. And why were there people screaming at you? Didn’t they understand that you tried to take a nap?

A gentle slap across the face ripped you from your thoughts and you forced your eyes back open.

“Mera. No taking a napanap right now. Can you hear me?”

“Curly, what are you doing here? This _is_ a surprise party! Can I meet your fiancé?”

“She’s in shock, her pulsrate is dropping. Do you know how much blood she’s lost?” You giggled.

“But Curls, why would I lose blood?” Your childhood friend crooked her head and smiled at you.

“That’s right, everythings fine, darling. Can you keep your eyes up here for me?” You just nodded, a dull feeling in your head reminding you, that you really didn’t want to look down your body to inspect the suspicious damp sensation. She tired her hair together and opened a bag besides her, grabbing some weird bottles and all sorts of medical equipment. “Have you seen the latest episode of “Dress to impress”, Laney? I can’t believe what they did to those poor women!” Laughing was so painful, oh my god.

“Y-yes, I mean, who told that poor lady that pink and orange are a good match, especially for a weddingdress!”

 _“What are you doing?”_ Chara hissed next to them.

“Smart human!” Sans mumbled. “He’s making her talk, so she won’t slip way.” Curly just nodded and you started whimpering as she started to peel up your shirt.

“Maldecir…. The bullet ‘hit her about 2 fingerwide under her sternum. I really hope none of her organs got damaged in the process. Did you see the soft gold dress though? Wasn’t it beautiful?”

“Y-Yeah, she looked like someone dusted her with gold powder but the patterning was horrible. They should have used a circle skirt instead of just ruffling a strip of fabric, there was a bunch of awkward bunching and it just didn’t have the volume, it needed.”

“You’ve always been better with gowns that I have, you should really make my wedding dress for me! Would you hold her down for a second please?” You could feel hands on your shoulders but didn’t know why.

“Sure, but only if I get to embroider some Peals and Beaaaaaaaaaaaaah!” Whatever you wanted to say turned into a bloodcurling screech. Your insides felt like burning up and you trashed against the hold but they held you like a vice. Oh god, it felt like something inside you tried to claw its way outside of you with no abandon. “Pleeeeeeease, make it stop, please, please, it hurts…” you sobbed, tears streaming down your face.

“Hey, shhhht, it’s over, I’m done!” Curly took your hand and let something drop inside. “See? It’s out now, almost over, sweetpie! You are lucky that none of your organs git hit or your spine!”

“I-What’s that?” You couldn’t see straight anymore so you had to rely on your fingers brushing over the metal. “Is-Is that a bullet? Why was there a bullet inside of me? Did I get shot?” Your friend went stiff for a second.

“You-You don’t… remember?”

“No? I mean, yes but… It hurts so much.”

“I know, but I am almost done. I just have to do the back. The front is all patched up, don’t worry. Sans, I need you to hold her up.” The world went black again for a second and when you opened your eyes, your face was pressed against Sans shoulder, the fur of his hood tickling your nose. Instinctively, you grabbed whatever you could hold on to, one hand bunching up the fabric over his chest, the other one finding his. “-Good that you left it in, or else she would have died from exsanguination within minutes. I’m sorry, Laney, this will hurt.” She yanked out the letteropener between your ribs and you wanted to scream but nothing but a choked gag came out. As if the floodgates were opened, you remembered what was happening here.

You’ve been attacked. And now you were dying.

Everything felt so crystalclear and sharp, you were terribly aware of your own heartbeat slowing down ever so slightly and your muscles giving in.

“Oh no…” Curly whispered and you smiled sadly. “She hit the Aorta and… I-“ her voice was shaking and she choked back a sob.

 _“And what?”_ Your fingers were so stiff and you just couldn’t hold onto Sans anymore. You felt as if you were falling as time slowed down. The cool wood of Undynes floor pressed against your cheek before Sans could scramble to your side, eyesockets wide and disbelieving. Gently he turned you on your back.   
You were still smiling.

You could feel the yank of your soul coming from Chara and their angry voice.

_“She is not dying! Not as long as I can hold her soul together! Now stitch her back together!”_

“Chara… “ your voice was soft and quiet. “We knew this would happen sooner or later. I always die, it has to happen. It was just a question of time. I’m ready…”

_“What are you talking about, dummy?”_

“Heh… it’s alright. You can let go now…” Their face contorted into a grimace and they looked as if they weren’t sure if they wanted to nod or shake their head.  “Sans…?”

“I’m right here. You’ll be fine, okay? Just… just hold out a bit longer! Alphys and Toriel try to find a way to heal you! Everything’s gonna be alright!” You tried to laugh but it only turned into a coughing fit, spraying droplets of blood everywhere. You’ve heard of people dying peacefully and looking really content and pretty.

This wasn’t one of those ones.

“We both know that won’t do…. Just look at my soul…” You shot the deep black heart in Charas hands a glance, the deep crack in the middle seemed to vibrate and deepen, fine lines drawing from its centre. “Promise me you won’t be sad, when I am gone, yes? Don’t cry for me. I’ve always know, that I was meant to die. I think the other ones tried to tell me. I am ready.”

“Elaine please, don’t say that…” Your face contorted in pain and you made some involuntary gurgling sounds, as you placed your hand on his cheekbone, smearing it with your blood.

“Smile. Aren’t you happy? Aren’t you glad? You’re going to be free!”

“Please don’t do this…” he whispered but you smiled at him through your tears. You could feel the blood seeping all around you.

“I love you, Sans.”

 _“Sans, I can’t hold her soul together anymore…”_  You tried to blink away your tears, as something caught your attention. You’ve heard of people seeing their loved ones waiting for them as they dies but you never actually believed it. So when your mother smiled down at you from where Chara was standing before, now holding your soul. “ _It’s okay, buttercup. I’m with you, till the end. I won’t ever leave you_ ” Sobbing a laugh, you stretched out both your hands towards her, ignoring the sharp pain and the loud cracking of your soul.

“Mama” you whispered with the last breath your lungs would give, your hands falling to your side. The intense fire burning in your burgundy red eyes dimmed and eventually went out.

“Elaine? Elaine, please talk to me. Don’t do this, please!” Sans begged you but you didn’t budge.

And then, with one last, loud crack, you died.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_~~no~~ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- End of Part 1: Elaine -


	38. An Angel, A demon, A soul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> \- Part 2: Asra-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *soft chuckling*

Dying wasn’t a pretty process.

You always thought that it would be like falling asleep or being swallowed by the darkness to never wake up again. You’ve never been especially religious, so you didn’t really believe in heaven or hell, but somewhere in your heart you’ve hoped for more than just… nothing, more than the never-ending pain. It felt like fire burning you from the inside yet at the same time, you were so cold. You wanted to scream and curl up into a ball and hide from the suffering, but you had no control over your body-if you even still had a body.  
It felt different than what you remembered from Chara and Frisk, all those resets and save points. It never hurt like this but then again, they always came back. There was no turning back for you now.  
Dying was a lot lonelier than you expected as well. You didn’t see your loved ones, expecting or greeting you with open arms, not even Chara was here with you.

For the first time in ages, you were alone. Completely and utterly alone.

It was scary. You didn’t want to be alone, for the first time, you didn’t want to die and yet, you still greeted death like an old friend. It was true, you’ve known that you’d die for a long time but you weren’t ready, not really. You didn’t _want_ to die. It’s a miracle you’ve crossed the 23 mark anyways. Considering how much of a troublemaker you’ve been as a child and your immune system of a mouldy piece of toast. You’ve dodged the bullet more than once before so eventually, it just had to hit.

Then why did all of this feel so wrong? Why did one thought cross your mind over and over and over?

~~_You shouldn’t be here…_ ~~

Suddenly, the fire turned into something else, burning away the fear. And instead you were filled with… anger? Shouldn’t it be determination? It was definitely anger though.

You were angry.

Why should you die now? Still, you were scared of death and you greeted him but you weren’t _ready_ , this wasn’t _fair_. Rebecca wasn’t the one supposed to _kill_ you, so why should she? This was wrong; you weren’t supposed to die here! You just started to get your life back together and now everything is going to be ripped from you just like that? Was it all for nothing?

~~What are you doing?~~

Suddenly, you struggled against the darkness, clenching your teeth and pushing back.

“Who are you?” you shouted, panting heavily. You were running now, running to escape the darkness and pain. You were stronger than this, you would fight.

~~_Why are you fighting the inevitable? We’ve accepted it. Why fighting? You can’t escape this._ ~~

“Just watch me!” you hissed. “I don’t know who you are, but I am not ready. My fight isn’t over”

~~_You are supposed to end this._ ~~

Your hands found a wall in front of you, blocking your path.

“I am not your pawn” You turned to change directions.

_~~No you aren’t.~~ _

Another wall. You changed directions once again.

_~~You were never meant to be~~  _

More walls. They are closing in now, the fire in you is burning brighter now.

“Shuddup!” You clenched your fist and let it crash against the wall with full force. A small crack appeared. “Shuddup!”

_~~You are our Queen~~ _

“I said shuddup!” Your hand cracked into the wall once more, the fine lines spreading out much more through the invisible wall in front of you now. “I’m no queen!” You could feel tears burning in your eyes. “I am not a saviour or whatever. I am me. Elaine. Nothing else”

~~_Elaine died._ ~~

“But I am still here, I am still fighting.” More cracks were added, others deepening.

~~_You are_ ~~

“Then what do you want?” Tears were rolling down your cheeks as you kept screaming at the voices talking as one. “Who are you?”

~~_Elaine. You know us._ ~~

“Stop following me!”

~~_There is only you here_ ~~

“What are you… oh!” suddenly it clicked and you stopped, your fist against the cracks in the air.

“What do you ask for then?”

~~_For you to become who you need to be._ ~~

“Bullshit!” You closed your eyes and could feel the fire of rage burning inside you. You took a few deep breaths. “I already am who I had to be. And who I need to be. Even if I am not showing it.” Slowly, you opened your eyes and watched yourself in the broken reflection in front of you. You couldn’t see anything besides a pair of deep red eyes, burning with such an intense fire. “If you can do the things I can do but don’t, and then something happens, it’s your fault.” You clenched your fist again, harder this time. “I’m not giving up again. Not this time.”

~~_Then_ who _are you? You are different_~~

You didn’t answer; instead you chose to punch the heart of the splintering with a scream of rage, letting everything out that has built up inside of you for so long. With one last defeating crack, the wall shattered in front of you, white light almost blinding you. A cocky smile appeared on your face as you took hold of the intense red glowing soul, looking at the deep crack splitting it apart right in the middle before turning around and facing the light. You were done running into the darkness and faced who was behind you.

_Cerulean_

_Orange_

_Indigo_

_Purple_

_Green_

_Yellow_

“I am Asra”

 

Shyly, your eyelids fluttered open and you stared at the ceiling, taking in a deep breath. The pain was gone as was the fire inside of you. Slowly, you sat up straight, the muscles in your back tense. What happened?

You died. You knew as much as that, the rest was nothing but a blur, furthermost the intense fear and suffering but everything else… Was this real?

Carefully you opened and closed your hands, seeing if they were still working a-okay. Weird. They acted without any trouble; the pale skin was clean and soft, only the white scars standing out ever so slightly. There was still a bit of dried blood under your fingernails. You died. Rebecca came into the office and shot you in the chest and stabbed you in the back. Was it all just a dream? There was no way you could have survived that. Was it another dream? Another version of you dying again. It never felt so real before. There was a difference between seeing something happen through someone’s eyes and actually experiencing it for yourself. It _felt_ real. You actually _felt_ the pain and death and what happened beyond. Well, what happened beyond? You couldn’t remember for some reason. You really had to do something against these dreams, they were slowly getting out of hand. It certainly wasn’t normal to feel this intense, as if you could still feel the wound on your-

With shaking fingers you reached up, ghosting under your shirt and trying to find the even skin. Tears started to dwell in your eyes and you yanked the fabric of a T shirt, that wasn’t yours up, just to be greeted with an ugly, huge, pink scar on your sternum, almost like an exploding star or a supernova. It seemed fresh but also nearly healed. With a broken sob, you twisted around, feeling for its equivalent on your back.

_No. No. nonnonononononono, this wasn’t happening, this wasn’t real. How could this be real?_

You did the only reasonable thing someone could do in a situation like this, after everything that has happened and what was going on in your mind.

You screamed bloody murder.

 

 

Sans watched Carmen prop up a weird bag next to the couch as well as popping in a movie, he didn’t know and frowned. She insisted on accompanying him and the demon to stay with Elaine, bringing up the argument, that they still might need a doctor and that she knew her best friend pretty well after all. No one knew what would happen now, not after New Year’s Eve. It was possible that Elaine wouldn’t ever wake up again, being in a constant state of being fallen down; if or when you’d ever wake up was written in the stars. There was another scenario, only he and Chara had thought about. They exchanged one glance and knew that the other had the same thing on their mind.

Absolute corruption.

In that case, he would have to do, what was necessary, to spare you a fate worse than death. He hoped with all he had, that it wouldn’t come to that.  
Chara was sitting on a chair at the table and watching Carmen with mild interest, their chin propped up on one hand. The doctor seemed determined in her doing, having insisted upon picking up a few things from her home before staying, saying it’s _essential_ but this just looked like she wanted to have a nice, fun evening and avoiding to get bored. To his surprise, she didn’t start the movie and didn’t touch the bad. Instead, she grabbed the chair next to Sans and on the opposite of Chara and sat down, so they were forming a weird triangle. She had dark circles under her eyes and sniffled. Her tan skin was pale and she could probably do with some sleep. For a second, Sans felt bad that he ruined her new year but this woman seemed so determined on saving her friend, it was incredible.

“It was the first time, I’ve seen a human soul…” she whispered after a while. “Not even mine. My fiancé said it’s too dangerous. I’ve always wondered what colour mine would be.”

 _“It’s orange, bravery. But I can see a few specs of cerulean and green in there, so patience and kindness”_ Chara whispered quickly, averting their eyes.

“You can see my soul?” they just shrugged.

 _“Ree taught me. I got better after I died.”_ That was all they had to say about the matter, as it seemed, unwilling to even look up, their arms now crossed.

“Why does it have multiple colours? Does that mean there is something wrong with it?”

“No, it’s completely normal.” Sans explained, smiling at her. “A child’s soul is usually very pure, coloured after their main personal trait. Cerulean for patience, orange for bravery, indigo for integrity, purple for perseverance, green for kindness and yellow for justice. As humans grow into adults, their soul grows with them. Usually, it means that they take up multiple traits. You have a strong sense of bravery but also a lot of patience and kindness, so that’s what your soul reflects. After all, it is just a culmination of your essence, you could say.”

“Well, I am a paediatrician after all, so I need all of those…. You seem to be very good with this kind of topic, Sans?”

_“He’s the best. I’ve never seen someone as good with souls as Sans.”_

“That might have been the nicest you’ve ever said to me just there!”

_“Shuddup.”_

“Please, tell me more! What about evil people? I’ve heard that there are humans with souls that have only one colour. Don’t they have other traits?”

“A so called “pure” or “perfect” soul is very rare with humans nowadays, especially adults. They weren’t very common before the war and they’ve grown even rarer now. They are created when someone has one trait that they are basically the pure essence of this feeling, say, there was someone so incredibly just and straightforward-“

“like Captain America?”

“Uuuh, sure? Take him for a second. His soul would be a pure yellow soul since he basically embodies justice. Of course they have other traits too, but those pure souls are very strong, probably the strongest ones out there. As to your other question, this is something that happens more and more, rotten souls. You’ve seen one before, Chara?”

 _“Yeah… once or twice. It’s when a humans soul gets so overcome by their evil deeds, that the purity of their soul slowly rots away, turning grey or brown until there is nothing good in them left. I’ pretty sure my soul was like this before I met Elaine. I… wasn’t exactly good.”_ They flashed a thin-lipped smile and gripped their forearms.

“Well, but you’ve changed now? Can your soul change too?” Carmen crooked her head to the side and smiled encouragingly.

 _“Yeah, I am more… like me again I think. Hatred has corrupted me and I am pretty sure not having a soul for myself had something to do with it as well._ ”

“Well, you seem to be good for Laney, so you can’t be half bad.” Suddenly she snapped her fingers. “But say, what about Elaine. I saw her soul. It was black! I doubt that she has one of those rotten souls, you said they turn brown or grey!”

_“Yeah, but she is… different.”_

“Elaine doesn’t really fall in the category. I don’t know why her soul is black, I can only guess.”

 _“Oh, I know!_ ” Chara offered a sad smile. _“Her soul isn’t actually black, I think you’ve noticed the crack in the middle of it?_ ”

“Of course, I was wondering, was that because she was dying?”

“ _Nono, she’s had that for a while now. Long story short, we met in a very dark place and escaping it has damaged her soul beyond repair. The black is actually me holding it together, or else she would die on the spot. It only works though because she has one half on my own soul, I couldn’t do it with just any human_.”

“Wait, what?” Carmen grimaced. “She has _part of your soul_? Gross.”

“Yeah well, I only found out recently too but as it turns out that Elaine might have more of a monster than others.” Sans shrugged a bit, not really breaking his pokerface of a never-ending grin.

“That is so cool.” Carmen whispered. “So that’s why it worked when-“ Slowly, Chara got up from their chair, turning their head.

_“She’s awake.”_

“What? Impossible. How would you know?” Carmen smiled kindly, as if she was belittling a child, but Sans had also felt it, shaking his very core. God, this was such an intense, new feeling for him and he wasn’t really sure if he liked it.

“No, they are right, I can feel it too.”

“Is that a monster thing?”

 _“No.”_ both of them answered and the human doctor seemed confused. Then they heard the scream.

Chara was in the room first, just a split second before Sans could shortcut there. You was sitting up, sobbing frantically and carefully rocking your body back and forth, arms wrapped around your torso. You were mumbling to yourself, eyes unfocused and tears that just wouldn’t stop coming.

_“Buttercup, it’s alright, you’re-“_

“Don’t touch me!” you hissed, flinching back. Chara withdrew their arm as if they just got burned. “I died. I remember dying. Why aren’t I dead? What happened? I should be dead!” Your eyes locked with Sans’ and something crossed your expression, he couldn’t really define. It almost looked accusing yet guilty. “Why didn’t you just let me die!”

“Would you’ve let one of us die?” he replied without thinking and she flinched, as if he just hit her, but she shook her head.

“What have you done? I am dead? I died. I-I remember being dead. This is all just a nightmare, isn’t it? I am dead, this can’t be real!”

_“Elaine, please calm down, I’ll-we-will explain everything. But you need to rest and-“_

“Don’t you dare telling me what to do Chara Dreemurr, I just died, I have every reason to panic and freak out! You don’t-“

_“What? Know how it feels? If you might have forgotten, I am dead. I do know very well!”_

“You don’t know what I have seen! What I have been!” A heartbreaking sob escaped your throat and you kept rocking yourself.

_“I’m sorry, I should not have shouted at you…”_

“But you did!” Unknowingly, you started to scratch at your arms again-hard-only stopping when Sans grabbed your hands to hold them still.

“You don’t need to hurt yourself more. I know it’s hard but you need to calm down. You are safe and everything is okay now. We fixed you.”

“Okay? Okay?” you screeched, throwing your head back and laughing-though you might have sounded like a retarded goose. “Being dead does not account as okay Sans. I was ready, I was supposed to die. I was there and-“ You stopped in the middle of your sentence, remembering something. Were you really ready? You had your chance to move on and yet… Why didn’t you? What kept you? What happened?

Tears were pooling at your eyes and you sobbed again, burying your face at his chest, desperately holding on.

“I should be dead. I don’t deserve life, I didn’t deserve it then I don’t deserve it now. Why am I still here? It hurt so much…” Carefully, he wrapped his arms around you, caressing the back of your head. The familiar touch felt so comforting, being near him eased your pain just a little bit. It only made you more desperate, not really understanding what was happening.

“Wow, you guys really suck at this.” Your childhood friend shook her head, casually leaning against the doorframe and flicking a ringlet out of her face. “You’re doing it wrong. That way she’ll just keep overthinking and dragging herself down and ending up hurting herself more.”

“ _Oh, then what do you recommend doing_?” Chara retorted snarky. You were shaking so hard now, panting as your mind was racing.

“I’ll do what I came here to do” As if she didn’t allow any doubt, she walked over and grabbed both of your hands, pulling you up.

“Curly?”

“It’s just me, Ellie-bean, don’t worry!” She lead you out of bed with a casual care, neither of them have ever seen before but you seemed to know it as you just followed her out of the room, still a bit wobbly on your feet. The skeleton and ghost exchanged a confused look and followed through, only catching up with you, as they sat down on the couch.

_“Hey, she could have fallen.”_

“Yeah, but she didn’t. You don’t have enough faith in her.” Her voice was joyful and the human doctor grabbed the bag, she’d prepared, her tone now shifting to a soft one. “Here, I’ve brought you some embroidery and beading you can do.” Your whole face lit up at the prospect and you immediately dived in. Curly just snickered and pressed a button on the remote, starting the movie.

“What are you doing?” Sans asked, sitting down next to you and putting an arm around you on the back of the couch.

“I distract her. After-After she lost ‘er two relationships with two of our closest friends she was terribly depressed and at an all-time low. I did this to stop her from overthinking. She completely focuses on the work with her hands-also, avoiding the self-harm that way-and it acts calming to her. The movie is there for background noise to drown her thoughts. And because she adores Disney and it makes her hum along.”

 _“Repressing it doesn’t seem very healthy. You should know that, as a doctor._ ” Carmen gave Chara side eyed look of disapproval, clicking her tongue.

“I don’t help her _repress_ it, silly, I help her _process_ it. She focuses and can actually just think without everything piling up and the outside world pushing in on her, making everything worse.” She pressed a soft kiss at your hair, which you didn’t notice as you were currently busy with some beads, stitching the elaborate design. Time seemed to pass endlessly as you focused on the work, rearranging the beads as well as the broken fragments of your mind. Everything seemed like a big haze.

“You should have let me die…” you mumbled suddenly and you could hear Sans chuckle next to you, kissing your scalp.

“I know you. You are wrong though.” The corners of your mouth twitched and somehow… you felt a spark inside you ignite a fire.

“Prove it to me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But... how exactly did she survive?


	39. Mummy's little princess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've had 2 really shitty, extremely aggravating days and I'm in a "Throwing-a-table-against-a-wall-because-FUCK-EVERYTHING!!!" mood rn and I cant even get drunk because I ran out so I am uploading an angry chapter-because I can. And character development is important
> 
> And we'll get some pre-accident/Hugh Elaine :D She used to be so different back then~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe I should add, that where I live, you are allowed to drink when you turn 16. Which is awesome af! (So me and every other teen ever have been getting drunk since we're 14. That's why everyone here is so chill and badass) 
> 
> No underage drinking in this chapter. Elaine lives in a chill af country, that's all!

You inspected your body in the bathroom mirror of the house, twisting and turning to almost impossible angles to catch a glimpse of yourself. There was a huge bruise on your upper arm, one on your clavicle and one on your thigh from where you fell. Other than that, you seemed fine.

Well, if you’ll exclude the huge scars on your sternum and back where the gaping holes used to be. Not that that was something worth to be noting or anything. Scars didn’t bother you anymore, you’ve had enough already. There were the ones you did to yourself, the ones he did, Hugh did, the one huge one on your leg, a fine line almost like a crack from your ankle, reaching up the entire length of it until it faded somewhere on your upper thigh, where the beam of Sans Gaster Blaster hit you. What’s two more? Nothing much.

When you looked into the mirror, there was another one, a pale white line cut straight across your cheekbone under your eye. Surprised, you tilted your head a bit. It’s didn’t look explicitly bad, on the contrary. It made you look quite daring and like you’ve lived an interesting life full of adventures. Instead, there was a lot of dying involved now.   
When you looked at it again, it was gone. Curious.

As you raised your arm to touch the moving cut, your eyes fell upon another, once a huge gash on the outside of your forearm down to the elbow of your left hand. This one was probably the only one you cared about, as it still made your guts burn with sheer guilt and oddly, anger. One could have thought that you’ve moved on beyond that, but oh well. As it seems, you could still be just as petty and vindictive as ever.

Calmly, you began to hum an old tune, one you haven’t minced in almost seven years. As you hummed, your body started to relax naturally, losing its tension. You looked at yourself again, not just your bruises, and my word, you really looked bad. Your red eyes seemed somewhat dull and a tad clouded; the intense fire inside them seemed to have burned down for now. You were so tired; could anyone blame you for the huge circles under your eyes? Any darker and you could be the alpha in a pack of racoons. You were still pale as a ghost-hah, good one, Elaine-and that made your freckles stand out more than usual. The only thing that remained adorable-not to sound narcissistic-were your lips, the full and luscious rosy pout of yours. And your cute little button nose you’ve inherited from your mom, wrinkling from the fake smile on your face you refused to give up until now. Something else, you were totally in love with, was your hair. It had grown out quite a bit by now, already covering your shoulders a finger wide and standing up wildly in any direction, still damp from the shower you just took. The reddish brown has faded by now, turning into a beautiful coppery ginger colour that was pretty much your natural hair colour as you couldn’t detect any regrowth. A snort escaped you and you shook your head.

_I’m a fucking Weasley…_

The thought amused you as you kept humming, quietly singing along the tune.

“I haven’t heard you singing that song in ages, pequeña. Why the sudden change?” Curly stood in the bathroomdoor and you just smiled at her, showing off the scar on your arm.

“Hey, you remember where I got this?”

“Of course…. It was a rough few days for all of us. Is that why you started to sing the old song?”

“Yeah, I just remembered. And then the melody popped up and well, I haven’t sung it ever since. And well…” Still smiling, you looked into the mirrored cabinet. “Things are changing so fast around here right now, maybe I just wanted to keep something.” You childhood friend carefully patted your cheek.

“No, it was good what you’ve said. It changed things but only for the better.”

“Yeah, you might be right” You looked at the mirror again and this time, 16 year old Elaine stared back at you. _Your eyes were hard as steel and the cocky grin feisty._

_You stared at yourself in the glass window on the main door of the house, fluffing up the wild, ginger curls and detangling it where it got stuck to the zipper of your leather jacket. The keys jiggled in your hands, as you turned them. Energetically, you pushed open the heavy door, quietly singing to yourself and swaying your hips. Kicking off your boots was easier to take them off properly, especially with those extra tight jeans of yours._

_“Where have you been?” You stumbled, holding back a curse, as you turned your head._

_“Mornin’ Mom!” You flashed a confident, toothy grin at her, throwing your long hair over your back._

_“I asked you a question!”_

_“Calm down, Emmy, she’s home now…” your father tried to reason with her but your mom already seemed furious with you. You tried to turn around completely but stumbled over your bag and had to lean against the wall in order to stay up._

_“Are you drunk?”_

_“Nooooo, just a bit tipsy maybe!” you admitted giggling._

_“You had work to do, Elaine! You can’t just skip off and party! You have responsibilities!”_

_“Yeah, but I don’t caaaare, Mom!” you slurred, crossing your arms in front of you. “I hate doing this, I just wanna be normal for once and go out and have fun and party! I am not here to do all your dirty work! I am tired of babysitting all the time or working. I’m a teenager not your clone!”_

_“I am just trying to get you on an even path for your future!” Your mother huffed and her nostrils flared up._

_“Yeah well, maybe I don’t want this! I have my own plans, you know?” She huffed and you started glaring when she gave you a dismissive wave of the hand._

_“Oh, come on, Elaine! You can’t still possibly chase after that stupid dream of yours! Your talents would be wasted as a tailor. And let’s be honest, being a singer is not paying well except you are some huge popstar and the chances of that happening are basically nonexistent!”_

_“Well, dad supports me, so why not!” You pointed at him and he raised his hand in his defence._

_“Leave me out of this, I don’t wanna die!”_

_“Ugh, fine!” you hissed, trying to march out of the room._

_“No, you are staying right here, young lady!”_

_“No! I am tired and drunk and I wanna go to bed! I don’t have the nerve to be fighting now anyways!”_

_“Why can’t you be a bit more like your sister? She always does what I tell her and…” You twirled around with sparks in your eyes._

_“Why can’t_ you _be more like_ your _sister! At least she doesn’t want to live vicariously through me!”_

_“I am not…”_

_“I am not your puppet, Mom! Do you even listen to me?” You stomped past her, growling._

_“I swear to god, ever since you started to date that girl, you’ve been out of control!”_

_“Just so you know, Sybil broke up with me about two months ago!” you shouted, tears prickling in the corner of your eyes. “I know you are too busy with work but you should have at least noticed that I was crying for days! And that I had to basically bleach clean our kitchen, since that bitch microwaved Nugget!”_

_“Elaine, I didn’t know…”_

_“Of course you didn’t! Because you never listen! I am so done with being…” You pulled at your own hair out  of sheer anger. “You never shout at Lizzy, no matter how many test she fails or that she literally goes out to party every other day and probably has something going on with every boy in school, but as soon as I go out and party and go get myself some boycandy, I am a failure to you!” You grabbed the large mirror on the commode next to you and just smashed it on the ground, cutting up your arm in the process. “I wish I wasn’t your daughter!” The second you said that, you clamped your hands over your mouth in shock. “Mom, I didn’t mean to…” Your mother just stepped closer with a cold and stern expression on her face. You shivered at the sight, she was so much taller than you. But then again, so was everyone. Carefully, she took your arm and inspected the cut on in._

_“Do you need me to ruin her?” She just asked coldly and you shook your head shyly._

_“As much of a dickbag she was, I still have feelings for her.”_

_“Is that the reason you grew distant lately?”_

_“Yeah, she… she’s spreading rumours again. And. I had something going on with Chase after it, he wanted to get on with me for ages and I thought why not. I needed the dickstraction.”_ HAH! Got it? DICK-straction! What a fucking comedic blessing I am to the world _; you though. “ I didn’t knew that he had a girlfriend at the time. We broke up yesterday. ‘s why I went out ‘rinking with Curls and the gurls.” Your mother huffed._

_“Are you sure that you don’t want me to-“_

_“Curly broke his nose. And I think his.. privates. At least he won’t reproduce anymore, not after the kick he got. ” A small chuckle came from her as she took you by the hand and led you to the bathroom as your dad started to pick up the shards of glass on the floor. The smell of the disinfect made your sensitive nose burn and you made displeased noise._

_“I am sorry I wasn’t here for you. I should have noticed. I just want you to be happy and have a steady life and everything. You know that I love you? And that’s why I’m pushing you?”_

_“Yeah..” you mumbled, averting your eyes. “I’m just frustrated and brokenhearted and drunk and I should not have lashed out like that. ‘m sorry!” She nuzzled your cheek, her hair tickling your nose. She smelled like lavender._

_“I know, don’t worry. I should not have said those things either and you said some true things.” She framed your face with her hands. “You’ve grown so much, buttercup and I am sorry that I put all of this responsibility on you. You act so adult that I sometimes forget that you are only sixteen.” You smiled, eyes droopy._

_“’s okay Mama…” you mumbled and she ruffled your hair._

_“So, all badged up. And now off to bed!” She gave you a kind, warm smile. “You are still grounded though. It’s 5:45am and you came home drunk and obviously.. sore.” You blushed at the phrasing. Did you really look like you hooked up with a random guy? Because, yeah, you did, but only out of frustration. And because you deserved it. You’ve had an in-depth conversation about it with Melanie and fur random girls at the club toilet. “No TV for a week!”_

_“But Moooooooom!” you whined, even though a slight grin was tugging at your lips. “The season finale of Supernatural is coming!”_

_“I don’t care!”_

You averted your eyes from the mirror and pressed them shut so tightly, that stars exploded in the darkness. When you looked back, it was just you again and you wrestled down the memory. You barely ever fought with your mother, had a good relationship with her in general-if she wasn’t working like a maniac, something she passed on to you-but if you’d be fighting, you’d go at it hammer and tongs. You resented those times, why did you have to remember that right now?

The song you were singing right now was somewhat of your brake up anthem back then. Now it was just a song you used to love.

“Do you ask yourself what happened to Sybil and Chase after everything went down the drain?” You asked with the corners of your mouth twitching and grabbing a towel to finish drying off your hair. Carmen threw back her massive mane and chuckled.

“No, ‘ecause I know?”

“Oh you do?” you looked at her with huge eyes and grinned. “How are they. We used to be best friend once.”

“Yes, but you’ve always been closer. I never liked Sybil. She was a cunt. But you’ve had a crush on her for ages so I didn’t want to be a beaverdam. And Chase was… well, a wanker. I think he only hung out with us because he and Sybil lived next door and because he really wanted to get into your pants!”

“Dafak is a beaverdam, Curly?” you chuckled.

“You know, I can’t really say cockblock in that case so I had to be creative. But then again, so did you” Laughing, you threw a wash cloth at her.

“Oh my god, ya nasty!”

“Don’t act surprised, mera.” She laughed. “Anyways! You remember the chick Chase used to date behind your back?”

“Christie? Yeah, why? Did you break her nose too?”

“Nono. Better. Chase actually to get her sister prego. They are married now, I am their kids doc. Christie and Jackie-her sister-haven’t spoken ever since the child was born!” You sputtered as you tried to contain your laughter.

“Bloody fucking brilliant! What about Sybil?”

“Oh, she’s a striper down at Brooklyn’s now! I saw her when I had Marinas bachelorette party there about a year ago. She doesn’t look good. Still has the horseface though. I rather prefer your current boycandy, he’s much more suited for you!”

“Oh my good, he isn’t “boycandy”, Curly! But the story-fucking glorious, do you think I sould pay her a visit? You know-to bring back olden times?”

“Come on, you just wanna knock ‘er out with a striper pole! We still have to talk about your current boy-situation though. Like… soon.”

“I’ve always been into baseball, you should know that!” You laughed but quickly got sombre again as you noticed her eyes shifting to the huge scar on your sternum. Carefully, she toutched with her fingertips and you shuddered. “Fuck, your fingers are cold. Is that some sort of doctors condition that all of your hands must be cold?” She chuckled quietly.

“Yeah, otherwise I’ll get my license revoked.” Her eyebrows furrowed as she gently brushed across the red flesh. “It’s healed so much already. It’s only been a day. I’ve never seen something like this before. You should be dead, you know? I really tried to save you but you’ve lost too much blood and she hit the aorta and spine in the back.” You just shrugged, grabbing the blowdryer from the stand, switching it on. You had to shout over it.

“Yeah, I should have died but I’ve always managed somehow. Death’s probably afraid of me. Or has a major crush. No one has told me how I actually survived but I guess it’s something something magic”

“Aren’t you the least bit curious?”

“Nope. Absolutely not. The less I know the better.” Your nose crinkled a bit as you smiled. “At least that’s what I am pretending to do. Irl, it’s eating me up on the inside but I am too scared to check my soul!”

“Why?” Suddenly you turned off the hairdryer and you could watch yourself in the mirror as you casually dropped your façade, the smile disappearing and your natural expression overtaking it. You brows were furrowed a tiny bit and your nose wrinkled a bit as if you were annoyed. No joyful smile was on your lips right now. You just looked so done with the world. Curly snorted. “Okay, I was starting to get worried because you smiled so much but I am glad that the don’t-fuck-with-me Elaine is still in there. And she’s brought her resting bitch face!”

“Pretending to be happy is easier. Less dumb questions.”

“Isn’t it getting so exhausting to keep up the act all the time?” You laughed and striked a dramatic pose, wriggling your eyebrows at her.

“You seem to forget, I am a performer, I act. And I am bloody brilliant at it, yarharharhar!” You sighed at her joyful laugh and scratched your head. “Also, I’ve had five years of practise pretending. And it’s all about knowing how to pretend.”

“Wow.”

“What?”

“You sounded just like Circus Baby from Sister Location right there. You know, the pretend thing.”

“Oh my god, you fucking plebs, that was Ennard, get your shit together!”

“Oh excuse meeee, Princess, I am sorry, I forgot that you are literally Fnaf Trash number one!”

“Yeah, you better remember!” You gave her the tiniest smile ever and rubbed your eyes, yawning loudly. “Jesus Christ on a tricycle, I’ve been dead asleep for almost 10 hours, why am I still so tired?”

“Don’t joke about that, Ellie-Bean! You literally died, of course you’re gonna be tired, your body needs the energy to regenerate.”

“What’s the use of magic, if it doesn’t insta-heal you back up to full health? I never get more than four hours of sleep every night, so why now? I refuse to waste precious time with sleeping. I want a refund!”

“I don’t know if you can refund “Death by exsanguination”, dear.”

“Why do you have to throw around with medical terms like that?”

“Death by going through a pretty rough period of time” You squinted at her.

“Did you just…?”

“Si.”

“Ya nasty!” you swatted at her, laughing.

“Uuuh, am I interrupting something?” You turned your head to look at Sans, hand raised to knock and a somewhat confused look on his face. But okay, you were in kind of an awkward position right now; still naked from your shower except for your hair, which was wrapped in the small towel and with Curlys hand still pressed between your boobs.

“Nope, just checking up on Laney.”

“You mean checking out?” You rolled your eyes and grabbed the bathrobe from behind the door, quickly slipping in and tying the belt in front of you.

“Come on, stop teasing the poor guy, Curly!” Still, the corners of your mouth were twitching. “Don’t worry Sans, she’s just being a giant twat.”

“Besides that, we’ve known each other for over twenty years now.” Curly giggled mischievous. “There isn’t much to see I’m not used to or that’s new. Things happen when you grow up this close” She gave you a coy wink and you could feel the blush spreading all over your face.

“Get the fuck out now.” She giggled again and almost flounced out of the door, her laughter like the chirping of a bird.

“Have fun with your…” she furrowed her brow and looked between you and Sans. “We need girl talk.”

“Fuck off, you asshat!” you laughed and tried to hide your face in the palm of your hand. “Can you believe the nerve of this gal? I’m sorry, she can be so blunt” He chuckled deeply and rubbed the back of his head awkwardly.

“Nah, s fine, pal..” You crooked one eyebrow at the term, and your lips curled. “Say- uh… You and me… What exactly...?” Chuckling, you pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“You’re my…. Vertebae.” You smirked triumphant at the terrible joke, proud that you’ve kept it in for so long. “Do whatever you want with that information now.”

“Heh, that’s… That’s genius!” he laughed, a bit awkward maybe. The light blue tinge on his cheeks filled you with a never known satisfaction that made you bite your lip in a smirk as he tried to contain his amusement over your dumb joke. You pushed away from the sink you were leaning on and stretched. “Well, I’m gonna get dressed now and try to fight the tiredness, if you n’t mind” Just as you walked passed him, he grabbed your wrist, locking eyes with you.

“Actually I do. We need to talk.” Uh-oh. “About what happened.” UH-OH! “Which one are you?”

You’d rather not. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooooooooooh, what does Sans want to?   
> What might he possibly mean by that?   
> What is Chara thinking rn?  
> Will Undyne break down the door to see her bestie?
> 
>  
> 
> And just what was going on with Elaine and Curly in the past?
> 
> TURN IN TO FIND THESE ANSWERS AND MANY MORE NEXT CHAPTER AT "WHAT THE FUCK AM I EVEN DOING HERE?"


	40. A woman with a past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NEXT UP ON WHAT THE FUCK AM I EVEN DOING: 
> 
> ELAINE USED TO BE A VERY DIFFERENT PERSON THAN THE ONE WE KNOW RIGHT NOW!   
> A very dangerous person.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lying becomes just a bit to easy for Elaine. And quite frankly, that should worry you guys.

A shiver went down as the words reached your ears. It took you a while to comprehend it and you took a deep breath, smiling to yourself. Things were different now and you refused to think about them but at one point in time, you had to, as unpleasant as it might be.   
So…. Who exactly were you now?

“I am me, Sans. I am who I was forced to become, to make things work and survive up until now.” The skin around your eyes wrinkled a tiny bit, as you smiled at him with bright eyes. “I am who I have to be but wasn’t because I couldn’t yet still became. Nothing has changed, I am still me.”

 _“Could you please stop talking in riddles and give us a clear answer?”_ Chara huffed behind you and you giggled, turning towards them as they leaned on the wall next to the door, arms crossed. _“Seriously, who are you? Edward Nygma?”_

“Oh come on, let me be really mysterious and suave for once!” They just rolled their eyes and gave a short nod towards Sans.

_“She’s herself, no one else can be this much of a dork”_

“Aaaaaaw, you are no fun, Chara!”

 _“Be serious, please….”_ They pushed away from the wall, something like empathy on their face. Or was it something else _? “You just died and…”_ No, not empathy. _Pity_.  They pitied you. Frowning, you twirled around to Sans, but he avoided your gaze. Your eyebrows shot up at the sight.

“Elaine, we… kinda need to tell you something…” The tone of Sans voice made all of your alarm bells ring at the same time, a shiver running down your spine.

“What is going on?”

“It’s… about what happened.”

 _“Elaine you…”_ You scrunched up your face and made a disruptive humming sound.

“I don’t care, really?” You stated and shrugged dismissively. “I am alive and that’s all that matters to me. And I am pretty sure that this conversation would just end up with you talking to me like I am four year old whose dog just “ran away” so I’d rather not.”

 _“But… Since when? I don’t really understand. You’ve gotten so mad  before because we didn’t tell you things and now you… don’t want to?”_ You just shrugged and squeezed past the two of them, opening up the wardrobe and grabbing a new set of clothes. Your damp bathrobe made a soft “thud” sound when it hit the floor.

“You are mistaken. I got mad because you treat me like I am _weak_. And I’d rather not talk at all than being talked down. I am curious as balls but I am done playing dumb, Chara. I just _died_ , I think I’ve earned my big girl stripes.” You closed the door just as you slipped on the oversized shirt, ruffling your hair in the process. Sans just sighed.

“You are right, but… it would be unfair to keep something this big from you. Especially since it could be so dangerous.” Disregarding, you rolled your eyes and made a “go on” gesture with your hand. Sans seemed relieved and stepped closer. “Thank you for listening…”

 _“For once…”_ Chara mumbled but he shot them a silencing glance.

“Okay, can we get this behind us please? What’s so dangerous about me dying? Or well, not dying?”

 _“It’s not that you survived but rather how you survived, Laney.”_  Chara plopped down onto the bed, slightly bouncing and you climbed onto the mattress as well, our legs crossed and a slight smile on your face to fake interest, while your head and guts were burning with guilt. Did they know what happened? What you’ve done?

“okay, so how did I survive? I don’t remember anything that happened.” The lie came way to easy for your own comfort.

 _“Well, you died, I… I’ve lost my grip on your soul and without me holding it together it… broke.”_ Chara averted their eyes and you took in a shaky breath. Golly, they must feel so guilty.

“Then why am I still here?”

“It refused.”

 _“Quite literally!”_ You snorted at the dorky pun and ran your fingers through your damp hair.

“Okay, you’ve lost me.”

_“Well, you remember when Frisk was fighting Ree and every time their soul shattered, it basically refused due to their determination?”_

“Yes?”

_“Exactly….”_

“That doesn’t make sense. I wasn’t very determined… Determination isn’t a strength of mine” Sans and Chara exchanged a short glance in confusion.

“Well, apparently you were. At least just for long enough. It wasn’t holding out long, it already started to crack up again and I just couldn’t let you die right there. I had to do… _something_.” The skeleton was wrangling his hands and you narrowed your eyes.

“What did you do, Sans?”

_“Don’t be mad! I-I asked him to do it! It’s both of our fault, so yeah… just… don’t hate us.”_

“Oh god, what child did you sacrifice to Satan?”

“No sacrifices but I…” He seemed to be looking for the right words but couldn’t find them. “It might be easier to just show you!”

“Wait, Wha-“ he made a gesture with a twist of his wrist and suddenly, you felt like falling or like you’ve got whiplash. Your stomach was rising and you forced it back down, as you stared at your soul, probably the worst one out there. It was a beautiful black, almost like a crystal. Cracks were spreading all over it, mended together by something blue, almost like glue or filler. If you looked closely, you could almost see a hue of red underneath everything but that could have just been your imagination.   
Fascinated, you took it into your hands, cradling it carefully. It looked so fragile and delicate but holding it in your hands it felt like… it had some weight to it, sturdy and heavy. It’s a good soul, broken, but still good. “What’s that blue stuff?” you asked quietly, unable to pry your eyes from the black heart.

“That’s my magic” Sans voice was just as quiet as yours, almost sombre and vary.

“That’s not possible. Humans are unable to hold a monsters soul. That’s the whole reason the first war between humans and monsters broke out.” You closed your eyes for a second and turned your back at them. “That is the one big difference between us, your magic. It allows you to take our souls. But we cannot take yours. And by that extend, your magic. Humans were afraid and jealous and when humans are afraid, they attack. That’s why they are dangerous. It’s… not possible that you used your magic to seal the cracks in my soul. It should have killed all three of us.”

_“I.. am not sure where you know this from, this happened centuries ago. But… You are right.” Chara’s voice was gruff and cautious. “A humans soul could not have taken it and it would have been in vain. But you keep forgetting that you aren’t entirely human, Elaine. Your soul still has parts of Ree in it, it is made up of half of his at least. And you might have a human body but… you aren’t.”_

You kept staring at your soul, slightly crocking your head to the side. It would be so easy for you to just crush it in your hand and end everything. This tiny little thing right here was everything that made you who you were. A desperate laugh crawled up its way from your throat and you blinked rapidly. This thing here was what made you _you_ and still… it wasn’t even yours. You’ve been right before.

Everything special about you came from someone else. You were just the fleshy encasing around it. Taking it from point a to point b.

 _Would Chara like to have a body?_ you asked yourself very slowly, not sure how to deal with this lingering feeling. _We are almost identical. And they’ve proven before that they are much more capable of taking care of it than I am._ A bitter taste in your mouth, you swallowed. You could give up right now and just let them have it, but then again… You’ve made a promise and you weren’t the kind of woman that breaks a promise. Especially one of this size.   
Smiling, you closed your fist, grabbing your soul and a shiver running down your spine where you could feel the physical contact; a cocky grin on your face.   
Sans seemed to be vary of your reaction, as you chuckled to yourself.

“Laney…. Are you… alright?”

“I am just fine, Sans. But my fight hasn’t ended, on the contrary. It just begun.”

“Fight?” Still smiling, you pushed the soul back into your chest, immediately feeling lighter.

“I can hear Undyne outside talking to Curly, so we have about 45 seconds before she and Papyrus will come crashing in here.” You smiled at them, revelling in their confusion. Just for once, it was them not knowing what was going on instead of you being the dumb one. “I don’t hate you-either of you. I… I understand what you did but maybe…” You smiled sadly. “Maybe it was the wrong decision. But you’ve made yours. So now, you’ll have to let me make mine.” You turned away from them and walked towards the bedroom door but hesitated just mere inches away from the handle. “You know… What I said before I… I meant that, Sans…” Your face was burning red and you quickly slipped out into the hallway, the subtle click of the lock echoing through the room.

“I swear to god, that woman will be the death of me one day…” the skeleton mumbled and Chara crossed their arms.

“ _Tell me about it._ ”

 

 

The two of them sat at the table and watched you playing with Frisk, Undyne and Papyrus on the floor, her aunt elegantly draped on the couch next to Mettaton, closely observing her niece. The two of them seemed to get along very well. Curly was having coffee with some woman, Hel brought along. Tall, long wavy black hair, sharp eyes and clad in a brown leather trenchcoat, serious case of resting bitch face. She seemed serious and constantly observing the situation. Maybe she was a police officer? She certainly had the muscles for it.

Bubbly giggling came from you as you hugged Frisk close , your hair cascading over your shoulder. You looked so happy and peaceful right now, hiding away all your pain and worries just so you could avoid bothering anyone.

“I can’t believe she’s such a cutie now…” Sans overheart Curly snicker as she took another sip of coffee.

“Woah, you mean, she wasn’t always like this? Can’t imagine that…” The other woman said with her deep and smoky voice, arching one of her perfect eyebrows.

 _“I’m with what’s-her-face, I can’t imagine Laney being anything else than a cute little sparkly pink butterfly that’s stuck on a marshmallow!”_ Chara turned towards them interested. The woman huffed annoyed.

“It’s Alice, Dark for you, we’ve met before, actually.”

 _“What-eveeeer”_ The ghost rolled their eyes and put their chin into the open palm of their hand.

“What was Elaine like when she was young?” Sans asked carefully, prying his eyes off of you. Curly thought about her answer for a moment, chewing on her lip.

“She was… different. When we were children she was energetic and sweet and fun. Later, in school… Totally badass. Scary as fuck and a complete hothead. Always talked back to the teachers and other students. But also extremely passionate. We went to a fashion school and no one was better at making outfits than her, even though they weren’t quite in the norm as she preferred ballgowns and embroidery and stuff. And she was a very protective person, especially when it came to her sister. She never hurt anyone but oh boy, did she have a sharp tongue. She was super smart and had a talent for…. Trouble. And she didn’t give a single fuck, which wasn’t the best combination.” Chuckling, her eyes fell upon you, smiling a sad smile. “One time, in chemistry, our teacher was doing an experiment, where he was dropping something into everybody’s waterbottles-I think it was magnesium, but don’t quote me on that, it’s been a while-to showcase the differences of density but when he dropped it into Laneys bottle, it started floating.”

“Oh no…” Dark whispered, with a grin tugging at her red lips.

“Yeah, oh no is pretty god, because Staber, our teacher just quietly lit up a match and dropped it into the bottle. There was a huuuge darting flame and that’s the story how we found out that she was drinking pure Smirnoff in class.”

“That just makes her sound alcoholic”

“No, that makes her Irish. She also kinda burned a hole into our table one time, when she mixed up calium…Calium… Yo, Laney what did you use when you burned that plate-sized hole into your school desk in chem?” You turned your head, and lowly blinked at her.

“Caliumpermangat and Glycerin, why?”

“Oh, I’m just telling a few stories here!” You rolled your eyes, lips curling up.

“Don’t forget the story where I broke Denise’ nose in gym while we were playing dodgeball, I know you love that story!”

“Only because it was an accident since it bounced off the wall next to her before hitting her stupid face. I still don’t believe that it was an accident.”

“Oh it wasn’t. She was bullying Robin earlier because he had a lisp. So I gave her a lisp. At least for a month, it wasn’t any _permanent_ damage.”

She chuckled before staring into the distance, a thoughtful look of amusement on her face. “There’s also the one time she made a bomb, also in chem.”

“Okay, now that one was an accident!” you huffed and turned back to your game, pouting.

“ _She made…”_

“A bomb..” Sans finished Charas sentence, both of them completely baffled.

“Yeah, we were supposed to do something else but Madame didn’t listen to the instructions because that was before we discovered the vodka so she just mixed whatever. Unfortunately, what she was mixing together was Hydrogenperoxid and Acetone. Which is highly reactive and even the slightest commotion could have set it off. Our teacher noticed just in time and she got into a world of trouble but since it was an accident and her family had her hands in it, it wasn’t too bad. Yo, Laney, what did your Mom do, after the Hydrogenperoxid debakel?” You snickered and answered without turning away from the game.

“She got me a job. She said I was “under challenged” and I had to find some kind of outlet.”

“And?” Sans asked you but you just shrugged.

“I was okay at my job, so nothing interesting.” Hel on the couch shuffled a bit breaking conversation with Mettaton.

“Oh, shush you. You were fantastic at what you were doing, and I am sure you still are with your new job. Always putting in maximum effort. You come after your mother, both of you are complete workaholics!”

“She is right, darling~” Mettaton agreed. “You are exceptional at work. I have no idea how I’ve survived without your great assistance thus far.”

“Thanks, Metta…” You laughed. “But I am sure, you could have done just as well without me, Im just doing filing and paperwork and shouting at the interns for a while”

“And handling all of my planning and the galas and wardrobe and and and, take some credid where credit is due.”

“You are exaggerating…” You blushed heavily. “Oh by the way, do you have my phone? I.. Uh… dropped it in my office when… you know…” The robot just crooked his head.

“Your phone? I am sorry, I didn’t find one and neither did the cleaning personal…” Confused, you furrowed your brow.

“Weird… Must have lost it somewhere… Damn it, all of my games and selfies were on there…” You sighed. “I don’t think my household insurance covers “dying”, right?” Curly burst into a fit of giggling and you shook your head, attention turning back to Frisk when they pat your cheek.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, Elaine Asra Winters, the biggest riot you’ll ever meet. Well, not anymore, she’s pretty domesticated by now. Well done Sans, you’ve got yourself something I’d call Waifu Material.” A blue blush spread all over his face, making Chara burst out in laughter as well. The only one that seemed, somewhat concerned was Darky.

“Wait, wait, wait… Did you say… Asra?” Her forehead wrinkled, the slender, muscular body tense.

 _“Uh, yeah? Why? Heard it before?_ ” Dark covered the lower half of her face, to hold back her overwhelmed laughter.

“Who in my business hasn’t?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: some of these anecdotes really happened. I did some weird shit as a teenager.   
> Please dont use me as a rolemodel. Or Elaine.


	41. Boiling Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, fuck it, I want some cuteness! And awkward shenanigans!   
> Despite everything, Elaine is still a huge fucking idiot xD   
> And since a lot of things will be tackled here, why not make a list xD  
> -Asra?   
> -clever girl Elaine  
> -decieving Elaine  
> -scaryy af Elaine  
> -some past?  
> -Like, who exactly are the two people she hates????   
> -some shipping??   
> -alcohol and snow blobs  
> -shipping???  
> -protective Chara  
> -EVEN MORE SHIPPING????
> 
> EDIT: I was already done with this chapter and then my pc decided to go full on FUCK YOU and deleted the word file, so I had to rewrite it and was really upset because it was so good and now its kinda meh :((( Besides that, I've had a really rough time lately with a lo of crying nd everything, so things were already moving so slowly >////

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uuuuh, yeah, so I did something last weekend and I am kinda scared of showing you.... But... I cosplayed Elaine last weekend. And took like 6000000 pictures (that I will use for a plot device later, lmao) If you wanna see what Elaine looks like in an upcoming chapter-or in general-please tell me, and I will show you the official face of Elaine^tm 
> 
> ;_____;

It was pretty interesting, watching 2 pairs of brows-and one set of bones-furrow in perfect unison at Alice’ words, as she just kept snickering.

“Wait, wait wait…. Your kind of business? What kind of is that?”  

“Oh you know…” Alice shrugged, her hair bouncing up and down excitedly. “Just some light cr- _AP_!” she let out a sharp swear, as you tripped on your way to the kitchen, spilling the rest of your hot chocolate all over her.

“HUMAN, PLEASE DON’T SWEAR! IT IS NOT APROPRIATE AND SANS WILL MAKE YOU PUT SOME MONEY INTO OUR SWEAAR JAR!” Papyrus huffed.

“You have a swearjar?” Carmen snorted and Papyrus raised his eyebrow displeased.

“WE LIVE TOGETHER WITH THE TINY HUMAN, WE NEEDED ONE!”

“No wonder she’s constantly broke…” she snickered while Frisk hurried over to check up on you.

**Are you okay, Laney?**

“Haha, yeas, don’t worry, I just tripped over the edge of the carpet” You smiled at Frisk, before turning towards a disgusted and drenched Mafiosi Donna. “I am so sorry, Alice, I didn’t mean to! Please don’t be mad!” Innocently, you batted your long lashes at her but she just huffed.

“Urks, yeah, no problem, but this is disgusting! And my top is completely drenched now! What is this? Cocoa? It’s so sticky!” You blushed heavily, trying to hide behind your own face.

“I am so sorry, gosh, I must be the worst. Please, let me help you! You can have one of my sweaters, I should have some things that should fit you while I wash your things real quick!” You put your hand around your arm, but she only gave you a thin lipped smile.

“No, please, don’t bother, you’ve had some rough-“

“No, I _insist_! I wanna make up for my clumsiness, or else I’ll feel bad for _weeks_!” She rolled her eyes at your teary doe-eyes but Chara snickered.

_“You should go with her, she isn’t lying if she’s saying that she’ll feel bad for ages. If you’re lucky, she won’t cry._ ” You nodded and pulled a bit harder on her sleeve so she admitted defeat and got up with an annoyed sigh.

“Fine! But only because you just died and this is really sticky. Just… try not be as clumsy… Gee…” You smiled happily at her and your step had a slight bounce in it, as you walked to the bedroom, smiling kindly.

“You can change in the bathroom while I go and find something for you!” you chirped and the woman just grunted dismissively. Quickly, you dug through your clothes and grabbed just something long and wide, to make sure she would definitely fit into it without showing off her midriff. She might have the bod of a perfect 12 but still at least 25cm taller than you. Carefully, you knocked on the door, holding out the clothes. “I found something for you~. Please give me your stuff so I can wash out the stains~” your voice was sweet and chirpy. The door opened just an inch and the strong hands snatched it from you, while handing you the damp clothes before throwing the door into your face. Immediately, the smile was wiped off of your face and you dropped the wet shirt on the floor without a second thought.

“This is a bit short, but it’ll work for the time due… Thanks for washing my shirt, you really don’t have to do it and-hey, why did you just drop it on the floor?” Her brows knitted together in anger so much that they almost touched. “That is designer!” Her face suddenly paled as your fist crashed into the wall next to her, barely missing her. A serious “imma cut that bish” look on your face.

“I have no idea what you are trying to do, but you are _not_ gonna talk about that Asra-thing. Ever. To anyone, do you hear me?” You hissed at her and Alice’ eyes got bigger, an excited smile on her lips.

“So I was right! You _ARE_ her!”

“No. It’s ‘n the past. I’m a different woman now, this Asra you know is dead for a long time. And you are not gonna bring this back!”

“But-don’t you know what you could _do_?” You narrowed your eyes, only glaring at her now.

“I don’t care, _Darky_! I have a calm life now and they will never find out about it. I-I finally managed to leave all of the shit behind me and I won’t let it be taken away from me again. If anyone knew they’d… they wouldn’t understand, they would hate me. I love all of them and I won’t lose them. No matter what I have to do. It’s behind me. Treat it like that and we can be friends. You want to be my friend, right?” Breathing heavily, you pushed away from her and picked up the damp clothes to go and wash them now.

“Wait… Say.. what if… what if I still tell them?” There was a glimmer of defiance in her voice and you chuckled deeply.

“Well, then it would be _you_ that brought Asra back. And quite frankly, neither of us would like a scenario like that.” Now it was her turn to glare at you.

“Did you just _threaten_ me?” Still smiling, you patted her cheek.

“ _Yes_ ~”

Funny, how scary such a tiny and delicate little girl could be while smiling the sweetest smile and looking as innocent as ever.

 

Humming along to the radio, you stirred the food in the pan while Sans tucked Papyrus in. You could hear the two of them talk with hushed voices in the other room but other than that, it was quiet in the apartment. Everyone else already left a few hours ago, Curly needed to get back home and you didn’t seem like you’d be dying on the spot, so she didn’t worry too much, and the others didn’t want to cause too much trouble at the first occasion and risk to throw you off all of a sudden. Chara was sitting on the kitchentable with you, reading a book. You had the idea earlier in the day, and proposed to them that they could use the Tablett Mettaton has gotten you for work to read something since it was voice commanded, so they didn’t need a corporeal form to enjoy something they’ve missed so dearly. Watching their happy and calm smile made you feel all fuzzy and warm on the inside. You liked seeing them this relaxed, it made you feel like they were slowly getting better. Being stuck as a ghost after everything they’ve been through, getting corrupted and ripped apart over and over again. That shit does some damage to your mind.

A pair of arms snuck around your waist to pull you into a hug and you let out a tiny shriek of surprise as Sans nuzzled his face into the back of your shoulder.

“Sans! You scared me!” you scolded him but your voice was full of kindness and a serene smile on your lips. He simply increased the pressure a tiny bit and chuckled deeply.

“Sorry, Laney. Just couldn’t resist…” Giggling, you turned in his embrace and kissed the nasal ridge between his eyes. “I just have so mushroom ín my heart for you” He winked at you while stealing a piece of the champignons for the sauce of off the cutting board and flicking it at you.

“You are a dork”

“I’m your dork now!” His smile turned dopey and your expression softened before you pulled him in for a slow and sensual kiss.

_“If you guys gonna keep this up, I promise you I will find a way to turn back physical and vomit over everything you love!”_ Charas tone seemed disgusted even though they didn’t look up from the screen. “Turn to next page”

“Jokes on you, Chara, you’ll be vomiting on yourself!”

_“Holy shit, that was so smooth!”_ They looked at you in surprise and you blew them a tiny kiss.

“I aim to please.”

_“Kinky.”_ Rolling your eyes, you sprinkled the vegetables into the sauce and added some white wine.

“Sans, can you put up the table, I’ve made a quick snack. You want some as well?”

“Sure, can’t refuse your fine cuisine.”

“You are just saying that, my cooking isn’t that great.”

“ _Everything is great if you compare it to Undyne and Papyrus!”_

“Chara, they aren’t that bad!” You giggled. “Stop being unfair.”

_“I’m just honest. I’m just gonna remind you of last week. They almost put it glue.”_

“Okay, yeah, that wasn’t their greatest moment, but they are still learning!” You took the plates Sans was offering you and put on the rice and sauce absentmindedly at the same time as you were scolding Chara.   
You sat down next to Sans and kinda instantly took his hand under the table, blushing as you realised what you just did. When you tried to let go again, he just squeezed it approvingly and you blushed even more.

“It tastes really good, babe, it’s nice to have something else than spaghetti for once!”

“I just couldn’t let you get fast food again, and I know, spaghetti are nice, but after having to eat them almost every day, I just can’t see them anymore right now. And I had a rough few days, I am allowed to indulge in some other things.”

_“Wow, I’m not even gonna get a plate? Rude!”_

“It’s not like you could eat it, Chara!”

_“It’s the thought that counts! Also, ow, that one was low!”_ Your lips curled again and you shoved your plate towards them with an eyeroll.

“Fine, whatever, here, try some” You sighed shook your head slightly. “You know, sometimes I really hate you.”

_“You don’t Elaine.”_ Chara chuckled and patted your cheek. _“You are physically incapable to feel and express hatred, that’s Ree’s part of the involvement. You are absolutely precious and kind and sweet and mushy”_ It should have sounded endearing and cute, a sweet compliment on your kindness but instead, you pressed your lips together with a frown and stood up in a sharp motion. The chair made a loud screeching sound as it scraped over the floor that still echoed as you walked over to the sink, grabbing a glass of water. _“Lan-“_

“You are wrong. I can feel hate. I do feel it. I am not as sweet as you think and I hate someone”

_“Yeah, but Hugh doesn’t count. He’s a prick.”_

“I don’t _hate_ Hugh.” You admitted, your knuckles turning white as you grabbed the edge of the sink harder. “I-I fear and pity him. But not hate. He doesn’t deserve it.”

“Then- Who do you hate?” Sans asked carefully and you turned your head with a sad smile.

“The only two people worse.”

“Why do you hate them?” he asked, surprised, that you were able to feel something this destructive. “What made you?” Still smiling, you walked over to grab the plates and rinse them off before putting them into the dishwasher. You took a while before you answered.

“I loved them. And deep down… I still kinda do. Which only makes it worse.” You were glad that they couldn’t see your face at the moment, as a sadness they’ve never seen before ghosted over your features. It was the expression of someone with a long broken heart.

 

_“Sans, wake up”_ Chara’s voice was trying and they were expressing their best resting-bitch face.

“What do you want, hellspawn?” Sans sat up groaning, holding back a yawn.

_“Elaine got drunk while watching Steven Universe and started crying over some fictional characters. And then she watched Voltron and cried even more because “her hot space boys are so in love” and “how adorable Space Dad is”. And let’s not forget her usual rants about Allura. God, she hates Allura. How can you hate Allura? She’s so badass???”_ Chara sighed. _“And now she’s outside playing in the snow.”_

“What”

“ _She wont listen to me and I cant physically drag her back inside_ ” Groaning annoyed, he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and rubbed his face. The clock next to him showed 4.16am

“What even can you do?”

_“Just shuddup and get her inside”_

“I hate you so much, you know that?”

_“It’s a mutual feeling, idiot”_ And with that, they vanished, probably back to look after Elaine.

“Stupid fucking good for nothing ghost…” the skeleton mumbled and shuffled though his apartment and looked down the courtyard over the rail from up his floor. When he spotted you downstairs, he couldn’t hold back a snort and pulled out his phone, ringing up your new phone. He could hear your dorky ringtone echo up to him.

“Spooky scary skeletons? Really, Laney?”

“You should hear what ringtones I have for the others! Also, why are you awake?”

“Why are you lying in the snow like a deformed turtle?”

“I am making snow angels here! It’s called having fun!” He chuckled and leaned on the railing.

“Looks more like snow blobs from up here.”

“Rude. I hereby revoke all of your cuddle privileges!”

“Oh no the humanity!” He replied dryly and without any emotion “Whatever shall I do now!”

“Bollix” you huffed and you stuck out one arm towards him.

“What are you doing?”

“Flipping you off”

“Rude.”

“You’re the one to talk, Sans! Why are you even up! I was being so careful to not wake you up”

“Your ghost called me. You are lying in the snow with nothing but your pj’s after all”

“Fucking snitch.” He heard you bicker at Chara. “I trusted you and you betrayed my trust!”

_“Well, you were dumb enough to go outside and freeze to death. I’m pretty sure you’d’ve fallen asleep and actually died. Again”_

“WELL….. YOU ARE UGLY!”

_“WE LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME!”_

“I KNOW!”

_“Wow, that’s sad”_ The telephone let out a distressed whine as Sans stepped through one of his shortcuts down to where you were still splayed out in the snow. He could instantly feel blue spread across his cheeks, when he saw you. Your now over shoulder length ginger hair had those pretty curles in it he adored so much and set you apart from Chara and you went wearing much more than your cotton booty shorts and a tank top.

“Aren’t you freezing?”

“No because I am fucking hammered! I played the Steven Universe drinking game because I got bored during embroidering the mark up for Curly.”

“How much did you have exactly?”

_“Four and a quarter shots”_

“You can take more than that usually, what is wrong”

_“I know why, I’ll explain it to you tomorrow.”_

“You do?” You chirped and Chara rolled their eyes.

_“Just get her to bed.”_

“Noooooooooooo, I dun wannaaaaa” you whined. Sans snorted at your adorable protest and just protested to hoist you up over his shoulder like you were a goddamn sack of potatoes. “God damn it Sans, if I weren’t so fucking drunk, I’d just deck you”

“You couldn’t even deck me normally, tiny!” he chuckled and proceeded to open up another shortcut directly into his bedroom.

“I’d deck you any day of the week, try me bisch, I’ll wipe that sexy as fuck smurk off yer fashe!” You started to seriously slur, the alcohol going straight to your head now that you hung basically upside down. “Winner gets a wish!”

“I’d whoop your Ass, Laney, and not in a sexy way!”

“I beat’cha ‘fore!”

“That was only because you had the tactical advantage of Chara and me being unable to think properly! I’d straight up wreck you in a fair fight” he laughed and she wriggled a bit too much in his grip as he tried to set her down on the bet so she slipped his grip and he almost threw her into the mattress. A tiny noise left her lips as the wind got knocked out from her, pupils dilated.

“A real fight isn’t fair, Sans.” When you spoke, your voice sounded raw and sultry. “also, that just was fucking hot, cmere, Sans.” You grabbed his wrist and pulled him down to you. “Hellow there handsome~” you said in a sing sang voice and tried to wrap your arms around his neck.

“What are you doing?” You furrowed you eyebrows in confusion.

“I’m seducing you? Is this not how it works in a relationship?”

“Elaine, you are drunk.” He groaned as you pressed your body flush against his, pressing an open mouthed kiss against his temple. “I’m not gonna have sex with you when you are drunk.” Making a disapproving sound you pushed a bit back to shot him a displeased look.

“Is it because I got drunk and went outside?”

“No-I mean kinda you are drunk but-“

“Or am I not pretty enough?” Groaning, he screwed his eyes shut, one of his hands carelessly caressing your sides.

“You are so blind if you think that you aren’t the most beautiful thing ever.”

“Then why? C’mon I deserve a bit of fun, Sans~” you purred.

“Because I’d feel like taking advantage of you.” Obviously annoyed by his answer, you rolled over to your other side, grumbling a bit.

“Fine then…” you huffed and slowly let one of your hands slide lower. Just before it could slip under the waistband of your boyshorts, the strong but firm skeletal hand grabbed yours.

“What are you doing?”

“Myself?” He pounced you with a low growl, pinning your hands above your head. And shit, if that wasn’t hot, or what?

“No way!” He peppered light kisses all along your jaw and you mewled in pleasure. “Come on, be a good girl and come to bed with me. And tomorrow, when you aren’t drunk off your ass…” He leaned in closer and you blushed harder. “I’ll give you aaaall the things you could ask for~” Mewling, you hid your face behind your hands.

“Holy fucking shit, you can’t just _say_ shit like that!” Sans merely chuckled deeply and cuddled closer to you, nuzzling his face into your shoulder and wrapping his arms around you.

“Well, you started it, didn’t you, pretty lady?” His hand stroked over the white, scared patch on your leg and his browbone furrowed.  “I did that, didn’t I? When we were fighting?” You shrugged with one shoulder, your expression pretty much indifferent.

“Doesn’t matter. You weren’t yourself… And I was too slow, relied on Chara… I should have just done it myself” You slurred a bit but this striked his interest.

“What do you mean?”

“As I said… A real fight isn’t fair.” You yawned loudly, stretching in his grip like a pleased cat. “Sans?”

“Yes Babe?”

“If we can’t have sex, can I at least have some water please? Else I’ll be gangrenous in the morning” He chuckled low and kissed the corner of your mouth before getting up. You smiled broadly, though your eyes were already closed.

“Of course.”

“Thanks…” You mumbles something he couldn’t quite understand but he was pretty sure that it was something along the likes of “luv ya” and suddenly his face felt pretty much on fire. He couldn’t get out of the room fast enough to cool down for a second. Surely, you’d be the death of him one day. When he returned, you were already fast asleep, basically starfishing across the entire bed, a piece of drool escaping the corner of your mouth as you snored quietly. Gosh, you were adorable. “What a fucking princess”

 

Soft and warm kisses against your bare shoulder woke you in the morning and a ray of sunlight tickled your nose. Smiling, you sat up a big and pried open your eyes.

“Good morning, my love~” a way too familiar voice greeted you, deep and sensual and an unpleasant shiver ran down your spine. Deep blue eyes, almost purple and silvery blonde hair greeted you as you stared at the most beautiful girl of them all, her freckles dancing across her face as she smiled. Gosh, she still looked so good back then when you were young. Confused, you shook your head. This must be a dream.

“Sybil?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hurhurhur...
> 
> Fun Fact: I hate Allura with burning passion. And I am Voltron and Steven Universe Trash.


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